One Last Kiss

“Oh, Daddy.”

With tears in her eyes and streaming down her face, Legacy crawled into her daddy’s lap the same way her mama used to do and wrapped her arms tightly around him. Andy wrapped his arms around her shoulders just as tightly, his mascara and eyeliner long since gone from the tears he’d shed as he recalled those wonderful and happy, yet all too short times with his husband and recounted the full tale.

His death had been so hard on him, probably harder than it would’ve been because not only had he watched his sweetheart draw his final breath, if only in his mind’s eye, but he’d died in his arms. At least Ash was happy upon his death, knowing that their daughter, his pride and joy, was safe and well cared for with his husband. Not only that, but the older man had gotten his deathbed wish, that one last kiss he’d begged for, even as the implement of his death remained buried in his chest. To top that off, he’d died in his husband’s arms, without a doubt his most favorite place in the world.

Somehow Andy’d been able to pick up the pieces of his shattered heart, most of which went in the ground with his deceased love when they buried him a week later. He recalled all too well how sweet and serene Ash had looked in his casket at the funeral, lying there with his arms crossed over his waist and holding his favorite flowers, black and crimson roses and a tiger lily, as if he’d open his eyes, sit up, and yell, “Gotcha! I’m not really dead! And Andy, my Batman and prophet, I love you so much!”

“I-I l-love y-you so m-much, Legacy,” Andy sobbed, burying his face in her hair the same way he’d used to do to his husband.

“I l-love you j-just as m-much, D-Daddy,” she sobbed in response, tightening her grip on him.

They sat in silence for a short time longer, willing their tears away enough to speak without choking up and starting to sob all over again. Legacy had known that just looking at her hurt him, that she’d looked identical to her mama with the exception of her eyes and skin tone. Now she understood that, aside from losing the man he’d loved more than life itself, his dying in his arms made it ten times worse. She was glad to know that her mama’d been happy the moment he drew his last breath, if only because he’d died in the arms of the one he loved most, but she knew why her daddy was so protective of her now, too. She could’ve been killed that day instead, yet her mama’d made the ultimate maternal sacrifice and laid down his life instead.

“I know I’ve hurt you many times over the years by pulling away from a hug, or not letting you kiss my cheek,” Andy said quietly, his breathing still shaky. “Or even because I refused to look at you. But it’s not because I never loved you; I’ve always loved you more than I could scream.”

“I understand, Daddy,” she told him, gently brushing his tears away. “Even if he hadn’t died in your arms, Mama’s death still would’ve made it hard for you to raise me.”

“Ash dying in my arms like that was a good thing, though, in a way.” He paused to attempt steadying his breathing again before he continued. “Not only was he happy when he died, both because he died in his favorite place in the world and got his deathbed wish, but it helped give me closure. I doubt I would’ve been able to handle it as well if I hadn’t seen it for myself, nor granted him that one last kiss.”

“And he really used a Lita Ford lyric to ask you for that?” Legacy asked, looking up at him.

“He sure did. He used the entire lyric, ‘Gimme one last kiss before I die’, from the single Shot of Poison off her 1991 album Dangerous Curves.”

“So the song had no similarities to the way he died?” she asked curiously.

“None at all. But he was trying to be sweet and funny all at the same time, even though he knew he was about to die.” Her daddy gently ran his fingers through her hair, silently noting that it had the same texture as his sweetheart’s.

“No wonder Uncles Jake, Jinxx, and CC, and even Auntie Sammi and Aunt Ella, never wanted to tell me anything about your relationship.”

“Well, they all came to a mutual agreement when us remaining members of Black Veil Brides found it too hard to continue without our fifth Fallen Angel that if anything was said about our relationship, I was the only one who really had that right.”

She kept quiet as they hugged each other again.

“Until now, it was a combination of you being too young to understand, and me finding it too hard to tell you, why I never said anything.” Andy gave her another tight squeeze. “It was hard enough to tell you about him now; I know the longer I waited, the harder it got, but you deserved to know.”

“And you never loved anybody else?” Legacy asked.

“Other than my parental love for you, never. I was so in love with Ash—and to be honest, I still am—that I knew I could never love another. Even if it weren’t for what most consider a ridiculous deathbed vow, I made that vow to him, even though I know he’d want to see me happy, even if that meant loving someone else,” he answered sadly.

The moment he closed his mouth, a bright white light lit up the room from the corner opposite from where they were sitting. They both had to use a hand to block it for a moment until it dimmed, as it was so bright that it hurt their eyes. However, once it’d dimmed enough for them to see clearly, they were shocked by the image they saw, almost thinking they were hallucinating because Andy’d finally broken down and agreed to tell her the tale of how they were brought together and later separated.

Standing before them as if he’d never left at all was none other than Ashley Abrocket Purdy-Biersack. He looked just as beautiful as he ever had while he was alive, and other than his image being just a tad transparent, the black wings that sparkled with silver glitter behind him, and his glowing silver halo atop his head, it appeared as if he’d never left. He was dressed in tight, ripped black skinny jeans, one of his many black denim vests that was left open to reveal his infamous “OUTLAW” tattoo, fingerless black leather gloves, and his customary black cowboy boots that he’d never gone anywhere without.

He gave them a sweet, serene smile before slowly making his way over to them, almost timidly as if he didn’t want to scare them. When he was close enough, he reached out a hand to brush his lover’s hair back, startling his love with how solid it felt. He then turned his attention to his beautiful young daughter, who’d grown up to be far more beautiful than he’d ever dreamt since she was the perfect combination of them, and did the same thing to her.

“A-Ashes?” Andy stuttered, his eyes wide in surprise.

“Yeah, Batman. It’s me,” the angel before them said, chuckling softly. “Maybe not in the flesh, but I’m still here. I always have been.”

“Mama!” Legacy cried excitedly. “I knew you’d show yourself to him eventually!”

“I told you I would, sugar,” Ash said, wrapping his arms around her. His ghost was so solid that she was able to return the gesture, even though he appeared slightly transparent.

“What are you talking about, Legacy?” her daddy asked, sounding confused.

“Mama’s been coming to see me since I was really little,” she answered, looking back at him, even though she never stopped hugging her mama. “He refused to tell me much about himself, and definitely refused to tell me anything about your relationship. But he’s been coming to see me for so long that I’ve forgotten how long it’s been.”

“Since the night I died, sugar,” the deceased bassist told her. “I couldn’t really talk to you before you were four or five, other than telling you how much I loved you.” He looked up at his husband. “I didn’t think I’d get that kinda chance; that’s why I told you to tell her how much her mommy loved her before I died.”

“You’ve really been here all these years? And refused to say anything about our relationship to her?” Andy asked.

“Mmm hmm. My wings are black not only because of my personality, but because I saved her once when God was telling me not to.” His chocolate-brown eyes dimmed for a moment. “As not only a mother, but her mother, I couldn’t let Him take her away from you. Not after he took me when he did.”

“Oh, Outlaw.” Tears welled up in the younger man’s eyes once again.

“I always told her that you’d tell her the story of how we met when she was old enough and you were ready. I also refused to reveal that I was still here until you did that because I didn’t wanna feel like I was forcing you to tell her.” Ash gently caressed his cheek. “I always knew you’d tell her eventually, no matter how much it hurt you.”

“I miss you so much, Ashes. I miss being able to hold you in my arms, especially at night when I’m trying to sleep,” his lover told him, returning the gesture. “It took me years to be able to sleep through the night without you by my side, and not because of Legacy.”

“I know. We got so used to cuddling up together that it was hard for me to watch you go through that,” he told him, a tear slipping down his cheek. “I wish I were still alive, but we’ll be together again someday.”

“Sometimes I wish that every day.”

“Don’t be saying that, Batman. Legacy still needs you, and it’s nowhere near your time.” Ash gave his lover a stern look. “I know you miss me; believe me, I miss you, too. But you have so much more you can accomplish before you join me on this side of the barrier, if you put your mind to it. I’ve been here ever since I died in my own way, even if you didn’t know it. I might not always show myself, but I’ll still be here for many years to come.”

“You have to go again, don’t you, Mama?” Legacy asked, looking into his eyes.

“Unfortunately. My energy reserves are running low since it hasn’t been long since I visited you.” He gave her a tender smile, the same one he’d given her when she was put into his arms for the first time. “I’ll always be hanging around, even if you don’t realize it. I’ll try to materialize as often as I can so you can see and talk to me, but no promises, okay?”

“Okay, Mama. I love you so much, and…thank you for protecting me, even though it meant your death.” She quickly wrapped her arms around his waist again from where she sat in her daddy’s lap.

“You’re welcome, sugar. You’re my baby, and always will be; I couldn’t have let you die that young if I could help it. I love you that much.” He gently kissed the top of her head.

“Even if I see you as the beautiful fallen angel you are, I’ll be by your side again soon, Outlaw,” Andy said, his basement-deep voice sounding choked up again.

“Not too soon, I should hope, Batman,” Ash chuckled, moving to wrap his arms around him. “You’ve done so well with her since that night. Never give in, never back down.” He gently pressed their lips together in the first kiss they’d shared since his death. “I love you more than I can ever scream.”

“I love you more than I can ever scream, too,” his lover answered, returning the kiss as if he were still alive, rather than an angel standing in front of them.

After ending their kiss, the bassist stepped back and waved to them, a beautiful smile on his equally beautiful face. Andy and Legacy couldn’t help the desire to return his wave, not bothering to shield their eyes as another glowing white light enveloped his image and took him away again. Their eyes were drawn to the corner he’d appeared in, up next to the ceiling, where his spirit rested above them as he restocked his energy reserves.

The years following his death had been so hard for his lover to cope with, especially since looking at their daughter brought back so many memories for him. She couldn’t help that she looked identical to her mama, and even though it’d hurt him greatly, he was glad she did. He never got to see that sweet face before now aside from when he looked at Legacy because he refused to look at pictures of Ash, but now he was kind of glad he hadn’t. No picture could capture the older man’s beauty as well as his actual face, or even the angel of him who’d been hiding in the shadows since he’d died.

It would still take time for Andy’s wounds to heal completely, seeing as they weren’t gaping any longer, but he knew they’d be together again someday. Hearing his sweetheart, his Outlaw and deviant, tell him as much from beyond his grave helped him gain that much more closure, and he wrapped his arms around their daughter. Maybe now he could find it in him to tell her stories of some of the little things he’d done, but for now, they were happier than they’d ever been since Ash’s death, and he wanted to keep it that way.

Notes