Picture Perfect?

ASHLEY'S POV:

"No thank you , I'm flattered , but I don't have any interest in anyone except my wife ." , I say , for what feels like the thousandth time this week .
"Oh , come on , hon ! It's not like she's here to check up on you . Besides , she's knocked up right now , isn't she ? You're gonna need somebody to have some fun with ." , the half- dressed Barbie wannabe whispers , trying to be seductive . She moves closer to me , and attempts to sit in my lap , and I stand up before she can complete the move .
"Hey , Yanni ! C'mere a sec !" , I call across the venue's hospitality suite .
"Yeah , whaddya need , dude ?" , he asks as he makes his way across the room .
"Can you please escort this young ... lady , I guess , outside ? She doesn't seem to grasp the fact that her attention isn't welcome ."
"No problemo , Ash !" , he replies , taking her arm and leading her away , pouting and protesting the entire time .
"Shit , I hate having to have people tossed out !" , I groan , as CC and Jake come over to stand next to me .
"We all do , bro !" , CC says . "But some of them just won't take the hint , so what other option is there ?"
"None ." , Jake answers . "You were busy Skyping Dev this morning , so I'm not sure if you heard what happened to Andy ."
" No , I guess I didn't ."
"He had breakfast brought up to his room this morning , and apparently , the staffer who brought it did something to the door so the lock wouldn't catch . He went to have a shower after he ate , and when he came out , well , it was basically the same thing that happened to you on Dev's birthday trip . The girl had told one of her friends which room he was in , and she just made herself at home ."
"Yeah , he had to call security , 'cause she refused to leave !" , CC chimed in .
"What the hell is it that makes it seem like the fangirls got crazier AFTER we all got into relationships ?" , I ask them , and Andy and Jinxx join us as I do .
"We noticed that you seemed to have a cling - on , Ash ." , Jinxx says .
"Yeah , and they were just telling me about Andy's 'guest' this morning ." , I say .
He pulls a face , and says , "Fuck , man , she was yelling all the way down to the elevator when security hauled her off ! How the hell did you manage to miss that ?"
"Skyping with Dev , what else is he usually doing ?" , CC informs him , and this reminds me of something .
I scramble my phone out of my pocket , and say , "Hey , you guys have to see this . Dev sent this to my phone , and you can actually see him now ! Or her , either way !"
I bring up the picture on my phone , and pass it around to the guys . Dev is wearing a sort of form - fitting blue tank top , and it shows the beginnings of what all the girls refer to as the "baby bump" .
They all look at it , including Yanni , who just got back from taking the girl out . He sort of chuckles as he hands my phone back , and I ask him , "What the hell is so funny about that , man ?"
"Nothing , dude !" , he says . "It just sort of struck me funny that a couple of years ago , you would have been all about Blondie , and something like THIS would have probably had you booking the first flight to Nepal ."
" I wouldn't go that far , but I kind of see your point ." , I acknowledge . "Before I met Dev , I'm not sure I even expected myself to have this kind of a connection to any woman . I know that it's not what most people expect from me , and that chick earlier was exactly the type I used to go for , but they just leave me cold now ."
"I feel ya , bro !" , Andy says . "The problem seems to be getting them to understand that ."
"Apparently !" , I say , giving him a smirk .
"Sounds like we're gonna have to start checking the doors every time room service or housekeeping shows up from now on ." , Jinxx observes .
"Hey , guys , ten minutes !" , Jon yells , so we all grab our stuff and start heading toward the stage . This is without doubt the best part of the day , except for the times we get to spend on the phone , or Skype , with our respective ladies .

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I step out of the shower , and tuck the towel around my waist . Heading out of the bathroom , I sit down on the edge of the bed , pick up my phone , and dial .
On the second ring , I hear the sound of the call being answered , then , "Hiya , babe ! How was the show ?"
"The show was great , before and after , not as much ." , I respond .
"Why's that ?" , she asks .
I recount the days events , even telling her the story about Andy . She giggles a bit , but sympathizes with the problems we're having .
"I don't get it , darlin' ." , I tell her . "Yeah , there's always the stray chick that doesn't seem to understand what a wedding ring is , but since they found out about the baby , it's like they're crawling out of the woodwork !"
"Because they think that gives most guys an excuse to cut loose , since they know they won't be getting any at home for awhile ." , she says .
"And if that's how those guys feel , they're assholes . Dev , you know I'm up for making love with you anytime I can , but that's definitely not the only reason I want to be with you . And if I have to go without for awhile because you're having my baby , I'd say it's a fair trade ."
"You do know that you're the most perfect man on the planet , don't you ?" , she replies .
"And maybe you're a little bit biased , babe . How's the baby doing today ?"
"Just fine , except that he , or she , has developed a taste for peanut butter and marshmallow fluff sandwiches ." , she chuckles .
"OK , that rates a full - body shudder !" , I say . "Let me talk to our offspring ."
She laughs , and a couple of seconds later , I hear her say , "Okay , everything's in position , babe !" Her voice sounds a bit further away , so I know that she's moved the phone away from her ear .
"Hey there , sprout, it's Daddy ! I miss you and Mommy , and I'll be home as soon as I can . But right now , I think we need to have a little talk . I'm glad you're coming along so well , but I'm not sure it's very nice to try to turn Mommy's teeth into sugar cubes , little one . Maybe you should try to think about something a little better for the two of you , like some nice fruit or something ."
I can hear her laughing , so I know she has the phone on speaker . "Hey , you're not supposed to eavesdrop on somebody else's conversation , y'know !" , I laugh .
"When one of the participants is currently taking up residence in my body , that rule no longer applies ." , she retorts .
By now , we're both laughing so hard we can barely speak . "Hey , are you sure this is OK ? I don't want you to hurt yourself !" , I say , when I can finally form words .
"Ashley , I'm not an invalid , and it's not gonna hurt either one of us to have a good laugh now and then . I know you're concerned , and I appreciate that , but I swear if you think you're going to come home after the tour and try to monitor my every move , I'll make you sleep in the guest room until I go into labor !"
"I'm sorry , darlin' , I don't mean to sound like a control freak . I just don't have the slightest fucking idea what's okay and what isn't , and I don't want to do anything that would hurt either of you ."
"I know , Ash , and I didn't mean to snap at you . I guess my system is starting to get a little out of whack . You know I wouldn't really do that , I'd have too much trouble sleeping myself ."
"Maybe I should start reading up on this , so I don't make a bloody damn idiot of myself later ."
"Couldn't hurt . So , when are you guys supposed to be coming back to the States ? Dr . Hong wants to know when to set up the appointment for the sonogram , so we can find out who we have in here ."
I grab my bag, fish the schedule out of the pocket , and scan through it . "We're scheduled to be back on April 7th , be off one day , do three shows , then we have four days free , so between the 12th and the 16th ." , I tell her .
"So I'll make the appointment then , because I really want you to be with me , so we can find out together if this is a boy or a girl ." , she says .
"I wouldn't miss that for anything ! You just tell me when it is , and I'll be there , even if I have to skip out on a show ."
"Oh , yeah ! That would go over well , wouldn't it ?", she says , then I hear her trying to stifle a yawn .
" I should let you go , so you can get some sleep ." , I say .
"I'm sorry , babe , I'd really like to talk to you some more , but Sprout here seems to want a bit more of my energy than I thought ." , she responds , then yawns again .
"Goodnight , love , sweet dreams ." , I say . "Goodnight , Sprout . Be good for Mommy . I love both of you ."
" Goodnight , Ash , we love you , too ."
I end the call , then take off the towel and put on a pair of boxers , then finish drying my hair , so I can go to bed . As I'm unplugging the hairdryer , I hear a knock on the door . I go to the door , look out the peephole , and see a pair of barely - clothed girls standing in the hall .
"Open the door , Ashley , we know you're there !" , one of them says . "We know you must be lonely , so we're here to keep you company !"
"Fuck my life , is this EVER going to stop ?" , I mumble to myself as I walk over to the hotel - room phone .
"Front desk , what can I do for you ?"
"Security , please ."
Here we go again .

Notes