Bullied

"Are you sure that he hasn't hurt you somehow?" Felix asked again
"Yes, he only pulled a little on my shirt - that's it. I'm more worried about you" I said
"No, no, I'm fine. He only pushed me on the wall but that didn't hurt so much"

He lied. I knew his cuts had to bleed again. Kevin way way too rough to not has hurt him somehow.

"May I see your arms?" I tried to sound as friendly as I could.
Felix became nervous. He pulled his sleeves more down and played with them. Again he saw away.
"I don't want to hurt you. It's only to make sure you're not bleeding again. I just want to take care" I told him softly as I placed my hand on his shoulder.
Felix shortly had a look around to check if someone was near us. Then he slowly pulled the sleeve of his left arm up.
It looked a bit better than the day before... and no new cuts to my surprise. No blood. Well, one or two more bruises.
I shortly thought which arm could've been worse. It was easier to cut on your left arm because you're usually using the right hand to do something.
So it made me a little happy that his arm wasn't as bad as I thought.
"Thank you" I said as I carfully pulled his sleeve down again. "Was it as bad as you thought?"
Felix shook his head. He was still nervous... but why?
I saw around. There wasn't anything he could've been afraid of.
Maybe it was just the adrenaline.
"Let's go into our classroom" I said

Felix trembled but I didn't think there was anything he could've been scared of. It had to be the adrenaline.

Were I'm doing the right things? Did I put too much pressure on him? Did I make him feel too unconfortable? Were I'm about to got too far?
I shook my head. No, it was probably the right thing to do. I had to stop doubting so much about myself.
Felix sat down on his chair and took his books out of his bag - still trembling as hell..
I had to somehow make him becoming clamer again.

"Hey, Felix" I got his attention "Do you like drawing?"
He shrugged "I do but I'm not really good at it"
I took a piece of paper "Neither am I. It's just for fun"
I painted two really awful ducks on it "Look, it's me and you" I joked.
Felix giggled a little - then made them wear hats and sunglasses "Now we're so much cooler"
I laughed.

I think Felix could've been a real sunshine if the bullshit with his class didn't make him that sad and shy. I knew he had to still be it on his inside.
What a waste of a wonderful person.

I made another duck - a little smaller that the other two and it wore a hat witches always wear.
"Look, it's my sister" I joked again
"You have a sister?"
I nodded
"She's lucky to have such a nice brother"

Oh my... this was really cute. I couldn't help but smile.

He painted another small duck on the piece of paper "She used her magical gift to make me a brother"

The duck he made was way better than mine. In general he could draw better than me.
The more I knew Felix the less I understood why everyone hated him.

"Do you have a brother?" I asked him
but he shook his head "No, I'm an only child... It was cool to have one"
I laughed "Believe me - it's not always that fun"
"I know but everything has its negative side. ...And I think it's worth it"

Felix was awesome. I mean he had so many hidden talents and a heart made of pure gold.
Impossible to hate him...
I saw at his face (as much as he showed it). He wasn't even ugly and absolutely not chubby.

As I stared at him I realized he held his pen with his left hand.
"Are you a left-hander?" I asked
He just nodded

Wait... he wrote with his left hand... means he...

"Would you please show me your arm?" I asked him of all sudden
"You already saw it" he answered
"But only the left one"

He became nervous again - a short look to see if someone was around us but our classroom was empty (they were all hanging out outside).
Felix hesitated but then grabbed his right sleeve and pulled it slowly up. I saw how he trembled. He had to fight a lot.
I softly pushed his hand away and pushed the sleeve carefully up on my own.

It was the first time I saw his right arm. The day before he only showed me the left.
On this side the cuts were deeper, the bruises were purple but still as many as on the other side and I think he cut this morning again.
I knew it - some old cuts were opened again.

Why?
How?

It just made no sense that someone so perfect was so fucked up. So hated.

I felt how his hand became colder and he trembled more. Felix bit heavily on his lip. The cuts had to burn like hell... and I think it also hurt him that I saw him that weak.
Of course I felt a little guilty but I couldn't just watch how he suffered and struggled. I felt so sorry for him.

"We need to clean your wounds" I told him "or it's going to hurt more later"
"I-I always have something with me. I u-usually clean every new one" Felix stuttered as he took his arm out of my grip. He pulled a bandage and a disinfectant spray out.

I didn't know if I was supposed to find it good or sad that he had to bring stuff like that to school.
But at this moment I was happy he had something to clean it. It looked a bit infected.

"I'm doing it for you, ok?" I told him as I took his hand again to make him hold still. Then I quickly sprayed the spray on his wounds and put the bandage on.
Felix just whined a litte but not really much. I understand that - I mean disinfecting burnes like fire.

I wanted to ask him why he doesn't tell me who did the bruises to him but then I realized:
He never told me something on his own. There was always something which forced him to do it. Maybe it was better to wait until he says something without any reasons.
I already knew so much about him after only one day.

It was weird to wait and do nothing but now it's his turn to trust me. I thinks so.

Notes

A long chapter x')
I really have to move on - it's still day two :D