Love And Other Drugs

The summer was coming to an end and with it the album that the girls had worked so hard on. They had finished recording, the album was now being sent off for fine tuning and now the girls were standing in the middle of a wheat field, somewhere in Washington state. Luxe had thought they would be shooting their first video for the album in LA and she had been thrilled to get back home.

Instead Alex had come to their last day in the studio, saying that their stay in the North was being extended. Their album shoot had been the day before and it had been nothing short of stressful.

The girls had been inside of the house they were now standing in front of-rundown and filled with ghostly memories-and they had been put through the ringer. Alex was unhappy about every little detail-especially when it came to Luxe. Her blonde hair had been cut and was now only chin length, the newly dyed black tips dark against the pale skin of her neck and Alex had been furious.

Pixie had also changed her hair back to her natural red color, wearing it curly and again Alex had been furious. This band wasn't what he had envisioned. The makeup was getting lighter, the clothes more girly and it wasn't working.

The band was changing-their sound, this record, had a softness to it, but really it was just them trying to figure out where they fit in. Alex had blown up when the girls had shown up on set for the shoot, screaming, throwing things and pulling Luxe to the side to berate her. He had not given her permission to change her hair, why was she wearing such a light colored shirt and what had happened to her eyebrow and septum piercings? She had taken them out, tired of all the maintenance and now she just had her lip and nose ring.

This was Andy's doing, Alex had proclaimed and Luxe had just stood there, taking it all in until finally she was called to set.

The girls had been seated on the dilapidated stairwell, their faces held in grim expressions as the photographer snapped away. Luxe was seated in the middle, of course, with Pixie on the step right above her on her right and then Char was seated on her left. Mads was standing behind them, her tattooed arms crossed over her chest as she leaned up against the banister. Lulu was seated on the floor, her short legs stretched out in front of her, sheathed in a pair of dark skinny jeans.

The cover of their album would be shot today, as it was a one time shoot that would happen once the house behind them had been set ablaze for their video.

The house had once been a lovely little farm house, with large trees surrounding it along with fields that had once grown plants that would feed a family. Now it had been left to rot and then Alex had gotten a hold of it. The house had been gutted to make it easier to burn and as the girls stood in the field outside, they couldn't help but feel bad. The house was a wonderful looking building and in less than five minutes it would be caught on fire and the cameras would roll.

The entire video would be shot in one shot, but then the editing room would be used to cut in scenes of actors that had already been filmed the day before. Luxe looked around, smiling as the girls all strummed at their unplugged instruments and joked around with one another. It had been two weeks since Andy had been with her and Luxe had been living it up in the worst way possible. She and Mads spent most nights out at the local bars, Pixie, Lulu and Luxe also enjoyed smoking up and watching cartoon reruns.

Char had been watching over the troubled singer, but she couldn't be there the entire time and it was apparent that Luxe was determined to ruin her life. Char looked over at the singer, taking in her shorn hair and skinny frame-things were changing and it wasn't all in a positive way. Luxe was holding on to the mic in her hands, the old time metal shining in the fading sun.

They were only a few moments away from starting and Char knew she needed to say something. Slowly she walked through the tall grass, her black boots crunching the dry stalks as she walked towards Luxe.


"This is all kind of crazy right?" Char said and Luxe turned to face her. The singer's light grey eyes were framed with a small amount of makeup and it was kind of refreshing to see all of the girls a little less made up. They had all gotten tired of looking like a band filled with over made girls who could shred. They just wanted people to like them for their talent and less for their looks.

"Yeah, of course leave it up to Alex to make this all completely over the top." Luxe said and the girls shared in a laugh. Alex was the butt of most of their jokes and it was really entertaining most of the time.

"Always the drama queen. So how are you doing?" Char asked as she looked around and then stared at Luxe. It was obvious that the girl was high on something-her pupils were incredibly dilated and she was wobbling slightly. Mads also seemed to be only functioning at half capacity and Char felt her stomach clench.

"Fine. Ready to get back home to LA-of course Andy and the guys will be leaving for the desert a few days after we get back, but it'll be nice sleeping in my own bed again." Luxe said and Char only nodded her head. The guys were finished with their album for the most part and had decided that they were going to film a short movie to go along with the entire production.

"Yeah me too. How're you and Andy doing by the way?" Char asked and Luxe only looked at her best friend. There was a reason for all of these questions and Luxe was beginning to grow suspicious.

"We're good-better than ever. I told you he wrote a song for me...right?" She asked and Char nodded. She had heard all about it from Mads, who was shockingly growing closer and closer to the singer. The girls had not liked one another for a long time-well Mads had dislike Luxe, but now it seemed like they were inseparable.

It didn't feel right.

"Mads told me. That's really sweet Luxe. I'm glad you guys worked through everything-I was worried him being here and seeing you like this was going to cause problems." Char said, truly happy that the couple seemed to be on a good path. Luxe, however, was glaring at her friend and biting down on her lip ring roughly.

"Seeing me like what?" She asked and Char's smile slowly vanished from her black painted lips. Shit.

"Well-um-you know..." Chat stammered and now Luxe was facing her, her arms crossed over her chest-the video shoot forgotten for the moment.


What was Char getting at? What had she told Andy? In her haze Luxe could feel her heart beginning to pound and the sweat had broken out on her brow. She had been careful-so careful- when Andy had been here and she had even held off from using heroin, except for the first and last night of him being here. She had stuck with her Valium and uppers, only taking just enough to keep the edge off and here was Char, pretty much calling her an addict to her face. Luxe glared at the guitarist and noticed that Char was now glaring right back at her.

A call was made for everyone to get to their places, but the girls still faced one another, the air thick between them.


"No, no I don't know. Please-enlighten me." Luxe said, ignoring Alex's shouts to her that she needed to focus. They were getting ready to light the house and he needed that first shot of all of them.

"Luxe-come on. You and I both know you have a problem." Char said, no more sugarcoating in her voice. Luxe felt like she had been punched-how could someone who she shared everything with bring this up right now?

"Char I don't know what you're talking about." Luxe said as she turned away from her bandmate. The crew was walking towards the house, gas canisters in their hands.

"Luxe face it-you're an addict and you need help." Char was right next to her, whispering softly in to her ear, but it wasn't helping. Luxe whipped around, her face held into deep scowl.

"Don't you dare call me that Charlotte." Was all Luxe said before turning around and looking off into the direction of the camera.


A sudden whooshing came from behind them and Luxe knew then that the once beautiful house was now ablaze. The music started up and the girls all around her began to play their instruments, but Luxe stayed still. Finally her voice rang out of the speakers and she lifted her head up, staring right into the camera as she began to sing.

All of the anger she was feeling right now-towards Char especially-would come out on film and Luxe knew that it would make for an intense performance. She got lost in her own words, playing it up to the camera as she would a large audience.

Embers that have drifted away
Long lost memories are fading
Ashes cover lonely graves
where you left me to die

How does it feel to take a life away?
You turned your back on me so easily

You set me on fire, my only home
I let you inside and you watched me burn
you criminal, criminal
It started with a spark, and ended in flames

Nothing here that comforts me
where I was so complete

This had been one of the songs that Luxe had not written-Pixie and Lulu had come to her with it and then the girls had sat down and worked on the music together. It was one of her favorites-it sounded haunted and empty, kind of how she felt most of the time. Sure Andy was in her life and he made her happy, but there was still a void that just seemed to remain, no matter what. As the building burned behind them, Luxe just kept on singing-the fire inside her beginning to fade as her addiction took her over completely.

There was no going back and she was pretty sure she didn't want to.

I still can't believe you could mean so much to me
Are you feeling guilty for throwing the match
or for spilling the gasoline?
And when the smoke had cleared
how quickly you disappeared

You set me on fire, my only home
I let you inside and you watched me burn
you criminal, criminal
It started with a spark, and ended in flames

A tragedy that ends in never speaking your name
You're nothing but a ghost to me

Ashes cover lonely graves
where you left me to die

You set me on fire, my only home
I let you inside and you watched me burn
you criminal, criminal
It started with a spark, and ended in flames

I let you inside, I let you inside

Notes

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