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anathema: 1. A person or thing detested or loathed. 2. A person or thing accursed or consigned to damnation or destruction. Note these are the secular meanings- religious use of the word varies a great deal by text and faith.

i am aware there is a band called Anathema. i did not choose my name for that reason, i learned of them years afterwards.

here is a link to my wattpad account
here is a link to my tumblr

Some favorite quotes:

"Stand for what you believe in, even if it means standing alone." -AB

"The time is always right to do what is right." -MLK Jr

"When you're taught to love everyone, to love your enemies, then what value does that place on love?" -MM

"Drop Pants, not Bombs. Break Dance, not Hearts. Draft Beer, not People. Make LOVE not WAR." -AP

"If you lose who you are, what do you have?" -MM

"Whatever bullies say or do, it comes from their weakness, not yours." -TH

"People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they're not on your road doesn't mean they've gotten lost." -DL

Words of wisdom and to live by. As for me- I am an old, bitter, pessimist.

Favorite lyrics (there are so many, but here are just a few, I'll keep adding as I think of them...):

"Love burns its casualties" -(The Last Day on Earth, Mechanical Animals, Marilyn Manson, 1998)

"The glitter is rusting at my feet" -(Spinning, Vampire Love Dolls, 1997)

"My soul is colored red, from all the love I've bled" -(Crave, Horror Wrestling, Drain s.t.h., 1997)

"I never knew that hope was fatal until I looked it in the eye." -(Goodbye Agony, BVB4, BVB, 2015)

"If hell is a life without love, am I being punished for what I’ve done?" -(End of the World, All or Nothing, Juliet Simms, 2015)

"Never give in, Never back down, Never give in, Never back down,
When your life feels lost {Fight against all odds!}
Never give in {Never back down!}" -(Never Give In, We Stitch These Wounds, BVB, 2010)

"Even with these chains, you can't stop me,
Even with these chains, you can't stop me,
Even with these chains, you can't stop me,
Even in these chains, you won't break me,
Even in these chains, you won't stop me,
Even in these chains, you won't break me,
Even in these chains, you won't take me,
Even in these chains, you won't haunt me!"
-(Big Bad Wolf, Black Widow, In This Moment, 2014)

"I will not take this anymore,
These words will never be ignored,
You want a battle,
Here's a war!" -(You Want a Battle? (Here's a War), Venom, Bullet for My Valentine, 2015)

"Show me a bleeding heart still pounds" -(Unbroken, Avengers Assemble: Music from and Inspired by the Motion Picture, BVB, 2013)

a few songs are lyrical masterpieces or favorites of mine:

'The Fighter' by In This Moment

'The Unforgiven' by Metallica

'Antichrist Superstar' by Marilyn Manson

i took this picture, please credit me if you wish to use it.


  • do you write anywhere else?
    • not for profit. my stories are also slowly getting posted on wattpad (link above). LOJ in particular is available there in its final, edited format.
  • are you really a veterinarian?
    • yes.
  • will you read my story?
    • if it's really, really short. i'm already busy. always feel free to send me a link, and i will always check out part of it. but you need to clarify whether you can handle extreme, blunt criticism (which will be very harsh), or if you want minor, friendly, encouraging points (which will be nicer). also, i am very opinionated and judgmental, it might be a lot more useful to ask someone else.
  • i thought i saw you at a show in WA/OR/CA/wherever, how can i be sure?
    • by respectfully approaching me and asking. don't take my picture, it's the reason i have started having to bring a scarf with me. while i'm fine chatting with fans, i'm not ok with having pictures taken of me, it's a licensing issue related to the uniform disciplinary act, which is very subjective. whatever you do, please don't just follow me around and stare, it's weird.
    • really want to impress me? greet me by singing some part of the Murderdolls' song 'Blood Stained Valentine.' at the least, i prefer people are discreet and not mention my stories/characters/screen name unless it's obvious i'm alone and not in the company of potential co-workers, etc.
    • i usually have one or more of the following on at a show specifically because people have asked to be able to recognize me:
      • my necklace with the rod of Asclepius (AVMA version) on the NTIO coffin nail necklace
      • a black shirt for 'buffalo bill's body lotion'
      • a black scarf with white skulls on it
  • will you give me advice on how to write?
    • sure:
      • click to read the guide to writing real person fanfic that i co-authored.
      • the following are tropisms in BVB fanfiction and should be avoided in general:
      • incest, adoption, bandcest (e.g., andley), hot topic, stories in which the protagonist is in a band on tour with BVB (especially Warped, spare me from Warped tour stories!), self-harm, para-suicidal gesturing, underage sex with older partners, unplanned pregnancy, condomless sex, sensationalized rape, sensationalized abuse, Juliet as an evil villain, stories in which Jake & Ella or Jinxx & Sammi are still together (etc.), smut that is badly written. high school involvement in general is iffy, but if you're still in high school, i can understand why you'd choose that setting.
      • personally, i can't generally abide by stories in which the protagonist is supposedly monogamous, and yet is unfaithful. pet peeve. i also have a strong dislike for stories involving pregnancy (i really don't want kids), when the author kills the protagonist (rant: unless they bring them back ASAP, it's a sign that you don't know how else to end your story and of inferior planning- for shame! when you kill the protagonist ALWAYS put tragedy as one of your genres or lose my respect as an author!), and i'm not terribly keen on marriage stories, as i don't intend to marry, i practice polyamory and don't want a primary.
      • sketch out the whole plot before you start your story. (i.e., outline it)
      • keep writing more and more. keep reading more and more. you will improve. keep your old writing to compare to, to analyze your progress.
  • will you co-author with me?
    • no, i'm sorry. i can't write that way. don't take it personally. i've already got too much going on, too many ideas, and i couldn't handle it. i just don't work that way.


Night Watch I: Eliza, Ward of Andrew

Night Watch I: Eliza, Ward of Andrew

NC-17 Romance Fantasy War

Andrew is a Night Forest Fae, Second Officer of the Night Watch. His partner, Juliet, was killed in a raid 3 years ago & he's been in mourning. His whole life is shaken up when a criminal exile is dropped in his lap as his charge.


Completed ✓
10.0 36 Votes
Night Watch II: Second Officer Andrew

Night Watch II: Second Officer Andrew

NC-17 Romance Fantasy War

The Soul of the Forest, vital source of all life energy, has been stolen from the Wild Ones by an unknown, malevolent force. Can Second Officer Andrew prevent it from being used for catastrophic evil? [Note: this is a sequel]


10.0 7 Votes
Character and background book for Night Watch Series

Character and background book for Night Watch Series

R Fantasy Biography

There are a lot of characters in the Night Watch series. This is an expanded book to introduce them all in greater depth, with greater convenience of reference.


10.0 5 Votes


NC-17 Romance Fantasy Religious

This is a story about Oona, a succubus who has become fascinated with Andy.


Completed ✓
10.0 62 Votes
A Handy-dandy Guide to Writing Real Person Fiction

A Handy-dandy Guide to Writing Real Person Fiction

R Comedy Drabble

Behold! A short, opinionated guide to writing real person fiction!


Completed ✓
9.8 19 Votes
The story of a lonesome ol'Jerome

The story of a lonesome ol'Jerome

NC-17 Romance Comedy Fantasy

Gwyn is an older BVB fan with issues. She's apprehensive about going to a show where many fans are younger than her. After getting in an altercation, she finds herself in an unexpected situation. (Beware: AB sm*t, silliness, ball-punching, pacts with Satan, etc.)


Completed ✓
10.0 43 Votes