Saviour
Remind You Not to Bleed
I wake up to find Valerey not in our bunk. I check my phone and it’s only 2 A.M. I get up and walk to the front of the bus to the kitchen area. She’s not there so I walk back to the back of the bus and find that she’s not there either. The bathroom door is open, but I check there just in case. What I find is horrible. There’s a razor blade sitting on a blood stained sink.
I go and wake up Ella and tell her what’s going on. She looks at me confused for a moment, then gets up, puts her jacket on and heads to the front of the bus. We’ve stopped at a rest stop for the night since we have a day off from tour. Ella and I head outside to look around. There’s a lake down a hill from the rest stop so we decide to check there first.
We rush down to the lake and start searching. God, where could she be? I just had to tell her that Andy may have found her parents. More importantly, Andy had to go looking for her parents.
“Over here!” I hear Ella call. I run over to where she is and am horrified by the sight in front of me. She had carved the words ‘failure’, ‘worthless’, and ‘hate’ into the skin on her arms. This time, however, there were no cuts along her wrists. Hopefully that means she hadn’t been trying to kill herself.
“She’s still alive, right?” I ask quietly, holding back tears.
“Well she’s still breathing” Ella replies equally as quiet.
Ella pulls out her phone and dials 911 for an ambulance. As she’s talking with the operator, I get a text from Jake asking where Val, Ella and I are.
--We’re down by the lake down the hill from the rest stop. Valerey’s hurt herself again—I text back.
--Shit, dude, I’m gonna wake up Andy, CC, and Ash and we’re gonna come down there—
--Actually, can you wait up there for the ambulance? Me and Ella are gonna try and bring her up—
--will do—
And with that I lift her up and carry her bridal style up the hill. When we get up there we find the ambulance waiting for us. The EMS guys take Valerey from me and put her on a stretcher and push her into the back. I climb in after them. The other five are gonna wake up Jon and head to the hospital.
When we make it there, they rush Valerey back to a room and hook her up to life support. Some of the cuts required stitches. After about an hour the doctor comes in and tells me that she will live, but will be in a coma for a few days. A few minutes after that, Jake, Andy, Ella, CC, Ashley, and Jon come into the room.
“They said she’ll be out for a few days, but will live” I tell them as they enter.
“We’re not going to be able to make it to the last two shows of Warped” Jon says
“I’m just rhythm guitar, they can do a couple shows without me” I say. I don’t want to let the fans down, the guys have to perform.
“You sure?” Jake asks
“Yea, I’ll be fine” I reply
“I’ll stay here with you if you want.” Ella offers
“No, you should be with Jake for the last few shows since you have to go back to Europe after them.” I say and she gives me a hug.
“I’ll check in every night through a text” She whispers to me and then her and the guys leave.
When they leave I sit back in the chair and close my eyes. I can’t believe this. I can’t believe I let this happen, I’m probably the reason it happened. I’m just glad she’s going to be okay. I lean forward and rest my arms on my legs and my face in my hands and start crying. Why does she have to go through this? She’s the sweetest girl ever; why would her parents leave, it just doesn’t make sense…
I wake up with my arms and head rested on the side of her bed. I don’t remember when I fell asleep or even falling asleep. I check my phone to see what time it is. 9 P.M the day after we got here. I slept two entire days. How I managed that, I’m not sure. I usually can’t get more than a few hours of sleep at a time.
I pull my phone back up and check Twitter. Almost all of my mentions are filled with hate. ‘Why did I skip Warped’, ‘You’re so selfish’, things like that. As I’m scrolling through I find one that says “I hope you’re alright and everything’s fine with Valerey. I know you wouldn’t skip Warped for no reason. Ily, Jinxx” It’s nice knowing there are some sane people out there… I reply with “Thanks for understanding. Everything’s fine, I just can’t be on Warped for the remaining shows”
I put my phone down and get up to move to the side of Valerey’s bed. I crouch down and kiss her cheek.
“I love you and I always will” I whisper to her, hoping she can hear me even though she’s in a coma.
My stomach starts growling and I remember that I haven’t eaten in three days. I’ve been here for two and didn’t eat at all the day before this happened. I go into the cafeteria and find a vending machine. I put a dollar into it and punch in the number for the bag of Cheese-its. I go back to the room with Valerey and eat about half the small bag. I don’t really feel up to eating much.
Just as I sit back down I get a text from Ella.
--How’s Val doing? — is the first one from around 8 last night.
--Jinxx you okay? — Another reads about 3 minutes after the first.
--I’m just gonna assume you’re asleep. Please answer when you wake up though— from a few minutes later
--Is Val doing okay? — reads the one I just got.
--yea, she’s fine. Sorry I didn’t reply last night I just woke up an hour ago—
--That’s good to hear about her. You slept for 2 days?—
--yea, it’s strange, I know—
--you’re eating though, right?—
--I just ate half a small bag of Cheese-its. Does that count—
--no it doesn’t. I knew I should’ve stayed. Jinxx please eat something, you need to be strong for Val.—
--I know I’m sorry I just don’t have much of an appetite at the moment—
--just don’t hurt yourself or anything. The last thing you need is to not be eating.—
--alright I’ll eat.—
--thank you—
Our conversation ended with that. She’s right though, I shouldn’t not be eating, my immune system is weak enough…
I spend the rest of the night and most of the morning on my phone or pacing around the room. I don’t eat anything even knowing I should. The doctor’s checked in a few times and a nurse comes in every hour. I fall back asleep around noon.
I go and wake up Ella and tell her what’s going on. She looks at me confused for a moment, then gets up, puts her jacket on and heads to the front of the bus. We’ve stopped at a rest stop for the night since we have a day off from tour. Ella and I head outside to look around. There’s a lake down a hill from the rest stop so we decide to check there first.
We rush down to the lake and start searching. God, where could she be? I just had to tell her that Andy may have found her parents. More importantly, Andy had to go looking for her parents.
“Over here!” I hear Ella call. I run over to where she is and am horrified by the sight in front of me. She had carved the words ‘failure’, ‘worthless’, and ‘hate’ into the skin on her arms. This time, however, there were no cuts along her wrists. Hopefully that means she hadn’t been trying to kill herself.
“She’s still alive, right?” I ask quietly, holding back tears.
“Well she’s still breathing” Ella replies equally as quiet.
Ella pulls out her phone and dials 911 for an ambulance. As she’s talking with the operator, I get a text from Jake asking where Val, Ella and I are.
--We’re down by the lake down the hill from the rest stop. Valerey’s hurt herself again—I text back.
--Shit, dude, I’m gonna wake up Andy, CC, and Ash and we’re gonna come down there—
--Actually, can you wait up there for the ambulance? Me and Ella are gonna try and bring her up—
--will do—
And with that I lift her up and carry her bridal style up the hill. When we get up there we find the ambulance waiting for us. The EMS guys take Valerey from me and put her on a stretcher and push her into the back. I climb in after them. The other five are gonna wake up Jon and head to the hospital.
When we make it there, they rush Valerey back to a room and hook her up to life support. Some of the cuts required stitches. After about an hour the doctor comes in and tells me that she will live, but will be in a coma for a few days. A few minutes after that, Jake, Andy, Ella, CC, Ashley, and Jon come into the room.
“They said she’ll be out for a few days, but will live” I tell them as they enter.
“We’re not going to be able to make it to the last two shows of Warped” Jon says
“I’m just rhythm guitar, they can do a couple shows without me” I say. I don’t want to let the fans down, the guys have to perform.
“You sure?” Jake asks
“Yea, I’ll be fine” I reply
“I’ll stay here with you if you want.” Ella offers
“No, you should be with Jake for the last few shows since you have to go back to Europe after them.” I say and she gives me a hug.
“I’ll check in every night through a text” She whispers to me and then her and the guys leave.
When they leave I sit back in the chair and close my eyes. I can’t believe this. I can’t believe I let this happen, I’m probably the reason it happened. I’m just glad she’s going to be okay. I lean forward and rest my arms on my legs and my face in my hands and start crying. Why does she have to go through this? She’s the sweetest girl ever; why would her parents leave, it just doesn’t make sense…
I wake up with my arms and head rested on the side of her bed. I don’t remember when I fell asleep or even falling asleep. I check my phone to see what time it is. 9 P.M the day after we got here. I slept two entire days. How I managed that, I’m not sure. I usually can’t get more than a few hours of sleep at a time.
I pull my phone back up and check Twitter. Almost all of my mentions are filled with hate. ‘Why did I skip Warped’, ‘You’re so selfish’, things like that. As I’m scrolling through I find one that says “I hope you’re alright and everything’s fine with Valerey. I know you wouldn’t skip Warped for no reason. Ily, Jinxx” It’s nice knowing there are some sane people out there… I reply with “Thanks for understanding. Everything’s fine, I just can’t be on Warped for the remaining shows”
I put my phone down and get up to move to the side of Valerey’s bed. I crouch down and kiss her cheek.
“I love you and I always will” I whisper to her, hoping she can hear me even though she’s in a coma.
My stomach starts growling and I remember that I haven’t eaten in three days. I’ve been here for two and didn’t eat at all the day before this happened. I go into the cafeteria and find a vending machine. I put a dollar into it and punch in the number for the bag of Cheese-its. I go back to the room with Valerey and eat about half the small bag. I don’t really feel up to eating much.
Just as I sit back down I get a text from Ella.
--How’s Val doing? — is the first one from around 8 last night.
--Jinxx you okay? — Another reads about 3 minutes after the first.
--I’m just gonna assume you’re asleep. Please answer when you wake up though— from a few minutes later
--Is Val doing okay? — reads the one I just got.
--yea, she’s fine. Sorry I didn’t reply last night I just woke up an hour ago—
--That’s good to hear about her. You slept for 2 days?—
--yea, it’s strange, I know—
--you’re eating though, right?—
--I just ate half a small bag of Cheese-its. Does that count—
--no it doesn’t. I knew I should’ve stayed. Jinxx please eat something, you need to be strong for Val.—
--I know I’m sorry I just don’t have much of an appetite at the moment—
--just don’t hurt yourself or anything. The last thing you need is to not be eating.—
--alright I’ll eat.—
--thank you—
Our conversation ended with that. She’s right though, I shouldn’t not be eating, my immune system is weak enough…
I spend the rest of the night and most of the morning on my phone or pacing around the room. I don’t eat anything even knowing I should. The doctor’s checked in a few times and a nurse comes in every hour. I fall back asleep around noon.
Yes, I have a instagram,. My name on there is; megaannn__alexissss and your welcome
12/4/14