What It Is To Burn

The tapping of her fingers against the wood of the kitchen table was the only thing keeping Dess calm in that moment. They had been home from tour for three days and while she was exhausted, Dess knew that she had a lot of things that needed to get done and Kit had volunteered to fly out and help her. Where was Kit? Late-as usual and Dess felt her nerves wearing thin. Today they were supposed to be going to do two very important things-flower shopping and dress shopping. Yes, today was the day that Dess was going to pick out her wedding dress and she had been extremely nervous about it all morning.

She had snapped at Andy, who had only asked if she wanted him to take out Winnie and after that he had retreated into the studio, sending her selfies every once and awhile but he was keeping his distance. Dess sighed loudly, looking down at her buzzing phone and a smile came to her face. There was a picture on her screen and it was of Kit and she was obviously standing in front of their front door as Dess could see her wreath in the background. She rushed to the door, her phone forgotten on the table and as Dess skidded against the front door she could hear Kit’s musical laughter from the other side.


“Kit Kat!”Dess yelled as she threw open the door and was met by her best friend, standing there with a goofy grin on her face and with open arms.

“Dess!” Kit yelled as she wrapped her arms around Dess’ neck and then pulled back to take her best friend in. Dess’ hair was back to blonde again, but it was streaked with bright pink and Kit couldn’t keep the smile off of her face-Dess Montgomery was getting back to her wild child self.

“Where have you been?! Come on! Tell me in the car!” Dess yelled, her voice happy as she grabbed for Kit’s hand and pulled the shorter girl towards the black SUV that sat in the driveway. Her beloved Rav-4 had sadly died shortly before the last tour, but Andy had made it up to her by buying her a newer model.

“Sorry! There was a crisis with Kellin and I had to walk them through everything as I was trying to get through the terminal. Forgive me?” Kit asked as she climbed in to the car and turned to Dess. Her best friend looked sick-thin and sallow and Kit cringed as she remembered the conversation that she’d had with a worried Andy over a month ago.

“Always a crisis with Kellin. Forgiven, but we’re going to be late if we don’t hurry the fuck up!” Dess yelled the last part to the car in front of her as they were coming up to a stop light and Kit just laughed. Dess had always had a touch of road rage, especially when she was under pressure.

“You feeling okay D? You look like you’ve lost a lot of weight…they not feeding you well enough on tour?” Kit had meant it as a joke, but Dess shot her an evil glare as she pushed down on the gas and the car shot forward. Dess really wished that everyone would just knock it off about her weight-she didn’t know why she was losing it and she was too scared to think about it right now.

“I’m fine. It’s just all of the touring and now getting everything ready for this wedding…I’m just a little stressed.” Dess said as she began to look to the left of her, trying to remember where this boutique was actually located.

“Well you and Andy picked out a venue yesterday right?” Kit asked, her hand reaching out to turn down the music. Black Veil Brides-of course Andy probably kept this going in the car 24/7.

“Yeah. It’s so gorgeous! It’s this huge Victorian mansion with a great view in the back of a river. The ceremony and reception will both be outside with a huge fire pit being lit towards the end…it’s going to be so beautiful.” Her voice was breathy as she spoke and Kit could only shake her head. She was happy for Dess-she had found her prince charming, but sometimes he had a real habit of acting like a huge frog.

“It’s still on Halloween right?” Kit asked, a smile on her face as Dess nodded and turned the car into a parking spot right out front. Dess just sat there, her hands on the wheel as she went over everything in her head.


The wedding was going to be in the late afternoon on October 31st, with the ceremony taking place outside by the river. Her colors were teal and chocolate brown, with orange and moss green accents throughout and Dess smiled as she thought over everything. While the ceremony was fall inspired, the reception was pure Halloween. Each table would be themed to a different movie monster, except for the Bride and Grooms table, which would be a surprise for Andy and Dess just smirked as she thought about it.

The food would be simple and fun, with a Mac and Cheese bar, sushi, and a sit down dinner and of course there would be a cake, which Dess was thrilled about because it fit both of their personalities perfectly. Andy had begged her to have a Batman themed wedding, but she only shook her head no, sticking to her guns on this one. Dess looked to Kit, smiling as the two girls exited the car and headed towards the building.


“Yeah. Ceremony starts at 5, with the reception starting at 7, but you’ll be with the wedding party and enter right before Andy and I in to the reception.” Dess smiled as she pulled open the door of the shop and motioned for Kit to go first. Dess looked around, her eyes zeroing in on all of the beautiful white dresses that were hung up around the walls of the small boutique.

“Hi! How can I help you today?” A chipper girl with dark blonde hair greeted them from behind a counter and Dess only smiled, her attention still spread thin as she thought of everything that she had to do.

“Uh-hi! I’m Odessa Montgomery and I have an appointment with Will at two. I’m here to pick out a wedding dress.” She smiled brightly at the younger girl, but her face clouded over as the girl finally took her in, staring down at her tattooed arms and then she placed a fake smile right back on those pretty pink lips.

“Oh-right. Will?!” The girl called over her shoulder and Dess felt her heart beat quicken. Why did people still have such a problem with girls like her and Kit? Kit wasn’t covered in tattoos, but she had quite a few and of course Dess had her sleeve, but that shouldn’t affect their treatment.

“Yes darling Mindy?” A male voice called out from the back and Dess only smiled as a light pink curtain was pulled back and a fabulous man stood before them. His jet black hair was styled in a faux hawk, his crisp white shirt tight across his chest and he had the cutest little pink bow tie on.

“Your two o’clock is here.” Mindy, the snob, said with a wave of her hand and Will’s eyes got huge as he took Odessa in. Blonde and pink hair, a shiny piercing in an adorable dimple and those eyes! Ack! He almost squealed in delight as he rushed towards the two girls and took Dess by the hand.

“I am so excited that you are here! Now I went over some of the things we talked about on the phone and I have dresses picked out for you to try on. I picked things out in every style we carry, just so we can see what you like and then we’ll go from there!” His voice was excited as Will linked arms with her and Dess couldn’t help but smile as she was led towards the back, Kit following behind with her middle finger held high behind her: a final salute to Mindy.


Dess smiled as she entered the room, Will flitting off in front of her and she took everything in. The room was lined with mirrors, the very center of the floor was raised up slightly almost like a pedestal and there were plush couches that faced the center of the room. Dess could hear Will giggling from somewhere off to her right and she just smiled-it was nice having someone else be so excited about this entire process and in that moment Dess began to miss Moira.

Her little sister should be here for this-she would have been a huge support for Dess and while Andy was always there for her, he had things on his mind and he also wanted to keep as far away from the wedding planning as possible. Finally Will reappeared and grabbed Dess by the hand, pulling her behind a curtain where there were five dresses hanging all around her. He motioned for Dess to pick one and without missing a beat she grabbed the nearest dress and giggled as Will helped her to get everything in place.


“Ready?” Dess called out and Kit just grunted from her seat on the couch, her nose buried in her phone. Kellin was having another crisis, and of course Kit was the only one brave enough to get him off of that ledge that he always teetered on. He was a new dad and Kit understood that, but he also had a job to do. Kit raised her head as someone in front of her cleared their throat and as she looked up she scrunched her nose.

“No?” Dess asked, looking to her best friend who just sat there with a disgusted look on her face. The dress was a pretty mermaid number that was heart shaped in the bust, but Dess didn’t have the hips to fill it out the way it should have been. Next.

“Eh, what else you got?” Kit asked as Dess only smiled and disappeared back behind the curtain. Kit sighed-she would be with Dess for two weeks and was being dragged on to this camping trip that was happening in a few days and then the group would be flown out to LA to meet up with the tour. Andy and Kellin were both shooting for AP-both of them were also making appearances at the AP tent all summer and it was a logistics nightmare.

“How about this one?” Dess was back and while the dress, an A-line that had a teal sash and gorgeous beading detail on the bodice, it was pretty, but it wasn’t Dess. This dress was one that someone who wasn’t confident would wear and Dess was full of confidence, sometimes to a fault.

“Eh…” Kit waved her hand back and forth and Dess only nodded her head as she disappeared again. Where was Momma Montgomery? Shouldn’t she be present for all of these wedding dress shenanigans?

“Kit!” Dess laughed and Kit only smiled as she looked up and her breath caught in her throat. This. This was it, plain and simple and from the tears spilling down Dess’ cheeks it was the obvious choice.

“Oh-oh my God D…you look utterly…I mean…Wow.” Kit was speechless, which was enough for Dess as the girl was never speechless. Dess turned to Will, who was also weeping quietly and she could only smile.

“C-can I try it on with a veil?” She asked, her voice small and Will only nodded as he moved away from her for a minute and then was back with a gauzy looking veil in his hands. He pinned it to her head, right behind her bangs and Dess spun around. This was it-she was positive that this would be the dress to take Andy’s breath away.

“Exquisite! Now are you keeping your hair this color for the wedding?” Will asked as Dess only turned to him, reaching up to remove the veil and she smiled. She had changed her hair so much lately that Dess really wasn’t sure, but she would probably be solid blonde for the wedding. That’s what she looked like when she and Andy had met and it would remind her of their first times together.

“I-“ Dess was cut off by a loud noise coming from Kit’s direction.

“…living like a King someday, a single night without a ghost in the walls!” Kellin’s voice rang out from Kit’s phone and the red head only blushed as she held the phone up to her ear and smirked apologetically at the other two.

“Oh, hey Andy. Yeah. Yes, I know she left her phone at home. Yes. Yes she picked out a dress. No! Andy I’m not going to take a picture nor am I going to describe any of it to you. Yes. No. Oh-joy. O-kay, well we’ll be back in a bit. Bye!” Kit only rolled her eyes as she ended the call and looked up to see both Dess and Will staring down at her, both of them wide eyed and Will was even tapping his loafer shoed foot against the white carpet.

“Andy?” Dess asked as she reached down and fluffed at the skirt of her dress. She was falling even more in love with it as she stood there.

“Yes. He wanted to know if you knew that you had left your phone at home. Did you pick out a dress? Could he see it? Would I give him a hint? Will we be home for dinner? Did I care what we ate and oh-Ashley had shown up and will be staying with us until after the camping trip. Oh and Andy said he loves you and misses you…bleh.” Kit opened her mouth and pretended to throw up as Dess only laughed and turned towards Will.


As Dess took her dress off, Kit thought over this whole wedding thing. She had her own dress picked out, a cute teal dress that showed off her rack and amazing legs and she couldn’t wait to see the look on Ashley Purdy’s face when she joined him to walk down the aisle. Kit sighed-she wanted a love like Dess and Andy’s, something that seemed so perfect that it was hard to believe that it was even real. For a while Kit had thought that a certain bassist could have been her prince, but his wandering eyes and fingers just proved that he was king of the frogs.

No one, not even Dess or Andy, knew about Ash and Kit or their uh-relationship and Kit hoped that it would stay that way. The next few weeks-shit-the entire summer, was going to be very interesting. Kit would mostly be occupied with directing Sirens around and she knew that Dess would be busy with her clothing tent and helping keep Andy grounded, but the two best friends were hopeful that they would see one another at least for a bit every day.


“You ready to head out Kit Kat?” Dess asked from behind her and Kit jumped at the sudden noise in the room. She turned and saw that Dess was once again wearing the cut off shorts, black lace crop top and studded ankle boots that she had walked in wearing.

“Absolutely!” Kit would be more than happy to get away from all the pink and both girls laughed as they walked towards the front. Will kissed them both on the cheek, bidding them goodbye and Kit shot Mindy the Snob another death glare before letting the glass front door shut behind her.


The girls walked down the sidewalk, Dess saying that the flower shop was only a few blocks down and Kit was happy to be out in the sunshine. She had been cooped up in a recording studio all winter with the guys and now she would be cooped up on a bus with them the entire summer. Yes, Sleeping With Sirens would be touring with a bus, their white van being relegated to Kellin’s driveway at Kit’s insistence. She could stand sleeping in the van when they were only touring for a few weeks, but two and half months-Kit needed her space and she would need an available shower and place to relax. So they were touring on a bus and Kit was sleeping easier these days at that thought.


“You have the funniest look on your face Kit-you okay?” Dess asked as Kit only nodded and followed her best friend as the two girls entered the flower shop, getting out of the heat thankfully. The shop smelled wonderful and Kit could get lost in here there were so many flowers and arrangements to stare at.

“How may I help you girls?” Kit turned towards the front counter and was met with a little old lady standing there, smiling at the two of them.

“Hi, are you Margaret? I’m Odessa Montgomery and I spoke to you on the phone about some flowers for my wedding this October.” Dess had said all of this in one breath. Obviously her nerves were getting the best of her and Kit only smiled as she placed an encouraging hand on her bff’s shoulder and squeezed lightly.

“Why hello dear! Yes, I remember talking to you! Come on to the back, I have your samples all ready if you want to take a look.” The two girls followed the older woman to an area behind the counter and Kit was amazed at Dess. The poor girl, in all of her sickness and touring duties, had still managed to pick out exactly what she wanted and from the arrangements on the table, Dess had an eye for these things.


Kit looked over everything and tears came to her eyes. The tall arrangement that Kit knew would be placed on the couple’s reception table was interesting, with deep Violets, bright yellow Calla Lilies and white roses, all winding down a tall vase with ivy and Baby’s Breath falling down to the table. Each table would get a small center piece, mostly with candles and then Dess had picked out small props and trinkets that would be appropriate to each movie monster.

The Brides Bouquet was at the very end and Kit couldn’t help but reach out and touch the soft petals of the burnt orange Roses, moss green Roses and there were some twigs and branches sticking out and Dess looked like she was about to cry standing there. All of the Bride’s Maids(there were only four of them) would have smaller versions of Dess’, except for one thing.


“Here’s the special request that you asked of my dear…” Margaret was right beside Dess, holding out her palm as the two girls looked down and Kit felt like crying.


Two small black and white photos, no bigger than stamps, were lying face up and Kit found that she was looking down at Moira and Mr. Montgomery. The pictures were edged in delicate lace, with small holes punched into them and there were two white strings hanging down, which would be tied to Dess’ bouquet right before she walked down the aisle. Kit heard Dess cry out as she placed a finger on the two pictures and then turned to Kit.

The two girls held one another as they cried softly and Kit could feel her heart breaking as she held her best friend. Odessa had been through so much in her life and like any girl she only wanted her father to walk her down the aisle on her special day. Mr. Montgomery couldn’t do that, although Kit knew that he and Moira would be cheering the couple on from Heaven, but with these two pictures traveling with Dess down the aisle as she walked towards Andy, Kit knew that they would be well represented.


“Thank you so much Margaret-everything is so beautiful and I can’t wait to see it all on the day…” Dess sniffled as she reached out and hugged the older woman.

“It’s no problem dear. It’s not every day that I get a client who knows so much about her flowers and what they mean. I am truly thrilled to be doing this and don’t worry…that special flower you requested will be hidden well within your bouquet.” The older woman winked at the girls as she escorted them out to the front of the store.


Kit followed Dess down the street-they were headed towards the car and then headed home and Kit felt like she was going to be sick. Ashley Purdy would be there and she was afraid to think of what she would do or say to the bassist when she saw him, that smug smirk on those perfect lips. Oh! Kit felt agitated, mostly at herself, for giving in to Ash and his charming ways. At first she had blown him off, played a game of Kitty Kat and mouse with him, but eventually Ashley had charmed her into a date.

One date turned in to three and then they had slept together, which had been amazing, but then the guys had gone on tour for fucking ever and Ashley stopped calling. Dess had kept Kit posted on all of the tour shenanigans that had gone on, including Ashley’s penchant for big breasted women and Kit had tried to play it cool. She was a band manager for Christ sake-she knew what they were like. Deep down though Kit had thought that maybe she could tame the wild Purdy. She was sadly mistaken.

Lost in thought, with more Black Veil Brides playing in the background, Kit stared off in front of her. She missed Virginia, but the guys were split between Michigan and Florida and she followed the band. Shit-Kit didn’t even really have a home anymore…living with Justin Hills had not been her first choice, but it was easier than having her own place and having to worry about getting someone to take care of everything. Kit looked to Dess in that moment and she felt some jealousy towards her best friend of over ten years. Dess was always so put together-her hair was always done, she had some of the best clothes and she had someone like Andy. Kit was not Andy’s biggest fan, but neither was Dess and Kit loved that fact.

Even though he could be such a shit, Kit was finding more and more that Andrew Biersack wasn’t such a bad guy after all. Hopefully he wouldn’t prove her wrong over this upcoming summer.

Notes

Kit's back and badder than ever! Dess' dress is gorgeous and I can't wait for you guys to see it...but not until Andy sees it first *winkwink*

Please read this and give it some love because it needs love right now. <3

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