The Secret Submissive

“C’mon Ash, think about it. You all noticed the change in me the past week. Especially you. I’m not as tense, I’m opening up more. I’ve stopped drinking myself to death. It’s all because of her.”
“Why didn’t you talk to one of us instead? We’re your friends Jinxx, we’re here for you no matter what the problem is.”
“I couldn’t. I don’t know why but it was like a lock was there, keeping it all in, and I couldn’t find the key. She shattered that lock. I feel better, I feel like myself again.”
“I still don’t understand why. What brought you to all this.”
“You know what happened between me and Sammi, the cheating the lying. It was all because of that. I was searching for someone to shatter the shell I’ve put up over the years, Sammi couldn’t do it so we started having problems. We started looking for what we didn’t have in other people. I was still on my search to find someone that could understand my needs. I met Nessa in the bar, and before I even had my first shot she asked me what was wrong. I immediately went into defensive mode, shook my head and told her nothing. As I went to take the shot, she put her hand on my wrist to stop me and asked me again. It was like the damn broke, and all my emotions came pouring out.”
“I explained to him what I did and how I might be able to help him. That’s what all this is about Ash, helping him.”
“How is beating him helping him?”
“Maybe I should explain this to you. I’m not like other doms out there. I don’t enjoy putting people through pain, actually most doms, real doms, don’t. It’s about pushing the limits of pleasure. There is a fine line between pain and pleasure and I bring him to that line. What gets me off, is the control of his pleasure, the control of bringing him there. He can be punished if he does something he’s not supposed to but even then, his punishment may lean more towards pain, but it’s still pleasurable.”
“It’s sick, and twisted.”
“Ash, you’re my friend, my brother. But you don’t have to like what I do. Just because it’s not your thing doesn’t mean it’s not mine. I’m enjoying this. All you have to do is accept it. And not tell anyone else.”
“You want me to keep this from the guys. No, not happening. If they knew about this, they would have your head, and hers.”
“Ash, I swear if you ruin this for me, I will never speak to you again.”
His eyes widen in shock, and hurt. “You would choose this, and her, over me and the guys.”
“I’m doing this for me. I’ve never felt more alive Ash. It’s just for 3 months, for now at least. You need to sign a confidentiality agreement. If you tell anyone else, if anyone finds out. My contract is void. And I lose all of this.”
Nessa slide the agreement, and a pen, over to him. He hangs his head in his hands conflicted. A single tear rolls down his face. “I can’t do this Jinxx, what if something happens.”
“Nothing bad is going to happen to him Ash, I care for him. I would never hurt him like that. I promise you, everything I do to him is strictly pleasurable. For both him and me.”
“Ash, she won’t hurt me.”
He shakes his head in understanding. “Fine, I’ll sign it, and I won’t tell anyone. But I want to know what goes on. I want to be the one you talk to about this. And I swear Nessa, if anything happens to him, this agreement will go right out the window.”
I look at Nessa, we both look at Ash, and we both say “Ok.” He signs his name at the bottom of the agreement and stands to leave. I still had to find out why he was here.
“By the way Ash, how did you know I was even here?”
“Oh, ha yeah, well, a…umm…friend lives across the street.”
“You’re fucking Trish?” Nessa looked shocked.
“Uh yeah, why?”
“Be careful with that one, and make sure you use a condom. She’s fucked almost every guy in LA, god only knows what std that slut is carrying.”
“You contract random men, how do I know you aren’t carrying one.”
“I always get blood tests done on the men I contract, ask Jinxx, he got one. And I get one done on me as well for reassurance to them.”
“Oh. Well then, thankfully I did use a condom. I guess I won’t be going back to her though.”
His eyebrows come together in the middle of his forehead and he shivers from disgust. “I can always hook you up with one of my friends?”
“Are they like you?”
“No, well, yes but its beginner bondage, and they don’t use whips.”
“Ok, no more. Let the info I got today sink in before I hear any more.” We laugh and he smiles.
“I’ll walk out with you Ash, I was heading home anyways. You wanna stop by?”
“Yeah sure Jinxx, maybe we can talk a bit more about this.”
“Yeah ok.” I turn and give Nessa a quick kiss goodbye and head out the door.
~
“Alright Jinxx, spill it. What goes on between you to when the doors are closed?”
“You really want to know?”
“Yes.”
I explained the past week to him and what went on today. How the trainer is helping, the contract, damn near everything. Every once in a while he would ask a question, but otherwise he just listened. It was nice to actually be able to talk to someone about this.
“Can I see the welts?”
“Sure the ones on my chest, but I’m not whipping my dick out for you.”
“Good to know.” I showed him the marks on my chest, they were barely there. “I thought they would be a lot worse.”
“I told you she didn’t hurt me. And she does care for me after. Ash I’m telling you, I haven’t felt this good in ages.”
“It’s just so much to take in. But don’t worry, I signed the agreement. I won’t say anything. Just make sure you talk to me about this. And one more question. What if she starts taking it too far?”
“There is a safeword, if she really is pushing it too far. Some of the things she does, I might say stop but it’s my minds automatic reaction, even though I might not actually want her to stop. A safeword is put into play so I have to really think about it. And if I want her to stop, I use it.”
“What is it?”
“Black.”

Notes

sorry, i couldn't get the site to work last night.