'Is this really happening? Jess possibly pregnant? She looks so frightened.. Well, if she is then I'm going to be here for her and help her through it' I thought to myself as I saw her starting to shake and cry even more.

"What am I gonna do Melissa? I'm so scared.. I don't want to tell the guys, not yet anyways at least until I find out for sure if I am. And god only knows how cc's going to react if I really am. I just, I don't know what to do.." she trailed off starting to sob as she laid her head in her hands. I sighed sadly and felt my eyes starting to water. I wrapped my arms around her hugging her tightly. This incredible girl has already gone through so much in her life and now she's dealing with stress of possibly being pregnant.

"Jess, please do your best to stay calm, okay? The stress isn't good for you. Look, you're going to get through, okay? I'm going to help you, don't worry, you won't be alone on this. We'll figure something out, I promise" I reassured her as I gently rubbed her back still hugging her.

"Just breathe Jess, everything will be fine" I felt her take a deep breath and exhale slowly. She pulled back and wiped her tears nodding.

"Okay, I really hope so. Thank you Mel, I really appreciate it" she said as she finally calmed down.

"Anything for you Jess. Listen, how about tomorrow morning while we're at a stop, I run to the store and get you a test and whatever else you need?" I asked giving her a small smile. She returned the smile and nodded.

"Okay, thank you so much! I'll give you the money for it" she said hugging me and I hugged her back. We heard the door open and turned to see Jake and Ashley walking in.

"Jess are you okay?" Jake went up to her asking worriedly but she just chuckled slightly so he wouldn't get suspicious. I know she doesn't want to tell the guys for a while, especially Jake or cc.

"Yeah I'm fine just feeling sick that's all" she said to him.

"Ok.. Well we're heading off soon. Why don't you stay on our bus" he said and she nodded standing up.

"I'm going to stay on this bus again" Ashley said to them. I was kind of surprised but made me really happy. He made my heart race and fill with joy. I smiled at him and stood up off the couch.

"Okay, sounds good lets go Jess" Jake said. Jess went up to Ashley giving him a hug whispering something I couldn't hear. I saw him smack her shoulder and smirk at her. Oh god, what are they in on? Oh well, I went up to Jess and gave her a hug before they started to leave.

"Thank you" she whispered to me and pulled away. I smiled at her and watched as she followed Jake off the bus. Jess is going to end up being the sister I never had, I could feel it and that made me happy. I saw Ashley in the corner of my eye look at me then sit on the couch turning the tv on. Planet Terror came on tv and I just decided to sit back down. I started getting into the movie until I realized the couch felt different and actually started to move. I turned to look and saw I ended up sitting on Ashley's lap by accident. I quickly got up and sat at the end of the couch blushing bright red.

"Oh god, I'm so sorry Ashy, I wasn't paying attention and didn't realize I sat on you!" I said hiding my face. God why did I have to be so embarrassing? I was mentally slapping the shit out of myself. 'What the fuck Melissa, look next time you go in reverse! He probably thinks you're a total weirdo now or-' my thoughts were interrupted when I heard him chuckle and felt myself being lift from my corner. I saw it was Ashley holding me bridal style walking back over to his seat on the couch placing me back on his lap and wrapping his arms around my waist.

"Mel, don't worry about it at all, it's no big deal. You were just really into the movie" he said chuckling again.

"Why didn't you say anything though?" I asked him still feeling embarrassed. He just shrugged and smiled at me.

"I didn't mind, I liked it plus like I said, you were really into the movie so I didn't want to be rude and interrupt just to say you were sitting on me. I just thought you didn't care so I left it alone" he said grinning at me. God that smile could make me melt and stop my heart. I ended up blushing, yet again but got really tired. I started to yawn but covered my mouth and turned away as to not be rude or him see how I look when I yawned. You know how when cats yawn they stick their tongue out and curl it while they do? Yeah, I had a bad fucking habit of doing that, it's not like I do it on purpose, it just happens. It's how I've always yawned, which is why my mom always thought I was part cat. I turned back to Ashley who had a raised eyebrow and a slight smile on his face. God he was so gorgeous.

"Oh, sorry, didn't want to be rude and yawn in your face. Or you see it" I muttered the last part under my breath turning back towards the tv but I'm guessing he heard. He grabbed me by my chin and turned me to face him again.

"Why don't you want me to see?" he asked. I ended up blushing and looking down.

"Because I look weird. I yawn like cats do, you know, they stick their tongues out and curl it up. Yeah, I do that, not purposely either. People have made fun of me for it calling me a freak or have said I do it on purpose for attention. But nope, I've actually just been that way since I was a little girl" I said shrugging. I felt him chuckle and looked up to see him smiling warmly at me.

"Those people are beyond fucking stupid, Mel. That sounds adorable, just like you" he said causing me to smile. I leaned against his shoulder and turned started watching the movie again. A few minutes later the guys came in smiling at us and heading towards their bunks except Cam and Matt who saw the movie and sat down next to us. I started to doze off on Ashley again so I got up and started making my way to my bunk. I turned back to the guys letting them know.

"I'm gonna go to bed now guys. It was an awesome night and you did great" I said smiling at them and walking to my bunk to get my clothes.

"Thanks Mel and goodnight" I heard Matt say and one of them clearing their throat whispering something. I was too tired to care what it was or who it was so I walked to the bathroom with my clothes to change. I took the 2 buns out of my hair and tied it into a ponytail. I then washed off my makeup and stripped to my underwear. I slipped into a tank top that was slightly see through, black sleep shorts and my black knee highs. http://www.polyvore.com/untitled_11/set?id=90622255

I sighed tiredly picking up my other clothes from the floor and walked out of the bathroom turning off the light behind me. I crawled up into my bunk seeing Max laying in his usual spot next to the wall. I put my clothes in my duffle and closed the curtain laying under the warm blanket snuggling up to max. I put on When You Can't Sleep At Night again on my ihome and started drifting off to sleep until I heard my curtain open slightly and close again. I thought I had saw a bright light flash over my closed eyelids but I was probably just really tired. I felt the weight of my bunk shift and an arm snake around my waist. The feeling of a warm torso pressed against my back and I felt the touch of a light kiss on my shoulder. I sleepily turned over and nuzzled my face into Ashley's neck, I could feel him smiling. One arm stayed over my waist while he slid the other one under my neck draping it around my back putting his hand on my shoulder. I felt him gently gliding his fingertips along my arm with the hand he had resting on my shoulder that caused me to get goosebumps. I felt the vibration in his chest as he chuckled quietly, even that soothed me about him. He comforted me so much and I've never felt safer being in anyone's embrace. Alex was never this affectionate with me, he just always groped me and tried to force himself on me. Me and Ashley aren't even together and he treats me like a fragile glass rose and as if I'm, his. I kept thinking of when he told his fans earlier about how we weren't together yet and I really wanted to know what he meant about that. Because even though he treated me so gently and lovingly, I still had doubts in my mind and heart that he could ever want to be with someone like me. I always thought The Ashley Purdy was never the relationship type and that's why he always just hooked up with women. 'Why would he love me? He'll probably just eventually get tired of me anyways like everyone else did' I thought to myself as I frowned. Then I heard another small voice in the back of my head. 'He will never love you, Melissa. Look at you, you're disgusting and a freak just like everyone says. He's going to leave you for someone else, someone better. You're going to be alone, forever.' That small voice sounded so evil, like, Alex. I felt myself starting to hyperventilate and someone started lightly shaking my shoulder.

"Mel. Mel!" Ashley yelled in a whisper to me causing my eyelids to fly open. I was sweating slightly and breathing heavily. Ashley wiped my cheek with his thumb, apparently I was crying too.

"Melly are you okay?" he asked me worriedly. I nodded taking a deep breath and slowly started to calm down.

"Yeah, I'm fine Ashy. Just a bad dream, that's all" I gave him a small smile. I pulled me to him and held me tightly.

"You started to hyperventilate, you scared me Mel. I thought something was happening to you. You're not still.." he trailed off glancing down at my arms. He thought I was still cutting but truth be told, I promised myself I wouldn't, for him. I shook my head as he lifted one of them showing the same old lines. He picked up the other one and saw no new marks there either.

"What about your thighs?" he asked me. I shook my head and moved my legs up lifting the bottom of my shorts to show him the same old marks. He gently grazed his fingertips over the scars on my thighs sighing.

"I can't believe he caused you to do this to yourself" he said somewhat mad. I looked up to see his face sadden.

"Mel, I swear on my life, I will never let anything happen to you again. I'm going to always protect you and be there by your side." he said as he gently rubbed my side.

"Ash?" I want to know, I need to know if he has feelings for me or not.

"Yes?" he asked back.

"Earlier, at the meet and greet when you told your fans that asked if we were together, that we weren't yet. What did you mean by that?" I asked him looking straight into his eyes.

"It's not obvious already? Look, Mel, I really like you and I know I probably shouldn't be admitting this just yet but I want to be with you. I don't want to rush you though, which is why I admitted to them not yet. Unless you don't even want to then I feel like an ass for saying that without your permission" he said looking down, he smile slowly started to fade. I gently stroked his cheek with my thumb causing him to look back up at me and smiled at him. I can't believe he actually wants to be with me.

"No, Ashes, I honestly would love to be with you and it means a lot to me that you're being patient and waiting for me. Just, give me a little bit more time, okay?" I asked him and saw his face light up as he nodded frantically hugging me tightly.

"I'll wait for you as long as it takes, Mel. Forever if I have to" he said the last part in a whisper barely loud enough for me to hear. I smiled and nuzzled my face into his neck again and resting my hands on his bare chest. I could feel his heart beat, it was so peaceful. I slowly drifted off to sleep feeling safe in his arms.

---------------------------

I woke up around 9 in the morning to a familiar toned body pressed against me in my bunk. Luckily he wasn't holding on too tight this time so I could slip out without waking him. I moved his arm slowly getting up and checking before making my way out of the bunk. Okay, good, he's still fast asleep. I grabbed my clothes along with my jeffrey campbell boots and headed to the bathroom to get dressed. I quickly got out of my pajamas and put on a pair of dark navy high waisted shorts, my bvb crop top tank, my grey thigh highs, my favorite slipknot studded black and white denim vest, and put on my boots. I took out my ponytail and decided not to do anything with my hair since it was already semi-curly so I just put on my black beanie, did a quick cat eye for my eyes and slipped on a studded bangle for my other wrist since I had on my bracelets on my other one to hide all my scars. I put in my harley quinn plugs and unicorn necklace along with my round circle cat eye sunglasses. http://www.polyvore.com/untitled_10/set?id=90495165

Once I got done getting dressed I turned off the bathroom light and quietly made my way out to the bunks again. Good, all the guys were still passed out so they wouldn't have to question me where I was going. I especially didn't need Ashley tagging along so it's a good thing he's still peacefully sleeping too. I quietly reached into my bunk getting my cat tote bag and wrote a little note for Ashley leaving it in my spot.

Ashley,

Sorry, had to run to the store real quick. I didn't want to wake you up but if I'm not back by the time you wake up then text me if you need anything. I shouldn't be gone long but yeah, I'll be back. You don't have to wait up for me either, feel free to go back to the bvb bus if you want to. I'll see you later on if you do. xoxo

Love,
Melissa

I wrote down my phone number putting the small note in my empty spot then quietly made my way off the bus. I walked over to the bvb bus but in case everyone was still asleep on theirs too I didn't want to take the risk of waking up any of the guys. So I took out my phone opening twitter and sent Jess a message since I still didn't have her number.

Me: Hey, I'm outside of the bus. I didn't want to knock and risk waking any of the guys up. xx

I sent it and about 2 minutes later the door opened up revealing Jess in her pj's looking sick to her stomach again.

"Uh oh, did you throw up already?" I asked her worriedly and she nodded.

"I'm sorry Jessy" I said hugging her.

"It's okay, I just really need to take that test" she said and I nodded. She handed me $40 for the store to get her test. I looked at her confused though because I thought tests were only about 15 dollars to 20 the most.

"It's also for any good junk food and candy you can find and get me" she said and I gave her an understanding look and mouthed ohh giving her a thumbs up.

"Got it, okay then I'll go run and get you what you want" I said to her before she started to make her way back into the bus. Then I remembered some pregnancy test boxes come with either, 1 2 or 3 tests.

"Oh wait, do you want me to get you a box that has 1, 2, or 3 tests?" I asked her and she thought for a minute.

"Two, just to be sure since the first once are usually wrong" she said and I nodded before she closed the door and I started walking down the street. There was a wal-mart just a few blocks down from where the buses were parked so I went there. I went into the isle that had the pregnancy tests and looked at all the different ones. 'Jesus why are there so many of them?!' I thought to myself as I looked them over. I grabbed one that said it was 99% accurate that had 2 in it. I was reading it over when I heard a giggle from the other side of the isle.

"Why is she even looking at tests? I don't see why anyone would even want to go near a freak like that, let alone touch her or fuck her" I heard a girl mumble to her friend and looked over to see them staring at me. Wow, way to be original on your insults, bitch. I saw they were standing in front of the condoms and yeast infection creams and smirked at them.

"What are you smiling at, ugly bitch?" the blonde one spat.

"At least I don't have a yeast infection, unlike you. Which I see you're also looking at condoms, so a slut with yeast? Now I see where they get the meaning for dick cheese. They get it when they fuck you" I said smiling sweetly seeing her friend trying her hardest not to laugh. I turned towards the pharmacy and mumbled the word bitch as I walked away. When I got to the counter a woman who looked in her mid thirties came up and smiled at me.

"Hello there, how can I help you?" she asked me nicely and I smiled at her.

"Umm, do you know if you have anything for nausea that's safe for a baby? My friend is pregnant and she's not doing so well with the vomiting so I just thought I'd give it a shot to see if there was anything she could take?" I asked her and she nodded.

"Yes we do actually. They're chewable nausea tablets that are also safe for pregnant women to take. Now they won't exactly keep her from throwing up, but it'll lighten it and have it occur less" she said leading me over to the isle where she picked out the tablets and handed them to me. I was mostly getting these to bullshit the guys so they thought Jess was just having stomach problems but I also wanted to help her out so she'd vomit less. I thanked the woman and told her I'd be back to buy the test and tablets. I went down the food isles and got Jess a couple candy bars, gummy candy, chips and a sprite to help her stomach. I took everything back to the pharmacy where the woman was waiting with the test and tablets I was getting for Jess. When she saw everything I had she chuckled lightly and started ringing everything up starting with the test and tablets putting them in a bag so no one would see them.

"You must be a good friend if you're getting her that much to eat" she said smiling and I shrugged.

"Well, I'm trying to be. I'm not sure how much she wanted but she made it clear she wanted candy and snacks" I said back to her. She finished ringing me up and I handed her the money. She gave me the little change back and the bag smiling telling me to have a nice day. I smiled back thanked her once again walking out into the breeze. I got a snickers for me and a bunch of different candy for Jess. I got to the buses and messaged Jess letting her know I was here. She told me to go ahead and come inside the bus. I quietly opened the door not sure if anyone else was awake yet and walked inside seeing Jess and Jinxx sitting on the couch. Jinxx looked over and smiled while Jess looked tired but gave a smile too. I walked over and sat down next to her handing her the bag.

"The woman at the pharmacy recommended those nausea tablets to help with your tummy. I got you different candy because I didn't know which one you liked most, along with chips and a sprite to help your stomach" I said smiling at her.

"You got the tests too right?" she asked causing my eyes to widen and take a quick glance at Jinxx.

"He already knows, don't worry" she said to me causing me to sigh in relief and nod.

"Then in that case, yes I did. They're at the bottom of the bag" I told her. I felt my phone go off and took it out seeing a number I didn't recognize. It was a text from Ashley.

Ashley: Hey, I got your note. How much longer are you going to be gone? I'm lonely now :(

I couldn't help but smile widely at the text.

Me: I'm coming back right now, be there in a sec cutie :)

I sent the message and locked my phone putting it back in my pocket as I started to stand back up.

"Was that Ashley?" Jess asked me smirking and I nodded blushing.

"Okay well, I'm gonna go ahead and go back to the burn bright bus. Jessy, if you need me, I wrote down my number on the back of the receipt" I said hugging her.

"Thank you again Mel" she said hugging me back

"And please look out for her for now Jinxxy" I said to him and he smiled nodding.

"Don't worry, I'll have her in my sight the whole time" he said giving me a quick hug.

"Good, I'll be back over with Ashley later" I told them as I waved bye to them and walked off the bus back to ours. I opened the door and saw Ashley sitting on the couch with a small bowl of cereal watching tv. I smiled and went to sit next to him but half way sitting he pulled me into his lap and kissed my cheek.

"How are you going to finish eating if I'm in the way?" I asked him laughing. He shrugged and pouted his lip.

"You could feed me" he said childishly causing me to roll my eyes.

"Fine, but you're sharing" I said to him as I took the bowl from him scooping up a spoon full. I would feed him a spoon full then me. When we finished I got up and went to the kitchen washing the bowl and spoon putting them away. I went and instinctively sat back in Ashley's lap.

"We're going back to the bvb bus later, okay?" I asked turning to look at him and he nodded.

Notes

My sincere apologies to all you devoted readers for taking so long to update :(
Here's a new chapter though!
I'm possibly going to start writing more stories and definitely try to update sooner.
I love you all!<3