Twisted Reality

After their impromptu trip to Wal-Mart, the guys took the newly de-aged Andy and Ash back to the bus. Alongside clothes that fit them, there were other essentials that needed to be put into the kitchen for storage until they got to CC’s house and Jake’s apartment, which Jinxx’d moved into with him. Once they were back in LA, they’d get things like a kids’ bed for the pint-sized bassist, as well as essential nursery furniture to use for the infant frontman for the time being.

The moment they got back on the bus, the multi-instrumentalist had to heat up a bottle for Andy, who was crying in hunger again, while the drummer put away their purchases and his lover got the infant’s car seat set up. They couldn’t let him just lay around like he normally would, as he could get thrown about like a rag doll and seriously injured if Jon had to slam on breaks, make a sudden lane-change, or anything of that nature. They’d agreed not to stock up on juice and baby food until they got back to LA as well, even though they estimated him to be about seven months in age at the moment. That would cut down on everything they had to store and subsequently take back off the bus upon their arrival.

While CC put everything away in the kitchen cabinets and got Ash to come back to the bunk room to help him fold and put away the few clothes they’d bought, Jake worked on getting the carrier and its base set up. That was easier said than done since they had nothing to strap the base into, although he thought Andy would be relatively safe just strapped into the carrier they’d found that he fit in.

Jinxx sat on the couch in the living area, gently cradling his friend’s tiny body and cooing to him as he held the bottle he drank from. The baby wrapped his tiny hands around the bottle, soon managing to hold it on his own, which added strength to their estimation of his age. Most babies couldn’t hold a bottle on their own as well as he was until they were between six and eight months old, but he was nearly the size of a nine-month-old since his frame as an adult was so big. That and once he’d drained the eight-ounce bottle of its contents, he needed no other help burping than having his belly pressed against the quiet man’s shoulder.

“What’s the matter, Andy?” he asked when he started crying again. He quickly checked the diaper he’d put on him in the Wal-Mart bathroom, only to find that it was neither wet, nor dirty. “Are you still hungry?”

Andy seemed to stop crying for a moment, although tears still glittered in his icy-blue eyes.

“All right, I’ll make you another bottle,” Jinxx sighed, moving to get off the couch.

“You want me to hold him while you do that?” Jake asked.

“Yeah, if you’re done with the carrier,” the multi-instrumentalist answered, nodding. “He seems to get heavier after a while.”

The baby seemed to have an indignant look on his face as he was transferred from one man’s arms to the other’s.

“He wasn’t insulting you, Andy,” the guitarist swore. “But having to support your weight while you’re laying back does make our arms tired after a while.”

He appeared to have a thoughtful expression for a moment, then one like he’d use when he shrugged at them while saying “Whatever”.

“Can I hold him, Jake?”

Turning, they both saw that Ash and CC had returned from folding and storing their new clothes in the bunk room.

“Sure. C’mon over here on the couch with me,” he answered, using one hand to take the little boy’s while the other supported their frontman’s little body. “Let’s see if he can hold his head up on his own. If not, I’ll show you how you have to support it for him.”

“Sheesh,” CC sighed, leaning against one of the kitchen counters while his friend made another bottle. “Who knew that taking care of kids could be so tiring?”

“What makes it harder is that they’re our friends; we already know their adult habits, but they obviously can’t use them while in the bodies of a baby and child,” the multi-instrumentalist agreed.

“Seriously. Ash has already complained of a headache, but I can’t think of anything we have on the bus to give him that won’t hurt him in his current state,” he said.

“Why didn’t he say anything at Wal-Mart? We could’ve gotten Children’s Motrin or something,” Jinxx told him.

“If it was a hangover, I’d think he would’ve said something as soon as he woke up,” he agreed. “Maybe his head didn’t hurt until we got back to the bus, and by then, it would’ve been too late.”

“That’s true enough.” He turned back to the stove, which he’d stuck the bottle into a pot of water on to warm. “All right. The bottle’s warm enough, so let’s get back to the other room.”

Nodding his agreement once again, CC headed in there first so he could take a seat on the floor. Jake was already sitting on the couch next to their pint-sized bassist, who held Andy in his lap, his arms wrapped tightly enough around his waist to avoid dropping him, but not so tightly that he hurt him. The baby’s already bright eyes lit up even more when he spotted Jinxx and his bottle, and he reached out toward him eagerly. Since he wasn’t moving very much and Ash seemed to have a good enough grip on him, he decided that he could keep him in his lap while he downed another bottle.

The multi-instrumentalist took a seat in the armchair next to the couch, keeping a sharp eye on the two children while the baby continued to eat. His lover stayed right next to them, appearing to scoot closer just in case their infant frontman began to choke, but allowed them to work together to get the little guy fed. They all wanted them to feel as independent as they could, considering the circumstances.

Andy happily drained his bottle again, screwing his face up until the guitarist took him from his would-be lover long enough to burp him. Once again, he needed no additional help beyond having his belly pressed against the man’s shoulder to get the air out, and sighed in his ear softly as he rested his head on his shoulder. Jake chuckled softly as he checked his diaper, which prompted him to get up and carrying him into the bunk room, presumably to change him.

“What’s he doing, Jinxx?” the pint-sized bassist asked, sound curious and worried.

“He’s changing his diaper, Ashy,” he chuckled, ruffling his still shoulder-length hair. “Even though he’s in a baby’s body, he still has the mind of an adult, like you.”

“So he took him to the bunk room for privacy?” Ash asked.

“I’d assume so. He’s already not going to like Jake seeing his privates, but I’m pretty sure he’s figured out that there’s nothing he can do about it right now,” Jinxx answered, nodding.

“Think it’s still appropriate for him to play the games we’ve got on the bus?” CC piped up, his face screwed up in thought.

“I don’t see why not. He’s only got the body of a child, not the mind,” the multi-instrumentalist answered after a moment’s thought. “It’s not like he’s once again completely innocent and at risk of being corrupted in ways a seven-year-old shouldn’t be by them.”

“You wanna play Black Ops with me for a while, Ash?” the drummer asked, turning to him.

“Yeah! Let’s go!” he answered excitedly.

Jinxx chuckled as he watched them get their game set up, his lover soon returning with a somewhat unhappy-looking Andy. It was obvious that the infant frontman wasn’t happy with the guitarist having to see him in such an intimate setting during the diaper change, but the look in his eyes said that he understood why. He even did his best to cross his arms, making the pair chuckle at his unsuccessful attempt. That made him frown even more and pout in a way that was even cuter than when he pouted as an adult. Laughing softly, the multi-instrumentalist took his little form from his lover, who expressed a need to relieve himself as well, and sat down on the couch with him in his lap.

“I’m sorry for laughing at you, Andy,” he said, hugging him close. “You were cute as an adult, but now…there’s no words to describe it.”

Andy gave him a look that clearly said he needed to shut up while he was still ahead.

“Okay, okay,” Jinxx chuckled. “You wanna play, or do you wanna nap again?”

The baby in his arms grinned when he said the word “play”, so he apparently didn’t want another nap, even after sixteen ounces of formula.

“Let’s go to the back room so those goofballs don’t accidentally hurt you,” he suggested, rising to his feet. “Guys, we’re going to the back room so Andy can play for a little while.”

“Okay, Jinxx,” CC answered, momentarily taking his attention from the game so he could look at them. “Have fun, little fella.”

“I wanna give him a kiss before you go!” Ash said, bouncing up from where he sat.

Jinxx squatted down so he was at the child’s height, surprised when he didn’t just kiss his forehead, as he’d expected. Instead, he planted his lips firmly on the infant frontman’s as he’d do if they were still adults, but he was far more surprised when the baby responded in kind. The little guy wrapped his tiny hands in the little boy’s shoulder-length hair and pressed his lips as firmly to his as he could.

Ash was the first to pull back, gently cupping his tiny lover’s equally tiny face in his hands as he gazed into those icy-blue eyes. He murmured words of love to him and said that, even if they weren’t their normal selves and things couldn’t go as far as normal, he still loved him all the same. Even though he smiled at the older boy, Andy’s eyes still began to glitter with tears as he tried to express how he was feeling. Being at an age where he was unable to talk had to be hard for him, considering how verbal he could be and that, as a vocalist, his voice was how he expressed himself most often.

Moments later, the pint-sized bassist pulled away with tears in his own eyes and returned to where he’d been playing Black Ops with CC. The eccentric drummer got his attention back on their game, which thankfully kept him from bursting into tears, leaving the multi-instrumentalist to take the baby to the back room to entertain him before he started wailing. He truly felt sorry for them both, considering that no one knew what was going on or how to fix it, as well as that neither of them had asked for this to happen.

“Okay, kiddo. Let’s have some fun, shall we?” he asked, sitting down in the floor.

“I’m gonna take a nap if you don’t need any help with Andy. Okay, sweetheart?”

Looking up, he saw Jake standing in the doorway. “I think I’ve got things under control with this little guy, and CC seems to be entertaining Ash well enough.”

“All right. Come get me if you need me,” he said, squatting down for a moment to kiss him. “Hang in there, Ands. We’ll figure out what happened to you guys and how to fix it.”

The infant frontman reached up to him in a sign that he clearly wanted him to hold him for a moment, and the guitarist found himself unable to refuse. He held him against his chest, his head low enough for him to kiss the top of it as he whispered in his ear that they all still loved him, especially Ash. Andy wrapped his much-shorter arms around his neck in as tight a hug as he could manage while Jinxx pulled out a few toys, trying not to give into his infantile behavior and urges. Once they let each other go, Jake put him back on the floor next to his sweetheart and excused himself to the bunk room for the nap he’d wanted. That left the multi-instrumentalist to entertain the baby, which might be easier said than done since he was still an adult mentally.

* * *

A couple hours later, Jinxx was stretched out on the bed with their infant frontman on his chest as his lover’d been earlier that morning. They were still an hour or so from home, and since he was now worn out and wanting a nap, too, he saw no reason to strap him into the carrier until they were ready to disembark the bus. Jake was still in his bunk asleep, but would undoubtedly rouse himself soon and start packing their things before they got to LA.

“Hey, Jinxx.”

Grunting softly, he cracked his eyes open to see CC standing in the doorway this time. “What is it, Ceece?”

“Ash wore himself out, so I put him in the bunk below the one he normally uses,” the drummer answered. “I just wanted to let you know where he was so you wouldn’t freak out while I get started on packing our stuff.”

“All right, thanks,” Jinxx yawned, one hand under his head while the other was splayed across Andy’s back.

“I’ll leave you alone now and get Jake to help me when he wakes up,” CC told him.

“Thanks, Ceece. You’re a heck of a lot more responsible than most give you credit for,” he chuckled.

“I don’t normally show my serious, responsible side; you know that.” He stuck his tongue out at him. “Life’s no fun if you don’t laugh every now and again, but with these two in their current conditions, we’ve gotta be.”

“That’s true enough.” He yawned again. “If I’m not awake when we get home, you or Jake wake me up when we get there.”

“All right, Jinxx. Enjoy your nap.”

The drummer gently closed the door to the back room behind him, knowing that it was likely to help the m-ulti-instrumentalist fall asleep easier. Jinxx sighed softly as he looked down one more time to make sure the infant using him as a bed was comfortable and still sleeping soundly, smiling when he saw that he was. He gently kissed the top of Andy’s head and wished him sweet dreams, then continued gently caressing his back until his hand stilled its motion as he fell asleep.
* * *
After waking from his own nap, Jake rolled from his bunk, rubbing the sleep from his eyes as he stumbled to the kitchen area for a can of Pepsi. He was surprised to see their hyper drummer already packing their things and wondered where his young charge was. He took a quick gulp of the soda, groaning happily as the fizz burnt a path down his throat, although it wasn’t nearly as bad as whiskey.

“Hey, Ceece,” he called softly, just in case Jinxx and Andy were sleeping.

“Yeah, Jake?” CC answered just as softly.

“Where’s Ash at?” he asked, stopping beside his friend.

“In the bunk under the one he normally uses,” the drummer answered, looking up from his self-assigned task. “He fell asleep while we were playing Black Ops, so I put him there so he’d be comfortable. I didn’t want him accidentally rolling out of his bunk, or getting thrown from it while we were going around a curve or something.”

“Smart thinking, Chuppy,” Jake chuckled. “At least if that happens now, he won’t have very far to fall.”

“That’s what I was thinking. It won’t hurt his little body as bad if that were to happen.” He paused, his brow furrowing and lips puckering in thought. “I wonder what caused this in the first place…”

“I dunno, but I hope we figure it out soon.” He dragged a hand down the length of his face. “Godsmack knows that Jinxx and I don’t mind taking care of Andy for the time being, but we can’t do it forever.”

“Same with me and Ash,” CC agreed, nodding. “I don’t wanna have to literally adopt my partner in crime as my son to keep our little family together.”

“Hopefully it won’t come to that,” the guitarist agreed. “Although you gotta admit, so long as no one finds out the truth, it may not have to.”

“True. Ash and I are colored so similarly that I could say he’s my son and looks more like his mother,” he said, already coming up with a cover story. “On top of that, I could say that his mother died in a tragic car accident, which really isn’t that far from the truth, and that I have custody of him because of that.”

“Jinxx and I can say that he’s always been bisexual and had Andy with a past girlfriend,” Jake agreed. “He got custody of the little fella due to similar unfortunate circumstances, and that I’m his ‘other father’ because of our current relationship.”

“Sounds like we’ve got our cover stories.” He grinned, then frowned again. “But what about our friends’ sudden ‘disappearance’?”

“Hmm… We could say that we think they left the country on a long-overdue couple’s retreat, but haven’t contacted us, so we don’t know for sure,” the guitarist suggested.

“Sounds good, but let’s run it all past Jinxx once he wakes up so we’re all on the same page.”

“Works for me. Let’s finish up here; we’re about half an hour from home.”

Nodding their agreement, the two men checked on those that were still napping before continuing to pack all of their stuff into the suitcases they’d brought, as well as a couple extras they’d bought at Wal-Mart earlier. With the extra clothing that had to be bought for both Andy and Ash, on top of shoes, toys, and anything else from the childrens’ departments, they’d needed the extra storage space.

By the time Jinxx came out of the back room with a sleepy-looking Andy in his arms, they’d managed to complete their self-assigned tasks and now awaited the pint-sized bassist’s awakening. The three men were sitting around the living area, the multi-instrumentalist holding yet another bottle for their infant frontman since he wasn’t awake enough to hold it on his own, going over their cover stories so he knew what Jake and CC’d agreed on. The baby in his arms appeared not to be paying attention to anything they were saying, though he appeared to attempt a thumbs-up when they all agreed, which made them all chuckle.

A soft yawn from the bunk room door alerted them to Ash’s awakening, and they all looked over to see the little boy emerging from the bunk room. He looked even cuter now upon waking up than he did as an adult, and his sleepily rubbing his eyes only added to the cute effect. They sat him down to tell him what their cover stories were, knowing that his adult mind would be able to process the information, so he wouldn’t slip up and accidentally tell someone about what’d happened.

“Sounds like a plan, guys,” the pint-sized bassist agreed. “I can keep my mouth shut and act like a kid should so no one’s the wiser.”

“Good. Let’s hope you don’t make a liar of yourself,” Jake said. “Obviously Andy can’t talk right now, so unless one of us or Jon says something, no one’ll know, anyway.”

“Ake.”

Surprised, they all turned to look at the baby sitting in Jinxx’s lap.

“Did you just try to say my name?” the guitarist asked him.

Unable to really verbalize his thoughts at the moment, Andy grinned and nodded jerkily.

“What else can you say, little fella?” CC asked curiously.

“Uppy!” he cried, pointing to the drummer.

“I think that’s supposed to mean ‘Chuppy’,” the multi-instrumentalist said.

Again, the infant frontman grinned and nodded.

“Inxx!” he cried, turning and looking up at the man who held him. “Ashy!”

“Okay, so he can barely say Ash’s name in a way that doesn’t sound like he’s cussing, and he can’t pronounce J’s and anything starting with the ‘ch-uh’ sound,” Jinxx said thoughtfully.

“What about mom and dad?” Jake asked.

“Ma-ma! Da-da!” Andy cried happily, then appeared to tear up.

“Speaking of…what’re we gonna tell his parents? And Ash’s grandparents, for that matter?” CC asked, sounding worried.

“They’re some of the few that can, and will have to, know the truth,” the multi-instrumentalist answered. “They deserve to know what happened to their boys, even if none of us know exactly why.”

“I guess that’s true enough,” the guitarist and drummer agreed.

“Can we wait till we get home to call my grandparents?” Ash asked. “I don’t wanna lose signal out here, or delay getting home.”

“Yeah, we can,” CC agreed, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. “And just so you know, I won’t make you go live with them until we figure out what happened and how to reverse it unless that’s what all of you want, okay?”

“I’d rather stay with you,” the pint-sized bassist said, pouting.

“Okay, okay. We’ll see what we can work out.”

“Same goes for us and Andy. We won’t force him to go back with his parents, even though he’s a baby, unless that’s what all of them want,” Jake agreed, earning a grin and giggle from the infant.

Having agreed on their game plan, they all relaxed for what little time they had left before the bus arrived at its destination. Once it had, Jinxx kept the baby and child on the bus with him while Jon and CC unloaded their things and got them into their cars. Jake was busy getting the carrier base strapped into the back seat of his sweetheart’s car, knowing that he’d want to keep baby Andy close to him. They also agreed that they’d come back to get his and Ash’s cars one at time while the multi-instrumentalist kept the children at the drummer’s house while they did those things.

After everything’d been loaded into the three mens’ cars, CC got the pint-sized bassist settled in a newly-installed booster seat in the back seat of his while Jinxx got the carrier locked into its base in his. Jake’d already taken off and headed to his and his sweetheart’s apartment, where he’d unload all of their personal belongings before heading over to the drummer’s house.

The multi-instrumentalist followed his last remaining bandmate to his house, keeping an eye an ear out for the baby in his back seat as he drove, although he’d been asleep when he put him back there. It wasn’t long after leaving their tour bus behind that they arrived at CC’s house, where he let Ash out of the back seat. They laughed quietly as the little boy immediately locked himself in the half-bath to take a piss, Jinxx staying nearby with baby Andy and his carrier while the drummer began unloading their stuff.

Gently rocking the carrier sitting in the floor with his foot, he thought about how drastically all of their lives had changed in the past twenty-four hours, and would continue to change. Even though they had every right to do so, he hoped that Andy’s parents and Ash’s grandparents wouldn’t try to take the boys away from them until they could figure out just what’d happened to them the previous night. They seemed to be able to care for them just fine, and on top of that, the boys seemed happiest with them at the moment. And that was if the Biersacks and Purdys even believed their story because, truth though it was, it was far-fetched and highly incredible. He quickly pushed those thoughts from his mind and focused on the baby at his feet.

Notes