Catch me when I fall?
Chapter 11 ~ The Truth
~Jinxx's POV~
It turned out that Allie had gone to bed as I had walked in, which made me relieved a little, it sounds bad but it gave me more time; to think about what I would say to her. After speaking to the guys for a while they had caught me up. They filled me in and told me that Allie had freaked out and called them kidnappers and had a panic attack, I know I couldn't really judge her actions because I didn't know her as well as I thought I did. But it did seem unlike the Allie I had met that night, maybe it wasn't her I doubted myself. Whilst she had this panic attack she had flinched away from CC and Andy had to calm her down which is probably why Andy had stalked off upstairs when I had come in. To check on her, things like this always got to him and he always felt like he needed to take care of people.
As the night droned on everyone started to head to their bunks, leaving me and Jake who sat drinking and chatting about tour, Ella, Allie and tomorrows show. Jake had insomnia which meant if I was ever troubled he would be listening at whatever time we were both up to in the morning.
"Do you think she will come to the next date with us?" Jake asked. Looking at me as we were on the topic of Allie.
"Man I don't know, I haven't met her yet" I lied. Waving my hand dismissively. Truth is I didn't want to tell the guys about what happened because they would treat her differently.
"She seems pretty cool, I think you'll get along great with her" He said downing the last of his drink, before scooting out of the booth.
"Maybe, only time will tell" I shrugged.
After Jake left for bed I sat in the booth staring into oblivion, playing different scenarios in my head of how it would go, the one where she hit me or ran off played constantly in my head. So did the one where she would run to Andy and Juliet and beg them to keep me away from her, like I was some sort of monster. If she thought that I don't think I could live with myself. Since that night a part of me had always been drawn to Allie, it had yearned for her like a piece of me that was missing. I'd never know if she felt the same, I barely knew her after that night. What had become of her, I'd often Googled her to keep tabs on her; to check if she ever relapsed. But I'd never found anything.
When I finally did wander up to the bunks I couldn't help but stop near my bunk, where I knew Allie was sleeping. I touched the curtain and sighed, I was so close but so far away at the same time. I would have loved to have pulled the curtain back to just see her sleeping peacefully and climbed in with her and held her. I was broken out of this trance when I heard someone stir and snore in another bunk, this was my cue to move on and go to sleep. Which I did.
In the morning I woke up with a splitting headache, on tour sleep was precious because you were up until god knew what hour then there is most likely to be fans chattering outside your window. This morning was different, it seemed quieter as if the sky was clear before a brewing storm. I clicked the button to open the blind at the side of my bunk, to have a look at my surroundings before I got out of my bunk. It wasn't a clear day today in England it was grey as usual. I closed the blind and closed my eyes listening to the snores of the crew. I was petrified to face Allie today, Still I was scared to face what the guys would say too, my best friends and I hadn't told them. Deciding to face the day I sighed and got out of my bunk.
~Flashback~
"Allie..." Jinxx panicked and stood up straight, suddenly and quickly alert. "Please think this through"
"I have" she whispered. Feeling herself beginning to break down.
The scene from afar was a terrifying one, on lookers would look in terror as a girl close to an alternative looking angel stared ahead of her, one arm held on to a lamp post, gripping it so hard her pale skin was the perfect white with strain. Whilst her other arm was stretched far and wide to her side almost forming an imaginary wing. The wind blew her white blonde hair wildly arounf her face, she looked majestic but in a painfully beautiful way. It was deadly. Next to her stood a contrast, a dark mysterious figure, Some people think that darkness is evil and light is innocent and good.But that night the on lookers would see the two innocent souls for what they were. Broken.
"Allie... please!" Jinxx repeated to me.
"Jinxx... I can't do this anymore" I cried finally letting the tears spill down my face, wetting my cheeks.
"You can" he soothed " you're stronger than you think Allie" for a moment I believed him, this man with an innocent face and these beautiful blue eyes. But only for a moment.
"HOW CAN YOU KNOW THAT" I screamed making him flinch before he slowly moved over to me inch by inch.
"I don't for sure" he admitted, holding out his hand "but if you take my hand, I'll show you that you are" he smiled at me full of hope and willing.
I shook my head violently, the tears like razors down my face. I edged closer to the edge, moving away from him. Still clutching the lamp post until that last moment.
"Allie look at me" he pleaded with me.
I shook my head more before I finally looked at him, with the wind blowing in my face. I turned to him with my tear stained cheeks, at that moment I was his and he was mine. At that moment I looked at him, into his sky blue eyes and let the lamp post go. I felt myself fall and scream a silent scream. I also heard his intake of breath as a slammed into something hard, knocking the air from my chest casting black oblivion into my eyes. I never felt the water hit me, and heaven was dark or maybe this was hell. I was cold and my arm was being pulled from its socket, tearing and ripping me apart. Only, the oblivion was shattered when I heard my name being screamed and shouted at me through the fog. Hope. I opened my eyes to a blurred vision, and through the ringing in my ears I heard a mans voice, begging me to hold on as my lungs burned in my chest. It felt like I had began to drown, I was looking for a surface but all I seen was a blurred dark figure in black.
~End of Flashback~
It turned out that Allie had gone to bed as I had walked in, which made me relieved a little, it sounds bad but it gave me more time; to think about what I would say to her. After speaking to the guys for a while they had caught me up. They filled me in and told me that Allie had freaked out and called them kidnappers and had a panic attack, I know I couldn't really judge her actions because I didn't know her as well as I thought I did. But it did seem unlike the Allie I had met that night, maybe it wasn't her I doubted myself. Whilst she had this panic attack she had flinched away from CC and Andy had to calm her down which is probably why Andy had stalked off upstairs when I had come in. To check on her, things like this always got to him and he always felt like he needed to take care of people.
As the night droned on everyone started to head to their bunks, leaving me and Jake who sat drinking and chatting about tour, Ella, Allie and tomorrows show. Jake had insomnia which meant if I was ever troubled he would be listening at whatever time we were both up to in the morning.
"Do you think she will come to the next date with us?" Jake asked. Looking at me as we were on the topic of Allie.
"Man I don't know, I haven't met her yet" I lied. Waving my hand dismissively. Truth is I didn't want to tell the guys about what happened because they would treat her differently.
"She seems pretty cool, I think you'll get along great with her" He said downing the last of his drink, before scooting out of the booth.
"Maybe, only time will tell" I shrugged.
After Jake left for bed I sat in the booth staring into oblivion, playing different scenarios in my head of how it would go, the one where she hit me or ran off played constantly in my head. So did the one where she would run to Andy and Juliet and beg them to keep me away from her, like I was some sort of monster. If she thought that I don't think I could live with myself. Since that night a part of me had always been drawn to Allie, it had yearned for her like a piece of me that was missing. I'd never know if she felt the same, I barely knew her after that night. What had become of her, I'd often Googled her to keep tabs on her; to check if she ever relapsed. But I'd never found anything.
When I finally did wander up to the bunks I couldn't help but stop near my bunk, where I knew Allie was sleeping. I touched the curtain and sighed, I was so close but so far away at the same time. I would have loved to have pulled the curtain back to just see her sleeping peacefully and climbed in with her and held her. I was broken out of this trance when I heard someone stir and snore in another bunk, this was my cue to move on and go to sleep. Which I did.
In the morning I woke up with a splitting headache, on tour sleep was precious because you were up until god knew what hour then there is most likely to be fans chattering outside your window. This morning was different, it seemed quieter as if the sky was clear before a brewing storm. I clicked the button to open the blind at the side of my bunk, to have a look at my surroundings before I got out of my bunk. It wasn't a clear day today in England it was grey as usual. I closed the blind and closed my eyes listening to the snores of the crew. I was petrified to face Allie today, Still I was scared to face what the guys would say too, my best friends and I hadn't told them. Deciding to face the day I sighed and got out of my bunk.
~Flashback~
"Allie..." Jinxx panicked and stood up straight, suddenly and quickly alert. "Please think this through"
"I have" she whispered. Feeling herself beginning to break down.
The scene from afar was a terrifying one, on lookers would look in terror as a girl close to an alternative looking angel stared ahead of her, one arm held on to a lamp post, gripping it so hard her pale skin was the perfect white with strain. Whilst her other arm was stretched far and wide to her side almost forming an imaginary wing. The wind blew her white blonde hair wildly arounf her face, she looked majestic but in a painfully beautiful way. It was deadly. Next to her stood a contrast, a dark mysterious figure, Some people think that darkness is evil and light is innocent and good.But that night the on lookers would see the two innocent souls for what they were. Broken.
"Allie... please!" Jinxx repeated to me.
"Jinxx... I can't do this anymore" I cried finally letting the tears spill down my face, wetting my cheeks.
"You can" he soothed " you're stronger than you think Allie" for a moment I believed him, this man with an innocent face and these beautiful blue eyes. But only for a moment.
"HOW CAN YOU KNOW THAT" I screamed making him flinch before he slowly moved over to me inch by inch.
"I don't for sure" he admitted, holding out his hand "but if you take my hand, I'll show you that you are" he smiled at me full of hope and willing.
I shook my head violently, the tears like razors down my face. I edged closer to the edge, moving away from him. Still clutching the lamp post until that last moment.
"Allie look at me" he pleaded with me.
I shook my head more before I finally looked at him, with the wind blowing in my face. I turned to him with my tear stained cheeks, at that moment I was his and he was mine. At that moment I looked at him, into his sky blue eyes and let the lamp post go. I felt myself fall and scream a silent scream. I also heard his intake of breath as a slammed into something hard, knocking the air from my chest casting black oblivion into my eyes. I never felt the water hit me, and heaven was dark or maybe this was hell. I was cold and my arm was being pulled from its socket, tearing and ripping me apart. Only, the oblivion was shattered when I heard my name being screamed and shouted at me through the fog. Hope. I opened my eyes to a blurred vision, and through the ringing in my ears I heard a mans voice, begging me to hold on as my lungs burned in my chest. It felt like I had began to drown, I was looking for a surface but all I seen was a blurred dark figure in black.
~End of Flashback~
Notes
So we know the truth. Like I said guys this is the first fan fiction I've ever got this far with so I know it might be crappy and repetitive but I'm sorry!
Thank you for the support and patience! Since I've got a job I've found it hard to update which is why I've been trying to make this chapter longer! I'm still trying to figure out how to make Jinxx and Allie finally meeting dramatic without being boring and over done. So comments are appreciated! I need feedback!
Love youu!
I can't wait to read more. I'm so addicted to this story
12/24/14