Through Pain of Heart Or Loss of Mind
Chapter 4: Nerves
ONE MONTH LATER (Day before Warped starts)
"Mircee, hurry the fuck up! We can't miss our flight man!" Amelia shouted from the living room. I was doing my makeup in the bathroom, and there was no way I was doing my makeup in a cramped ass plane restroom on our way to Seattle. There was no way I was going looking like shit either. We were all probably going to meet some of the bands and some of my idols. Some of my attractive idols. I grinned as I put on the last coat of mascara on my lashes.
"Just leave the key and I'll lock the door! I'll head down in a minute!" I heard her set the keys down and opening and closing the door.
I was applying a dark maroon shade of lip gloss and I started thinking about Jason. My stomach fluttered a bit when I remembered him eventually telling me I'd kissed him the night I'd gotten pretty drunk. I'd felt so embarrassed that I had done that, and I realized he looked so nervous as he told me. Since then, I'd been thinking a lot about my feelings for him, and maybe I cared for him a lot more than I thought. I've also started flirting with him instead of teasing him, and after a few times, he'd started flirting back.
I smiled and realized my phone in my pocket was going off. I took it out and looked at the screen. Speak of the devil. I answered, smiling.
"Why, hello there." I said.
"Heyy, so I know you wanna look all sexy and everything, and trust me, you're always gorgeous, but frankly we've got a plane to catch, love."
I blushed, my smile growing wider.
"I'll be down in a minute, and while we're at it, I'm tryin' to look sexy for a certain someone ya know," I chuckled, thinking I'd won this little flirt fight.
"I've seen you in your bra and panties. That's the sexiest thing I'll ever see, darling." I knew he was smirking. My face blushed a brighter pink and I was speechless. When it came to things about my body I got nervous, and he knew that.
He laughed after my moment of silence.
"But really Mircee, come down. We really have to leave," he said while still chuckling.
"Will do," I said, still blushing, and I hung up. I put all my makeup away into my red carry-on and left the bathroom, turning off the light. I grabbed the keys from the kitchen counter and walked out, locking the door behind me. I walked down the three flights of stairs and met up with everyone at the car in the parking lot. We were taking my red Prius since Jason's car had run out of gas the night before and Marcus had a motorcycle, leaving me to provide the ride to the airport.
I blushed again as I walked up to Jason who was leaning on the driver's side door. He grinned.
"Give me your keys. I'll drive."
I handed him my keys and walked around to the passenger's side door as he unlocked it and got in. I got in and plugged my phone in to play music as we pulled out and started driving.
"What took you so long, Mirc? I was beginning to think you were masturbating one last time before we left privacy for almost two months." I heard her chuckle as I chose a song to play. As the music played, I turned around, leaning over the seat to face her.
"Oh I didn't. I don't think I'll be needing to do that for a while," I winked and she chuckled louder, making Jason show a curious expression as I sat back in my seat.
I had my phone on shuffle on Spotify and after a couple minutes, the song changed. Can You Feel My Heart by Bring Me The Horizon came on and Jason turned up the volume. BMTH was his favorite of all bands. Everyone in the car sang along, knowing the song so well because of Jason. He was tapping his fingers along the steering wheel, and when his favorite part of the song was coming up, he pointed to me. I got all dramatic and started singing.
I'm scared to get close and I hate being alone
I long for that feeling to not feel at all
The higher I get, the lower I'll sink
I can't drown my demons, they know how to swim
I held that fake pained expression and motioned both of my hands as I sang. They all started singing along again as the chorus came on for the ending of the song. Jason smiled as the song ended.
After twenty minutes of driving, we all hastily got out of the car and grabbed our luggage. We dashed into the airport, dropping off our luggage and tagging our carry-ons, then going through security. We then quickly found our terminal and sat down, waiting for the plane to arrive. We'd made it fifteen minutes early.
Planes made me nervous and I started fidgeting with my sweater sleeve and tapping my shoe. Jason noticed and slid his hand into mine, giving me an assuring squeeze. I looked up at him.
"Everything will be fine. Just don't think about it, think about how we've finally made it this far. We've made it to Warped, you're dream is becoming reality." He gave me a soft smile and I squeezed his hand. I nodded and laid my head on his shoulder. Why is it that I never thought of being with him before? He was sweet and always seemed to know the right words to say. He made me smile when I really needed it and I knew him better than any other guy. But there was just something missing that I couldn't quite get my mind on. I couldn't understand why I hadn't thought about this before.
"Terminal B4 to Seattle will now be seating passengers. Terminal B4 to Seattle will now be seating passengers." The intercom shut off and we all stood up, grabbing our carry-ons. I was still holding Jason's hand as I took out my ticket and we walked towards the gate line. They checked our tickets and we made our way onto the plane. We were in first class, which was new for us.
As we made our way through the plane, I noticed a guy stand up as we were about to walk by.
"Holy shit! You guys are Ahead Of Time right?!" he said with wide eyes. I smirked.
"Why hell yeah we are!" I said. People behind us were groaning and yelling for us to move. I was holding everyone up, "Hey, why don't we sign something for you when we get off?" I said, smiling. He nodded and sat back down. As we started moving towards the back of the plane again, Amelia chuckled.
"He was pretty hot. He might just get more than a signature from me."
From the sound of her voice, she was probably smirking. Still trying to get Marcus jealous I see. She'd be lucky if she got a reaction out of that boy.
As we got to the first class section and sat down, I heard Amelia sigh in front of me.
"Damn, I was expecting more." I heard her say. Marcus mumbled something to her as he sat down next to her. I couldn't hear what he said.
First class wasn't a huge improvement from regular seating, just the seats were nicer and a bit more spacious. I looked up and saw Jason putting his carry-on in the overhead compartment. He looked down at me and asked if I wanted him to put my carry-on in there as well. I handed it to him and he put it in there, sitting back down. The intercom came on about safety and how long the flight would be. We'd be on this damned plane for about three hours. I groaned as I put on my seat belt. As soon as it clicked in, I looked up to find Jason looking at me.
"Hey, you feeling alright?" he asked.
"Yeah, just still a bit nervous."
As I said that, the plane moved and my body stiffed. Jason took ahold of my hand and squeezed it. As the plane slowly made its way to depart, I closed my eyes. When the plane gradually got faster and shook, my grip on Jason's hand tightened. When we lifted up into the air and my stomach dropped, I opened my eyes to see Jason's dark blue ones.
"You really do not like planes," he said laughing a bit.
"Yeah, I really don't," I said, giving a nervous laugh.
"Why don't you sleep? You can lay on my shoulder and I'll ask for a blanket." He looked away and called a nearby stewardess, asking for a blanket. She nodded, leaving and coming back a second later, handing Jason a blue folded up blanket. He thanked her and turned back to me.
"Here," he unfolded the blanket and covered me with it, "now I'll be a good pillow, and you sleep, alright?" I smiled and nodded, laying my head on his shoulder.
"Thank you," I mumbled.
"It's no big deal, I'd do anything for you." I heard him say as I closed my eyes, gradually making my way towards sleep.
"Mircee, hurry the fuck up! We can't miss our flight man!" Amelia shouted from the living room. I was doing my makeup in the bathroom, and there was no way I was doing my makeup in a cramped ass plane restroom on our way to Seattle. There was no way I was going looking like shit either. We were all probably going to meet some of the bands and some of my idols. Some of my attractive idols. I grinned as I put on the last coat of mascara on my lashes.
"Just leave the key and I'll lock the door! I'll head down in a minute!" I heard her set the keys down and opening and closing the door.
I was applying a dark maroon shade of lip gloss and I started thinking about Jason. My stomach fluttered a bit when I remembered him eventually telling me I'd kissed him the night I'd gotten pretty drunk. I'd felt so embarrassed that I had done that, and I realized he looked so nervous as he told me. Since then, I'd been thinking a lot about my feelings for him, and maybe I cared for him a lot more than I thought. I've also started flirting with him instead of teasing him, and after a few times, he'd started flirting back.
I smiled and realized my phone in my pocket was going off. I took it out and looked at the screen. Speak of the devil. I answered, smiling.
"Why, hello there." I said.
"Heyy, so I know you wanna look all sexy and everything, and trust me, you're always gorgeous, but frankly we've got a plane to catch, love."
I blushed, my smile growing wider.
"I'll be down in a minute, and while we're at it, I'm tryin' to look sexy for a certain someone ya know," I chuckled, thinking I'd won this little flirt fight.
"I've seen you in your bra and panties. That's the sexiest thing I'll ever see, darling." I knew he was smirking. My face blushed a brighter pink and I was speechless. When it came to things about my body I got nervous, and he knew that.
He laughed after my moment of silence.
"But really Mircee, come down. We really have to leave," he said while still chuckling.
"Will do," I said, still blushing, and I hung up. I put all my makeup away into my red carry-on and left the bathroom, turning off the light. I grabbed the keys from the kitchen counter and walked out, locking the door behind me. I walked down the three flights of stairs and met up with everyone at the car in the parking lot. We were taking my red Prius since Jason's car had run out of gas the night before and Marcus had a motorcycle, leaving me to provide the ride to the airport.
I blushed again as I walked up to Jason who was leaning on the driver's side door. He grinned.
"Give me your keys. I'll drive."
I handed him my keys and walked around to the passenger's side door as he unlocked it and got in. I got in and plugged my phone in to play music as we pulled out and started driving.
"What took you so long, Mirc? I was beginning to think you were masturbating one last time before we left privacy for almost two months." I heard her chuckle as I chose a song to play. As the music played, I turned around, leaning over the seat to face her.
"Oh I didn't. I don't think I'll be needing to do that for a while," I winked and she chuckled louder, making Jason show a curious expression as I sat back in my seat.
I had my phone on shuffle on Spotify and after a couple minutes, the song changed. Can You Feel My Heart by Bring Me The Horizon came on and Jason turned up the volume. BMTH was his favorite of all bands. Everyone in the car sang along, knowing the song so well because of Jason. He was tapping his fingers along the steering wheel, and when his favorite part of the song was coming up, he pointed to me. I got all dramatic and started singing.
I'm scared to get close and I hate being alone
I long for that feeling to not feel at all
The higher I get, the lower I'll sink
I can't drown my demons, they know how to swim
I held that fake pained expression and motioned both of my hands as I sang. They all started singing along again as the chorus came on for the ending of the song. Jason smiled as the song ended.
After twenty minutes of driving, we all hastily got out of the car and grabbed our luggage. We dashed into the airport, dropping off our luggage and tagging our carry-ons, then going through security. We then quickly found our terminal and sat down, waiting for the plane to arrive. We'd made it fifteen minutes early.
Planes made me nervous and I started fidgeting with my sweater sleeve and tapping my shoe. Jason noticed and slid his hand into mine, giving me an assuring squeeze. I looked up at him.
"Everything will be fine. Just don't think about it, think about how we've finally made it this far. We've made it to Warped, you're dream is becoming reality." He gave me a soft smile and I squeezed his hand. I nodded and laid my head on his shoulder. Why is it that I never thought of being with him before? He was sweet and always seemed to know the right words to say. He made me smile when I really needed it and I knew him better than any other guy. But there was just something missing that I couldn't quite get my mind on. I couldn't understand why I hadn't thought about this before.
"Terminal B4 to Seattle will now be seating passengers. Terminal B4 to Seattle will now be seating passengers." The intercom shut off and we all stood up, grabbing our carry-ons. I was still holding Jason's hand as I took out my ticket and we walked towards the gate line. They checked our tickets and we made our way onto the plane. We were in first class, which was new for us.
As we made our way through the plane, I noticed a guy stand up as we were about to walk by.
"Holy shit! You guys are Ahead Of Time right?!" he said with wide eyes. I smirked.
"Why hell yeah we are!" I said. People behind us were groaning and yelling for us to move. I was holding everyone up, "Hey, why don't we sign something for you when we get off?" I said, smiling. He nodded and sat back down. As we started moving towards the back of the plane again, Amelia chuckled.
"He was pretty hot. He might just get more than a signature from me."
From the sound of her voice, she was probably smirking. Still trying to get Marcus jealous I see. She'd be lucky if she got a reaction out of that boy.
As we got to the first class section and sat down, I heard Amelia sigh in front of me.
"Damn, I was expecting more." I heard her say. Marcus mumbled something to her as he sat down next to her. I couldn't hear what he said.
First class wasn't a huge improvement from regular seating, just the seats were nicer and a bit more spacious. I looked up and saw Jason putting his carry-on in the overhead compartment. He looked down at me and asked if I wanted him to put my carry-on in there as well. I handed it to him and he put it in there, sitting back down. The intercom came on about safety and how long the flight would be. We'd be on this damned plane for about three hours. I groaned as I put on my seat belt. As soon as it clicked in, I looked up to find Jason looking at me.
"Hey, you feeling alright?" he asked.
"Yeah, just still a bit nervous."
As I said that, the plane moved and my body stiffed. Jason took ahold of my hand and squeezed it. As the plane slowly made its way to depart, I closed my eyes. When the plane gradually got faster and shook, my grip on Jason's hand tightened. When we lifted up into the air and my stomach dropped, I opened my eyes to see Jason's dark blue ones.
"You really do not like planes," he said laughing a bit.
"Yeah, I really don't," I said, giving a nervous laugh.
"Why don't you sleep? You can lay on my shoulder and I'll ask for a blanket." He looked away and called a nearby stewardess, asking for a blanket. She nodded, leaving and coming back a second later, handing Jason a blue folded up blanket. He thanked her and turned back to me.
"Here," he unfolded the blanket and covered me with it, "now I'll be a good pillow, and you sleep, alright?" I smiled and nodded, laying my head on his shoulder.
"Thank you," I mumbled.
"It's no big deal, I'd do anything for you." I heard him say as I closed my eyes, gradually making my way towards sleep.
8/15/13