Hanging by a Moment

As she allowed him to help her put away her groceries, Rebel never once told Ashley that she knew exactly who he was. She’d been a fan of the band he was in, Black Veil Brides, for a little over a year, so she’d recognized him as soon as she walked up to him in the grocery store. When he’d told her that the baby he was holding was his daughter, she’d been a bit shocked, but then again, as much as he was rumored to sleep around, she figured she probably shouldn’t be.

Just as they finished putting away her groceries and throwing the plastic bags in the recycling, she heard something in the living room and turned her attention there. She saw the carrier on her couch rocking slightly and, thinking Legacy was awake again, she started toward her couch. Only seeing a dark brown, very fluffy tail peeking out from behind the raised visor told her that it was her little kitty making it rock.

Knowing that Apollo wasn’t declawed, Rebel grabbed a squirt bottle and took aim toward the carrier. The man standing beside her was startled by her actions, trying to pull her arm down since he thought she was aiming for his baby. Being a mother herself, she’d never do anything to hurt the infant, but she’d hose down her cat ten ways to Sunday if it meant keeping her safe. She waited till he was within sight and had no paws on or near the baby, then started squirting him. Startled, the year and a-half-old-cat scrambled to get away, darting down the hall toward her bedroom within moments of being squirted.

Chuckling softly, she put the squirt bottle down on the carrier and turned to a fairly surprised Ashley. Clearly, he hadn’t been expecting a cat to come shooting out from the other side of his daughter’s carrier, but apparently realized she wasn’t going to hurt Legacy, or even squirt her.

“Sorry about that, Ashley,” she chuckled. “I wasn’t trying to hurt Legacy, but Apollo’s not declawed; I didn’t want him accidentally hurting her with his claws.”

“It’s fine, Rebel,” the bassist assured her. “I didn’t realize he was on the other side of her carrier till you sprayed him.”

“I saw her carrier rocking a bit and looked over. His fluffy, dark brown tail gave him away,” Rebel laughed. “He has his temperamental moments when he can be kinda mean, but he was just curious and likely just sniffing her.”

“Still, better to be safe than sorry, and make sure she doesn’t get hurt,” he agreed.

“Exactly. Let’s go check on her and make sure he didn’t wake her up,” she suggested, gesturing for him to follow her.

“Sounds like a plan to me,” Ashley agreed, nodding.

The two of them headed for the living room, where they found that Legacy was awake, but just looking around with as much curiosity as she was sure was eating at her kitty. Chuckling, she pulled the receiving blanket she’d tucked around her away, taking note of the slight grimace the baby now wore.

Wondering what was wrong, Rebel started unbuckling her seat belt, deciding it was best to probably pick her up now before she started crying. The moment she picked her up, she grimaced herself as her nose was assaulted by a stench the likes of which she only smelled when her own daughter, Logan, had both wet and dirtied her diaper. It was pretty obvious that she needed a diaper change, and it made her wonder when the last time she’d had one was.

“Ashley, when was the last time you changed her diaper?” she asked, gently cradling the newborn.

“Um…” he said, blushing slightly as he thought. “I couldn’t figure out how to…”

“Oh, boy…” Rebel groaned softly. “And how long has it been since you found her?”

“Uh…I think it was about ten last night when her mother left her outside my front door,” he answered, clearly embarrassed by his incompetency.

“So easily twelve hours, maybe more, since she was last changed,” she said, doing the math in her head. “All right, she definitely needs a diaper change. Even if it weren’t obvious it’s dirty, a wet diaper’s no good for her, either.”

Without waiting for a response, she headed down the hall to the only other bedroom in the apartment: Logan’s. She still took Legacy’s diaper bag with her since, at six months old, the diapers she already had for her own daughter wouldn’t fit his. Once she was in the room, she gently laid the newborn down on the changing table, cooing to her softly as she set her diaper bag on the floor and started digging through it.

She didn’t realize that Ashley’d followed her till she saw him at the head of the changing table from the corner of her eye. Smiling as she murmured to the baby, she set about unbuttoning her onesie, which was actually soaked from how many times she’d wet her diaper since she was last changed.

Rebel grimaced at the thought of how uncomfortable she must be, how raw her little crotch probably was from being constantly wet. After stripping her onesie off, which she actually showed her father how to do so he could support her head as he lifted it up, she opened the diaper. It was all she could do not to gag at the scent, but especially when she saw just how many times it’d been used since it was put on her. It was no wonder the poor little thing was so uncomfortable and screaming in the middle of the grocery store; she would’ve been, too, if she’d been in undergarments that dirty.

As quickly as she could, she cleaned the little girl’s rear up, being gentle about wiping the excrement from her skin. Dismayed to see her bottom was already turning red, she reached onto the shelf below where she was laying and grabbed the open tube of Destin she used on Logan. She gently smeared it across and between her little cheeks, smiling when Legacy sighed softly. Obviously feeling a bit better now, it made her smile at being able to help her feel better.

“I don’t even have to ask if that feels better, little angel,” she said softly, sprinkling a bit of baby powder on the rest of her crotch.

Legacy smiled up at her, although the expression didn’t last long before it disappeared.

“That’s okay, though; Daddy’s never done this before, so he’s still learning.” Rebel leaned over and gently kissed her forehead before starting to put a fresh onesie on her. “I know it’s just as frustrating for you as it is him, but you have to work together.”

Ashley’d been standing quietly by the head of the changing table, watching what she was doing so he could hopefully learn how to help his own daughter.

“If the two of you work together, it’ll make things soooo much easier for both of you,” she continued, smiling as she gently tapped her nose. “I know because things were so much easier for Logan and I after we managed to start working together.”

“Logan?” the bassist asked, sounding a bit confused.

“My daughter,” Rebel chuckled, looking up at him. “She’s six months old, but I still have to let her dad see her because of the visitation.”

“I’m guessing you didn’t agree to it?” he asked, frowning slightly.

“No, it was forced on me by the courts and our lawyers.” She suppressed a growl at the memory. “Her father’s not a nice guy; actually, she was conceived because he raped me.”

Appalled, Ashley looked like he was about to blow a gasket.

“Unfortunately, I never had any evidence to support my claim; the doctors and cops said that I just liked it rough, which explained away the vaginal and cervical bruising found during my rape kit and exam,” she told him. “Yes, I like it rough, but how would that explain the tearing also found?”

“It wouldn’t. I’ve been with some girls who liked it rough, and while they might’ve been sore, maybe even a bit bruised, I’ve never torn anyone who was a willing participant, no matter how rough things got,” he answered.

“Exactly, but I never could get the cops and DA to see that.” Rebel grumbled softly as she buttoned Legacy’s fresh onesie. “And because I never could prove he was a rapist, that he’d raped me the night Logan was conceived, I couldn’t get him put behind bars, nor could I strip him of his paternal rights.”

“I’m so sorry to hear that, Rebel.” Ashley gently hugged her, seeing that she could clearly use one. “You’ve been through so much more than appearances let on.”

“I don’t talk about it because I don’t want the pity,” she said, sighing. “While it’s nice to have understanding from someone, the pity gets annoying.”

“Oh, I can understand that.” He nodded as he let her go. “While I like being able to talk to someone else who understands how it feels to grow up an orphan because their parents died, I don’t like it when people pity me for growing up like that.”

She said nothing about him confirming that rumor she’d seen on the Net, as he still didn’t realize she knew who he was.

“I’m actually a bit grateful that you shared that with me. You don’t seem like someone to share something so intimate with someone they just met.”

“I’m really not, but you don’t strike me as being any different, either.”

“Yeah. Only my grandparents know what happened to my parents. While my best friends know they died when I was little, they don’t know how they died.”

“You don’t have to tell me, either, if you don’t want to.” Rebel smiled at him reassuringly. “After all, we just met a couple hours ago, and you’ve already told me a pretty intimate detail of your own life by admitting they died when you were young.”

With a smile of relief, Ashley hugged her again before picking up his baby girl. Legacy snuggled against him, gently nuzzling his throat as if forgiving him for his earlier idiocy. He chuckled as the gentle action tickled him a bit, and that in turn made Rebel chuckle. She knew the sensation from all the times her own baby girl would nuzzle her throat, either because she was hungry or sleepy.

Considering that it’d been a couple hours now and she remembered how often Logan got hungry as a newborn, she suggested feeding her again. The clueless man cocked a perfectly-arched brow at her curiously, which definitely bespoke his lack of experience. She chuckled and said that most babies got hungry every couple hours at this age, her theory supported when the baby he held tried latching onto his throat and suckling greedily. When he started to pull her away, she gently stopped him from doing so. Although it was usually ticklish and felt weird, it was better than listening to her cry while a bottle was made.

Ashley clearly looked a bit surprised by her suggestion, but shrugged and let the baby stay where she was. He fought laughter as her hungry suckling tickled him, which made Rebel laugh as she prepared her bottle. She could’ve gotten a bottle of the breast milk she’d pumped for Logan, but she chose not to.

Thinking as she warmed the formula slightly, she decided she’d made the right decision. This man may not want her feeding his daughter her breast milk, and even if he did, if it wasn’t fed to her on a regular basis, it might tear up her poor little tummy. She didn’t want to take that risk, especially considering that it wouldn’t feel too good to the infant who couldn’t tell them when she was uncomfortable. Within moments, the microwave beeped, drawing her from her thoughts as it let her know it was done.

“You wanna try feeding her yourself this time?” she asked Ashley, quickly testing its heat on her wrist.

“I haven’t had any problems with feeding her,” he answered, nodding.

“Let’s go sit down in the living room, then,” Rebel suggested, handing him her bottle.

Nodding again, the bassist followed her back into the other room, wincing slightly at the heat of the plastic. “You sure this isn’t too hot for her?”

“I tested it on my wrist,” she chuckled as they sat down. “The bottle itself might feel too hot, but the formula’s not.”

“If you’re sure…” Ashley trailed off, sounding a bit skeptical. “I mean, I know your daughter’s older than mine, and you’ve apparently babysat in the past, but…”

“Ashley, I completely get it.” She gently rubbed his arm in a reassuring manner. “I understand wanting nothing but the best for her, and wondering just what can and can’t hurt her. It’s all part of being a parent.”

Sighing softly, he smiled at her, clearly at least a bit reassured by her words.

“Trust me, I’m actually worried beyond belief about Logan; I’m terrified her dad’s hurting her every moment she’s with him.” Rebel took a deep breath. “If she comes back home with so much as a hair outta place…”

Seeing the look in her eyes made Ashley realize that she really loved her daughter, that she’d stop at nothing to ensure her health, safety, and happiness.

“Sorry, I’m not trying to turn violent on ya,” Rebel apologized sheepishly.

“Don’t worry about it, Rebel,” he said. “She’s only been in my life for about twelve hours, but I feel the same way about Legacy.”

Smiling, she watched at the little baby continued draining her bottle until she was halfway done. Just as she had earlier, although the bassist hadn’t noticed, she gently took the bottle from her, which ticked her off a bit. Confused, the man she’d dreamt of meeting for the last year or so made no move to stop her when she took her from him.

Rebel gently held the baby against her shoulder, cupping her hand slightly as she brought it down on her back. This startled her father a bit, as he thought she was hurting her judging by how loud the blows sounded. She assured him that she wasn’t hurting Legacy, that the blows merely sounded louder than they actually were due to how she had her hand cupped. That drew a sigh of relief from him, a smile ghosting across his lips as the baby in question let out a soft burp.

“Wow…she burped faster than I’ve been able to get her to,” he said, sounding awed.

“It’s because of how I cupped my hand,” she chuckled. “I know it probably made it sound like I was hurting her, but it actually helps a baby burp faster.”

“But why’d you do it halfway through her bottle?” Ashley asked, frowning as she started to fuss slightly.

“Because it’s nicer to a baby,” she told him. “Yeah, it’s perfectly fine if you wait till they’re completely done, but that allows more air to get trapped in their bellies.”

“And burping them halfway through cuts down on that,” he said, a light bulb clearly turning on in his head.

“Bingo, Ashley,” Rebel chuckled, gently handing the baby back to him.

It wasn’t long before Legacy had completely drained her bottle, and it was time to burp her once again. With all of the air out of her little belly, she suggested changing her again before they headed over to Ashley’s place to unload his groceries. Nodding, considering how he’d accidentally neglected her, he followed her down the hall to Logan’s nursery again.

She stood back and observed as he changed his daughter’s diaper, chuckling as she straightened and tightened it a bit when he was done. Considering that it was the first time he’d ever changed a diaper, he didn’t do half bad after watching her, and she let him know so. He sighed with relief, although he was still a bit embarrassed by doing it slightly wrong, before he picked Legacy up again. By now, with a dry diaper and a fully belly, she was ready for another nap.

By the time they got back to the living room, the baby was sleeping soundly once again as she used her daddy’s shoulder as a pillow. He chuckled softly and made sure she wouldn’t wake up, then gently laid her in her carrier. He was just as gentle about buckling her seat belt, almost as if he was afraid he’d break her if he didn’t use the utmost care. Seeing a man with a baby never failed to warm her heart, though, as long as he actually cared.

Once the baby was strapped in, Ashley gently tucked her receiving blanket around her to make sure she didn’t get cold. As an after thought, she ran back to her daughter’s nursery and grabbed another from her little dresser, thinking it was a good idea to keep her shielded from the bright, Southern California sun. The bassist cocked a brow at her curiously as she spread it out over the visor of the carrier, which he’d raised again. Chuckling, she told him that while the visor offered her some protection from the sun, the thin blanket would help with that endeavor.

“And before you ask, she’ll be able to breathe just fine,” Rebel reassured him. “I used to, and still do this with Logan, and she’s just fine.”

“Oh, good,” he sighed, clearly having been worried for a moment.

“Now, let’s head on over to your place to drop off your groceries,” she said.

“Speaking of…do you wanna just ride with me, or take your own car?” Ashley asked curiously.

“It’s up to you since I’m fine either way,” she answered.

“Hmm… Let’s just take my car, and I’ll bring you back home later,” he said. “Saves gas that way.”

Nodding, she allowed him to lead the way out, squatting down to tell Apollo bye since he decided to show himself again before locking up. The man at her side couldn’t help complimenting the cat’s beauty, making her chuckle as she locked her door. He was definitely a beautiful little guy, and too well he knew it.

With her front door locked, Rebel followed him down to his car, chuckling as he put up a bit of a fight to get the carrier locked into its base. It was just something that took practice to be able to do as well as she did, so she couldn’t blame him. Besides, she remembered all too well from when Logan was a newborn how much she struggled at first before she got the hang of it. With time and practice, he’d get the hang of it, too, and not have to put up as much of a fight.

Once Legacy was settled in his back seat, Ashley gently closed the door before moving up to the passenger door to open it for her. Smiling her thanks, she gently climbed into the front seat, immediately sitting the seat up a bit as he closed the door. She’d never really been able to tolerate leaning back too much for too long, but after hurting her back in a car wreck when she was twenty-one, she really couldn’t.

Rebel was buckling her seat belt when he opened the driver’s door and slid into the seat as gently as he could. She looked up at him as he closed his door and buckled his own seat belt, chuckling when he cranked the car and she immediately heard Mötley Crüe’s Dr. Feelgood. She hoped he wouldn’t play that particular song in front of Legacy until she was old enough to understand its meaning because, although she’d never deny it was an awesome song, it was a bit questionable for a child to listen to. Then again, this wasn’t her daughter, and she couldn’t tell him how to raise her.

Within moments, he’d pulled out of the parking lot to her apartment complex and was headed toward West Hollywood. She didn’t exactly live in East LA, considering how notorious it was for its crime rate, and had been for years. Still, it was pretty obvious that he lived a decent distant from her, but that was okay with her. Right now, it was his gas they were using, which relieved her since she didn’t have very much money to her name, so she didn’t care quite as much. She still felt a bit bad about making him pay for the gas they used since he was about to have to shell out quite a bit of money for Legacy, but it was better to replace the gas in one car rather than both. That was really the only thing that made her feel any better about that thought.

It wasn’t long till Ashley slowed down to turn into the parking lot of a fairly upscale apartment complex, at least when it was compared to her own. He continued down to the third building before pulling into a parking spot, his feet depressing the clutch and brakes as he pulled the gear shift into Neutral before killing the motor. They both started unbuckling themselves, and Rebel knew that once his groceries were unpacked and put away, they’d head out on their excursion. She wasn’t worried about being with him in the least; she was more worried about encountering excited fan girls who didn’t notice or care about Legacy. She hoped nothing happened, but only time would tell.

Notes