We walked out the door and immediately the butterflies came. I don’t know why they were coming now. They hadn’t come when we first arrived. Then I realized, I don’t belong here. These people are so talented and I’m not. Well I mean, I can kind of play guitar and sing but not very well, I’ve never had lessons or anything.

“Andy wait.” I said.

“Yeah?”

“I can’t do this, you guys are all so talented and in successful bands and I barely made it through high school and I was a total bitch to people like you guys for almost all of it.”

“Honey-I mean-Windy, it’s okay, these are your idols and you know it. You could become best friends with any of your idols, everything you did in high school was fake, this is the real you and this is your opportunity to be yourself, also I know you play guitar I found it while we were cleaning out your room. By the way, that guitar needs some serious tuning and string changing.”

“Hah, yeah I know, and I’m not that good.”

“Hang on let’s go back to the bus for a second, I have an idea.”

“Andy, we’re not hooking up. I'm sorry about what I said earlier but I didn't mean it like that.”

“Oh okay, that's not my plan but I was also worried about what you said but now let's go.”

“Alright whatever you say.”

We walked back and got into the bus. He told me to cover my eyes and sit on the couch. I was slightly scared but I trusted him just enough to let him do this one thing. I'm sure he wouldn't do anything. He came out and he was playing In The End on an acoustic guitar and singing. But not just an acoustic guitar, my acoustic guitar.

“Andy! Did you bring this? Why?!”

“Well I figured since you were going to come on tour with a bunch of musician’s for a few months I thought you could pick up on some tips so I brought your guitar, but now since you said you weren’t that good, I want you to play something for me. What can you play?”

“Umm I don’t know, my best would probably be When You Can’t Sleep At Night by Of Mice and Men. I’ve worked so hard on this song.”

“Let’s hear it.”

“Would you like me to sing too?”

“You sing as well?! Why do you never tell anyone this?”

“I don’t know, I don’t think I’m really that good.”

“I’ll be the judge of that. Now start.”

I played all the way through the song. It was probably the best I’ve played in my life. Well of course it was, I was playing for Andy fucking Biersack. I'm surprised my fingers didn't keep slipping off the strings my hands were sweating so much.

“Windy. What the actual fuck was that?!”

Uh oh…

“You’re fucking amazing. That’s raw talent right there. You’ve never taken lessons?!”

“Uhh no…seriously Andy I’m not that good.”

“I told you I would be the judge of that and that was pretty fucking amazing. Would you like to sing with me on stage for In The End. It’s the last song of our set list and your voice would be perfect.”

“I don’t know, Andy, I’ve never played for anyone before, you’re the first person, not even Lindley. I mean, I could show you In The End but it’s been a while since I’ve played it.”

“Just play the intro and first verse and sing for right now.”

I played it acousticly and harmonized with him for the chorus. It was a little rough but I got through it.

“We’re gonna rehearse tomorrow with the rest of the band. I think I’m just going to have you sing since Ashley might be mad if you steal his solo.”

“Yeah definitely, also I’m kind rough on that song on the guitar so I probably shouldn’t play it, especially since I’ve never played electric.”

"Actually, I was thinking we could make it acoustic, maybe switch it up a little bit. Have our mercy girl come on stage and sing it with us," he laughed.

"Alright whatever you say." I was seriously so nervous there was no way he was getting me on stage.

"Are you ready to go now?”

“I think so.”

“Whatever you do, try to fangirl on the inside and let them introduce themselves to you. Spike up small talk and when in doubt talk about music."

“I don’t know, Andy. I’m not even that amazing everyone here is so successful, I mean they actually had the guts to go and put themselves out there, I barely have the courage to talk in class. Having musical talent isn’t going to impress them if I freeze up every time I try to talk to them.”

“Just stick with me, you’ll do fine.”

All I heard that night was loud music and a lot of drunk band members, I was drunk, but I don’t qualify as a band member.

“Hey, I’m Andy.” The first person he introduced himself to was Matty Mullins of Memphis May Fire. I pretty much flipped. “Oh, and this is Windy, she’s a friend of mine who’s going to be traveling with us and probably working in our merch tent a little.”

“Rad, I’m Matty.” He shook my hand. He. Shook. My. Hand. But I swear I didn't fangirl...too much.

“Aye, Andy, get over here buddy!” Cody called out to him.

“Windy, stay with Matty, if that’s okay with him, I’ll catch up with you later, sound good?”

“Yeah, it’s cool.” Matty said.

“Kay, I’ll catch up with you later.” I replied to Andy.

“Matty, please do not let her out of your sight, I need her back home in one piece.” Andy laughed and left.

“So? You want a drink?” Matty asked.

“Meh, I don’t know, I’m only 18. Hah, who am I kidding I'm already drunk as hell.”

“Aye, chill, it’s fine, I’ll watch you tonight. You got a fake id?”

“Yeah of course, but last time I drank it was bad.”

“I’ll moderate you, be right back.”

“Mmm, okay…” I said unsurely. I stood there for awhile contemplating my last experience with drinking. I was tipsy right now but I could still function alright. Since that last time I'd only ever been tipsy so I'd know what I was doing. Maybe I should explain.

It was prom night my sophomore year. I'd just met Sydnee and she had taken me and Lindley under her wing a few months before. We got back to our hotel rooms with our dates and started drinking and having a good time. Before I knew it my date had taken out some various pills. I couldn't tell what they were but I was too drunk to know the difference between them, we all were. I took one and I didn't feel anything so I took another. I wasn't hurt but my date took four. By that time we were lucky that Lindley hadnt taken any and was only tipsy because he blacked out and wouldn't wake up. She called the cops and took me and Sydnee somewhere else for the night. He was presumed dead the next morning.

Matty returned and we both drank…a lot. It started with a couple shots and then the entire bottle of whiskey. I will forever regret this night.

Notes

meh havent updated for a while but i finished this chapter and getting ready to upload another one

Never Give In, Never Back Down,
~Hailie