Escaping Grace

No!
No no no no no ---- it couldn't end like this.
I couldn't let him go. Not now.
I ran after him. I flung the door open and took off for the stairwell.
"Andy!" I cried, and he turned just as he started to go down the last set of stairs.
I tripped as I tried to hurry, and Andy turned immediately, grabbing me before I splattered my face on the ground. I hit his chest hard, and then wrapped my arms as tight as I could around him, burying my face in his shirt.
"Don't you leave me," I clutched at him. "Don't you leave."
"Leah ---."
"My mom, she gave me the scars." everything started to tumble out. "When I decided to leave, she, she didn't want me too, and she was so mad, and she wouldn't s-stop hitting me. And no one stopped her."
I couldn't let him leave, not like this. I would tell him anything. Just so he didn't leave.
"She had a belt and the buckle --- he was there, and h-he knew but no one helped me. They were so mad at me. But I-i didn't d-do anything wrong and, and I had to l-leave. I had to go." I sobbed, my eyes squeezed shut. "I had to get away. I didn't want to hurt any m-more."
"Leah," Andys arms were tight around me. "Shh. I'm sorry. Please. I'm sorry, don't cry, I'm so sorry," His hand cradled the back of my head against his chest, stroking my hair. "God, please, shh, it's okay now."
"I n-never told Vale. Or an-anyone. Don't say anything!" my voice was desperate, and I was shaking. "Please."
Andy didn't say anything, just pressed his lips into my hair.
We stayed like that for a few minutes, completely silent, and I let my tears trickle down into nothing.
I hated thinking about it, it brought back all my old fears. Dr. Roma didn't even know about it.
I had never told anyone.
But I loved him.
And I didn't want him to go.
I heard a door slam upstairs, and after a moment pulled away from him. I hastily mopped at my face, staring down at his gray t shirt as the person walked by us, sending us a curious glance. I kept my gaze averted to the stairs until I heard the outside door slam.
Now was the awkward part.
I took a step back up the stairs, my face starting to redden with humiliation. How could I have told him that? Now he'll pity me, look at me differently then he did before. It would never be the same. I wouldn't be the same Leah he pictured when he thought of me.
I twisted my t shirt hem anxiously between my fingers.
That was the darkest secret I possibly had. When I woke up freaking out at night and needing my meds, she was what I dreamed of. I couldn't get away from my fear of her, and Romochka --- he hadn't stopped her and he had been there.
My lips trembled again as a new wave of tears threatened me. No one had helped me.
"Leah, angel, it's okay," Andy gently lifted my face up, his face stricken. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I --- I never thought it was anything like that. Shit," he muttered, brushing my damp hair out of my eyes.
I sniffled, and wiped at my face hastily. Vale should be back any minute, and this wasn't a sight I wanted her to see.
"I didn't want you to leave," I mumbled, studying the tear stains on his shirt. "Not like that. I --- I'm sorry."
"Don't be sorry. It's okay. I'M sorry --- I'm such an asshole," he tugged me back to him amd hugged me again. "I'll never ask again, I swear. I'm sorry."
"V-Vale will be back soon," I said after a few minutes. "She only left for the store. I don't ---."
"Let's get back to the apartment," Andy took lead, turning me around and hustling me back up the stairs and making sure I didn't fall when I stumbled.
We stepped over to the door, and I tried to turn the knob.
Uh oh.
I tried again. It was locked.
"I'm guessing you don't have your keys."
"Or my phone." I admitted, even more embarrassed now. I had run out so quick I hadn't realized realized the door was going to lock behind me.
Well, shit.
"Come on. Let's go back to my place. I'll call CC so he can tell Vale, okay?"
Eh.
"Okay," I said after a moment. I didn't really have much of a choice now.
I just hoped I hadn't just ruined everything.

Notes

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