Never Give In, Never Back Down

*Is she going to wake up? Wait, you told her what? B-b-but....ugh fine...i'll get it* I cracked my eyes open, looking around. Where
the hell am I? I know I heard voices before i woke up. I pulled myself up into a sitting position and pulled my knees up to my chin.

"Oh hey Ash, you're awake." I looked up into Ashley's face slightly surprised, then it dawned on me this must be his house. I took
another look around at the sparce furniture and memorabilia that i would have expected. As my eyes scanned the room the stopped on
his signature bass. He chuckled as I got up, without saying a word, and walked over to the bass. I allowed my fingers to dance across it
before smoothing it over the surface.

Turning back to face him I managed to mumble "you got a bathroom round here?" His low chuckle rumbled out in the room as
he turned on his heel leading me down a narrow hallway.

"There ya go." He said motioning to the door in front of me. Thanking him I turned the knob. Once inside I locked the door
pressing my ear to the door. I could hear Ash's footsteps growing softer and decided it was safe now. I looked around the small bathroom,
wondering if I should attempt this, here. Bending over the toilet I made myself sick, listening closely incase his footsteps came back my
way. Slowly i rose to my feet, flushing, and walking over to the tiny medicine cabinet that hung above the sink. Opening it I found what
appeared to be Ashley's scarcely used razor. Popping out one of the blades I drug it across my pale skin watching as the crimson blood
bubbled to the surface.

When I got back to the room I woke up in Ashley was sitting on the couch with the entirety of Black Veil Brides. They were deep in
discussion as I slid into the room, taking a seat in the corner. Ashley was talking.

"Ok, you guys, so there's this girl." Everyone sighed.

"Dude, really not again." CC remarked.

"Nah, this one's different, she's really into the band, I told her I'd give her an autograph, but she asked if I could let her meet
everyone, she's not one of those creepy fans, she's actually really chill." I smiled softly chuckling at the sloppy grin on his face. Jake and CC
turned and looked in my direction realizing I'd walked in.

"Come're Ash." Ashley motioned for me to join him in front of everybody. I stood up, finding my balance, before walking over to
him. I looked at everyone, first looking skeptical at my appearance, in all BVB merch before turning and staring at Andy. "This is Ashley
you guys, she goes by Ash though." Turning to me he pointed everybody out in turn muttering their names, "...but i guess you already knew
that huh?" Nodding my head I let him drape his arm around my shoulders.

"Ashley, can i smoke in here?" He nodded as I pulled out my cigarettes and lit one.

"Ash right?" Andy asked.

"yeah."

"Can i get one of those?" Pointing to my cigarettes i pulled one out, Jake muttering something about the damn cancer sticks. I
lit mine and passed the lighter to Andy who lit his. After he'd tossed the lighter back I took a seat on the coffee table. Taking a deep breath
I looked around at the guys sitting on the couch expectantly.

"So, Ashley already told you I wanted to meet you guys. Honestly, you guys saved me. I wanted to know what you guys went
through to come up with the lyrics, get to know your personalities, and in return i'll tell you about me and tell you how stupid your girl
fans are. well, most of them anyway."

Chuckling Ashley asked "Direct isnt she?"
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Hours later we were still talking, laughing about the stupidity of some of their fans. Watching the sun go down and drinking a
beer with the guys was wonderful. "Shit!!" I screeched jumping to my feet.

"What is it Ash?" Jinxx looked over the rim of his third beer.

I turned to Ashley. "I have to get to work." His eyes flickered with recognition. He knew I didn't want my job known. Turning on
his heels he grabbed the keys and led me out of the house.

"I'll be right back guys." I waved and then got in the passenger seat.

"here." Ashley tossed a ripped up sheet of paper onto my lap. Looking down I saw four numbers scrawled across it. I looked up at
him. He must have seen the confusion plastered across my face. "The guys think you're really cool. So, um, you want me to pick you up
after work? Go have some coffee or something, I can take you back to your place." However, his expression was stone. I knew he probably
wanted to pick me up because he thought I was helpless. That wasn't it, I didn't fight back because I deserved it.

"yeah, you can pick me up. I should be out around 11:45, if not you can text me. I go to UCLA but...I don't have a room, the girl
I was supposed to room with kicked me out."

He looked pensive as he pulled into the club parking lot. "You can stay at my place." My eyes lit up and I lunged over the steering
column, wrapping my arms around his neck. Kissing his cheek I got out of the car and rushed over to G. As he pulled away I mouthed a
'thanks' to him.

"So G, you will NEVER guess who i'm living with, starting tonight." She looked over wide-eyed.

"Who?"

"Ashley motherfucking Purdy, that's who!" She grabbed my hand dragging me inside begging me to tell her all about it.
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'Ashley, get ur ass outside! been waiting 45min ~PurdyPornBVB' I smiled before texting him that I'd be out in a second.

'What's taking you so long? ~PurdyPornBVB'

'Getting my stuff ~BVB babe' Sliding my phone in my pocket I snuck into the alley. Torn BVB shirt falling over one shoulder my
ripped skinnies and handcuff belt tight around my waist. I had on extra makeup tonight because it was a strobe light show tonight. So
I looked like a member of BVB rushing out of the place.

When i walked around the corner my bag on my back I saw Ashley leaning against his car, once cowboy boot perched on top of
the other. The second he looked up four guys pounced from the shadows, suprising Ashley. They began fighting and Ashley yelled for me to
stay away. I didn't listen, dropping my bag I strode over to the fighting men and calmly started batting my lashes at the bigger one.

"Hey pretty boy, come here, I can give you a better high than beating up my friend here." Looking through my lashes I saw him
blush and I saw Ashley's shocked features. I grabbed his hand pulling him into the alley kissing down his neck. Once out of sight I pulled
him closer, pressing my fingers into the pressure point at his neck until he dropped to the ground. "One down, three to go." Walking back
around the building I saw Ashley had knocked one out, good one less for me to take care of.

"Sweetie, could you come and help me? Your friend seems to have run off leaving me dissatisfied." His eyes widened as I led him
toward the spot where his friend lay passed out. As we rounded the corner I allowed him to see his friend. Rushing over to him, he tried to
check his pulse. He didn't even see me as I roundhouse kicked him in the back of the head, making him pass out and probably giving him
concussion.

On my way back I saw Ashley still struggling with the other guy. Ashley was facing me and he saw me coming but he didn't let
the perp know I was there, thank god for common sense. I walked up behind him, landing a blow on his jugular making him cry out in
pain before finally collapsing to the ground, unconscious.

"Come on, lets get out of here before they wake up." Ashley looked at me skeptically before opening the door for me. We hauled
ass back to his place and not five minutes later heard sirens wailing as they passed by the house.

"So want to let me in on what that was?" Ashley asked slight anger in his voice.

"I...um...had to learn how to fight." I mumbled before asking if I could use his shower.

"Sure, you got a wash rag and towel or?" He left the end of his sentence off as I pulled out a fluffly black towel and wash rag.

"The shower is in the master bathroom, last door at the end of the hall, and i'm sure you can find the bathroom from there." My smile
faltered and I heard him ask me what was wrong.

"Um....where am I going to sleep, and uh...could I um....possibly use one of your shirts? I usually sleep naked."

He eyed me questioningly before telling me to follow him. Once in his room he grabbed a motley crue long sleeved t-shirt and tossed it to me. He
let me into the bathroom and shut the door as he walked out. One wall was entirely made up of a mirror. I stood watching myself as I
pulled off my shirt and jeans, poking my ribs and looking down at my hips, that i'd recently gotten pierced. Looking down I saw my body
somewhat thin, sickly pale, and scarred from years of abuse and cutting. Raising my eyes to the mirror I saw the dead look in my eyes
that normally accompanied my appearance in front of a reflective surface. Placing my thin fingers against the mirror all i could see was
myself at 280lbs, struggling with myself, and abused by others. Shaking I rushed over to the toilet and vomited before slowly rising and
washing my hands. I walked over to the shower turning on the water and pulling off my bra.
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"well this is it." I said showing Ash to the bathroom. I pulled the door closed behind me, climbing into my bed to wait for her. I
wondered what she'd want to do tonight. Maybe hang with the guys or watch a movie. Closing my eyes I began drifting off to sleep until I
heard the sound that used to haunt my dreams. The sound of vomiting, I wondered if I was dreaming about the days when Andy used to
puke because I had someone that looked so much like him in the house. Getting up I pressed my ear to the door, more retching sounds.

Nope I definitely wasn't dreaming.

"I'll talk to her when she gets out, see if she's just not feeling well." I walked back to my dresser picking up a picture of the band.
I should probably make up the guest bed, I thought as I laid down on my mattress. In a minute.
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"Ashley....hey....Ashley...." I looked down at Ashley's sleeping form, a towel draped around my body, his shirt in my hand.

"Ok, if that's how it's going to be." I huffed turning away from him. I pulled the towel off with a swish and started drying my hair.
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"Ashley....hey...Ashley..." I tried to make a noise to tell her I was awake but nothing came out.

"Ok, if that's how it's going to be." hearing a swish I opened my eyes to see her bare back, pale, scarred, and gorgeous.
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Pulling on Ashley's shirt I let it drop. It came about mid-to-lower thigh so I could sleep in it easily. I began to turn around but
I felt strong arms wrap around my waist lifting me into the air.

"Ashley! You asshole put me down!!" I chuckled slapping his arm playfully.

"Ok but you asked for it!" I could see him grin out of the corner of my eye as he tossed me onto his bed, before getting on top of
me, tickling me.

"Ok so what do you want to do tonight?" I looked over at the clock seeing as it was only 3am I asked him if we could get
some sleep.

"Sure." He looked around before a look of panic crossed his strong face.

"What is it?" I asked softly.

"I forgot to make the guest bed, you'll have to sleep in here tonight." he looked at me to see if it was ok.

"Ok." I said before diving under the covers, Ashley right on my tail. Snuggling into his arms I let myself drift to sleep happy for
the first time in awhile.

Notes