Escaping Grace

I should never have left bed, I thought, leaning over the toilet.
I think I was done spilling my guts, but I felt so sick. All of a sudden, too.
I staggered to my feet, and to the sink. I glanced at myself, then grimaced. My skin looked sallow, and I was sweating. I never sweated. Ever.
"Leah? Are you okay?" Vale knocked on the door.
"Fine," I called. Please don't come in, I thought. Leave me alone.
"Honey, the show starts in fifteen minutes."
Oh great. "Okay. I'll be out." At least I'd gotten halfway dressed.
I stared at my reflection. I looked awful, like usual. My hair was a mess and my crappy attempt at makeup was smeared. I'd pulled on some baggy clothes so I looked like a hobo.
I pressed my hands over my face. I didn't want to perform. I wanted to cry. But I had to perform, I couldn't let everyone down. I had to sing. I could sing. I wasn't awful.
God, my head hurt. I took a deep breath, then stepped out the door.
"Leah, you look really sick," Vale hovered over me. "You need to go to the doctor."
"No, I'm okay," I wheezed, and leaned down slightly. Okay, breathe in, breathe out. I could do that. It was the words that became an issue.
"Come on," Clarke took my hand, "I'll call one of the paramedics here."
"No," I waved my hand. "I can perform."
"No, you're not." Vale shook her head. "We're going back to the hotel."
"No," I straightened and forced myself to glare. "I'll perform, then go, okay? I won't have a little virus stop me from performing and let everyone down."
Her look said no, but I wasn't budging.
"I'm going to get Andy," she muttered.
I scowled. "Get him, it won't change my mind and you know it."
She glared at me.
"You guys! Five minutes and you're on. You need to move to the curtain," the stage manager announced from the door, and then promptly disappeared.
Right. I stalked to the door, leaving them all to hurry after me. We made it to the curtain relatively safe, though I was breathing hard by the time we got there. Before anyone else could harp at me, the manager was motioning us on stage, and I took off quickly.
The crowd cheered as we appeared, and I wrapped my clammy hands around the mic to steady myself. I glanced back at Vale, and she gave me a worried look. I sent her what I hoped resembled a reassuring smile, then turned back to the crowd.
Their faces swam in front of my eyes, but I forced myself to stand still. I wouldn't let my fans down. They'd paid a lot of money to be here, and we'd traveled ten hours of awful traffic and poker games to perform for them. I wouldn't let that all be in vain.
The music started, and I sucked in a breath.

"Baby, I don't believe in forever,
But you're gonna make me change my mind. "

I had never been so grateful to be done with a performance. We all took a bow, Nate and Vale clutching my hands. They kept a tight grip as they drug me off stage, and I leaned down gratefully when we were out of the limelight.
I braced my hands at my knees, trying to regulate my breathing like I had beem taught. I tried to think of what had made me so sick, but I hadn't even had a chance to eat anything more than a bagel today.
my mind felt sluggish, and I frowned.
Something was going to have to give before I had a tantrum, and I as bad as I felt I knew it was coming. I straightened, and blew my breath out.
The hotel sounded nice about now.
I glanced over, then grimaced. Vale was literally dragging Andy by his arm. She shoved him toward me with narrowed eyes, then turned to say something to her boyfriend.
Ugh. Butt. I shook my head, wishing I could delete that sight.
"What is going on?" Andy sounded annoyed as he stepped up to me, and I shook my head.
"Vale is over reacting is all," I muttered, my voice scratchy. My throat was killing me.
Andy hesitated. "Leah, are you okay? Did you get sick or something?"
I blew my hair out of my face in aggravation. "I'm fine. There's no need for everyone to keep fussing."
"You shouldn't have went on if you're that sick!" he started, and I wanted to out my hands over my ears so I wouldn't have to listen anymore. I just wanted to curl up and be left alone, not attacked by everyone at every turn!
"Andy, stop it! I don't want to hear any more!"
"Leah, I'm serious. You're going to the doctor in the morning, no questions asked, do you understand me?"
I bristled. Oh, did I understand? He wasn't my boyfriend, or my father, and I'd be damned if I let him speak to me that way.
"No, I'm NOT going." I scowled up at him. It was dark back here, but I'm pretty sure my expression was still discernable.
He glared down at me. "Babe, you need to take care of yourself better. You shouldn't have performed tonight, I shouldn't have let you. It's not been long since ---."
"Stop trying to baby me constantly! I dont need your help or any of theirs, got it? You can't tell me what to do, Andy, you're not my fucking boyfriend and you never will be!"
He looked like I'd slapped him.
I glared at him, and his jaw clenched.
I'd just really pissed him off.
He didn't say another word, just walked away from me.
I didn't bother to watch him go, just went straight to the dressingroom. I grabbed a jacket and my phone and purse, and Vale grabbed my arm as I started to run out.
"Where are you going?" she demanded.
"To the hotel."
"Let one of us go with you then. Danny!"
I grimaced. Danny had been avoiding me all night, and now he was going to escort me to the hotel?
It was definitely a silent journey. We didn't speak to each other the entire way, and I was on the elevator and in my room before he could even get out of the taxi.
I tossed my things down angrily on the bed. Why the fuck did Andy even care? I was so done with being smothered!
I fell back on my bed, and I heard my pills shuffle as I did. I frowned, picking them up and looking at the prescription. It was the same one I had been getting for years.
But something just wasnt right, i needed to call someone about this. The pharmacy would be closed at this point.
I sat up, and called my doctor.
"Roma," her exhausted voice answered right before I was about to hang up. She'd given me her number when I'd become a serious patient, amd it was rare I actually called her out of hours. And I knew it was like nearly eleven but I hoped she wouldn't mind.
"Hi, Dr. Roma, it's Leah Kabinov."
"Leah?" I heard shuffling. "It's been quite some time since you've called me. What's the issue?"
Down to business as always.
"There's something wrong with my pills, I think. They're not working right."
"Not working right how?"
I chewed my lip. Was it really the pills, Leah? Or did you have a virus? I still felt quesy now, but I was over the top angry and I wasn't usually like this.
"Leah?" Dr. Roma prompted.
"Well, I don't know if I had a virus or not, but not long after I took the pills I was sick. Headache, throwing up, I was dizzy," I hesitated.
"Any rashes or itchiness? Are you overly emotional or lack thereof?"
"Overly. So very overly. And no rashes that I've noticed."
"Hmm." I hated it when she made that thoughtful sound.
"Leah, take one of your pills out and look at the words or numbers on it for me."
"Okay," I poured one out in my hand and squinted. I read her off what it said, and There was a brief moment of silence.
"Do NOT take anymore of those!" she burst, and I jumped.
"Those are not the pills I prescribed to you. You're having an allergic reaction to them," she called them a name I couldn't pronounce. "If you remember correctly we tried them on you once and they did the same thing. Someone must have mixed up the medication. I want you to see me first thing in the morning."
"I can't, I'm out of town at a concert. I won't be able to be back until late tomorrow."
"Then come see me late tomorrow," she sounded serious. "Our pharmacy will get you the correct medication, I don't care what time it is. You need to start taking it as soon as you get home to help combat the reactions of," she said their name again.
Great. "Okay, I'll see you tomorrow then but really it'll be between six and ten tomorrow before I---."
"You call me when you get to the city and I'll meet you at my office."
"Thanks, Dr. Roma."
We hung up, and I blew my breath out. Well, that made me feel somewhat better; I wasn't going crazy. I picked at my shirt uncomfortably.
I could feel my anger deflating. God, poor Andy. I think I'd really blew up on him. I needed to apologize immediately, but I didn't know if their show was over yet. I shouldn't have run off like that; I'd probably ruined it for Danny too.
I curled up on the bed. I could give it until twelve then I could call. Or text. Or maybe wait till morning...
When it hit twelve, I called, but only once.
It rang a moment then went straight to voicemail.
So he was really mad at me then.

Notes

Well, that didn't end well for Andy and Leah.