The story of a lonesome ol'Jerome

*Gwyn's POV*

“Gwyn,” I said.

“Gwen?”

“No, with a ‘y.’ G-w-y-n...”

“Right, look, Gwyn. I still think you seriously need to relax for a while. While it was pretty epic that you went after that big dude like an angry honey badger, you got so bent out of shape, you could have really hurt him just because he was a douche. I'm not sure exactly what went down, but like you said, I don't think you want to end up in jail. So will you please agree to just come hang out with me for a while until you simmer down?” And Andy looked at me, and what mattered was that I could see that he cared what my answer was. Why, I wondered?

“Well, ehm, I don’t really remember all of what happened, right at the moment. But, uh, sure, I’m down to hang out. But, I mean, I don’t want to be in the way. I don’t know, like, at all, what sorts of things bands do. Or need to do. Um, you know, when you need to leave for your next, uh, tour date and, eh, stuff.” And what he said next fucking surprised the shit out of me.

“Awesome! Well, what I need more than anything is to talk to someone about my girl, Juliet. I need a girl’s advice, a girl’s perspective. Please?” He looked hopeful and a little scared, maybe self-conscious at having asked.

I laughed, “Dude, I am totally not a girly-girl. I am not at all the person to ask.” He started to look like he was going to protest, but I cut him off. “No, seriously. I'm pansexual, and I’m polyamorous. I’m not particularly feminine. I mean, Mr. Biersack-“

“-Andy please,” he chimed in, “and we are not so different. I’m not particularly feminine,” he grinned, “I'm not a girly-girl, and I am also polyamorous, though not pansexual.”

Notes

I just found the most hilarious thing online:
Is your teenaged daughter suffering from Andy Biersack Obsession Disorder?

My favorite section:
"Listen to the big, rich voice of Andy Biersack, emitting a powerful, spine-tingling voice far beyond what a boy of his smallish frame and demeanor should be capable of having. His voice packs the energy of Metallica’s lead singer and the wild range and pure, sensual passion of none other than Freddie Mercury combined with George Michael. This is truly an evil sound and one must ask, what would possess innocent girls to listen to such things."

*chortle*