It has passed just like three weeks since was released, but I still couldn´t get used to some of the stuff that has changed. For example my address. I wasn´t living in Slovakia anymore. Neither in Europe. And the time. The last thing I remember was my coming to Vans Warped Tour like fifteen years old teen girl with big expectation. And now I´m fresh eighteen and I don´t know how it all happened. I also don´t understand everything. But they told me that I made some new friends – Black Veil Brides. And guess what? My best friend is Juliet Simms! We have time to chat a while, but now she´s on big tour around the world.I hung out with Andy a few times. It was fun, but I feel incompletely with him. Today we´re going to meet again.

I was waiting for him in the garden behind my house. And I was thinking. A lot. I missed Tommy, his effort to make me laugh when I feel miserable, his voice and touch. The thing would be easier with him. I feel like I have lost a part of me. Part what makes me myself. It sounds weird and crazy and… But I´m discovering that when I´m with Andy all over again. “What makes this beautiful head so busy?” I turned around and noticed Andy. We hugged each other. He had a good mood.
“Global Problems of our beautiful Earth…” I replied. He chuckled. “I see that you´re keeping joking.” I giggled. “I want to take you somewhere…” I stood up, and we walked out the main gate. We were taking the whole time. After few minutes, we stopped in one of the playgrounds. I giggled.
“It´s not fair! You know me… I´m at a disadvantage.” Andy smiled. I sat on one of the swings. I have always done that. It´s like my routine. When I see the swing the first thing what I do is sit on it remembering to good old days. He watched me for a short moment and then he sat on other. “You don´t remember it, but here you opened me your mind for the first time.” I looked at him and turned my body against him. “Please, don´t do that to me! It´s frustrated. Maybe I can´t remember what we survived together, but we can make new memories, can´t we?” He raised his head, and he stared deep into my eyes and saw my deep thoughts.
“So can you swing me?” I suggest with smiling eyes and childish voice. Andy stood up and did what I begged him before. This joy reminds me my childhood that wasn´t so bad after all. But at that moment, I remembered…

*flashback – accident (three years ago)*
“Ask Andy!” He shouted. My laugh fell, and I got mad.
“I will! He can answer me this question because he was there!” We were quarreling. Tommy wasn´t paying attention to a road. Suddenly two girls appeared in front of the car.
“Tommy! Watch!”
*end of flashback *

I gasped and suddenly fell off the swing. I hit myself on the stone right in the face. It left me bloody mark above my eyebrow. I was bleeding a little bit. I scared Andy. He was apologizing me, and he wiped the blood. I was immersed in thoughts. It was confusing.
“It was dark and rainy, and we were driving…” My voice was cracking. “We were fighting, and he mentioned you and then… girls…” Andy totally froze. He just sat on the ground and looked nowhere. “Andy, where´s Tommy? And be honest with me!” He took my hand and… “I´m sorry, love…”
“OMG! No… noo…no.” My tears were streaming down my face. My heart was broken, my soul shattered into millions of pieces. The part that I was discovering died. I was strong enough to stand. “Why have you lied to me?”
"You had a rough time behind, and I didn´t want to stress you more."
"If you´ve known me as much as you think you´d know that one think I don´t stomach is lie. I trusted you!" I was upset. Andy tried to help, but I rejected. "Just take me home!"

This day was the worst ever. I´ve never cried the whole day before. I was in some panic shock. I just found out that my boyfriend is dead for three years. I want to Die! My world began to fall apart. Nothing´s going to be the same. I have become a living corpse.

Notes