Living on Love

The next month passed by fairly uneventfully, and while things between them were by no means exactly the way he wanted them, Ash was seeing improvement. His lover was getting up with Legacy earlier in the mornings than he had been, and often rushing to see to her needs before he could even get up. He was helping around the house more than he had been, which lightened his workload considerably. He was even helping him come up with bass riffs for their album since, even though he wasn’t the bassist of the band, he played bass, as well as piano, alongside being a vocalist.

It was on the morning of September twenty-first, just a few days shy of two weeks after Legacy turned seven months old, that he woke up feeling bad. He’d been feeling rundown for about a week or so, and figured that all the stress he’d been under for the past few months was finally catching up to him. Since he wasn’t feeling good, he decided that, unless absolutely necessary, he wasn’t getting out of bed today.

His plans of staying in bed and getting some rest were cut short, though, when his stomach began to roil like a hurricane-tossed sea. Knowing what was coming just from the sensation alone, Ash tossed back the covers and darted into the master bathroom, hitting his knees in front of the toilet at the same time he opened the lid. The force of his wretching was enough to bring tears to his eyes and wake Andy, who’d still been asleep when he’d had to jump up and run like a madman like he had.

“Ashes?” his sleepy-eyed lover asked, his voice gritty from just waking up. “You okay?”

The second he opened his mouth to respond, he felt his stomach lurch again, causing him to gag as the wretching continued.

“Oh, sweet Jinxx,” Andy murmured, dropping to his knees beside him. He grabbed his hair and held it back for him while he rubbed slow, soothing circles on his back.

“Ohhhh,” the bassist moaned miserably, falling back against his chest.

“Better now?” he asked, genuinely concerned.

“For now,” he answered, holding his ribs. “I hate throwing up like that. It always makes my ribs hurt.”

“I bet,” the frontman chuckled. “Let’s get you back to bed so you can rest. I’ll go grab a trash can to put by the bed so you don’t have to get up if you don’t wanna.”

“Sounds like a plan to me,” Ash murmured, allowing him to pick him up.

Andy cradled him as gently as if he were a china doll, being extra careful not to squeeze him any tighter than necessary so he didn’t upset his stomach again. In the bedroom, he gently laid him down on his side of the bed, where he curled up into a miserable ball and wrapped his arms around his pillow. Since he was so used to having the younger man spoon him when he was laying down, the frontman moved his body pillow behind him so it would feel as if he were being cuddled, even if he wasn’t there.

With his sweetheart settled, he went and got one of the bigger trash cans from the kitchen and put a fresh bag in it, then returned to the bedroom and set it beside the bed. Ash thanked him softly, pouting at him miserably from where he lay snuggled into their covers. He gently brushed his hair back from his forehead as he kissed it, then started getting dressed.

Confused, the bassist asked what he was getting dressed already for since it was still easily only seven in the morning. Although his words were a bit muffled, Andy called out of the closet that he was gonna run to the store to get him some ginger ale and ginger snaps, if he could find the latter, in an attempt to settle his stomach. The caring gesture wasn’t lost on the older man, and he was actually grateful for it since he knew that the ancient Chinese remedy could very well help him.

Once he was ready to go, he headed to the nursery to get Legacy ready so he wouldn’t be left alone with her while he wasn’t feeling good. That entailed changing her diaper, getting her dressed, and feeding her before he even left the house, as she was no doubt hungry and wet, at the least. Ash settled down in their bed, his stomach still not quite settled itself, as he listened to his boyfriend caring for their daughter. He’d been making improvements over the past month, and this was but one of the little things he’d been doing for him. It wasn’t long after that the younger man came back with the carrier in his hand to tell him bye, then took off to the store and left him to enjoy the peace and quiet.

* * *

“Um, ma’am, can you help me find any ginger snaps?” Andy was asking one of the employees at Wal-Mart a short time later.

“Need the ancient Chinese remedy to help settle someone’s stomach?” she countered, chuckling as she beckoned him to follow her.

“Yes, ma’am. My significant other woke up not feeling so good this morning,” he answered, nodding.

“How old’s your little one?” she asked, gesturing to the baby he held on his hip.

“She’s seven months old. Say hi, Legacy,” he cooed.

The baby girl did her best, flapping her hand at the woman in a gesture meant to be a wave.

“She’s so cute,” the woman laughed, letting her grab her finger. “Could it be that her mother’s pregnant again?”

“What makes you think that?” the frontman countered, knowing it wasn’t outside the realm of possibility.

“Well, after I had my first baby, my husband and I tried to wait,” she chuckled. “Not for the sex itself, mind you, but to have another baby. My daughter was eight months old when I conceived again.”

“Mmm,” Andy hummed thoughtfully. “Maybe, but I don’t know.”

“How long as she been feeling bad?”

“Ashley didn’t wake up sick till this morning.” He paused in thought. “That’s why I’m not sure if this is a sign of pregnancy, or if it’s just a stomach bug.”

“Not to sound presumptuous or anything, but why not go ahead and get a pregnancy test while you’re over here?” she suggested, showing him where the ginger snaps were. “I can help you with that, too, if you like, and you’ll already have one if she decides she needs one.”

“That actually sounds like a good idea,” Andy agreed, chuckling at her assumption that Ashley was a woman.

“Go ahead and get anything else you need from this section so you don’t have to make so many trips,” she advised, waiting patiently.

Nodding, he put the ginger snaps in the cart he’d grabbed on his way in, then headed off to the soda with the woman trailing behind him, entertaining Legacy as they walked, so he could get the promised ginger ale. Once several bottles of that was put in the cart alongside the numerous boxes of ginger snaps, he gestured to the woman to the lead the way to their next destination.

With a smile on her face, she quickly led him toward the pharmacy, then closer to the makeup and feminine care products, which he’d had to buy for his sweetheart a few times, and stopped in front of the pregnancy tests. They, along with condoms, were all in a row next to the tampons and whatnot, so how he’d failed to know where they were before was beyond him, but he shrugged it off. After a moment’s thought, she grabbed one of the boxes that had three in it and handed it to him.

She told him that, based on past experience of hers and several of her close friends, Clear Blue seemed to be the best and was what she recommended most. Thanking her, the young frontman shifted his baby from one hip to the other after putting the box in the cart with the rest of his purchases, then waved to her before heading up front to check out. He just hoped he could hide the pregnancy tests from his sweetheart so Ash wouldn’t think he wanted another baby and was assuming things just yet.


By the time Andy and Legacy got back home, the bassist had thrown up several more times with just as much force. At the moment, he was standing in front of the washer after stuffing their bedding in it and turning it on, having accidentally thrown up on the sheets a bit when he went to grab the trash can slower than his stomach wanted to reject anything else in it. He heard his lover calling out for him when he didn’t find him in the bedroom, but felt too weak to respond.

Since he was concerned about him, Andy set their daughter down in the floor of the nursery with a few toys to occupy her, then started his search for his sweetheart. When he found him hanging onto the washer for dear life, he gasped and immediately started helping him back to their room. Ash was grateful for the help and allowed him to get him settled in the rocker they’d kept there ever since their daughter’s birth while he put fresh bedding on the bed. He apparently realized what’d happened and didn’t ask as he worked, then helped him back into bed so he could get some more rest.

Once he was settled, he was handed a glass of ginger ale and a box of ginger snaps to nibble on in the hopes they’d settle his stomach. As he thanked him and watched him leave the room again, the older man couldn’t help but think he might be pregnant again. He hadn’t told him that his cycles had been a bit off ever since their daughter’s birth, mainly from the stress, and that this was how he’d felt at the beginning of his first pregnancy.

Ash pondered the idea as he laid on his side in their bed, trying to keep the pressure off his stomach until it settled a bit. He wasn’t against having more kids by any means, although he’d have preferred if the one they had was a bit older before they had any more. Not only that, but he’d have preferred that they wait until things with the band weren’t quite so busy, especially with him considering a custom clothing line more now than he had during his first pregnancy. The more he thought about it, the more he started to put the pieces of the puzzle together and realize that he just might be. However, as weak and sick as he still felt, he was gonna have to send Andy out for a pregnancy test before he even thought about going to see Rebecca.

“Hey there, sweetheart,” the younger man said softly, gently sitting on the edge of the bed beside him a couple hours later. “Feeling any better?”

“A little,” Ash answered, still sounding miserable.

“Awww, I’m sorry,” Andy murmured, kissing his forehead again.

“You better be since I’m pretty sure you’re the one who put me in this mess…again,” he grumbled.

“Hmm?” his lover hummed, sitting up to look at him. “What do you mean?”

“Think you can go get me a pregnancy test?” the bassist countered, giving him a pointed look.

“Ah, I see.” The frontman chuckled softly while shaking his head. “Actually, I don’t have to go anywhere to get one.”

Curious and confused, he merely raised a brow at him.

“The woman who showed me where to find the ginger snaps asked how old Legacy was and kinda put the pieces of the puzzle together on her own,” he explained. “She told me that her daughter was eight months old when she and her husband conceived what I’m assuming is their second baby, and suggested that I go ahead and get one while I was there.”

“Mmm. That makes sense,” Ash agreed, gently nodding.

“I’ll go grab it for ya real quick. Need any help getting to the bathroom?” he asked, rising slowly so he wouldn’t jostle him around.

“No, thanks. I think my stomach’s settled enough to manage that on my own,” the bassist answered, shaking his head.

“All right. I’ll be back in a minute,” Andy promised, darting out of their room.

With a soft sigh, he tossed the covers off his legs and used as slow and gentle of movements as he could to avoid upsetting his stomach again. He hated feeling sick and useless like this, and it was really the only part of pregnancy besides a hard kick to the ribs or bladder that he detested. Otherwise, pregnancy had been an enjoyable period of his life the first time around, even without Andy to help him out all the time; he wouldn’t mind being pregnant and creating new life with his lover again.

By the time he’d gotten to the bathroom and leaned against the counter, the man in question was back with a box that said “Clear Blue” on it in his hand. He told him that the woman who’d helped him out was the one to grab the box originally, so he had no say in whether the box contained one or twenty-five. Chuckling, Ash shooed him out of the room for a bit of privacy, which he happily obliged with.

After he’d done what the instructions said, which was no different than when he’d taken the pregnancy test to find out about Legacy, he laid the capped wand on the bathroom counter and set a timer on his phone. The instructions said three minutes, but he set his timer for five just to make sure that the results developed correctly. The only thing he could do after that was sit on the toilet and twiddle his thumbs as he waited, wondering if he really was pregnant again, or if it was just a virus that’d been going around. Waiting for results like these was the hardest part, but it was worth it.

Five minutes later, after silencing the timer that was going off, he rose from where he’d been sitting and walked back over to the counter. In the little display window was a result he’d seen once before, but it still didn’t fail to draw a gasp from him. In bold black lettering, the display window clearly read the word “Pregnant”, just like it had when he found out he was pregnant with their daughter last June. Ash somehow managed to stifle a giddy scream, which would’ve had his boyfriend flying to the bathroom like a roadrunner on crack, thinking he’d hurt himself. That still didn’t stop a soft squeal and a happy dance, but he managed to get himself under control well enough before leaving the bathroom in search of the man he loved.

“Who’s the sweetest little girl in the world?” Andy was cooing at their daughter, whom he held above his head, as he entered the den.

The baby girl giggled and reached down to grab his hair, but he lifted her up higher so she couldn’t.

“You are. Yeah, you are, Legacy. You’re the sweetest baby girl in the world,” he told her, lowering her so he could cuddle her close.

“Ma-ma!” she cried, reaching out to him as she caught sight of him.

“Hey there, Princess,” Ash said, holding his hands out to her. “You miss Mommy this morning?”

“Mmm,” she murmured as she snuggled into him, wrapping her little arms around his neck.

“I guess I’ll take that as a ‘yes’,” he chuckled softly, kissing her head. “I’m sorry, though. Mommy didn’t feel very good this morning.”

“Speaking of…” Andy started, but trailed off.

Grinning, the bassist merely handed the used pregnancy test to him.

“Oh, my…” the younger man breathed, his eyes widening.

“Mmm hmm. I’m gonna call Rebecca in a little bit,” he told him.

“Rebecca?” he asked, suspicious since he’d thought he was a man-whore until a few short months ago.

“My OB/GYN, not some girl on the side, you dolt,” Ash chuckled.

“Considering what I thought about you until a few months ago…” his lover trailed off.

“Eh, true enough. I guess I deserved that,” he admitted.

Laughing, Andy took their daughter back so he could go schedule his appointment with his OB/GYN to have his pregnancy confirmed. They were both smart enough to know that, although the pregnancy test said he was and he was showing symptoms, it could very well still be a stomach virus and a false positive. Neither of them wanted to their hopes up, or scare themselves unnecessarily, for nothing.

A short while later, the bassist had his appointment scheduled for ten the next morning. He gave his lover the option of packing Legacy up so he could come with him, or just staying home so he wouldn’t have to deal with her in the confined space of a doctor’s office. Excited that he could very well get to see the first images of their next baby the next morning, he told him that he’d go with him, not just for that, but for moral support, as well. His words were touching, considering that he hadn’t been there to support him through his first pregnancy, if only by his own choice.

Since he was feeling a bit better, Ash decided to head to his office to attempt coming up with a couple more bass riffs to cure the boredom now taking over his mind. He still kept his ginger ale and ginger snaps close at hand, just in case his stomach started acting up again, but doubted he’d need them. From dawn till noon and dusk till midnight were the times he felt the sickest while pregnant with Legacy, but the rest of the day, his morning sickness seemed to be nonexistent and he seemed to do just fine.

By the time it was time to put Legacy to bed for the night, he felt absolutely drained and wanted nothing more than to sleep for a week. As the loving father he was trying his best to be, Andy told him to go start getting ready for bed while he put the baby down for the night, knowing he didn’t have the energy to do so himself. Nodding and yawning, the bassist headed for their room so he could shower and change his clothes, considering that they weren’t the cleanest on the planet. By the time he was done and ready to crawl into bed, his lover was already laying there waiting on him. With another yawn, he crawled into bed and settled down in his arms, falling peacefully asleep shortly thereafter.

Notes