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I Will Love You Forever

I Love You

Andy and I rode in a taxi to the hotel. I paid the driver and Andy got out of the cab. He walked around the cab and opened the door for me. I got out and he picked me up then carried me to the elevator. He put me back on my feet in the elevator and kissed me. The doors of the elevator opened and we walked to our room. We got in and found Ashley and Vannah watching Adventure Time. Ashley turned around and said, "Well then. The lovers are back home. How was the date did Andy use his manners?" I laughed and Andy snarled. I replied to Ash, "The date was perfect! Andy used his manners and carried me out if the car after opening the door for me." "Oh is that right," Ashley said to Andy while raising his eyebrows. "Yes it is," replied an annoyed Andy. I smiled and hugged him. I said, "I'm getting in the shower again then I'm going to bed. I'm very tired." Andy nodded and laid down in his bed. I took my shower and thought of him. How much I loved him and how much he loved me. After I got out I changed into Andy's Batman onsie and got into bed with him. He held me tight and close. I fell asleep to the sound of his heartbeat and his slow and steady breathing.

Notes

Comments

@Purdy_Girl_1
I will but going to add more suspension and I won't rush everything.

bvbarmyforlife bvbarmyforlife
4/26/15

Please make another one like this

Purdy_Girl_1 Purdy_Girl_1
4/11/15

@BVBfangirlqueen
Thank you! I thought everything was moving a little fast too. I will try to improve that in my next story. XD

bvbarmyforlife bvbarmyforlife
4/10/15

A little more description and suspense would be nice too. And maybe some more dramatic wording? :) Just suggestions. This is a really good idea and I like how it cautions people about internet-dating being dangerous.

BVBfangirlqueen BVBfangirlqueen
4/10/15

I don't want to make this criticism I just want to add some 'constructive' with this comment because you have a really good idea here. My only problem with it was that it was a little... naive... for lack of a better word. The dialect and some of the actions were too fast and a little too fluffy to be realistic. I think you just need to get the swing of things ad you'll be a top-notch writer. :)

BVBfangirlqueen BVBfangirlqueen
4/10/15