What It Is To Burn

Dess and Kit laughed the entire way back to the house, both of them joking about Snobby Mindy and the look on her face when they both walked out of the store. Dess felt happy in that moment-the hard part of the wedding was over with and now she could relax over the next week or so with her best friend and the man of her dreams. She still felt sick and she knew she should probably go see a doctor, but there was just so much to do and Dess didn’t want the thought of her being sick to drag everyone else down, especially on this upcoming camping trip.

It was exciting to think of their little group camping out in the middle of nowhere and Dess smiled as she thought about how this had all come to fruition. They had all been sitting around after a show one night, drinking and talking about childhood vacations and Dess had mentioned that she and her family went camping a lot. That turned in to Ashley and CC making fun of her for being from the country and Dess retaliated by saying that they didn’t know the first thing about camping and probably wouldn’t survive three days in the wild. Then Dess got the bright idea of a pretour camping trip to allow everyone to just hang out as a group before they would be at each other’s throats all summer. Kit had gotten dragged in to the equation at Ashley’s request, which Dess found weird as she didn’t know that they had had much contact after their Thanksgiving meeting.


“You ready for this trip Kit?” Dess asked as the two girls sat at a stop light and Dess noticed that Kit had grown really quiet at her question. Any time Dess mentioned the trip or the band in general Kit grew quiet and almost seemed to be a little sad, which was strange as Kit was never sad.

“I suppose. As long as I don’t have to share my tent with any bassists I’ll be fine…”Kit said, her eyes staring out the passenger window and Dess could see a faint blush traveling up Kit’s neck. What was going on?

“Uh-well I mean we can work something out. I mean we’re taking the huge two room tent that sleeps six and then a few smaller tents…so you may have to sleep by yourself.” Dess said as she continued to drive down the highway and noticed that Kit was looking at her. The girl’s Kelly green eyes looked like they were on fire and Dess knew that Kit was wanting to tell her something.

“As long as my sleeping bag is on the other side of the tent I guess I’ll be fine…” Kit grumbled, her arms crossed over her chest and Dess only shot her a confused look as the car hit the gravel of the driveway and Dess sucked in a breath.


There, sitting right next to Andy’s Range Rover, was a small white car and Dess squinted her eyes as she pulled up next to it and she felt her anger build. Her mother. What was she doing here and how did she even know that Dess and Andy had bought the house? Andy had assured Dess-twice- that he had bought this house without her knowing that it was him. So why was her car sitting in their driveway? Dess shot Kit a look and the two girls got out of the car slowly, Dess looking at the car as she passed by and she felt her heartbeat quicken.

She didn’t want a confrontation with her mother right now-Dess just wanted to relax and not worry about anything right before the trip and seeing her mother was only going to cause a fight. She was still very angry with her mother for various things and Dess had even decided that her mother would not be present at her wedding, much to Andy’s displeasure.

He wanted the two women to patch things up, even though he wasn’t overly fond of Mrs. Montgomery, but you only get one mom in your life. Dess just ended up getting one that turned out to be pretty shitty. As the two girls walked up the front steps, Dess hesitantly pulled open the front door and was met by a delicious smell of baking cookies and soft laughter coming from the kitchen. She rushed down the hall, stopping at the entrance to the kitchen as she looked in and her mouth dropped open.

Her mother wasn’t here, but Aunt Kitty was. Currently the elderly woman was seated at her kitchen table, a photo album spread open on the surface as she pointed to a picture and smiled over at Ashley, who was seated right next to her. Ashley and Aunt Kitty-now there was a match made in perverted Heaven and Dess just stood back silently as she watched their encounter unfold.


“Here’s a picture of me when I was about your age dear. Now, this was taken in San Francisco right in the middle of the Summer of Love. My-I do believe I spent that entire summer practically naked…as you can see by the picture I had a very nice rack-even then.” Dess couldn’t see Ashley’s face, but she could see the picture that Aunt Kitty was pointing to and she felt a blush creep up her own neck. Aunt Kitty couldn’t have been more than twenty two at the time in this picture and she was sprawled out in the grass, her arms above her head as she smiled up at the camera, her shirtless chest out for all to see.

“Th-that is a very nice set you’ve got going on there…” Ashley stuttered as he moved his face closer to the album and Dess had to bite down on her own hand to keep from bursting out into loud laughter. Kit was standing next to her, doubled over in tears as the two of them watched probably the most uncomfortable encounter that they had ever seen.

“I slept with so many men that summer. Jim Morrison was my favorite though. He and Paul McCartney were two very wonderful lovers and they would always call me whenever they were in the San Fran area for a little afternoon delight.” Aunt Kitty was so innocent looking as she faced Ashley, her wide green eyes taking in the bassist silently.

“That is so great. I sometimes wish that I had been around back then…” Ashley said, obviously trying to steer the conversation elsewhere. Aunt Kitty wasn’t going to let that happen though.

“Oh yes! I bet you would have made a wonderful lover…I’m sure you’re splendid in bed as Dess tells me you spend a lot of time with various girls on your bus.” Dess smacked Kit hard as the red head had let out a puff of air and both girls were now on the floor, rolling around as the conversation continued and their presence remained unknown.

“Well Dess would know. She and Andy slept right below me, although they kept me awake a lot of the time while we were on tour…” Dess felt her eyes grow wide at this and Kit had to hold her back as she moved towards Ashley.

“Oh yes, Odessa was always a loud child…she would scream and holler and carry on almost all night when she was a toddler.” Dess felt her mouth drop open and she could only laugh as Kit hung from her shoulders, the red head was laughing so hard the she was shaking and Dess didn’t know what to do or say at this point.

“She does have a pair of lungs on her.” Ashley said as he looked up and noticed the two girls standing behind Aunt Kitty and he only smirked at Dess as he took in her red face.

“I’m sure Andrew can appreciate that-keeps the sex life exciting when you know that your lover is enjoying your talents so thoroughly…” Aunt Kitty, white haired and open as anything, she was going over board and suddenly Dess wondered how they had gotten on this topic and where was Andy in all of this?

“Andy is very talented.” Ashley said, shooting Dess a look of ‘What? He is!’ and all Dess could do was shake her head and hold Kit, who was still laughing so hard that she was crying, up as the two girls stood there.

“Now how big is he? I’m sure you’ve seen him-I know you boys aren’t shy around one another in those small dressing rooms. Those tight pants leave little to the imagination.” Dess felt her eyes grow wide as she rushed forward and smacked her hand against Ashley’s mouth. She smiled down at her aunt, who just sat there with a bewildered look on her face.

“Hello Aunty. When did you get in?” Dess asked as she removed her hand from Ash’s face and sat down next to her aunt.

“About an hour ago. Ashley here has been keeping me company since Andrew seems to have disappeared…” Dess smiled down at her aunt as the older woman smirked in Ash’s direction.

“Oh Kitty-it’s you who has been the delightfully entertaining one.” Ashley said, his words dripping with sweetness as he smiled first at the older woman and then looked to Kit, who was seated next to him, visibly uncomfortable at their closeness.


The group sat there and Dess smiled as she listened to Aunty Kitty talk about her times during the summer of love and she was enjoying the look on Ashley’s face as he took in this little old woman’s stories. Purdy had met his match it seemed as nothing he said really seemed to shock the older woman, but as Dess sat there she couldn’t help but wonder why Kitty was here or how she had even known that Dess would be here. She was glad that it had been Kitty sitting at her kitchen table and not her mother as Dess didn’t know what she would have done or what she would have said if it had been her mother.

Suddenly Andy appeared and Dess felt her mouth drop open as he stood in front of her in his tight ripped jeans and no shirt. His hair, his long hair had been hacked away and was very similar to the hair style that he’d had right before they had gotten together officially. What had he done and why was he smirking at her like that?


“What did you do?” Dess asked and everyone turned at her words and Ashley’s mouth dropped open and Kit only laughed loudly as she moved to cover her mouth with her hand. The only one who seemed to not be shocked was Aunt Kitty, who only looked at him with a small smile on her lips.

“I wanted a change. Don’t you like it?” Andy asked as he came over and sat down next to Dess, who said nothing as she reached out a hand to brush her fingers through his hair. It was shaved on one side, with his long bangs hanging in his face and the back was completely gone and all Andy could do was smirk at Dess as he sat next to her.

“I-I do. I’m just confused as to why you did it yourself instead of going to see someone.” Dess said as his hand dropped down to her lap and she trained her eyes on her great aunt.

“Didn’t really think I needed to go anywhere since I was just trimming the back…” Andy laughed as Dess only huffed, running her fingers through his hair once again and then she turned to face her aunt. Now to the question at hand.

“Aunt Kitty-while it’s great to see you-why are you here and how did you even know we lived here?” Dess asked as Andy reached out and grabbed her hand, squeezing it tightly as the table all trained their attention on the elderly woman who just sat there smiling.

“Well I’m here to give you an intervention Odessa Annemarie and I knew you lived here because dear Andrew told me when he called me to set this whole thing up.” Dess felt her heart stop as she looked away from her aunt and turned to face Andy. She glared at him and he knew he was in trouble by the look on her face and the blush that was creeping up his tattooed neck.

“What are you talking about Aunt Kitty?” Dess asked, confused as she sat there and felt Andy’s thumb rubbing circles across the top of her hand.

“You need to patch things up with your mother Odessa-“ At this Odessa was up and out of her chair, walking over towards the sink and she drowned out her aunt’s words with the running water that she had turned on to begin to wash dishes.

“Dess-listen to her…” Andy’s voice was in her ear, his arms wrapping around her waist as he turned them both to face the kitchen. Kit and Ashley were staring at her and her aunt was also looking at her, but it wasn’t the same concerned look that she was getting from her two close friends.

“Fine.” One word and Dess was back at the kitchen table, Andy’s arms around her as he held her in place and rested his chin on her shoulder. He knew that she was angry with him and he hoped that she would understand that he had done this for her own good.

“Odessa. Your mother feels very badly about everything that happened after Moira’s death, but understand dear that she was mourning herself and the thought of living in this house, alone, was more than she could bare. You own it now, think of all of this as a blessing…” Dess rolled her eyes at this. Her mother had all but disappeared after Moira died and Dess had been left alone, just like she and Moira had been left after their father died.

“Thanks to Andy and his generous ways, yes, we do own this house. But that doesn’t make up for her all but abandoning me, not once but twice-after dad died at least Moira and I had one another, but after she died I had no one…no one!” Dess raised her voice and suddenly Aunt Kitty’s fingers were gripping her chin as she shook Odessa softly, her crinkled green eyes on fire.

“Don’t. You. Dare speak to me in such a way Odessa Annemarie. Your father raised you better than that! Now quit being so fucking hardheaded and forgive your mother! She isn’t perfect and yes what she did was wrong, but don’t you dare let that ruin your relationship with her!” Aunt Kitty was pissed, more so than Dess had ever seen her and Dess said nothing as she just moved her head slightly to get her chin out of the old woman’s grasp.

“Aunt Kitty-I love you, but I cannot do this with you right now. Please tell my mother that she is welcome to come to the wedding if she wants to, but I am not going to waste my time or hers pretending like everything is peachy-fucking-keen.” Dess said this quickly and with one eye closed as she was pretty sure that Aunt Kitty would clock her across the face when she was done. Nope, the older woman quietly looked at her for a minute and then got up out of her chair and looked down at the small group.

“Very well Odessa. I’m going to leave now and I will give your mother the message. We will see you at the wedding. Andy-thank you so much for calling me and I’m sorry that you have to remain around someone has hardheaded and hardhearted as my great niece. Ashley-it was such a pleasure meeting you and I can’t wait to see you this fall. Katrina-your shirt is far too tight and you really ought to stop dressing like a hooker my dear. Goodbye!” While she spoke, Aunt Kitty was moving around the kitchen, grabbing her things and without a word from anyone the little old lady walked towards the front door, slamming it behind her as she left.


The group sat in stunned silence until finally Dess got up from the table and began to move around the kitchen. The other three spoke quietly to one another as Dess tried to work on getting dinner ready, chopping chicken silently at the counter as the other’s whispered behind her. How dare he? Andy-she loved him but dammit sometimes he went too far in his love and concern for her. Dess didn’t want to speak to her mother right now, so what?

She had every right to be angry and Dess needed to be angry at someone and why couldn’t it be her mother? As Dess mixed the chicken in with the spicy enchilada sauce, her nostrils burning from all of the spices, she sighed heavily and then heard the scrapping of a chair behind her. She moved towards the other end of the counter, keeping her eyes on her work as she quickly folded the enchiladas and placed them in a waiting dish.


“Babe?” Andy’s voice was in her ear and all Dess could do was shrug off his touch as he leaned in to place a hand on her shoulder.

“I’m busy Andy…” Dess said as she continued to work on their dinner and Andy only held on to her more tightly, an arm snaking around her waist as he pulled her to him, her back against his chest.

“Talk to me…”Andy was being insistent and with a huff Dess finished what she was doing and she turned to face him. Ashley and Kit were still sitting at the table, their eyes on the couple and Dess gave Kit a pointed look and suddenly the couple was in the kitchen a lone, Dess sprinkling cheese on top of their dinner before moving to put it into the oven.

“Talk to you about what? The betrayal I feel at you contacting my mother behind my back? Because we really should wait until we’re completely alone for that conversation to happen.” Dess snarled at him, her features dark as she looked up at him. He had her pinned against the stove, her back against the appliance as she faced him and suddenly his lips were on hers. She opened her mouth slightly and then he screeched out as she bit down on his tongue and pushed him away.

“Odessa! Quit being so fucking unfair!” Andy said, a slight lisp to his voice and Dess just glared at him as she moved to the sink to begin washing greens for a salad.

“Quit poking your pierced nose in to my business!” She yelled over her shoulder and suddenly his hands were on her again and as Andy spun Dess around to face him his heart ached. He only did this because he was worried about her and of course it was biting him in the ass.

“I’m just worried about you baby…you’re looking sicker and sicker every day and I don’t want anything to make you more stressed out.” Andy said, his arms around her shoulders as he pulled her tiny body against his and he shuddered. He could feel her collarbones poking him in the chest and in that moment Andy wanted to cry. Something was seriously wrong with Odessa and he was terrified as his mind landed on the only option. She was dying.

“The only thing stressing me out is you and your damn tour schedule. You know we only have a week off after the wedding before you guys start your touring and then lets not even get started on everything that’s going on this summer…” Dess mumbled against his chest and Andy only smiled. Things seemed to have calmed down, at least in the respect of Aunt Kitty and her ill-fated intervention.


Andy moved from Dess, kissing her softly on the lips before he left her alone in the kitchen to finish up getting dinner settled. Kit and Ashley were in the living room, neither of them speaking as they mindlessly seemed to be watching the television-what was going on? The two of them had been acting strangely ever since Kit and Dess had walked in the door and Andy was unsure, but he knew Ashley was never this quiet, especially around Kit.

The two flirts seemed to have bonded the past holiday season and it was confusing to watch them be so distant now. Andy only shrugged it off as he moved to sit next to Kit on the couch, smirking at the red head as she just stared at him, her eyes mere slits as she took him in. Kit and Andy had developed a strange friendship where they tolerated one another and occasionally joked around, but Dess would always be their common denominator.


“Dess looks really bad Andy, have you told her to go see a doctor?” Kit asked suddenly and Andy felt the hair on his neck bristle as he looked to the girl sitting next to him. Was she kidding right now? Of course he had encouraged Dess to go to the doctor-shit he’d even made her see a doctor while they were on tour. He couldn’t make Dess do anything that she didn’t want to do at this point.

“I know she looks bad and she has seen a doctor, but she won’t go. Hell-she won’t even talk to me about her health anymore Kat.” Kit sighed heavily as she looked into Andy’s blue eyes and saw his fear. They were both thinking the same thing and it was equally scary to both of them.

“Do you-do you think she’s sick?” Kit couldn’t bring herself to say the words and suddenly tears were springing to her eyes.


Kit remembered how bad Mr. Montgomery had gotten and how hard it had been on Dess to up and leave him to go out to her internship. Kit had been around, trying to keep Moira in line and she would never forgive herself for keeping Dess out of the loop at Momma Montgomery’s request. Kit had been here that night when he had passed and she had been next to Moira on the couch as Mrs. M called Dess and it made her cringe even to this day to hear the screaming and sobbing from Dess on the other line. Kit looked at Andy and in that moment she was thankful for him-they didn’t always see eye to eye but she knew that he loved Dess more than anything in this world and he would die for her. They both would die before allowing anything to happen to Odessa.


“I honestly don’t know Kit…she’s getting thinner by the week and she is always tired and-“ Andy stopped talking, his eyes growing wide as he looked over her shoulder and Kit cringed as she turned as well. Dess stood there, her arms crossed over her chest as she stared them down, on eyebrow raised with her hip leaning against the doorframe.

“And dinner is ready.” Her voice was deadly as Dess turned away from them all and walked back into the kitchen. Ashley was the first one up, followed by Andy and then Kit was the caboose as finally they all entered the kitchen, their stomachs grumbling at the delicious smell that wafted at them from the table.

“Everything looks really good D…” Kit said, her voice soft as she grabbed a plate and loaded it up. Dess had made chicken enchiladas, a salad and there was fresh salsa and guacamole with chips.

“Thanks…hopefully no one will catch my sickness when they eat it.” Her tone was pointed and her eyes angry as Dess looked at them before taking a seat at the wooden kitchen table.


Everyone served themselves and as Andy sat down next to Dess, he looked at her plate and his heart rose. She had loaded it up with food and hopefully this would encourage her to eat. Dess ate, Andy knew she ate like a trucker, but lately it seemed like she was forgetting to eat more than one meal a day and he knew it was his fault. Andy and his schedule kept Dess so stressed out as she tried to maneuver things around, especially their wedding and he knew that the stress was causing Dess to forget things. Like eating, or taking care of herself.

As they all finished up, Andy looked to Dess with an encouraging smile as he noticed her empty plate and he grabbed for it. He moved to the stove then, placing more food on his own plate as well as hers and when he sat back down she was looking at him, a scowl gracing her beautiful face.


“Did I ask for more?” Dess said, her arms crossed over her chest as she refused to touch her plate.

“No, but I think you should eat some more…” Andy pushed, his fingers resting on the edge of her plate as he scooted it closer to her.

“I think all three of you should mind your own fucking business…” Dess grumbled as Kit only sighed and sat back down. She had also gotten up to get seconds, mostly in the hopes that Dess would follow her lead and at least eat a little bit more.

“We’re just worried about you D…” Kit said between bites. Dess still just sat there, staring at all of them and leaving her second plate of food untouched.

“I get that and I’m worried about myself…but it scares me to think of what could really be wrong…” Dess felt the tears prick at her eyes and finally she let go.


What if she had cancer? What would happen to Andy if Dess died? They had become everything to one another and Dess wasn’t sure if he could hang in there if something every happened to her. She knew that she would be a wreck if the roles were reversed and so while she sat there and cried, Andy held her to him, kissing the top of her head and telling her that it would be okay. No matter what happened in her life, Dess knew that Andy would always try to make things okay.

Unfortunately it wasn’t always up to him.

Notes

Another update for you lovelies! Sadly it's coming to that time where updating is going to cease until after the Holidays. I think this upcoming wednesday will be the last update for all of my stories until some time after Christmas.

Read and review <3

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