Hello, it's me
I was wondering if after all these years you'd like to meet
To go over everything
They say that time's supposed to heal ya
But I ain't done much healing


The rain was making a soft noise against the window pane beneath her finger tips and Luxe could only smile as she looked in to the window before her.

Andy was sitting on what looked to be a plush leather couch, his black leather boots tossed to the side and Luxe could only giggle as she noticed that one of his socks had a hole right in the very toe of it. Andy looked disheveled-exhausted- and Luxe only wished that he would let her so that she could comfort him. She couldn't exactly understand why Andy wasn't answering her phone calls, but it needed to stop.

She had messed up and Luxe knew that Andy was probably really angry with her, but people made mistakes. Luxe had made the worst mistake of all, but that didn't mean she wasn't sorry or regretted her actions.

Sighing, Luxe turned away from the window and looked up in to the cloudy sky. The rain felt good as it washed over her face, almost as if it were washing away every sin that she had ever committed. Soon enough her tears mixed with those rain droplets and Luxe ran her pale hands through her long blonde and dripping wet hair.
If only he would forgive her...

"Hello?" Luxe heard Andy's voice just then and her hear melted as his deep tone seemed to fill her senses. God how she missed his voice.

"Hello? Look whoever this is...I-I really need you to stop calling from this number." His voice had turned sad and Luxe could see a few tears brimming in those baby blues that she loved so much.

Who had called him? It hadn't been her.

Luxe sighed as she turned away from the window completely, her boots squeaking on the wet pavement as she began to walk away.

All she had wanted was to tell Andy how sorry she was and to see if he would forgive her. Luxe could barely forgive herself-even after all this time it seemed impossible for her to heal after all that she had done to mess up the one good thing in her life.
Andy was gone and he wasn't calling her back...


Hello, can you hear me
I'm in California dreaming about who we used to be
When we were younger and free
I've forgotten how it felt before the world fell at our feet

"Andy!" She laughed, her voice squeeling as a pair of lanky arms wrapped around her middle and seemed to pull Luxe towards the ground.

"Luce!" He squealed back at her, mimicking her high pitched tone. The two of them laughed at that, their smiles matching as Andy allowed Luxe to roll over so that she was on her side, facing him instead of laying on top of him.

"Hi..." She said, her long eye lashes fluttering at him as she smiled in that shy way she did when she had nothing to say.

"Hello." He smiled right back at her, his blue eyes reflecting the fading light of the day.
The couple had ventured off for the day-touring was becoming grueling and they had just needed some time together...alone. Andy had pulled Luxe over to a small patch of grass, laughing as he had pulled her down and now there they were-laying face to face and unable to take their eyes off of one another.

"Any reason you wanted me down here with you?" She asked, her smile bright and yet relaxed.

"Nope." Was all he said as Andy reached out a single finger and brushed a piece of her hair away from her exposed cheek. Luxe sighed at the feel of his touch-clearly lost in the moment of the two of them together-peaceful at last.

"Well then maybe I should go..." She teased, starting to get up and then giggling as Andy reached out and held her in to place. His touch was firm, but still gentle and showed his true intention-to keep her here with him so that they could just be.

"Stay..." He said softly and Luxe only smirked as she resettled herself and locked her eyes on his once again.

"So the only reason for pulling me down here was so that you could say hi to me..." She said and Andy could only smile, getting lost in everything that was this girl laying beside him.

"Pretty much." He said simply and the two of them burst out in to a fit of laughter. They were truly free in that moment...with not a worry in the world between them.


There's such a difference between us
And a million miles


A handprint was left on the foggy glass of his living room window and Andy felt a chill run up his spine.

Was someone watching him?

Where had that come from?

Andy sighed, running a thumb under each eye to try and wipe away any evidence of his tears.

The thoughts of what and who had lost last year were still haunting him and the phone calls weren't helping. At first one had come in the middle of the night while Andy had been sleeping and he didn't even notice until he checked his phone the following morning. That number had been shut off-he had made sure of that himself.

But his phone kept ringing.

When Andy would pick up it was nothing but static and yet there was still this feeling he couldn't shake.

There were other things that seemed strange-a constant feeling of being watched, footsteps in the night when he and Crow were in bed and then there was that ever present sadness that seemed to follow Andy around whenever he was home.

The thing was-it didn't feel like home anymore to Andy.

He had removed all of his personal photos because most of them contained the one person who had broken Andy's heart.

Lucinda


"This is getting fucking weird..." He muttered to himself and Andy's eyes grew wide as another hand print seemed to appear on the window out of nowhere. It was pouring rain out-a rare event for LA-and whoever was out there was fucking crazy.

Andy rushed to the window and placing both hands on the sill he threw the window up, almost hard enough to break the glass. He stuck his head out, his gelled and slicked back hair melting and falling in to his sad blue eyes. There was no one out there, but he sent out a warning just incase.

"Whoever is out here and watching me...go away. Just...just go away..."


Hello from the other side
I must have called a thousand times
To tell you I'm sorry for everything that I've done
But when I call you never seem to be home
Hello from the outside
At least I can say that I've tried
To tell you I'm sorry for breaking your heart
But it don't matter. It clearly doesn't tear you apart anymore


Luxe jumped as the window infront of her slammed open and she was face to face with the one person who she needed to see the most.

Andy

His blue eyes were furious, but there was an incredible sadness behind them as well. His nose was mere inches away from her own and she felt the rain droplets fly off of his hair as he looked left and then right. Could he not see her? Did he not know she was standing right in front of him?

Or did he just not care?

Andy's eyes lost their fury as he looked around and then faced her full on. Was he finally noticing her? Was his anger at her finally dying down?


"Whoever is out here and watching me...go away. Just...just go away..."

His tone was so angry at first, but then is ended on such a sad note that Luxe felt her heart break in to a million pieces. It was over...he was done with her and never wanted to see her again.

"I'm so sorry Andy...so very, very sorry..." She said, closing her eyes as her hand went out and rested lightly against his cheek.


Andy shivered out of her touch, growling something about people playing pranks and then he was gone behind a closed and locked window. Luxe howled, her hands reaching to the sky in a silent plea for someone to end her pain and sadness...

She just wanted all of this to end and for Andy to forgive her.

For everything she had ever done to him.


Hello, how are you?
It's so typical of me to talk about myself. I'm sorry
I hope that you're well
Did you ever make it out of that town where nothing ever happened?


"What are you trying to tell me dude?" CC asked as he sat across from his broken bandmate. Luxe had been gone for a month and Andy had all but disappeared. Finally CC had tracked him down at his condo and basically broke the door down to get in.

What he found made the drummer cringe-his bandmate was in no state to take care of himself and honestly it didn't seem like Andy wanted to take care of himself. He was pale, thinner than usual and was only surviving on alcohol and crackers. This wasn't good...Andy was slowly killing himself.

"I feel like Lucinda is still here...like she's still around man..." Andy said as he pulled the blanket CC had wrapped around his shoulders closer together.

"I-uh-...wow." Was all CC could manage before shutting his mouth. Andy was obviously going through some things, but this was a lot to handle.

"I'm not crazy." Andy said sternly.

"I never said you were man." CC defended, putting his hands palms out towards his friend.

"Lucinda still lives on in that diner man...she's still around." Andy rambled on and CC's heart broke for a his bandmate. Andy had stumbled upon a diner that had been a mini shrine to Luxe and the other girls and he couldn't seem to stop talking about it.

"Yes, but she is gone Andy..." CC pushed and then jumped as Andy slammed a hand against the table.

"She's haunting me man..." He exclaimed and CC closed his eyes. Losing a love like Luxe was not something that CC had ever experienced and there was only so much he could say.

"I know Andy...I know..." CC said as he reached across the table and placed his hand on top of Andy's.

They stayed silent for a while until finally it seemed like Andy was ready to get up.

CC would stay with his friend for two weeks, helping the singer to cope and to help him face facts.

Lucinda was dead and was not coming back...no matter how haunted Andy felt by her.



And it's no secret that the both of us
Are running out of time


Luxe felt the hot tears pricking her eyes like a thousand tiny needles as she watched Andy walk away from her.

What had she said? What had she done?

Luxe was never really sure anymore, but it killed her every time she and Andy got in to it.
They had come back together-both as friends and as something more-and now they were going out on tour together to support BVB's fifth album and the Doll's third. But if the couple couldn't even agree on a place to get dinner, then how were they going to agree on anything tour related?

Luxe sighed loudly as she collapsed against the cushions on her couch and placed her head in her hands. Andy was slamming doors somewhere upstairs and Luxe held her breath and closed her eyes and just waited. His temper was getting worse and worse, meanwhile Luxe's headaches were becoming a daily occurrence and it seemed like there was no getting away from them. Suddenly Luxe felt someone standing in front of her and she nearly jumped as a hand landed on her right shoulder.


"You doing okay babe?" Andy's voice, husky and deep with anger, rang in her ears and Luxe only sniffed away her tears before looking up at the man standing in front of her. His blue eyes were troubled and there was no trace of his usual lop sided smirk.

"Not really..." She said, sniffing again but it was no use. Her tears would fall and soon enough Luxe was trying to hold them back with the tips of her fingers.

"I-I...I don't know why I blew up like that..." Andy admitted and Luxe smiled softly as his cheeks grew slightly pink.

"Maybe we just need some time..." She suggested and Andy huffed before he got down on his knees so that he was eye to eye with the only girl he would ever love so deeply.

"I think we're about out of time...I think it's time we just stop worrying about every little thing and start truly living and loving one another." He smiled, the corners of his blue eyes crinkling and it was absolutely infectious.

"You know you drive me crazy..."

"You wouldn't have it any other way." He remarked.

And Luxe knew deep down that Andy was right.



So hello from the other side
I must have called a thousand times
To tell you I'm sorry for everything that I've done
But when I call you never seem to be home
Hello from the outside
At least I can say that I've tried
To tell you I'm sorry for breaking your heart
But it don't matter. It clearly doesn't tear you apart anymore


Andy sniffed loudly as he crossed one arm over his chest and held it in place with his free hand. The sun was beating down on him from the sky, but even still he could tell that the light was fading. The breeze was a cool one, the leaves on the trees wafting softly and as a piece of his black hair fell in to his face, Andy just let it stay there.

He didn't want to move...he was too scared to.

It was that time of the year again when Andy made his way East to visit Lucinda at her final resting place. It only seemed like yesterday that he had buried her and yet when Andy really thought about it so much time had passed and yet he had barely healed. Andy just constantly felt as if he was being haunted-but Lucinda and the love that they had shared.

Everywhere he turned she was there.

Her scent.

Her things.

The times they had spent together.

Andy closed his eyes, raising his face to the wind and silently wishing that Lucinda would leave him to be in peace...as she was.


"Luce...I love you. I will always love you, but you're gone and I can't...I can't do this anymore. Your ghost is haunting me and the mere thought of you is slowly driving me insane. I won't ever forget you because that would simply be impossible, but I can't hold on to you anymore. I know you're at peace, but I'm not and I can't live this life anymore. I hope you can understand, wherever you are, that this doesn't mean that what we had wasn't special...it's just not something I can hold on to anymore. I love you Lucinda...forever."


He kept his eyes closed, but Andy opened them suddenly as a shiver ran down his spine.
A cool breeze grazed over his cheek and it was in that moment that Andy knew that he could finally and truly move on.



Hello from the other side
I must have called a thousand times
To tell you I'm sorry for everything that I've done
But when I call you never seem to be home
Hello from the outside
At least I can say that I've tried
To tell you I'm sorry for breaking your heart
But it don't matter. It clearly doesn't tear you apart anymore


Lucinda watched as Andy stood before a grey headstone and her head seemed fuzzy as she tried to look past him and see who he had come to visit. She didn't remember anyone dying, but then again when someone cuts you out of their life completely it's hard to keep up with what's going on in their life. Who had Andy lost that had crushed him so?
Luxe moved closer and her heart nearly stopped beating in her chest as she finally caught the words etched on to the stone.

Lucinda Lynne Abernathy.

This...this was her grave and suddenly Luxe felt like she couldn't breathe.
What had happened? What had she done? Luxe felt the pain shoot through her body as her knees met the ground and she collapsed completely. It all seemed to make sense to her now-Andy hadn't been ignoring her or her calls...he had lost her a long time ago. As she knelt there, Luxe felt a clarity take her over and finally it all seemed to be coming back to her.
A fight. Her rage. The blinding headache that had completely taken her by surprise. And then nothing.


"Luce...I love you. I will always love you, but you're gone and I can't...I can't do this anymore. Your ghost is haunting me and the mere thought of you is slowly driving me insane. I won't ever forget you because that would simply be impossible, but I can't hold on to you anymore. I know you're at peace, but I'm not and I can't live this life anymore. I hope you can understand, wherever you are, that this doesn't mean that what we had wasn't special...it's just not something I can hold on to anymore. I love you Lucinda...forever."


She felt terrible as Lucinda watched Andy look towards the sky and ask her to please let him rest. She hadn't meant to haunt him, but it was just so hard to let someone like Andy go. Lucinda smiled as she got to her feet and slowly walked towards the one man who had always loved her.

Andy sighed softly and Lucinda, with a smile on her lips, pressed a kiss to his cheek in a final goodbye.

Andy's eyes opened and it was like they were sharing in their final goodbye and while sad...it was also the best thing that could ever happen. Goodbyes are always sad, but sometimes they have to happen.

No matter how much they hurt...

Notes