The Girl With The Dragon's Blood

It had been several days since the incident at the concert. When I woke up I was in one of the bunks on the tour bus. I walked into the bathroom and had to click my jaw back into place. Someone. I assumes Christi had changed me into sports shorts and a black tank top. She knew about my scars but she also knew yet weren't life threatening but were for control. I slowly walked back out into the living room area and everyone was staring at me. Then Christi asked me if I remembered what had happened. I shook my head. I didn't remember anything after getting to the venue. Christi sat me down with tears in her eyes and then explained what happened to me. Ending with Ashley knocking me out. But instead of freaking out like I originally did I thanked Ashley and then held Christi's shaking body close. Christi's mom planned the funeral and I had to meet with my mothers lawyer that afternoon. Christi and her mother came with us. I managed to get a shower an wash off all of the remaining body paint and get dressed in black sweats and a black t-shirt. When we met with her lawyer it turned out she had left everything to me but Christi's mom would be my guardian until I turned eighteen which was only 3 months from now. Christi and her mom would move in with me for the time being so that I didn't have to leave my house. During the whole thing I never said a word. I just stared blankly ahead not feeling. I had permanently retreated into my ice shell and I didn't plan on coming out any time soon. Everyone looked at me with pity and sorrow in their eyes but I did nothing. Said nothing. The next day had been my mothers funeral. I ha worn white instead of my normal black. I wore a simple white dress with flats and no makeup. It was my moms favorite look. After that I just floated through in a daze. I didn't eat and I didn't talk I didn't sleep. I would shower in the morning and change my clothes but then I would walk to my mothers room and lay on the bed curled up in a ball. I would lay there all night just staring at nothing until the sun started to rise and then I would get a shower and repeat my cycle. This went on for days with people coming in and trying to talk to me or coax me into eating something but I would just lay there and stare into the distance and eventually they would give up and leave. After a few days my routine was interrupted. I had just gotten out of the shower and looked in the mirror. My body was becoming frail and weak. I had started hacking from exhaustion and lack I food and my bones were starting to show. I turned away and put on some sweats and a tank top and was walking slowly towards my mothers room when I was stopped by someone standing in my way. It was Ashley. I looked up and silently told him to move but he just shook his head. I moved to go around him but he stopped me. I turned a glare on him and he glared back. "You can't keep doing this to yourself Tora. It's not healthy." I shrugged. What did I care its not like it mattered anyways. He kept saying things like that but I blocked him out until he said the one thing that hit a nerve. I was aware we were gathering an audience when he finally pulled me into him and whispered in my ear. "It's not what your mother would want Tora. You have to stop this." He said quietly and I quickly shoved him away. I stared at him angrily silently telling him to leave it alone but he wouldn't. "What Tora? You know I'm right. You know that what your doing right now would make her sad." He prodded. I felt anger rising up in my belly and I hissed at him. "Shut up! Just stop fucking talking. How the hell would you know anything about my mother. She's gone okay. Is that ht you want to here because she is. Now move before I make you move!" I said dangerously. It was the first thing I had said in days. He looked me in the eyes and shook his head. "I'm not moving Tora. I won't let you destroy yourself like this. If you want to hit me then fine hit me but I'm not going to move unless I'm unconscious." He said. I stepped foreword an landed a blow on his face. He stumbled back a step but held his ground. And then I was yelling at him. "Shut up. Just shut up. Why won't you just leave me alone?" I screamed by this point I was pounding his chest but my attempts were weak because I ha gone so long without food. "You don't know anything. She's gone and its all my fault. I should have been here. I should have made sure she was safe but I didn't and now she's gone. She's gone!" I screamed. I kept pounding on his chest but he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me closer. "It's not your fault Tora. It never was and she wouldn't want you to think like that." He whispered. I stopped trying to hit him and looked him in the eye. "She's gone Ashley. She's really gone." I said quietly and then for the first time in my life I cried. I cried into Ashley's chest and let him hold me as I sank to the ground in defeat. I cried for all of the birthdays and holidays with the woman that was both my mother and father when no father was present. I cried for the times I would come home angry because of the bullies. I cried for the training sessions in the dojo that we would never have again. I cried for the loss of the only person who had loved me completely for my whole life without judgement. I cried for my mommy who was the strongest person in my life. And for once my beast and I were completely in sync. We mourned the loss of the only family we ever had. The whole time Ashley held me and rocked me back and forth murmuring that it would be okay. But he to was crying. In the back of my mind I realized everyone was standing around us. Christi once again sat crying in Cc's arms while her mother rubbed her back. Andy and Jake both looked down at me with images tears in their eyes while Jinxx sat next to Ashley and was trying to help reassure me that it would be fine and they were my family now. He was the most fatherly figure in my life and I clung to that. I was still curled into Ashley's chest and was being rocked back and forth while I held Jinxx's hand in a death grip. Finally my loud sobs grew softer and I faded into sleep.

Notes

So I totally cried while wrote this chapter. :( I hope everyone likes it though. Please give thoughts and opinions. I love you all.
XOXO
SavedByCarolyn