They Can't Stop Us From Our Freedom

“Wake up sleepy head,” Andy whispered in my ear.

“What? Where am I? What’s going on?”

“Well, you’re on warped tour and you’re currently in my bunk. You had a nightmare last night and came to sleep with me, remember?”

“No, I don’t normally remember things like that. Most of the time, I’m actually sleepwalking.”

“Wait, how many times has this happened?”

“A lot, I’ve been getting them forever.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. But wait, you don’t remember ANYTHING?”

“Nope.”

“So you don’t remember trying to apologize?”

“Um, no?”

“Well that sucks.”

“Why?”

“Because I thought I actually had a shot of being with you.”

“It actually doesn’t suck because whatever I said in my sleep is probably true.”

“Well, you said something about being sorry about the other day and you’re being a bitch lately, which I can’t say is untrue.”

“Okay, I gotta get ready for today. I’ll talk to you later.”

“Wait,” Andy called before I went to my bunk, “I just want you to know that you’re really cute when you sleep.”

“I hate you, I hope you know that.”

I put on ripped leggings, a “Punk’s Not Dead” shirt, and black platform shoes and headed out.

I was so distracted with everything that was going on I couldn’t focus on anything. What I said last night kept running through my mind. It gave me no clear answer on what I wanted, only a million more questions. I actually remember everything that happened I just couldn’t admit it to Andy, I couldn’t get his hopes up. My head’s just not where it should be right now. But then again, every time I’m with Andy I feel so okay and it feels so right. I’m stuck. That day seemed like it went on forever and of course, the day I choose to wear pants, is the hottest day of the year.

“So much for putting on makeup.” I mumbled to myself.

It was never a slow day at the merch tent for Black Veil Brides. Every city was as busy as the next and everyone kept asking me if I was the merch girl that sang with them and if I was his girlfriend. The answer was always “Yes, no, and your total is__”.

As soon as I finished my shift I went straight back to the bus.

Black Veil Brides had the last set today so they were just leaving the bus.

“SHIT GUYS WE’RE GONNA BE LATE!” CC yelled as I walked in and I was ambushed by a bunch of guys trying to leave.

I had approximately an hour of quiet time before they came back and Andy bombarded me with questions about last night. I needed to seriously wrap my head around this situation. Last night was so nice and waking up next to him in the morning was a dream but could I really handle all the pressures of being in a relationship right now. I just lost all my friends, my parents, and I’ve gone deeper into depression than I ever have been and I don’t even know why. Besides the fact that Sydnee got my brother to, ya know, everything has been great. I’m on warped tour with my favorite band, I finally get to be myself, and my best friend is probably having the time of her life with Sammi, what more could I ask for. Yeah, it was a shitty end of senior year and I don’t have my family but I’ve got a new family, people who accept who I am and fully support all my decisions. But do I really want to have to worry about someone else when I’m still trying to get my life back on track. But maybe someone holding my hand while I get my life back together is just what I need.

I put on some music to pass the time while I went on tumblr.

“If I’m A Bird” by The Scene Aesthetic came on and I started to sing along: “They said if I think with my heart that I won’t get very far, but that can’t possibly be true. I don’t wanna know what life would be like without you.”

I need Andy.

Notes

heheh its kinda been awhile but im back and i have a couple more chapters written i just want to keep you updated before i go on vacation

Ch Title Creds: Looking Up by Paramore

Windy's Outfit: http://www.polyvore.com/windys_warped_outfit/set?id=126247401