I saw a star beneath the stairs glowing through the melting walls.
Who will be the first to begin their fall?
Or will we become one?


“You okay Lily? You’ve been kind of jumpy ever since we got home.” Andy said and Lily only smiled over at him, her eyes falling down to his lap. Her legs were stretched out across his and he still insisted on running his fingers up and down her legs, making her shiver slightly. No wonder she was jumpy.

“I’m fine. After this do you want to go to bed?” She asked, yawning to prove her point of the fact that it was late and they both had work in the late morning the next day.

“Yeah, it’s almost over. Can we watch the last one tomorrow night? Please?” He sounded five in that moment and Lily couldn’t help but smile. Her heart fluttered as he trained those baby blues on her and Lily felt something fall in to her stomach.


Shit. Love. She loved Andy. She had known this was coming-she had probably loved him since their first day on Earth. Or maybe it was when he saved her in the alley? Fuck-it didn’t matter. She loved him. Heart stopping, gut wrenching, giggle inducing love. She loved the way he talked. She loved his smile. His hair. His lips. His eyes. She loved how he knew nothing of the world and yet seemed to get so excited when he learned about new things. This wasn’t just puppy love-no. This was full blown, I want to spend the rest of my life with you and grow old together love.

Would Andy ever grow old? He was half Demon, so would he ever get past the age of eighteen? As Lily sat there, biting down on her lower lip, her attention was on anything but the movie. How could she love someone who would never love her back? How could she love someone who had no clue what it was to love anything-let alone a fucked up person like her? She felt like crying in that moment. She wanted to fall apart.

How were they supposed to be together when Andy wasn't even human? How could he love her when she barely felt like one herself? Lily bit down on her lower lip, bit it so hard that she could taste blood in her mouth and she knew that this was only going to get more complicated. Lily wanted to cry, she wanted to let the tears just roll down her cheeks, but she knew that it would only alarm Andy. He was still so unaware of how humans worked and he didn't seem to like it when she got emotional. Silently Lily just sat there, but her mind was somewhere else...

It was upstairs, hidden in the bathroom.



Am I the star beneath the stairs?
Am I a ghost upon the stage?
Am I your anything?


Lily let the tears fall from her eyes-well if she had the ability to cry then there would be tears, but the thought was there. She had died, was in Heaven and now was watching as Andy seduced a pretty girl at the bar of the club they had just played in. Lily had been gone less than six months and here was Andy-replacing her with some tramp. She was trying not to let it get to her, but her blonde hair fell into her face and her lavender eyes gave her away. Lily had never wanted to die, but she had been meant to and it was obvious that Angels always got their way. Silently someone was walking up behind her and Lily nearly jumped over the balcony as someone reached out and touched her.


"You okay there doll?" It was Michael-the only one up here who understood how Lily felt. The young girl turned, her wings fluttering in the soft breeze as she faced her one true friend and only confidant.

"Not really. Is it that obvious?" She said, her tone cynical and Michael only smiled at her as he looked over the balcony. The boy was sneaking around with another girl-typical of a human and half Demon.

"Oh yeah. Why do you let him get to you Lily? You knew he was going to move on eventually..." Michael was right-dammit. Slowly the Angel turned back around, more empty tears coming to her eyes as she watched Andy kiss that girl the way he used to kiss her.

"I-I know. I just hoped that I wouldn't care as much as I do." Lily said and Michael only moved towards the small girl, bringing her head to rest against his chest. Michael knew that Lily still loved Andy-she probably always would.

"You still love him." He said-not a question, just a statement. Lily sobbed against his chest, dry sobs that made her throat hurt.

"I do! I really, really do and look-I'm just a ghost to him..." She was really sobbing now and other's were beginning to stare. Michael just held her tightly and he just let her cry.

"No...No I know that's not true." Michael said and Lily only shook her head as she pulled away from him and looked back down at Andy. The couple were fully going at it now and she felt sick as something clicked in the back of her brain.

"I never meant anything to him...I'm nothing to him now..."


It hurt, but she knew that that was what Lily needed to keep telling herself to survive.



I saw a star beneath the stairs
Glowing bright before descent
And in the morning there is nothing left
But what's inside of me.


“Well-um- you know you love someone when they are all you think about. It hurts to not be near them and you feel lost when they aren’t around. Uh-you always smile when you think about them and you can’t bear to think about what you’re life would be like without them in it…even for a few shorts hours.” She explained in a rushed voice and as she looked at him Lily noticed that Andy seemed to be thinking things over. He was biting down on his lip ring and his blue eyes had clouded over with thought. Lily licked her lips slowly as she watched him think things through and suddenly he smiled at her.

“Does your heart race when they’re around?” He asked and Lily said nothing as she could only nod her head slowly. She looked at him and then looked down nervously as she tucked her white blonde hair behind her ears and she could feel her hands trembling.

“And do your palms get really sweaty every time you look into their beautiful eyes?”He asked his voice low and Lily felt herself shiver as she looked up from her lap and caught his eyes. Beautiful eyes? What was he getting at?

“Kissing them-does it feel like an electric shock is running through your body when your lips touch?” Lily gulped loudly and she only nodded as Andy smirked at her and moved his face closer towards her.

“Do you get lost in their eyes every time you look at them?” His voice was low and raspy as he looked at her through his eye lashes and Lily felt a blush creep up her neck.

“Ye-yes.” She said and suddenly he had closed the space between them and Lily felt herself melt inside.


Their lips touched and as his lip ring rubbed against the skin of her mouth Lily knew exactly what Andy had meant about electricity. It felt as if someone had come up to her and held a cattle prod to her stomach-she felt electric and she felt alive…more alive than she ever had. Andy smirked into their kiss and soon his hand dropped hers and instead they found a home at the back of her head, his fingers tangling themselves in her hair as he kissed her even deeper than before. His tongue was on her lips and Lily moaned as she parted them for him and then his tongue was in her mouth.

They stayed like that for a few more moments until finally Andy pulled away. He seemed out of breath as he looked at her through his long lashes. She looked at him, her lavender eyes haunting him as he felt a blush come on and he cleared his throat to break the silence.



Am I the star beneath the stairs?
Am I a ghost upon the stage?
Am I your anything?


"Come on Lily! You can do better than that!" Gabriel called out to her as he tossed another energy ball her way and Lily was barely able to duck out of the way. She had been training for over a hundred years-Angel time. On Earth is had been about four months.

"I'm trying!" She called out as she rolled to the floor, her long blonde hair getting caught underneath her wings. Swiftly she tried to untangle herself, but Gabriel was quicker. He had her up and pushed against the wall so quick she didn't even have time to blink.

"No. No you are not. You are far too concerned about that stupid and worthless human. You are a warrior Lily!" Gabriel was in her face now, his lavender eyes on fire and Lily shrank away from him. Why had she gotten the one Angel who hated her as a trainer?

"I-I love him. It's my duty as his Guardian to watch over him." She said, her tone guarded and Gabriel only laughed before pushing her up against the wall tightly. Lily knew she sounded like a lovesick girl, but it was the truth-Andy had been assigned to her.

"You are nothing to him." Gabriel spat-he knew just where to hit her where it would hurt.

"I-he loved me..." She stopped as Gabriel let her go and just shook his head.

"Once. He loved you once...now you are nothing but a ghost in his life." Gabriel was looking at her, his eyes cold and unfeeling.


Lily wanted to crumble-he was right. She had watched Andy, day in and day out and every time she looked down on him he was with another girl. What was she to him? A sad memory of a love lost too soon? Had she really ever been anything to him besides a way out of Hell? She pulled her shoulders forward, put a scowl on her face and ran at Gabriel. As the two of them battled it out, Lily felt her love and affection for Andy finally begin to disappear. If she was nothing to him, then he was nothing to her and as Lily finally got Gabriel on his back, she looked the Angel right in the face.


"You're right. I am nothing to him, now if only my heart would understand what my head is trying to tell it." She said and Gabriel only smirked at her as he took and began to rub his palms together.


He could fix her little love problem...it was just going to hurt a lot.



And I don't want to die tonight;
Will you believe in me?
And I don't want to fall into the light.


She was dying-she knew she was dying and Lily quickly came to accept that fact. Andy held her, his strong arms covered in her blood as he brought her so that she was sitting up with her back against his chest and he kissed every inch of her face, her neck and her head. She felt cold and Lily shivered as Andy’s fingers ran over her skin. He held her tightly, weeping into her hair as he rocked the both of them back and forth. Lily looked up, her vision blurring as she noticed that anyone who could stand were now forming a circle around the two of them.

Lily tried to clear her throat, but as she coughed she noticed that blood was pouring from her mouth and she knew that her time was fading fast. She reached out a hand, grabbing for his and Andy only sobbed harder as he noticed how utterly cold and lifeless her skin felt when it touched his own.


“An-Andy…” Her voice was weak and Andy almost didn’t hear her over his own sobbing, but he kissed the side of her face and leaned in until his cheek was against her own.

“Lily…pl-please d-don’t g-go…” He sobbed harder, his tears falling against her cheeks and for one brief moment Lily felt the warmth grace her skin. She only smiled at him weakly and she sighed as she felt his fingers rubbing against her skin gently.

“I-I don’t have a choice Andy… I can hear someone calling to me.” She said, her voice fading and Andy did the only thing he thought would help-he rested his lips against hers and shivered as he felt her cold skin against his own.

“Ignore them! Please stay with me Lily…I don’t know what I’m going to do without you. Who’s going to teach me things? Who’s going to love me…no can love me like you can.” He sobbed as his forehead rested against hers softly and Lily only smiled at him.

“I will always love you Andy and I am so proud of everything that you have become. But this isn’t the place for me now…I don’t belong here.” She said and as he looked down at her, as Andy looked into those lavender eyes…he knew that she was leaving him.

“But I don’t know if I can continue on without you…I love you so much Lily…” Andy cried as he rested his lips against hers once again and he pulled away as he looked down at the girl in his arms.


As he had kissed her, Andy felt Lily take her last breath and now she was laying there, her lavender eyes staring up at him blankly. His eyes grew misty once again as Andy took her cold hand and held it to his cheek. She felt lifeless and cold and Andy sobbed as he pulled her closer, her blonde hair sticky with her own blood as it had fallen out of the ponytail and was laying over his lap in a light blonde sheet. He cradled her in his arms, rocking back and forth as people all around them remained silent.



Will you wish upon?
Will you walk upon me?
I don't want to die tonight.


“Tell me everything that happened Lily, from start to finish. I-I need to know why you stopped being able to love me…” He sounded so sad and Lily knew that her tale was only going to break his heart further. She sighed, turning away from him slightly as she faced one of the blank walls and held up her hand.

“I’ll tell you, but I also kind of need to show you.” She said softly and Andy’s eyes grew wide as the blank wall before them was filled with a scene that he had hoped he would never have to see again. Lily was laying in his arms, her blood spilling out of her chest and on to the floor and on to him. Andy felt his heart stop as the scene changed.

“I died, in your arms and I never got to thank you for being there for me when that happened. But after I died, I floated up for what turned out to be a week in human years. As soon as I reached the top, I was led in to a room by a faceless being. There I was left by myself for over ten Heavenly years.” Lily explained and Andy watched as the Lily on the wall paced, cried, collapsed in to a heap and screamed out for someone to please help her. It broke his heart, but at the same time he couldn’t help but feel slightly angry.

“After that finally someone came to get me and that someone turned out to be Michael-who is known as the Kindness of God. He held me as I cried and told me what had happened-that I had died and was now in Heaven. He also told me of God’s plan, not only for myself, but for you and the others aswell.” Andy looked at the screen and tears came to his eyes as another Angel, one with brown hair and kind eyes, bent down and helped Lily to her feet. He told her about her destiny and he hugged her as she cried before leading the small girl from the all white room.

“He knew I needed to see you-that I would find comfort in seeing you live your life. So he helped me to the Viewing Chamber and explained to me that as Angels, we were allowed to watch over the ones we loved. As soon as I looked over that balcony and watched you mourning me-I crumbled all over again. I watched you and Uriel at the cemetery, I watched you enter the recording studio and I watched as you cried out for me in your sleep at night.” Andy blushed-he never knew that Lily had been watching him for so long, but that thought gave him some comfort.

“A hundred years passed by and I never left that chamber. I-I couldn’t bear to not see you every day. Finally another Angel-Gabriel-came to me and told me that there was more in store for me than just being a Guardian. That’s when the training started…” Lily sounded angry now and Andy could see why. A very large Angel with a stern look on his beautiful face, had approached Lily and led her away from the chamber. Then quick bits of training flew on to the screen and Andy watched in awe.


Lily seemed to struggle at first-her spirit had been crushed with her death and it was obvious that she wanted to give in, but Gabriel wouldn’t let her. Andy found himself growing angry as he watched the taller Angel fight with Lily, pushing her down, dragging her back up, only to push her down once again. She would cry, begging to be taken back to the Viewing Chamber, but he would only laugh and tell her to get back to work. Andy looked to Lily then and he noticed that she had her hands clenched tightly in her lap.



Am I the star beneath the stairs?
Am I a ghost upon the stage?
Am I your anything?


“Ar-are you serious right now?” Andy asked as he placed his hands on her sides and Lily only smiled at him. Her hair was hanging in front of her like a sheet and Andy held back as he desperately wanted to reach out and sweep her light blonde tresses out of the way.

“Why not?” Lily asked as she moved her hips slightly and Andy had to hold in his groan. She was teasing him-she had to be.

“Well I mean you’ve been scaring the shit out of me the past few months-telling me if we ever give in to that passion that I’ve got a one way ticket to Hell and your wings are going to be ripped out of their sockets. For one…” He laughed and Lily only smiled down at him as she leaned down and pressed her lips against his.

“I don’t care about any of that right now…I only care about you.” She whispered, her lips still against his as she smiled and bit down on his lip ring. Andy groaned and with as much strength as he could muster, he pushed Lily away.

“Yeah, but I care too and I don’t want to get you in trouble.” Andy said and Lily only looked down at him, sighing heavily as she sat up a little bit more. Her shirt had ridden up her stomach and Andy wanted to reach out and run his fingers right across where the waist band of her jeans met her skin.

“It’s just one night Andy-just tonight I want us to be together…lets be human together.” Lily’s eyes were filled with a childlike glee that he hadn’t seen since she was human and he found it infectious.

“Just tonight? That’s all I’m good for?” He asked, half kidding but he couldn’t help but feel slightly hurt. Was she just using him? Was this just some game to Lily at this point?

“It has to be only for tonight…I want more, but I don’t think there can ever be anything more for us. Can we just have tonight…please?” Lily asked, her bottom lip sticking out and Andy only smiled softly as he looked up at her.


She looked so perfect sitting on top of him-almost like she had never left. Andy had missed this-he had missed her and Lily knew it. She had watched him, she had heard him cry out for her at night and he knew she had seen him wake in the mornings-tears running down his cheeks as he looked around for her. She had come back to him, hatred filling her heart but not because she wanted to feel that way and Andy knew that it was only a matter of time before she came back to him entirely.

Now here they were, in her bunk with the curtain closed and everyone else on the bus was fast asleep-no one would know. It would only be for this one night, which made Andy sad to think about, but one night with Lily was worth the pain…it was worth everything.


“I love you.” He said before Andy reached for Lily’s face and brought her lips crashing down to his.

Am I the star beneath the stairs?
Am I a ghost upon the stage?
Am I your anything?


As the storm cleared and Lily looked around, she noticed that Andy was laying on the floor only a few feet away from her. His breathing was raged and Lily could see that there was only a slight flap of skin holding him together-he had been slashed across his ribs by a sword that would actually cause him real damage. Lily cried out, her hands covering her face as she scrambled over towards the Demon and found that he was losing his battle. Blood was bubbling out of the corners of his perfect mouth and his blue eyes were losing their playful shine that they always had. Lily quickly took him in to her arms gently and held Andy as he reached out a hand and placed it against her cheek.


“I-I never meant any of it Lily…none of it. I love you…I will always love you.” Andy said, coughing and Lily cringed as blood dribbled down his chin. She grasped his hand and as she looked down in to those eyes, Lily knew there were only two things for her to do in this situation.

“Hey...Andy look at me. It’s okay…I forgive you. I see now what you were doing and it’s okay…” Lily said and as Andy smiled up at her, she could tell they were running out of time. Suddenly the door burst open and people began to flood around them. Michael-battle worn and tired looking-came to her side and Lily cried out as he put a strong arm around her shoulders.

She knew what she had to do…

“Andy, Andy listen to me. I can help you-I can heal you and make you whole again, but there’s a catch.” Lily said and Andy’s eyes grew wide as he looked up at her. Lily sighed, her tears falling down her cheeks as she locked eyes with him.

“If I heal you…you will become human. That means you would lose all of your memories of me and this war. You’ll just be Andy Biersack of Black Veil Brides…no longer a Demon fighting his way through life.” Lily said and Andy grumbled, clearing his throat so that he could speak.

“No-take me to Heaven…I want to be with you…I have to be.” He spoke and his voice was so low and muddled that only Lily could hear him. She cried then-this was so hard. Selfishness wanted to win out and the thought of eternity with Andy made her heart grow light.

She knew now what she had to do.

“I-I can’t do that Andy…you have so much left in you. You have an Army that needs you…friends that need you…you aren’t done setting the world on fire Andy. You have to stay here.” Lily said sadly and she felt her tears falling down her cheeks and could see that they were landing on Andy’s face and neck. He only smiled at her, pressing a hand to her cheek and he felt ice cold.

“I love you Lily…” He said softly, his eyes closing and Lily knew it was now or never.

“I love you too Andy…always.”

In that moment Andy meant everything to her...he always had and he always would.

Notes