I can't feel anything anymore.

" oh my god"

My eyes stayed fixed on The floor of Ella's car but the image became blurred as the seconds passed by. All the news pounded into my head like cement blocks, weighing at my brain and making it harder to breathe.

I couldn't be, how could I be? I wanted this badly to be a nightmare that I could wake up from, but it wasn't.

It was only the day after tour but since I was continuously sick Ella insisted that She took me to the doctors and What I expected to be a stomach bug was something way more shocking, something that was about to change my life forever.

Once the thought flooded back around my brain a sob escaped my lips. Once it did a pair of small arms wrapped them selfs around my body.

"Honey, honey calm down it'll all be okay"

I shook my head and sobbed harder into her shirt.

"Jessica"

I cried harder and forced myself to sit up in the seat to look at Ella. Her arm was still stretched out around my shoulder as she looked at me.

"It's all going to be okay"

"Ella, I'm pregnant nothing's going to be okay"

She shook her head at me and rubbed my back soothingly as another son threatened it's way out of my mouth.

"Listen to me"

I pushed my sweaty palms against my damp face roughly as the one question rang over and over in my head

"What the fuck is cc going to say?"

Iopened my eyes and saw Hers starring into my own but they then softened as she rubbed my shoulder slowly

"Listen to me, it's going to be fine, he'll support you no matter what alright?"

I took a deep breath in and nodded at her, pushing my numb body against her warm leather seats. She sat back in her own seat and started the car pulling away from the curb

The car ride was silent for the next 10 minutes before Ella broke it.

" do you want to tell the others tonight?"

I sighed and nodded

"Yeah I guess I probably should"

She let out a small laugh

"Probably

" A small smirk fell upon my lips

"How about you and cc and Ashley come for dinner around 5 tonight and I'll invite the rest of them Over and you can break the amazing news"

I laughed before nodding and falling against the seat in silence again.

-

"Ella I can not do this"

My chest heaved with an anxiety to such extremes I've never felt before.

"Yes you can Jesus Christ come on"

She pulled my shoulder towards her so our eyes met. I smiled at her slightly watching her eyes flicker at me.

"Go in there and tell that boy that since he didn't use a condom you are now with child"

My lips moved upward in a smile as I shoved her slightly.

"I'll use those exact words thank you so much Ella"

"Anytime love,now go in there"

I took in a deep breath and nodded towards her as she pulled me into a tight hug.

"I'll see you at 5"

I wiped my eyes and Nodded towards her. I pushed the car door open.

"Thank you, so much"

"Anytime love, I'm Always here for you"

With that I stepped out and walked to the front door. The whole 3 minutes of me walking in was a huge gigantic blur. I felt ready to pass out by the time I reached the living room where cc and Ashley were.

"Hey, there you are!" I smiled weakily at them making cc pause the game and look at me

"What's wrong?"

I let out a breathy sigh making Ashley put his controller down as well.

"What happened?"

I ignored both of their comments averting my glance towards cc.

"Cc, can I please talk to you in the kitchen "

I watched as the two boys looked at each other nervously before cc pushed his body off of the couch and walked towards me.

The look on his face reminded me of a child who just got caught with their hand in a cookie jar. My lips pulled in a soft smile towards him making him relax slightly as I walked into the kitchen, him trailing behind me. I was silent for about a minute as I leaned against the counter. Cc walked to me slowly and put his hands on my waist.

"Babe what's wrong?"

The slight tremble in his voice gave away that I was scarring him, he was obviously thinking the worse and I knew I had to silence his thoughts

" I'm so sorry if I did something wrong ba-"

"Honey listen, you did nothing wrong I just have to tell you something and I'm scared"

His eyes softened as he brought his lips to my forehead in a gentle kiss before looking me in the eyes.

"Listen, I love you so much and nothing you can say right now will make that faulted at all right now unless you say that you're in love with your brother or something"

I let out a shaky chuckle before pulling in a breath

"Okay, just please be honest with how you feel when I say this okay?"

He nodded enthusiastically and I pushed away slightly. I pushed over towards the stove before turning around and pulling one final breath into my lungs.

"CC, I'm pregnant"

I watched as every bone in his body froze making the anxiety in my chest shoot up to my head.

"You're what?"

Before I had time to react to him the kitchen door slammed violently against the wall.

"You're what?!"

Both our heads shot to the side as Ashley barged through the kitchen practically falling onto the cold tile. I giggled slightly as a few tear slipped out of my eyes.Cc looked between me and him before rushing over to a shocked Ashley and shoving him back out the door.

"Go in the living room you ease dropper we'll talk after"

I laughed again as the kitchen door swung closed with a thump and cc looked at me.

"You're pregnant?"

I nodded again feeling more tears fall down my face. He was angry god he was going to leave me probably.

"Oh my god"

I watched as he looked to his hands as the news sunk in to him.

"Oh my fucking God" he mumbled again to himself.

"I'm going to be a father"

This time a small smile appeared on his lips as he looked up at me. I saw a fear tears of his own sparkle against his hazel eyes

"I'm going to be a dad! Oh my fucking God"

With that he launched himself at me and pulled me against his chest. All this commotion made me suddenly surprised, I had expected him to react the opposite but he was happy.

"Wait, you're not upset?" I looked up and saw him shake his head fast at me smiling like a mad man.

"Are you kidding? I'm so happy! We can be a family babe! Do you not want that?"

I shook my head with a smile and pushed my arms around him tightly.

"I want that I want that so bad I was just scared you wouldn't."

"You were scared for nothing oh my god this is great, when can we find out what it is? How far are you?"

I laughed as his words came out fast and together.

"I have another appointment In two weeks, right now I'm 8 weeks. That's why I've been so sick I took a test a month ago in tour but it was wrong. We can find out in a month I think"

With those words I was lifted in the air and spun around making me laugh at how excited he was. Once he put me on the ground he brought me in for a kiss before dropping to his knees and rubbing my stomach that hadn't really begun to show that much yet.

"I'm so excited"

I smiled down at him as he kissed my stomach gently. He jumped to his feet again and kissed my cheeks.

"This is so amazing, I love you"

I couldn't help the grin that spread across my lips at this.

"I love you too darling"

"Should we go talk to Ashley before he calls the others in a panic? Because I'm waiting to tell them tonight"

He stood up with a smile and nodded grabbing my hand and rushing through the door to the living room nothing but a grin on his face.

Notes

Hey! I'm back! Shoutout to @Theagaia for tweeting me and asking me when I was updating I had no idea you guys still cared about this and I'm thankful for all your reads. I am getting to work on this story so expect more updates.

Also so feel free to follow me on Twitter or message me with questions or anything! Thank you all

@omandjess

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- Jess ✌