Through Pain of Heart Or Loss of Mind
Chapter 9: Image
The show had been incredible! About half of the crowd sang and screamed along with me and Jason, and I'd also noticed that one fan who we had run into at the airport, he had been in front of the crowd the entire time. The whole experience had been amazing and I couldn't believe we'd be doing this for almost two months!
Right now, Jason and I were walking back to the tour bus, hand in hand. Amelia had left after the show to go find C.C. and Marcus had decided to go along with her. As Jason and I walked into the bus, my phone rang and I took it out of my back pocket to find that it was our manager, Dimitri. I let go of Jason's hand and answered, sitting down on the small couch.
"Hey, what's up Dimitri?"
"Hey! Um, earlier I forgot to mention that you guys have a signing at 4:15 at your merch tent." I looked at the time on my phone. It was 3:42.
"Fuck, dude! Way to be on top of things!"
"Well, don't keep the fans waiting! And I'm sorry for not mentioning it earlier, I was a bit... preoccupied. Well, bye!" He hung up and I put my phone back in my pocket and got up. Jason looked at me with a furrowed brow.
"What's going on?" He asked me as I walked out the door and he followed.
"We have a signing in about thirty minutes and we need to get Marcus and Amelia."
"Well, it shouldn't be that hard. They're probably at Black Veil Brides' tour bus."
"Yeah, probably." Me and Jason walked towards the bus and noticed Andy outside smoking a cigarette. He looked up and smirked, flicking his cigarette.
"Hey, Biersack. Are Amelia and Marcus inside?" He took a drag from his cigarette and looked back up at me, blowing smoke out of his mouth.
"No, I haven't seen 'em come by. You guys about to play a show?" he flicked his cigarette again.
"We already played but apparently we have a signing in twenty five minutes. Where's C.C.?"
"Inside, along with everyone else. Why?" I furrowed my brow and looked up Jason. Where the hell were they? Jason took out his phone and called Marcus, it going to voicemail. He called Amelia also but the same thing occurred. Well, fuck. We had to find them soon.
MARCUS' POV
As Amelia and I walked towards the buses, side by side, the nervous feeling in my stomach grew. This moment would be perfect to talk to her about my thoughts about her and I needed to do this. I needed to start taking chances. I slowed down my pace and Amelia looked back at me with an arched eyebrow.
"Amelia, I need to talk to you." I stopped walking and she stood a few feet in front of me.
"Uh.. right now?"
"Yeah... right now. This can't wait." She took a step closer to me and crossed her arms.
"Well, alright. What is it?" My stomach flipped and my palms became sweaty. I was getting nauseous.
"Could we sit down first?" We walked over to a nearby bus and sat down, our backs against it. She looked at me expectantly. I looked down at my hands.
"Um, Amelia, I've been, uh, wanting to tell you... for the longest time-"
"If you're going to tell me that you like me, you should at least say it confidently," she stood up and brushed off her pants, "and also, you're pretty much too late." She started walking away as I got up, anger rising in my chest.
"What the fuck, Amelia?! I finally get the nerve to talk to you and you just fucking blow me off?! You could've at least let me finish fucking talking!" She turned around and looked at me with wide eyes. I had never yelled at her like this.
"Well, I'm sorry that you took too fucking long to tell me! For the past two months, I've been trying to get you to notice!"
"If you wanted me to notice so badly then why didn't you just fucking tell me?!" We were now basically in each others faces, but I wasn't backing down.
"Because! It's the guys job to tell the girl how they feel!" She was really starting to piss me off.
"Fine! You want me to tell you how I fucking feel! Well, here it fucking is! Amelia, I've loved you for the past year that we've all been living together and I've always been too damn afraid to ever fucking tell you! I'm a fucking pussy, alright!" She backed up a bit and looked at me with wide eyes. Her shocked expression soon turned into a smile and she started chuckling. What?
She stepped closer to me and wrapped her arms around my neck, looking up at me.
"You're right, you are. But you weren't just now, now were you?" She leaned up and kissed me on the lips, my whole mind and body in shock. She'd wanted me to react that way.
"You know, this would probably be a lot better if you actually kissed me back." She smirked up at me and I couldn't help but smile. I leaned down and kissed her soft lips, laying my hands on her waist as her arms wrapped tighter around my neck. I kept waiting for the moment when I'd wake up but it never came and I smiled in our kiss. She pulled back and smiled.
"You kept me waiting for a while, I was starting to think you really didn't like me and I was just being a fool. But from what you said I guess I had the wrong impression." She smirked and kept her arms around my neck. I kissed her lightly again on the lips and pulled back.
"So what are you going to do with C.C.?" She frowned and furrowed her brow.
"I really don't know. I hadn't really thought about it actually." She took a step back and thought about it.
"Well, fuck. Now I feel terrible." I was about to tell her that he would probably not have a huge problem with it but just then Mircee and Jason came running towards.
"Damn guys. I was beginning to panic." Mircee had her phone in her hand and I arched an eyebrow.
"Why?"
"Apparently, we have a signing in fifteen minutes at our merch tent that Dimitri failed to mention to us earlier. We just found out half an hour ago." said Jason.
"Oh wow, well then should we head over to the tent now?" Amelia stepped beside me and grabbed my arm, turning me around so we were heading toward the tents and stages.
"Uh. yeah." said Mircee from behind me. The scene in front of her probably surprising her as Amelia slid her hand into mine.
MIRCEE'S POV
As we all sat down for the signing, I grinned as I looked at the line of people whistling and shouting, waving their posters in the air. I sat at the end with Jason beside me and having Amelia then Marcus being first to be signing. I took the black sharpie in my hand as they started letting people through.
As I signed a poster, I looked up to a familiar face. It was the guy again from the airport.
"Well, hey. I swear I've seen you so many times that I'm beginning to think you're stalking us." He laughed as I handed him his poster.
"No, I'm just a huge fan and of course, you're always a nice piece of eye candy." He winked and smiled at me as I laughed and he walked away, the next fan setting down their poster in front of me. As I signed it, I heard the girl gasp and I looked up to see her staring at something behind me. I turned around to see Ashley smirking at me. I turned back around, handing the poster to the girl as she slowly walked away.
"What's up, Purdy?" I went on signing as he kneeled down on my left.
"Hello there, darling. I just wanted to stop by and say I enjoyed that show you put on."
"Oh, did you now? I didn't even notice you were there."
"I was backstage so I'm not surprised, but I do have to say that you looked pretty sexy from behind." I looked at him and he winked at me. I chuckled and shook my head.
"I don't think it'd be a good idea to flirt with me like that, Purdy." He grinned and raised an eyebrow.
"Oh? And why not?" I felt someone's hand rest on my thigh and Jason's head appeared on my shoulder.
"Because, unfortunately, my friend, she's taken." He kissed me on the lips and I pulled back, surprised.
"Oh.." Ashley stood up and brushed off his black leather pants. He chuckled and then looked back down at both of us, "Well then, I wish ya'll the best." He winked again at me and walked away. I looked back at Jason whose face was inches from mine.
"So I'm taken, huh?" I smirked and he grinned.
"Well, I figured last night pretty much noted that." He slid his hand into mine and I grinned.
"Well, I guess so," He leaned forward and kissed me on the lips, "and by the way, someone's waiting for you." I pointed to the tall, lanky guy looking down at him.
"Oh, shit. I'm sorry about that, man." He let go of my hand and grabbed the poster, quickly handing it to me. I signed it and it handed it back to the fan.
"Hope you're having a fucking great ass day!" I said to him and he smiled, nodding and then walking away. I looked back to my front to find that that was the last person. We all stood up and headed back to the tour bus.
"Agh. I can't wait to go to sleep." I grumbled as we slowly made our way through the crowds of people. It was only five in the evening but I was exhausted, and besides I wanted to draw an image that had been burned in my mind. I would probably stay up to draw before I passed out.
As we walked into the bus, I rushed to get some clothes and was the first one to hop into the shower.
It felt wonderful as I washed off all the sweat and grime off my body. I stood in there for a few minutes, letting the hot water rain over my body as I thought about what wouldn't leave my mind. The image of Andy leaning on the bus and smoking his cigarette stayed in my head and I couldn't shake it off. It had just looked like it was meant to be photographed, like how anything else he did looked like it should've been. I shook my head. He was a cocky guy, anyone would be able to call that from all the selfies he posts on twitter, but there was something about him that maybe I was wrong about...
I got out of the shower and dried off, putting on my clothes as someone knocked on the door.
"Hey Mircee, are you almost done 'cause I gotta use the bathroom."
I opened the door to see Jason smiling down at me. I guess this whole deal between us really made him pleased. I walked out as he walked in behind me.
"Thank you, madam." He went to close the door but I stopped him before he did.
"Oh hey, I'm gonna draw in a minute. I just wanted to let you know." He frowned a bit but nodded and closed the door. They understood that when I drew, I wanted no one around me. It was weird but I just felt so uncomfortable doing it especially when they were breathing down my neck, making it hard to draw.
I walked to my bunk and found my sketchbook and pencil, making my way to the front of the bus. Amelia was sitting at the table looking at her phone.
"Um, hey Amelia. It's that time again." I said as I waved my sketchbook in the air. She looked up at me and groaned. She got up and walked to the back of the bus.
"Thank you." I said.
"Yeah, no problem."
I sat down and started drawing, gradually bringing the image to life on paper.
Right now, Jason and I were walking back to the tour bus, hand in hand. Amelia had left after the show to go find C.C. and Marcus had decided to go along with her. As Jason and I walked into the bus, my phone rang and I took it out of my back pocket to find that it was our manager, Dimitri. I let go of Jason's hand and answered, sitting down on the small couch.
"Hey, what's up Dimitri?"
"Hey! Um, earlier I forgot to mention that you guys have a signing at 4:15 at your merch tent." I looked at the time on my phone. It was 3:42.
"Fuck, dude! Way to be on top of things!"
"Well, don't keep the fans waiting! And I'm sorry for not mentioning it earlier, I was a bit... preoccupied. Well, bye!" He hung up and I put my phone back in my pocket and got up. Jason looked at me with a furrowed brow.
"What's going on?" He asked me as I walked out the door and he followed.
"We have a signing in about thirty minutes and we need to get Marcus and Amelia."
"Well, it shouldn't be that hard. They're probably at Black Veil Brides' tour bus."
"Yeah, probably." Me and Jason walked towards the bus and noticed Andy outside smoking a cigarette. He looked up and smirked, flicking his cigarette.
"Hey, Biersack. Are Amelia and Marcus inside?" He took a drag from his cigarette and looked back up at me, blowing smoke out of his mouth.
"No, I haven't seen 'em come by. You guys about to play a show?" he flicked his cigarette again.
"We already played but apparently we have a signing in twenty five minutes. Where's C.C.?"
"Inside, along with everyone else. Why?" I furrowed my brow and looked up Jason. Where the hell were they? Jason took out his phone and called Marcus, it going to voicemail. He called Amelia also but the same thing occurred. Well, fuck. We had to find them soon.
MARCUS' POV
As Amelia and I walked towards the buses, side by side, the nervous feeling in my stomach grew. This moment would be perfect to talk to her about my thoughts about her and I needed to do this. I needed to start taking chances. I slowed down my pace and Amelia looked back at me with an arched eyebrow.
"Amelia, I need to talk to you." I stopped walking and she stood a few feet in front of me.
"Uh.. right now?"
"Yeah... right now. This can't wait." She took a step closer to me and crossed her arms.
"Well, alright. What is it?" My stomach flipped and my palms became sweaty. I was getting nauseous.
"Could we sit down first?" We walked over to a nearby bus and sat down, our backs against it. She looked at me expectantly. I looked down at my hands.
"Um, Amelia, I've been, uh, wanting to tell you... for the longest time-"
"If you're going to tell me that you like me, you should at least say it confidently," she stood up and brushed off her pants, "and also, you're pretty much too late." She started walking away as I got up, anger rising in my chest.
"What the fuck, Amelia?! I finally get the nerve to talk to you and you just fucking blow me off?! You could've at least let me finish fucking talking!" She turned around and looked at me with wide eyes. I had never yelled at her like this.
"Well, I'm sorry that you took too fucking long to tell me! For the past two months, I've been trying to get you to notice!"
"If you wanted me to notice so badly then why didn't you just fucking tell me?!" We were now basically in each others faces, but I wasn't backing down.
"Because! It's the guys job to tell the girl how they feel!" She was really starting to piss me off.
"Fine! You want me to tell you how I fucking feel! Well, here it fucking is! Amelia, I've loved you for the past year that we've all been living together and I've always been too damn afraid to ever fucking tell you! I'm a fucking pussy, alright!" She backed up a bit and looked at me with wide eyes. Her shocked expression soon turned into a smile and she started chuckling. What?
She stepped closer to me and wrapped her arms around my neck, looking up at me.
"You're right, you are. But you weren't just now, now were you?" She leaned up and kissed me on the lips, my whole mind and body in shock. She'd wanted me to react that way.
"You know, this would probably be a lot better if you actually kissed me back." She smirked up at me and I couldn't help but smile. I leaned down and kissed her soft lips, laying my hands on her waist as her arms wrapped tighter around my neck. I kept waiting for the moment when I'd wake up but it never came and I smiled in our kiss. She pulled back and smiled.
"You kept me waiting for a while, I was starting to think you really didn't like me and I was just being a fool. But from what you said I guess I had the wrong impression." She smirked and kept her arms around my neck. I kissed her lightly again on the lips and pulled back.
"So what are you going to do with C.C.?" She frowned and furrowed her brow.
"I really don't know. I hadn't really thought about it actually." She took a step back and thought about it.
"Well, fuck. Now I feel terrible." I was about to tell her that he would probably not have a huge problem with it but just then Mircee and Jason came running towards.
"Damn guys. I was beginning to panic." Mircee had her phone in her hand and I arched an eyebrow.
"Why?"
"Apparently, we have a signing in fifteen minutes at our merch tent that Dimitri failed to mention to us earlier. We just found out half an hour ago." said Jason.
"Oh wow, well then should we head over to the tent now?" Amelia stepped beside me and grabbed my arm, turning me around so we were heading toward the tents and stages.
"Uh. yeah." said Mircee from behind me. The scene in front of her probably surprising her as Amelia slid her hand into mine.
MIRCEE'S POV
As we all sat down for the signing, I grinned as I looked at the line of people whistling and shouting, waving their posters in the air. I sat at the end with Jason beside me and having Amelia then Marcus being first to be signing. I took the black sharpie in my hand as they started letting people through.
As I signed a poster, I looked up to a familiar face. It was the guy again from the airport.
"Well, hey. I swear I've seen you so many times that I'm beginning to think you're stalking us." He laughed as I handed him his poster.
"No, I'm just a huge fan and of course, you're always a nice piece of eye candy." He winked and smiled at me as I laughed and he walked away, the next fan setting down their poster in front of me. As I signed it, I heard the girl gasp and I looked up to see her staring at something behind me. I turned around to see Ashley smirking at me. I turned back around, handing the poster to the girl as she slowly walked away.
"What's up, Purdy?" I went on signing as he kneeled down on my left.
"Hello there, darling. I just wanted to stop by and say I enjoyed that show you put on."
"Oh, did you now? I didn't even notice you were there."
"I was backstage so I'm not surprised, but I do have to say that you looked pretty sexy from behind." I looked at him and he winked at me. I chuckled and shook my head.
"I don't think it'd be a good idea to flirt with me like that, Purdy." He grinned and raised an eyebrow.
"Oh? And why not?" I felt someone's hand rest on my thigh and Jason's head appeared on my shoulder.
"Because, unfortunately, my friend, she's taken." He kissed me on the lips and I pulled back, surprised.
"Oh.." Ashley stood up and brushed off his black leather pants. He chuckled and then looked back down at both of us, "Well then, I wish ya'll the best." He winked again at me and walked away. I looked back at Jason whose face was inches from mine.
"So I'm taken, huh?" I smirked and he grinned.
"Well, I figured last night pretty much noted that." He slid his hand into mine and I grinned.
"Well, I guess so," He leaned forward and kissed me on the lips, "and by the way, someone's waiting for you." I pointed to the tall, lanky guy looking down at him.
"Oh, shit. I'm sorry about that, man." He let go of my hand and grabbed the poster, quickly handing it to me. I signed it and it handed it back to the fan.
"Hope you're having a fucking great ass day!" I said to him and he smiled, nodding and then walking away. I looked back to my front to find that that was the last person. We all stood up and headed back to the tour bus.
"Agh. I can't wait to go to sleep." I grumbled as we slowly made our way through the crowds of people. It was only five in the evening but I was exhausted, and besides I wanted to draw an image that had been burned in my mind. I would probably stay up to draw before I passed out.
As we walked into the bus, I rushed to get some clothes and was the first one to hop into the shower.
It felt wonderful as I washed off all the sweat and grime off my body. I stood in there for a few minutes, letting the hot water rain over my body as I thought about what wouldn't leave my mind. The image of Andy leaning on the bus and smoking his cigarette stayed in my head and I couldn't shake it off. It had just looked like it was meant to be photographed, like how anything else he did looked like it should've been. I shook my head. He was a cocky guy, anyone would be able to call that from all the selfies he posts on twitter, but there was something about him that maybe I was wrong about...
I got out of the shower and dried off, putting on my clothes as someone knocked on the door.
"Hey Mircee, are you almost done 'cause I gotta use the bathroom."
I opened the door to see Jason smiling down at me. I guess this whole deal between us really made him pleased. I walked out as he walked in behind me.
"Thank you, madam." He went to close the door but I stopped him before he did.
"Oh hey, I'm gonna draw in a minute. I just wanted to let you know." He frowned a bit but nodded and closed the door. They understood that when I drew, I wanted no one around me. It was weird but I just felt so uncomfortable doing it especially when they were breathing down my neck, making it hard to draw.
I walked to my bunk and found my sketchbook and pencil, making my way to the front of the bus. Amelia was sitting at the table looking at her phone.
"Um, hey Amelia. It's that time again." I said as I waved my sketchbook in the air. She looked up at me and groaned. She got up and walked to the back of the bus.
"Thank you." I said.
"Yeah, no problem."
I sat down and started drawing, gradually bringing the image to life on paper.
8/15/13