We know our wings are flawed.
A turn for the worst
A heard a loud bang coming from downstairs, i opened my eyes squinting at the sunlight that filled my room. I tried to sit up but i felt a sharp pain in my stomach and my arms collapsed and i fell to the floor. i heard footsteps leading to my bedroom door which was probably still locked, the key turned in the lock and my door flew open.
"By the looks of things im guessing you learned your lesson Lindsey" My dad smirked. i nodded in shame, he walked over a put a plate of toast on the floor next to me without saying a word.
"Thank you" i said. He still did not speak, he simply walked out of the room shutting the door behind him, but this time not locking it. I looked at my clock, it was 11am, i sighed and grabbed onto the table to help me stand up. i looked in the mirror at all my cuts and bruises, i sighed again and opened my bedroom door and walked into the bathroom. i filled a bowl with hot water and got a cloth and carried them into my room, shutting the door behind me. i dipped the cloth in hot water and began cleaning up my face, it stung a little but it was better than having blood all over my face. The water went a cloudy red colour, once my face was clean. i got out some fresh clothes and took off my shirt, i had serious bruising all over my arms and stomach, what was i going to do now, i looked an absolute reck. i put on my fresh shirt and lay back down on the floor. i had hidden a bottle of sleeping tablets in my draw. i threw a couple in my mouth, swallowed them and lay back down... i soon fell asleep
My eyes slowly opened again to find it was already dark outside, it was 8pm. Wow did i really sleep for that long i thought. I pulled out my phone and plugged in my headphones. i put on saviour and closed my eyes, all i could think about was jinxx. Tears flowing down my cheeks, thoughts going round and round in my head. i knew this time i couldn't go on any longer....
I took out a blade and starting cutting away at my arms until they bled heavily, without jinxx i knew it was the end. I got my whole tube of antidepressant pills and tipped them all in my mouth and swallowed. i sat up for a minute or so.
"this is it" i whispered. i suddenly passed out and fell to the ground..........
I could hear some noise in the backgroud and i wondered whether is was dead or not but then i heard Jinxx's voice but i was unable to move or open my eyes, what is going on i thought. i continued to listen carefully, i heard crying.... IT WAS JINXX
"Please don't leave me" he begged
"Please keep fighting" he sobbed
"i can't go on without you so please please dont give up". I felt him kiss my hand, then i felt as though someone was hovering above me. Jinxx kissed my lips and suddenly i was able to move my fingers, he shouted all the guys and they all came running in.
"everyone be quiet, she is coming around" he yelled.
i slowly opened my eyes, squinting at the bright lights that filled the room. when my eyes had adjusted to the light i looked straight at jinxx, grabbed his arm and pulled him in to kiss me, even though all the guys were watching i didnt care. our lips met once again.
"when did you too become y'know" Jake asked
"for a while now" jinxx replied
"You guys can keep it a secret right" i asked
"course we can" said ash hapily
Andy didnt seem too happy about this, maybe he liked me but to be honest that wasnt my main concern at the moment
"can you guys give me and Lindsey some time alone" jinxx smiled
"Sure we will go wait outside" said CC.
"Look at your poor face, i should never have let you leave" jinxx said dropping his head
"it fine Jinxx, i love you so much" i said kissing his hand
"Please dont ever do that again" he sobbed
"I wont i promise" i whispered
"We leave for tour today Lindsey but i can postpone the shows if you are not going to be okay" he said
"No its okay, you go have fun, ill be just fine" i whispered
"i love you so much Lindsey, let me have your number and i will call you everyday" he said. he passed me a pen and i wrote my number down on his hand.
"I love you so much jinxx" i said, he kissed my lips and waved goodbye from the doorway. A single tear ran down my cheek and i closed my eyes and thought about him kissing me again
"I love you, i whispered to myself.....
"By the looks of things im guessing you learned your lesson Lindsey" My dad smirked. i nodded in shame, he walked over a put a plate of toast on the floor next to me without saying a word.
"Thank you" i said. He still did not speak, he simply walked out of the room shutting the door behind him, but this time not locking it. I looked at my clock, it was 11am, i sighed and grabbed onto the table to help me stand up. i looked in the mirror at all my cuts and bruises, i sighed again and opened my bedroom door and walked into the bathroom. i filled a bowl with hot water and got a cloth and carried them into my room, shutting the door behind me. i dipped the cloth in hot water and began cleaning up my face, it stung a little but it was better than having blood all over my face. The water went a cloudy red colour, once my face was clean. i got out some fresh clothes and took off my shirt, i had serious bruising all over my arms and stomach, what was i going to do now, i looked an absolute reck. i put on my fresh shirt and lay back down on the floor. i had hidden a bottle of sleeping tablets in my draw. i threw a couple in my mouth, swallowed them and lay back down... i soon fell asleep
My eyes slowly opened again to find it was already dark outside, it was 8pm. Wow did i really sleep for that long i thought. I pulled out my phone and plugged in my headphones. i put on saviour and closed my eyes, all i could think about was jinxx. Tears flowing down my cheeks, thoughts going round and round in my head. i knew this time i couldn't go on any longer....
I took out a blade and starting cutting away at my arms until they bled heavily, without jinxx i knew it was the end. I got my whole tube of antidepressant pills and tipped them all in my mouth and swallowed. i sat up for a minute or so.
"this is it" i whispered. i suddenly passed out and fell to the ground..........
I could hear some noise in the backgroud and i wondered whether is was dead or not but then i heard Jinxx's voice but i was unable to move or open my eyes, what is going on i thought. i continued to listen carefully, i heard crying.... IT WAS JINXX
"Please don't leave me" he begged
"Please keep fighting" he sobbed
"i can't go on without you so please please dont give up". I felt him kiss my hand, then i felt as though someone was hovering above me. Jinxx kissed my lips and suddenly i was able to move my fingers, he shouted all the guys and they all came running in.
"everyone be quiet, she is coming around" he yelled.
i slowly opened my eyes, squinting at the bright lights that filled the room. when my eyes had adjusted to the light i looked straight at jinxx, grabbed his arm and pulled him in to kiss me, even though all the guys were watching i didnt care. our lips met once again.
"when did you too become y'know" Jake asked
"for a while now" jinxx replied
"You guys can keep it a secret right" i asked
"course we can" said ash hapily
Andy didnt seem too happy about this, maybe he liked me but to be honest that wasnt my main concern at the moment
"can you guys give me and Lindsey some time alone" jinxx smiled
"Sure we will go wait outside" said CC.
"Look at your poor face, i should never have let you leave" jinxx said dropping his head
"it fine Jinxx, i love you so much" i said kissing his hand
"Please dont ever do that again" he sobbed
"I wont i promise" i whispered
"We leave for tour today Lindsey but i can postpone the shows if you are not going to be okay" he said
"No its okay, you go have fun, ill be just fine" i whispered
"i love you so much Lindsey, let me have your number and i will call you everyday" he said. he passed me a pen and i wrote my number down on his hand.
"I love you so much jinxx" i said, he kissed my lips and waved goodbye from the doorway. A single tear ran down my cheek and i closed my eyes and thought about him kissing me again
"I love you, i whispered to myself.....
I'm crying. :'(
10/21/14