*Eliza’s POV*

In a happy delirium, I pulled Andy to me for a big, sloppy kiss. I giggled when he broke away to peck my nose. “I love you, and I’m so glad you like blackberries-“

Andy broke into a huge grin. “-Fuck, especially your blackberries!”

We kissed again, more tenderly, until the ‘clack’ of something I’d always feared might happen sent a jolt of panic through me. Andy’s antlers had locked firmly through my horns. We were jammed! “Shit! Do you have a mirror we could use, something, anything reflective?”

I was mortified! Most women that were cursed with horns instead of the more feminine antennae had a much, much more diminutive set than mine, I’d never even heard of this happening during intimacy! I’d always been fearful… Fuck, I was such a freak!

We needed to dress, find someone to help us, pretend we had just been kissing… I tried not to snivel like some weakling, and was shocked when Andy just chuckled deeply, as if this were comical.

I peered up at him, about an inch from my face, breathing his warm breath. “We actually couldn’t have better timing for this. Hold on just a sec, here.”

Andy made a face as though he were focusing, gripped his left antler, and, with a horribly foreign, ripping noise; his antler came clear off his head!

I screamed in horror as Andy dropped his antler, grinning victoriously! His beautiful, noble, detached antler fell a bit, now only held up at an angle by my right horn.

Andy looked mildly concerned, though mostly with managing to work his other antler free, as he sat up a bit. I, being a rational being, continued yelling, pointing at the presumed hole in the left side of his head! Gods! Shitting dick! How the fuck would I get it back on?

Andy smiled confidently at me as he finally got his remaining antler dislodged from my left horn, but I was not appeased. Andy had just torn his fucking antler right off because he was impatient! What the shit was wrong with him?

Determined, I sat up, pissed off as a fucking minotaur, and slung Andy over my shoulder. “You ass! If you die before we get to the Healer’s Tent, so help me, I will follow you, beyond the grave, to kill you again! No one will be able to save you, Second Officer Fuck You!”

I grabbed Andy’s detached antler, on the off chance it would be needed, and stormed out of the shelter. Andy was flailing like a snappy badger, and both of us were completely naked. I had not believed there was time to dress; Andy could have died at any moment from his head wound. Idiot man!

Or so I believed. Andy yanked my hair as vigorously as he could. “Eliza, I give you my word as a Watchman that I am fine! If you wish to spare us the pain of being laughingstocks, please put me down! At the least take me back to the shelter?”

Andy doing his on-my-honor, swearing-of-vows thing stopped me in my tracks immediately. What the fuck was going on, then? Worried, I quickly surveyed the area. We hadn’t made it very far up the path. However, just my luck, we had company.

An affable-looking man with a beard and fluffy hair waved at us as he approached, as though a naked, convicted criminal carrying a nude Officer missing an antler was the most everyday sight in the Forest. He nodded congenially. “An excellent idea! However, my Watch is coming up, and I’m afraid Jake insists on clothing. Damned shame, really. Nothing quite like a fine breeze through the nethers this time of year! Amiright, Andrew?” He grinned affably, nodding at us.

I had no time to decide what to do or say before Andy sprung out of my grasp, managing to land on his feet. I noticed he conspicuously moved to stand in front of me, which made me snicker under my breath. He ignored the friendly Watchman’s awkward question. “Danny! What in the nine hells are you doing down this way so early?”

Danny grinned widely. “Going to meet Ron for a cuppa at the Walls’ kitchens. I’m running a bit late. Ron’s like to be peeved.”

He scratched his beard, thinking for a moment. “Say, Andrew, you’re not really a man much known for showin’ your keister in public. You are running about in the duff by choice, not because you’ve both had your clothes stolen or somach, right? We’re not the same shape at’al, but I reckon, if you’re in need, I could get some string-“

Andy shook his lopsided head. “-No need. Though, could you give me a hand with this?” Andy pointed at his remaining antler.

Danny bobbed his head, and I shrieked when Andy bent over, Danny grabbed hold, sharply twisted, and wrenched it right off! Andy and Danny looked at each other and laughed as Danny handed the antler back to Andy.

Danny nodded vigorously, eyeing Andy’s other antler in my hands. “I see! I think I know what happened-“

Andy slapped his thigh, making his balls and shrunken penis jiggle. “-I know, Eliza was carrying me to the Healer’s Tent!”

They both hooed and hawed some more, as though that were the most ridiculous thing ever. I turned and stalked off, indignant, back to the shelter. Andy could stay and snicker his tight, little, naked ass off at me, and let all the Village girls come and see!

I set Andy’s antler by his dresser. I decided to sleep in my old hammock, alone. My feelings were hurt, and I had just embarrassed the living-

“Eliza?” When Andy saw me lying in my hammock his face fell and his wings drooped.

Andy strode quickly over to the side of the hammock and knelt on the floor. He took one of my hands in both of his, and had a very sincere look on his face, as though he were about to say something very romantic.

However, at that exact moment, Crow dive-bombed from the top of what I figured was the collection of Juliet’s things, and landed with his pointy, little, feline foot directly on my stomach!

“Guahhh!” I exclaimed, flailing and accidentally punching Andy in the shoulder with the hand he had been holding. Less than a second later, Crow rappelled neatly off my stomach and onto Andy’s head.

I was dimly aware of Andy scrabbling with Crow, and turning to both extract Crow and apologize, when Femme landed on my chest. “Foook!” Ugh, she was even heavier!

Before I could react, she was hurtling off of me, in pursuit of Crow, landing on top of him with a yowl, still on Andy’s possibly delicate, hole-filled head! “Nuh!“ Andy pawed at them helplessly; a mighty warrior, done in by his housecats.

I didn’t get an entire protest out of my mouth before Andy fell over under the combined cranial weight of the two plump cats with a thud and a “Heff!” I scrambled to get out of the hammock to help, but my wing got stuck, and I landed on Andy, knocking the wind out of him with a whoosh.

My right wing was still painfully entangled in the hammock, but I ignored it. I could bank it and use it later. Both cats had fled, and I found my nose shoved snuggly in the crook of Andy’s elbow. “Eh, ok? Andy?”

I clambered upwards awkwardly. “Your head?” I found Andy looking at me lecherously! I wrinkled my nose at him in stern disapproval. “What the devil are you doing? You can’t have cats on your head if you’ve got holes-“

Andy smirked at me confidently, putting his arms behind his head. “I’ll look at my sexy, naked woman if I please.” He winked at me raunchily, making me blush.

I shook my head in protest. “What in the nine hells has gotten into you? Why did you tear your bloody fucking antlers off? Have you-“

Andy snorted. “-You think this is bad, just wait! You’ve caused a hormonal spike, Eliza. I don’t have horns, like you, like so may other Fae. I have antlers, and antlers shed regularly.“

Andy licked his lips. “You caused my whole physiology to pop its damned cork early. You know everybody shares strange things with their spirit animals. Well, let’s just say that, um… After a fashion, you’re bringing me into rut. And off-schedule. Blame yourself for being such a fox.”

My eyes damned fucking near popped right out of their sockets. A 'fox?' Andy had been doing just fine in the horniness department… He had a mating season too?

Andy frowned, indicating my wing with a jerk of his head. “Don’t just leave your wing like that, it looks like it hurts. Or do you want me to baby you and save you myself?”

I sniffed at him and wrangled myself free of the stringy deathtrap. When I was through, Andy was still laying on the ground, watching me earnestly. It was uncanny.

He blinked, his cobalt eyes holding just a hint of worry. “Are you still upset? Will you look at the ‘holes’ in my head; see why I was laughing?”

Andy sat up, and for the first time, I saw that he didn’t really have holes… He had two, pinkish-red dishes. He held up his former right antler and pointed to the portion that had attached to his head. “See, this part’s called a ‘burr,’ where it fit right in? Within the next two days or so, I’ll have a new set growing in, probably bigger, and they’ll be a horrible pain in the ass, a huge weakness until they’ve hardened, meaning the velvet is off.”

Andy looked a little sensitive as he went on. “I have no idea how much you know about deer, but most of them take between four and five months to go from nothing to a full set of hard antlers. Mine grow more rapidly; maybe just because they’re smaller. I don’t really know why. In the past they’ve only taken a month or two. The worst is when the velvet comes off. Though, luckily, just like with deer, that only takes a day, it’s still mortifying. You’ll see.” Andy cleared his throat, not seeming to want to really dwell on his impending new set of antlers any longer.

Andy looked at the antler in his hand and sighed. “We need to hide these,” Andy shook the antler in his hand, “they tend to cause problems.”

Andy hesitated. “I usually get talked into giving them away somehow, eventually, but… I won’t give these away. I had them for just over a year. They’re the antlers I had when I met you, so these are different. They’re yours if you want them-“

“-Yes.” I smiled. “I do want them. But right now, let’s go to bed.”

Notes

edit: i finally finished my Chapter in my character book with the Council members thus far!

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so i went to see Otep on the awesome Equal Rights, Equal Lefts Tour, and everyone i saw was awesome!

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i got to the show late, so i missed Damage Overdose entirely (sorry)

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i caught the very last song of Within the Pyre, and they finished strong. it was cool, they were like a bunch of 80s looking metal, long-haired dudes with like a guy that kind of looked like a caucasian gangsta. but you know what, they brought it for sure, no question. there was even a few moments of like, some seriously almost rob halford vocals that impressed me so hardcore, i was like, 'whoa.' i had to throw the horns. well done, gents.
Within the Pyre Facebook

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A World Without: they were like if Cradle of Filth and hardcore had an awesome metal deformed baby that came screaming from the womb of satan and spat unholy filthy metal at you. except they were all dressed like they were on their way to church, which gave an sense of dramatic irony. again, i threw the horns many times.
A World Without Facebook
A World Without Merch/CD

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after getting so excited so many times after the opening bands, i had hoped that the next several openers might suck some, so i could rest, as i'm an old hag in my 30s. no such luck. they were all awesome. now onto the touring bands (non-local)

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Fire From the Gods: An incredibly tall, energetic, rapping frontman (yes, he is black, I am sure many will make much of this), backed by a bunch of metal dudes wearing like led zepplin shirts and stuff, also they rocked so hard, i was determined, absolutely determined to just sit against the wall, but i couldn't! i had to throw the horns for them! well done gents, they were so fucking badass!
FFTG's Twitter
FFTG's Facebook

a video i took of Fire from the Gods

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Doll Skin: i have seen these ladies before. they range in age from 16-19, and i imagine a lot of my readers would dig this band a lot. they really brought it, despite not being super 'heavy' metal, they are awesome and energetic. good work, ladies.
Doll Skin Website
Doll Skin Facebook
Doll Skin Youtube Channel
Doll Skin Instagram
Doll Skin Twitter

a video i took of Doll Skin

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Otep: i feel like i shouldn't have to say anything about Otep. she spat on a mask of Trump, she rocked the shit out of us. the band came out during the sound check and the sound check itself rocked so much, there was a mosh pit. what can i say? Otep is Otep!
Otep Website
Otep Facebook
Otep Merch
More Otep
Otep Instagram

a video i took of Otep playing 'Equal Rights, Equal Lefts'
a video i took of Otep playing 'Rise, Rebel, Resist'