They don't need to understand

Andy~

We got her back to the house and Ash ran to the bathroom to start a warm bath....

I got up there an he helped me take her cloths off... God she was so thin.... I need to get her help.... I placed her in the tub and started running the water over her head... Praying that it would work... I checked her pulse and was relieved when I found one.

After a while she started to come to.. I sighed out of relief, Once she realized where she was she freaked out and covered her self "Wh-Why are you watching me" she said quietly... "I was just-" "No... Leave... Im fine" I sighed and got up placing some cloths down on the counter and walked out....

Meridia~

I watched them leave and relaxed, I stepped out of the tub and everything came crashing in at once and I was remembering... My mother... Andys father... It's my fault... I said I wished she was dead.... I did this... Its my fault.... I got dressed and headed to my room and found my box... the one blade I had left.... My salvation I grabbed my small bottle of whisky and took some swigs from it, just to numb me a little bit "Merry Christmas mom..."

*Triggering*

I ran into my bathroom and slid down the wall, I thought quickly and ran to lock my door.

I ran back into my bathroom and then locked that door too, just in case..... I finally opened the box and sighed "Its been a while... Merry-fucking-Christmass to me...." I placed the blade to the inner part of my wrist and flicked it across.... I did that about 10 more times before rolling my sleeve back down and hiding my blade again.... Feeling the stress and sadness leave for a little... My wrist had a dull pain in it, i went and curled up in my bed, fineshing off the small bottle before i did so... and tried to sleep, but to no avail... so I just laid there... completely numb... emotionless... and silent....

*End of Triggering*

An hour later I heard the doorbell ring and then heard the rest of the band com in.I heard Andy explaining what happened and that brought on more tears, And soon I was sobbing into my pillow, Around n hour later they were starting to get louder.. N i knew instantly that they were drunk... Just then there was a knock on my door "Mer- *hick* Meridia... Are you o-*hick* okay?" I heard An unfamiliar voice slur "Matt, dude... just leave her...." I heard Andy whisper...

I heard my door handle jiggle and then Andy's voice "Meridia... Are you okay?" He asked a little worried, I didn't answer and he tried to open my door again "Meridia.. Please open the door," Panic rose in his voice as he shook the door harder, Suddenly he booted it down and ran in... he took one look at me and ran over "Mer... Meridia... Please look at me...." he said crouching down, I just laid there "Oh god please... not you too" he freaked checking my pulse tears rising in his eye's. I let out a big sigh when he realized I was still alive "it's my fault... Im sorry.... You hate me now dont you...." I said barely above a whisper.... "Mh'no... S'not your fault.... You didnt make this happen...." I shook my head no and let the tears fall.. I pushed my face into my pillow and sobbed again I felt his hand on my back and he was making 'shushing' noises "Hey... Why dont you come down stairs.. have a couple drinks. I reluctantly nodded my head and sat up, he helped me to my feet and we walked into the living room "HEY its Meridia!'' CC shouted


I sat down on the couch beside Ashley and Andy poured me a drink.

3 mixed drinks and 5 shots later I was shit faced... and everyone but Ashley n I were asleep

"Yo-you know wut" I slurred and he looked at me "Hmmm." He sounded annoyed, i think he was sober I looked over at him, and started to feel shittier "N-Never mind...." I said standing up and walking to my room closing the door and sliding down to the floor, letting the tears fall, I hard Ash get up and walk to another spare room, once I was sure he wasnt coming back out I tip toed my was out into the living room, Checking the time on my way by,,, 5:28 am... December 25.... By now I was sobering up, and I hated it..... I looked around until I saw a half full bottle of Jack Daniels, I cracked it open and started guzzling it letting everything that has gone wrong come crashing in on me, I started to cry... for the 5th time.. a few minutes later I heard A door opened and out came Andy "What are you doing Mer" he asked coming fully into the room "No-Nothing" I slurred, gulping another few sips down, "Don't feed me that bullshit, Give me that" he said reaching for the bottle of Jack "NO!" I shouted jumping away from him "Shtop!" I said a little quieter still backing away from him "Mer, You cant drink away your problems" he said reaching out to me, I swallowed thickly "No, but I can sure as hell try" I sad chugging back the rest of the bottle as he was fighting it get it out of my hands but to no avail, I finished the bottle, and he backed away a somber look in his eyes "You want the damn bottle?" I half shouted, Then I threw it at him, Just missing his head then broke on the wall "Fucking take it, im done" I stumbled towards the door hearing the rest got out of there rooms, and hearing Andy call after me, but I didnt listen, Just kept walking......

Andy~

"Dude, what the fuck just happened" Ash asked rubbing his eyes, I was contemplating on telling them the full story.. But decided to keep that secret for now....

"Uh.. Meridia, Just... Uhhh... Broke down then left...." I was still in shock form what just happened "Well we cant just stand here, She ran out in shorts and her half top" Ashley yelled reaching for his coat running out the front door, I and the rest of the band running after him..

Notes

Oh my gosh guys im so sorry, Its been what? Almost over a year?
I promise Ill be updating more, If any of you are still readiung this