I can't feel anything anymore.

I sighed staring at the cold ,dim room feeling cc's arm dangling around my body as his chest moved up and down with soft snores .

It was 6am and I had been up all night, I couldn't sleep no matter how hard I tried, my mind was cluttered.

I looked around before slowly sliding out of the warm bed. I stretched my body out before walking towards the sliding glass door.I slowly pulled it open and stepped outside shivering as the cold morning air blanketed me.

I sighed out before hoping up on the railing and sitting down on it bringing my knees to my chest as I rested my head against them.

I looked out on the foggy back yard hearing the light chirps of birds. The sun was starting to come out and I watched the trees letting out a cold breath.

I couldn't sleep because all I could think of was visiting my parents, I made up my mind at about 3 am that I was going to go, at least try and if things hadn't changed then I knew but I was scared that they were just going to turn me away.

I sighed and lifted my head and fished in cc's black basketball shorts for my iPhone.

I pulled it out and unlocked it before going into my contacts list and hovering over a contact. I took in a breath and hit dial before leaning forward again and placing the cold phone to my ear as the dial tone rang through my ears.

My glance stayed on the trees as the dial tone cut off and I heard the other line shifting around.

" hello?" The voice asked tired and groggy.

" hey jake, I'm sorry did I wake you?" I asked and I heard him chuckle lightly

" kind of, why are you up so early?" He asked and I sighed into my knees

" I couldn't sleep and I uh, I don't know wanted to talk, where are you guys?"

" we went to the city last night, stayed In a hotel, now I know that's not all you want to talk about so why did you really call?" He asked

" we'll I visited johns family"

" oh that's awesome! How are they?"

I smiled a little

" they're great, but they told me that , uh mom and dad miss me."

The line went silent

" oh, really?"

" yeah.. They think I should visit them"

" are you going to?"

" I was thinking about it but , if I did I was hoping you would come"

" I would love to, I'm glad you finally decided to" he said and I smiled a little feeling my knees shake.

"Yeah."

" so when do you want to go?" He asked and I stared at a bird playing in the yard

" um, today?"

"Yeah, deffinatly we'll be home by 12, we will to then okay?"

" yeah"

" okay I'm going to rest some more because I'm wiped ill see you later ,I love you"

I smiled feeling my chest loosen

" I love you too"

" bye"

"Bye"

And with that the line went dead and I sighed out looking out into the yard.

Was I really going todo this? So many years, I wasn't sure if I could.

I let out a another breath feeling my body shake as the cold wind hugged my body .

" if you keep that up you're gana fall"cc's voice said groggily making me jump and whip my head to the side.

He was leaning against the door frame in a pair of shorts and no shirt.

I smiled a little and silently hoped off the railing and walked into his arms wrapping mine tightly around his torso burying my head in his chest.

"So you're visiting your parents?"he asked against my hair as he tightly wrapped his arms around me also.

I lifted my head up

" you heard that?"

He smiled and nodded.

I groaned and dug my head back into his chest

" jakes taking me , but I don't even know if I want to"

He laughed and rubbed my arms

" you'll be fine"

"if you say so"

" I do ,now can we go back inside it's freezing."

I chuckled into his chest and nodded pulling away. He kissed my cheek and lazily grabbed my hand walking back into the warm bedroom.

He let go of my hand and I stretched out yawning as he walked to the floor and picked up his shirt throwing it on.

"I'm not going to be able to get back to bed can we go watch a movie?" He asked and I nodded lazily still tired.

He chuckled and kissed my forehead before walking out the door as I followed him.

We were silent as we walked down the warm carpeted stairs and into the living room that was dimly lit from the sun that had began rise a little bit ago.

I dropped into the soft black couch as he walked to the tv and placed a DVD in.

He turned around and dropped down next to me throwing an arm around my shoulder so I was moved against his chest. I smiled against him as the credits rolled by

" so what time Is jake coming home?" He asked and I yawned before replying

" around 12"

I yawned again and he laughed

" what time did you get to sleep?"

" I didn't ive been up all night"

He laughed again and rubbed my shoulder again.

" jesus christ go to sleep"

I shook my head in his chest as the movie started but my eyes started to close.

" I love you" I heard cc murmer just As darkness overcame me.

---

My eyes shot open at the sound of a door slamming open and I looked around the now brightly lit living room where the tv was off.

I still felt cc's hand draped over my side and I looked up seeing him smiling down at me.

" morning sleepy head"

I laughed sitting up just as Andy walked in smiling with Juliet next to him

" hey! Did we wake you?" He teased rubbing my head and I flipped him off as the others walked in.

" hey" jake said kissing my head as he walked past also going to sit on the couch followed by Ella who messed up my hair walking past causing me to smirk.

" hey"

" hey Jess" jinxx spoke leaning down to kiss my head as he walked past

i smiled

" if you want to go you should get dressed so we can go now" jake added pulling me from my thoughts and I nodded looking at the clock, 12:45.

I stood up and stretched my body out smiling as I saw jinxx and Sammi cuddled on the couch next to jake and Ella.

Juliet and Andy sat next to cc and I yawned again before silently heading to the stairs.

I slowly walked up them and heard jake shout

. " let's go! Walk faster lazy!"

I laughed making my way up the rest of the steps. I walked to the room I was staying in and shut the door rubbing my face sleep still lingering in my body.

I shook slightly , half from lack of sleep and half from nerves. I was so nervous, what were they gana say? Were they gana just accept me back in their life? It wasn't that easy, was it? I

groaned as I slid on my black skinny jeans. I put on a white Blink-182 shirt and a red plaid shirt before quickly brushing out my hair and slipping on my black toms.

I picked up my phone from the floor and this time more quickly made my way out of the purple room and into the brightly lit hall.

I heard them talking as I made my way down the stairs. When I got to the living room they were all laughing and I smiled leaning against the wall.

Jake looked at me and smiled

" there you are! Ready?"

I groaned leaning my head back and closing my eyes

" no"

They laughed and I heard footsteps walking towards me making me open my eyes to see cc in front of me.

" you'll be fine, no matter what happens at least you saw them " he said and I smiled as he leaned forward and softly kissed my lips.

" okay it's time to go" jake said standing up and I groaned kissing cc again.

"I'll be here after, okay?"

I sighed nodding and he smiled hugging me as he let go so jake could wrap around me .

" we will be back soon ,bye!" He called and I heard the others shout their goodbyes and good lucks as we left the room and walked towards the door.

He opened it and we walked out silently heading for the car.

God I hope this goes okay.

Notes