An Angels Last Fall

The club was as expected, only this time I tried to stay by Andy’s side. He kept grabbing my wrists to dance with him but it was too much for me. I agreed to one dance, in which I had fun, but then Ashley threw up. It was decided I would drive since their plans were not thought out.

“Are you sure?” I asked Andy, trying to hand him back his car keys. “We can call CC or someone to come and get us.” I knew my driving was terrible and it would be a miracle if we made it home in one piece.

“It’s 2am, Ciarra, CC will not be conscious enough to even put his shoes on.” Both Andy and Ashley laughed. We were standing in the parking lot next to Andy’s black car. Ashley hung over Andy’s shoulders. Although Andy looked like we has about to fall over any minute as well. “Just drive, baby! I believe in you!” Andy threw one fist in the air and helped Ashley into the back seat.

I sighed and went over to the driver side and started the car after Andy had closed his door. “I don’t know Andy…” I said my foot heavily on the break even though it was in park.

Andy leaned over and kissed my cheek, he backed away and held onto my hand, which was holding on tight to the steering wheel. “The left pedal is the break, the right one is go.” He chuckled. “Now onward!” He took his hand off of mine and threw both hands in the air.

I sighed again and put the car in reverse. I drove much slower than most of the cars behind me wanted but neither Andy nor Ashley could complain. They mostly spent the ride talking to each other, trading small pieces of paper with drawings on them and giggling like children. I smiled to myself and tried to keep my eyes on the road.

To my surprise we had, in fact, made it home in one piece. Ashley fumbled in his pockets for the key before finally I found the spare they kept inside a tree. Ashley wasted no time in flopping onto the couch and snoring his way to dream land. I, with Andy, made my way upstairs. I let him put his arm around me to keep him from falling on his face from the steps. From one thing I did know about alcohol was that he had drank way too much of it.

I had got him into his room and laid him down on his bed. I took off his boots for him as he laid an arm over his face and giggled. “I remember one time I got so drunk and I stumbled home and my mom had to take my shoes off for me.” He slurred.

I just looked to him as I made my way toward the head of his bed. “You want any water?” I asked.

Andy shot up and stood in front of me. His mood had changed, his eyes had grown…hungry. He shook his head and bit his bottom lip. “No…please don’t.” I thought to myself as he pressed his lips hard against me. Soon his hips followed suit, that was where I stopped it.

“A-Andy…” I pushed him away, hips first.

“What’s wrong?” He asked walking toward me.

I put a hand on his chest to keep him away. “I’m not going to have sex with you, let alone while you’re drunk. Just get back in bed and go to sleep.” I couldn’t even look him in the eye. He managed to wrap his arms around my waist and plant soft kisses on my neck. I arms were cramped from trying to push him away. “Stop!” I finally yelled.

Andy backed away sharply and stared at me. The hunger was disappearing. “I just,” he looked down at the ground. “I want you.” Sorrow filled his face.

I took a deep breath and walked to him to hug him. I rested my chin on his shoulder as he let his arms hang loosely around my waist. “I’m not ready to have sex, Andy. I don’t know if I’ll ever be.” I mumbled, my jaw on his shoulder still. I was an angel, and it was stupid of me to think that this wouldn’t happen. I pulled away from the hug and tucked my hair behind my ear. “Go to sleep, Andy.”

He gave me a big smile and kissed my cheek before climbing in his bed. “Wait, stay?” He asked as I walked to turn his light off and close the door.

I turned back to him and shook my head. “Not tonight.”

Andy gave a frown I would except from a 4 year old and then smiled. “Goodnight then, Ciarra!” He flopped his head on his pillow and I placed a finger on his light switch.

“Goodnight, Andy.” I was about to close the door when he spoke up again.

“Wait!” I peaked my head back in to see the sorrow return. “I-I love you.” He gave a weak smile.

I gulped and almost panicked. “Goodnight.” I quickly closed his door and leaned against it.

He was drunk. He didn’t know what he was talking about. But why did I panic? There was a part of me that told me I loved him. But I couldn’t tell for sure. Maybe it was the angel in me telling me to watch my morals.

I was taking a whole new stand with the way I was acting toward him. I shook my head and walked toward my room. Mindlessly changing into pajamas and crawling into bed as my mind spinned. I had to end it. There was no other choice.

Notes