The Cost Of Winning

ASHLEY'S POV :

I pick up my phone and hit Fianna's number , for my nightly pre - bedtime talk with Brenna , and when the call connects , I hear , "Hi , Daddy ! How you is ?"

"I'm fine , sweetie , how are you ? How was school today ?"

"Don't wike school no more ! Not fun !" , she informs me .

"Why not , cutie ? I thought you liked to go and play with the other kids ." , I say .

"Ivy goed away , her not comes to school no more . Hers daddy can'ts find hims job , and me thinks that them no gots no more moneys , so Miss Kim say she can'ts no more come ."

" I'm sorry , Bren , but maybe Mommy can call Ivy's daddy and have him bring her to play with you sometime . Or maybe you guys could even come over here one day ."

"But still no fun at school . When you comes to see me , Daddy ?" , she asks .

"I'll come over to see you day after tomorrow , Bren , and we'll think of something fun to do . Now , you need to be a good girl for Mommy , and don't argue with her about brushing your teeth , okay ?"

She hesitates for a couple of seconds , then , in a tiny little voice , she says , "Daddy , me was naughty . Does yous still wikes me ?"

"Of course I do , sweetie ! Daddy loves you even if you're naughty , just like Mommy does ! But what did you do ?"

"I don'ts wikes my supper , so I puts it on the fwoor , and Mommy say I cant'ts watches Sofie 'fore I goes to bed , cause that was naughty ."

"Yes , that was very naughty , Brenna , you shouldn't do that . Mommy cooks good food for you , and you shouldn't waste it . And Mommy has to clean up the floor , and she's probably tired from work , so that isn't nice to her ." , I tell her .

"But it not good food , Daddy ! Don'ts wike it !"

"Then you should just tell Mommy you don't like it , and ask her for a sandwich or something , but don't throw it in the floor . That isn't very nice ."

"I sowwy , Daddy ! Me no do it no more ." , she says , sounding like she's almost ready to cry .

"Did you tell Mommy you were sorry ? You should tell her , not me ."

"I sowwy , Mommy ! No wants you be mad on me , you is my goodest fwend !" , I hear through the phone . I can faintly hear Fianna murmuring in the background , then Bren comes back on , and says ,"Daddy , Mommy wants you talk to her now . Night night , Daddy , me wuvs you !"

"I love you too , cutie ! Sweet dreams !" , I say , then Fianna comes on the line .

"I'm kind of surprised she admitted that to you ." , she says . "She was scared to death that you wouldn't like her anymore if you knew she did something wrong ."

"Well , I hope she knows better now ." , I respond . "What did you give her , anyway ?"

"Apparently , our daughter isn't a fan of tuna salad sandwiches ." , she informs me . " But she's never made that big of a fuss about something she doesn't want to eat before . I think it might have something to do with her being upset about Ivy not being able to come to daycare anymore ."

"Yeah , she told me she doesn't like it anymore , because it's not fun now . That just sucks , on top of what happened to her mom , now apparently her dad is out of work ."

"I know , it's got to be rough ." , she says . "Jeff is a nice guy , and Ivy is pretty much the axis of his world , so none of this is gonna be easy for him ."

"Bren said you wanted to talk to me about something ." , I say . "What's going on ?"

"I just wondered if you might be free tomorrow morning ?" , she asks

"Yeah , I think so . Why ?"

"Well , Bren and I are going shopping with Miki and Ryan tomorrow , for some stuff for their wedding ." , she tells me . " And since we're going to be out , I'm planning to get Bren's picture taken with Santa , and I thought maybe you'd like to come along ."

I practically fall off of the couch when I hear this ! "Absolutely ! I'd love to see that , if you're sure nobody will mind ." , I say . " Are you sure Miki won't blow a gasket if I show up ?"

"We had a talk after Thanksgiving , and I think she's finally figured out that it's not good for Brenna if she keeps being hostile . I won't say she's gonna suddenly want to be besties with you , but I think she'll manage to be civil ."

"Terrific , I wouldn't miss it , then ! I have to go by my office for a few , but I can meet you , if you tell me when and where ."

She tells me what store the Santa is at , and what time they plan to be there , and I agree to meet them there , and she ends the call to put Bren to bed .

I'm in a great mood for the rest of the night , because this is the first time that she's actually included me in something that isn't even on one of my visiting days . Maybe we're actually making progress .

__________________________________________________________

When my alarm goes off , I get up , grab a quick shower , and get dressed , then head in to the office , so I can get my shit done before I need to meet up with Fi and Brenna . But , when I walk through the door , I'm met by some rather unhappy employees .

My night - shift security guard , Barry , who was supposed to be off two hours ago , is still here , talking to my receptionist , Karla , and there's no sign of Keith , who's supposed to take his place .

"Keith out sick today ?" , I inquire .

"No , Ash , he called in and quit , effective immediately ." , Karla replies . "Apparently , his girlfriend decided to move back to Oregon , where her folks live , and he's going with ."

"Great ! Just fucking fabulous !" , I groan . "Well , I hate doing it , but go ahead and call one of the temp places , and we'll get somebody in until I can interview to hire someone permanently ." , I tell her , and she immediately gets on the phone .

"Thanks for hanging around , Barry ." , I say . "You'll get overtime pay for this , of course , and we'll get you out of here as quick as possible ."

"I'll be okay , boss , tonight's my night off ." , he replies . "Just try to replace the doofus as quick as you can . I don't think anybody wants to pull twelve hour shifts ."

After a few minutes , Karla says that the temp service will be sending someone out ASAP , so I finally get to my office and get my stuff done , then jet out to head to the mall .

I head for the craft store , where Fianna says that they're doing the Santa pictures , and wander the aisles until I see Ryan's head above a display . I walk in that direction , and see Fianna and Miki looking over strings of beads , putting some of them into their carts , and others back on the shelf .

Bren looks up , from her seat in Fianna's cart , and shrieks , "Daddy ! Here you is ! Mommy , here Daddy is !"

She starts wiggling , trying to get out of the cart , so I pick her up and ask , "Since I'm here , do I get a hug ?", and she flings her arms around my neck and squeezes .

"Daddy , Mommy say we's gonna see Sampy Plause , and takes a pitcher ! Is yous gonna watches me ?"

"That's why I'm here , cutie !" , I tell her . "What are you doing now ?"

"We wented and gots pwetty dwesses for thems party , Daddy ! Mines dwess is purble !" , she announces . "Now them is getting stuffs so Mommy cans makes some pwetties for we's to wear wif ours dwesses ."

I look over and see a pretty big pile of beads , charms , fasteners , and other things in Miki's cart , in several shades of lavender , mint green , and peach , and a smaller selection in Fi's cart , in sort of a random assortment , mostly brighter .

She sees me looking , and says , "The big pile is for Miki , and all of the bridesmaids . This stuff is just for me to fool around with at home ."

"Well , I'm glad you have something to keep from getting bored ." , I reply .

She opens her mouth to say something else , but before she can , we hear a high - pitched shriek of "Bwenna ! I see you !" , and a small black girl , with long , braided hair , comes charging down the aisle .

"Ivy ! Me misses you !" , Brenna yells back . "Puts me down , Daddy !"

I set her down , and the two little girls immediately grab each other in an enthusiastic hug . After a few seconds , they let go , and Ivy looks over and says , "H'lo , Miss Fi !"

"Hello , Ivy . Where's your Daddy , hon ?", Fianna responds .

"Him's over there , somewheres ." , she says , waving her hand in the direction she came from , and we hear a man's voice calling her name .

"She's over here , Jeff !" , Fianna calls out , and a tall , muscular guy , with a slight limp , comes around the corner .

"Baby girl , you can't do that !" , he tells Ivy . "You might get lost . And you know that Daddy can't run like you do anymore ."

"But I'm not losed , Daddy , I finded Bwenna and Miss Fi ! And there's Miss 'Kaela and Mr . Wyan , and ... , I doesn't know who him is ."

"You does too , Ivy ! " , Brenna says . "Hims my Daddy ! I telled you , him don'ts wive far away no more , and him comes to sees me , 'member?"

"H'lo , Mr . Bwenna's Daddy ." , she says , looking up at me .

"Hello , Ivy , it's nice to meet you , and my name is Ashley ."

"See , Daddy , I'm wasn't losed ! And that's Mr . Ashwey ."

He introduces himself as Jeff Murdock , and as he steps closer , I realize that the limp is caused by the fact that he has a prosthetic leg . He looks to be a few years younger than me , probably not much older than Fianna , with short , reddish - blond hair , a goatee , and several tattoos .

"I know that guy from somewhere ." , Ryan whispers to me . "I just can't place him right now .

"Sorry to interrupt , everybody ." , he says . Then , turning to Fianna , he says , "But since we have , do you think I could ask a favor ? Is there any chance I could leave her with you for a few minutes while I go next door and try to find her a Christmas present ?"

"Of course you can , Bren will be thrilled ." , Fianna tells him . "We're going to go to the back and see Santa in a few minutes , so she can come along , too . But the only thing next door is the Walgreen's , Jeff ."

"Yeah , I know ." , he says , flushing slightly . "But they're having a sale this week on some of their toys , buy one , get one free . That way , she can have a little more for Christmas . Things are a little tight right now , my job went under , and I haven't lined up another one yet ."

"Yeah , I heard . I'm sorry , Jeff ." , she answers . "You go ahead and do your shopping , and I'll watch her until you're done ."

He walks off , and we head toward the back of the store with the kids , to get in line for them to see Santa . As we're waiting , I hear Brenna and Ivy chattering away , and Ivy says something that catches everyone's attention .

"I wishes I could has something else but peamnut butter for dinner , but we don'ts got nothing else 'til we go see Nanny and Pop- Pop tomorrow for suppers ."

Damn ! I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have anything to feed Bren except peanut butter . I feel for the guy . I look at everyone else , and say , "Okay , then , we're all having lunch at my place . We already had it planned , and we're inviting them so the girls can play a bit longer ."

"Absolutely right !" , Ryan says , and Miki nods . I'm almost shocked , I know that Fi said she agreed to be civil , but I didn't figure that she'd want to actually come to my house .

The girls get their turn with Santa , and I pay for a picture for each of them , and Jeff comes back ,carrying a plastic Walgreen's bag , just as Ivy climbs down from Santa's lap ,

"Daddy , Santy gives me a candy !" , Ivy exclaims , waving a candy cane at him .

"That's good , baby , you can have that for dessert tonight ." , he responds .

"Hey , Jeff , I was just thinking about something ." , I say . "We're going to head over to my place for lunch when the ladies finish their shopping , so why don't you two join us ? Then the girls can hang out a little while longer ."

"That's real nice of you , but I don't want to be any trouble ." , he tells me .

"Dude , if it was any trouble , I wouldn't have asked ."

"Pwease , Mr . Jeff , me wants to play wif Ivy !" , Bren shouts . "Her cans sees my jittar ! Daddy teaches me how's to play it !"

" I wants to play with Bwen , Daddy !" , Ivy pleads . "Pease say okay ?"

He finally agrees , so we head for the checkout line . As we're waiting in line , I see Fianna pick up a book off of one of the displays and look at it . As I watch , she turns it over to look at the back , then looks into her wallet , and puts it back on the shelf . I move closer to the rack , and make note of the book title , deciding to come back later and buy it for her as a Christmas gift .

They finish up , and everybody gets into their vehicles , heading to my house , going slow enough that we don't lose Jeff and Ivy . When we get there , and everyone gets inside , Brenna and Ivy go to her room to play , while Fianna helps me make lunch . We keep it fairly simple ; chicken salad sandwiches for the grown - ups , and chicken nuggets for the girls , with some ice cream for dessert .

As we eat , Jeff opens up a little , and we find out that he was in the Army , as well , until he lost his leg , and that he'd been hoping to reconcile with his ex , before she died .

"Ivy mentioned her grandparents earlier , is that your folks or hers ?" , I ask him .

He glances over at Ivy , making sure she's not listening , before he says , "That would be my in - laws . My folks haven't spoken to me since they found out I was going out with Sandi . They've never met Ivy , or even acknowledged that she exists , and I try not to talk about them where she can hear . She's too young to understand what a bigot is ."

"How the hell can anybody turn their back on their own kid , let alone their grandkid ?" , Ryan wonders .

"Trust me , it can be done ." , Fianna reminds him . "The only difference is that mine wasn't a bigot , just a self - centered bitch ."

"Sorry , hon , I forgot ." , he says .

"Yeah , but my in - laws are great ." , Jeff continues . "They've always treated me like one of their own , and they're crazy about Ivy . They even said that we can move in with them until I can find work , but I don't want to do that . Sandi's sister has Down's Syndrome , and she still lives at home , so I don't want to put any more work on them if I can help it ."

"What sort of work did you do ?" , Miki inquires .

"I was working for a private security firm , until a couple of my co - workers got stupid and started stealing stuff from the place they were working . After all of the publicity , it made all of us look bad , and people started canceling their contracts , so my boss shut it down ."

"You know , this might be a good thing for both of us ." , I inform him . "It just so happens that I'm in the market for a security guard , and if you can think of somebody who can actually give you a reference , you might fit the bill ."

"Man , if you're actually serious , the manager at the apartment complex I was working at said that he'd vouch for me , if I needed it ."

Ryan looks at him again , and says , "THAT'S why you look familiar ! You worked the gate at Monument !"

"Yeah , you're one of the landscaping guys , right ?" , Jeff responds .

"I actually own the company , but yeah , I am ." , Ryan chuckles . "I've actually got Ernie's personal number , so why don't I give him a call ?"

He dials a number , and switches his phone to speaker . After a couple of rings , a gravelly sounding voice says , "Hello ? Whaddya need , Ryan ?"

"Hey , Ernie ! Actually , there's a guy interviewing for a job with a friend of mine , and he says he knows you . Dude's name is Jeff Murdock ."

There's a slight pause , then he says , "One question , first . Your buddy isn't in construction , is he ?"

Jeff chuckles at that , and Ryan says , "No , it's a security job . Why do you ask ?"

"Because the boy can't pound a nail straight to save his life , and I didn't wanna lie him into a job he wouldn't be able to keep . But if you don't need him to build anything , then hell yeah , I'll vouch for him ! If it was up to me , I woulda kept him on here , but the big boss would rather contract that work out . Then he doesn't have to mess with all of the tax paperwork ."

They talk for a couple more minutes , then he hangs up , and I tell Jeff , " Well , it looks like you've got the job , if you want it ."

"Yes sir , I sure do !" , he exclaims .

"Okay , one thing we need to get straight right now ." I say . "Don't do that , I hate that ! My name is Ashley , not sir ."

"Sure thing , whatever you want !"

"So , why don't you come to the office Monday morning , and we'll get all of your info into the system ." , I tell him . "And , if you want , I think we might be able to arrange a bit of an advance on your pay , so you can get Ivy back into daycare , and make sure she has the best Christmas possible , under the circumstances . You figure up how much you'll need , and I'll cut a check for you . We'll just arrange with payroll to take it out of your checks a little at a time until you're caught up ."

"You'd really do that ?" , he asks . "That's just so great , you have no idea how much I appreciate it !"

"Hey , man , I have a little girl myself , and I know how I'd feel if I couldn't figure out how to give her what I wanted her to have ." , I say . "So , just do your job , that's all I ask ."

I give him the address and phone number of my office , and set up a time for him to come in , and he and Ivy leave shortly afterward , with the girls being totally stoked at the news that Ivy will get to come back to daycare .

As they walk out the door , Ivy turns around and flings her arms around my legs , saying , "Fank you , Mr . Ashwey , you is very nice mans ! Now Daddy don't has to be worry no more !"

"You're welcome , little one ." , I reply . "You have a Merry Christmas , okay ?"

And the most surprising part of the whole day happens as I watch them walk to their car , when I hear , from behind me , Miki saying , "Okay , maybe he's not so bad , after all ."

Notes