*Eliza’s POV*

Hauling around the frothing troll wasn’t as difficult as I’d feared it would be, once Robin pointed out that handy-dandy, agonizing trick of his. He called it a 'pressure point.' No, what really got under my skin was after I set the stupid troll down, so Robin could do it again, as the fucking thing was getting heavy. When I picked that dickhole back up, it fucking well pissed on me!

Now, it would behoove a hostage that insisted on remaining unconscious and frothing an hour after a really rather mild blow, rendering it unable to walk on its fucking own, to be polite enough not to piss all over the person carrying it! At least my shirt had absorbed most of the foulness, so my boots weren’t affected. Fucking shitting elephant scrote!

Fucking cunt of the devil, I stank! I was covered in urine, mystery foam, and troll grime! I wanted a bath! Forget about magical dangers to my person: I was covered in piss! Troll piss! And every time we set it down so I could get a boost, it would leak again! I had to shake it, to try and empty more pee, and get it to run to the ground! What if it shat on me? I was also starting to feel bad for it… But fuck if I was going to wipe it; that was just going too motherfucking-

“-Eliza?” It was Robin, and I noticed his worried expression. I nodded and grunted for him to continue, but looked at the ground as we walked, so he wouldn’t see my eyes, and my tusks would be out of his line of vision, as he was about Andy’s height. Best to alarm him as little as possible.

There was a pause, but I didn’t look up at him, I didn’t want to freak him out. While I could still see perfectly clearly, I knew my eyes looked very bizarre to him. Like 'buzzing insects,' I’d heard. Though compared to my uncle or grandfathers’ eyes during a fight, they hardly compared… “I wanted to apologize for overreacting. It was out of line. Um. It wasn’t from disgust, just surprise. I’ve never seen that before.” Uh, awkward. But heartfelt.

I glanced up at the tall man with his poofy hair. A lot of the men in the Wild Ones seemed to have elaborate man-manes; the women seemed more practical about wearing them held back with thongs. I had to suppress the urge to grin, it made my tusks stick out and look enormous, so I just nodded. “There’s no need, Robin. That you haven’t tried to kill me yet because of it is good enough for me.”

Robin nodded, apparently satisfied, and fell back a ways, bringing up the rear. I resumed my attempts at being stealthy while carrying a troll that was leaking pee down my front, frothing on me, and that weighed more than I did. Thank the gods I had a decent view of Andy’s tight little ass every now and again to cheer me up! Those pants were the tiniest britches I’d seen in my life! I snickered quietly to myself, under my breath.

---

We were met outside the Gates by an even stranger group than I’d anticipated. Blasko was there, along with quite a few (I assumed) Watchmen, including Michelle and Bret, but so were all three Conjuration Healers, Patti the Great Healer, and Rob the Jailer, as well as Papa and his five Nameless Ghouls. Andy stopped us quite a ways from the Gates. The atmosphere was tense and I felt uneasy. I hoped it was just the eerie whistling of the Ghouls.

Blasko, Papa, and Alice all came forward, and the Ghouls trailed a ways behind their master. I was nervous and decided it was probably best not to set the troll down, heavy and piss-covered or not, until I was told to do so.

I was alarmed when Papa grabbed Blasko forcefully by the arm and stopped him in his tracks, at the same time exchanging a glance with Alice. “First Officer, I insist you both wait but a moment to approach. I sense this is my realm of specialty.”

Blasko looked at Alice, who nodded, and Papa floated towards us alone. I wasn’t happy to see his Ghouls had stopped following him. He passed Andy without any acknowledgement, and hovered right in front of me, staring intently at the sputtering troll.

A few minutes passed in silence, and my nerves began to fray. Eventually, Papa spoke, sounding displeased but confident. “Regarding this one and the other. I am correct when I say that this began after they were each taken captive, but not necessarily after the first blow, yes?” After a moment, Andy, Robin, and I all nodded.

“When you killed the other one, did it open its eyes, but remain unmoving and silent?” Again, we all nodded.

Andy had more to add. “It, it cried.”

Papa ignored him. “This one has had no signs of return to consciousness, I assume?” We shook our heads. He looked at me. “You. Do you believe you hit it with enough force to warrant a loss of consciousness for this long in a troll? Forget about the lathering.”

I bit my lip. “I don’t think so but I wouldn’t swear to it. I have a healing cut on my hand.”

Papa narrowed his cadaverous eyes. He looked at me intensely. “I really do hate engaging in selfless, risky acts, you know. Will you be suitably impressed?” He grinned lecherously at me and I was so shocked it must have shown on my face.

Papa chuckled. “Apparently not. Shame. Hold it still.”

Papa reached out with one of his frankly slightly terrifying, hideous hands, towards the face of the troll. I noticed that the Ghouls started swirling around in the air in a frenzied fashion, and started to worry as I tightened my grip on the still very limp troll. Apparently I was just in time.

As soon as Papa’s finger brushed the troll’s forehead, froth erupted into the air, and it started convulsing forcefully! It took everything I had to keep it in my arms! I was barely aware of Papa screeching like a banshee and the stench of burning hair and meat as he flew back a few feet.

After several minutes of preoccupying myself with trying to hold the troll still as it thrashed, it started to settle down. I inspected it, but it appeared, at least physically, unaffected, so I hoped Papa was alright. I looked towards the Gates to see Papa showing Alice and Blasko his hand as they muttered among themselves. I couldn’t tell if Papa was injured… What do you even do when a gast is injured? I supposed, if anyone would know, it would be Alice.

I looked at Andrew, who subtly signaled to me to be patient. I stood, holding the troll, trying to remind myself that duty and all that shit came in many forms, (including being coated in piss, apparently), as Blasko, Alice, and Papa went to go confer with who the fuck else knew further over by the Gates.

Truthfully, given what had just happened, what everyone decided was the very last thing I would have expected. Blasko came walking right up to us! “Well done, Andrew. Eliza, if you could follow the Second Officer and carry the hostage to the interrogation room, Papa says he’s harmless to us.”

I blinked. Andy and I exchanged a look. After a moment’s hesitation, I gathered my wits about me. “Yes, First Officer.” Whatever had just happened, and whatever our orders, I knew both Andy and I were ready to kill this thing the moment it harmed anyone.

Notes

trolls? like this?



no? ;O)