Cutting courage*On hold*

Andy~~

"goodbye Andy.... forever" was the last thing she said before she tipped the chair over.... my heart literally stopped, I ran to her fighting with the rope to untie it, as soon as it was off from around her neck I cradled her in my arms crying trying to think why she would do this, her eye's were drifting in and out of consciousnesses "Please don't die" I whispered, I could hear the sirens getting closer and I just held her tight, then I felt her go limp "Sky?? Skylar.... no" I started to cry harder just as the paramedics came in and took Sky onto the stretcher taking her to the ambulance.

As soon as they got to the hospital they rushed her inside, I followed for as long as I could till I got stopped outside of the room she was going into, I stood at the window looking in to what they were doing, that is until a nurse led me out because I wasn't really supposed to be there.

I waited about twenty five more minutes until I was able to see her, when I entered the room my heart dropped to my stomach and tears perked up in my eye's, it killed me to see her like this... she seemed so... strong but I guess she needs some help, I sighed and took a seat next to her on the chair "why.???.... I- I don't understand, Sky what pushed someone as strong as you to this point, who ever hurt you is dead.... you're strong, beautiful and an amazing person, I know you probably can't hear me but... if you can, don't stop fighting, because like I said... no funerals before your 30" I chuckled a bit to myself and grabbed a hold of her hand and held it tight "please... please be okay" I whispered tears flowing down my cheeks.

Skylar~~

it was very bright and it took a while for my eye's to adjust, when the were fully focused all I could see was white with black out lines of things, like trees, houses, but then even those lines were fading "hello?... is anyone hear?" I called out then these beautiful gold doors appeared out of no where, of coerce me being me walked towards them, as I draw nearer the began to open slowly, as soon as they were fully open a figure appeared it was an angel "hush child, you are not meant to be hear but it is your choice... you could either stay internally hear or... you could go back to Andy and the other's where you are loved.. it's up to you" the angel said in a soft voice "but that's the problem... I'm not loved,, no one loves me" I started to cry the angel gave me a sad look "oh child of coerce you are loved... hear look" she waved her hand and cleared the clouds, in the clearing I could see the hospital room I was in and Andy was there holding my hand crying "Andy... I'm sorry" I whispered The angel sighed
"if you stay hear, Andy will get so depressed that he will drop out of the band and will stay in the house for days on end Ashley will drink more then he does now, to the point of alcohol poisoning, CC will never be the happy bubbly person he is right now, and Jake and jinxx will never be the same, you sister will soon find out about how you really died and commit suicide he self, all of this pain and grief will be put on all of the people you love because of one mistake you made, I'll give you three minutes to decide then I'll come back" she said before she walked away... I sat there watching Andy as he cried and I heard every word he said it broke my heart "have you made a decision yet child?" the angel asked I turned my head and gave her a thoughtful smile "yes" she smiled "and where are you going?" I looked back at Andy one lat time "I'm going back" she gave me a thoughtful smile and with in seconds I heard steady beeps and felt a hand squeezing mine.

"I open my lungs dear... I sing this song at funerals, no rush, these lyrics heard a thousand times just plush,a baby boy you've held so tightly, this pain it visits almost nightly, missing hotel beds I feel your touch..

I will await dear a patience of eternity my crush, A universe so still.
No rust, No dust will ever grow on this frame,
One million years, and I will say your name.
I love you more than I can ever scream.

We booked our flight those years ago,
I said I loved you as I left you.
Regrets still haunt my hollow head,
But I promised you that I will see you again, again"

he sung quietly choking every now and then because of tears, just then a pain went through my body and I sat up screaming, Andy's eyes went wide as he brought me in for a hug "Sky shhh its okay I'm hear calm down, you okay shhh" he said softly in to my ear I gripped onto his shirt and cried, he climbed up on to the bed and sat me in his lap

"I sit here and smile dear.
I smile because I think of you and I blush.
These bleeding hollow dials, this fuss.
A fuss is made of miles and travel
Roadways are but stones and gravel.
A bleeding heart can conquer every crutch.

We booked our flight those years ago
You said you loved me as you left me.
Regrets still haunt your saddened head,
But I promised you that I will see you.

We booked our flight those years ago
I said I loved you as I left you
Regret's no longer in my head,
But I promised you and now I'm home again, again, again, I'm home again, again, again.

I'm home again." he finished the song and I was calm enough to talk "Sky are you okay?" he asked hugging me tight "I-I don't know, maybe" I said still in shock, he took me off his lap and turned me around to face him "Skylar look at me, please what's wrong?" he asked I continued to
just stair blankly at nothing "wh-when can we leave?'' I asked still not moving "I'll be right back i'm going to sign you out" he said as he got up and walked out of the door.

After he cam back he helped me gather my things and drove back to my apt, he walked me inside and as soon as I got in there I ran to my room Andy trailing close behind, I jumped on to my bed and curled up into a ball wanting to disappear, my depression has got the best of me and I'm loosing this battle, Andy came in seconds later rushing to the side of my bed looking at me "Sky this isn't healthy pleas talk to me" he pleaded I opened my eye's and looked at him through tears "I-I'm sorry" I mumbled he looked at me confused "for what?" he questioned, I looked at him and sat up so I was eye level to him "f-for being a f-fuck up" I said as I started to cry, I got up and ran to my bathroom and of coerce Andy followed but I closed and locked the door before he could get in "Sky.. Skylar open the door please" he said jiggling the handle, I was searching around for my razor but I couldn't find it, I let out a scream of frustration and then I found it, I picked it up and took it to my wrist, I made fine little cut's but not too deep, just then the door broke open and Andy stood there looking at me in shock, he picked up a clean cloth and wet it then came over to me and started to clean my wrist off, after he was done he stood up and looked me right in the eye's "you are NOT a fuck up, your a beautiful amazing girl and you deserve to be happy" I looked down shaking my head, then he cupped my face and made me look in to his beautiful blue eye's, his face was getting closer and closer, then our lips crashed together, he pulled me closer and pushed me up against my wall, he trailed kisses from my lips to my neck, searching for my sweet spot, once he found it I let out a small moan, he lifted me up and I wrapped my legs around his hips and he led me to my bed lying me down and kissing me again, he liked my bottom lip and I gaped my lips so he could explore my mouth, his hands slowly made there way to the hem of my shirt and in one swift movement he threw it off me trailing kisses down my stomach then back up to my lips, his hand slowly made its way up my side, I then stopped him before he could go any further, he stopped kissing and looked up at me "I-I can't... I-I'm sorry" I said turning my head away, he turned it back "It's okay" he smiled and pecked my lips once more before covering us up with the blankets and pulling me close to him "I love you Sky.. don't ever think I don't" he mumbled into my hair "I love you to Andy, Night" I said with a smile, he hugged me closer "Night beautiful" he yawned.
Is.. He.. Mine?

Notes