Death and the Girl

I found myself back in my dorm room on Sunday night. My ankle was still throbbing a little. Tris had removed the ice pack and smothered it in some kind of balm that stung, but seemed to resolve the swelling. Slumping into my chair, I sighed.

Closing my eyes, I could picture Collette and Hunter. I scrunched up my face and fought to ignore the stab of pain in my chest. I picked up my bag and pulled out my phone. Typical. Collette had phoned me about ten times and messaged me. It was my turn to do the avoiding. Or so I thought because someone knocked my door.

"Junko, it's me. I know you're there," Collette sniffled. "Please talk to me."

I huffed and stood. I opened the door a crack and her tear streaked face greeted me. She looked upset and guilty. So she should. I couldn't bring myself to hate her though. I invited her in and she ghosted past me.

For the first few minutes, we sat in silence. Me, in the chair and her perched on the edge of my bed.

"I'm sorry." She murmured.

"H-how long were you with him?" I asked, ignoring her.

"It's been a couple of months." She replied.

"And Victoria?" I couldn't believe I sympathised with Victoria, but I did.

"She found out the other day." Collette confirmed.

So, when I'd seen Victoria fuming the other morning, she'd evidently discovered Hunter's betrayal. It also explained why Hunter looked so down the other day too.

"Junko, I'm sorry. I asked Liam and he said-"

"So, everyone knew. Everyone but me." I cut her off.

Wow, that stung quite badly. So, I was the last to know. Hunter knew because he was the cheat, Liam knew and Victoria obviously found out the hard way. I wondered if her pain was equal to or more than mine. Like some weird math equation.

"I wanted to tell you." She shrieked, hysteria taking over.

"Why didn't you then?" I snapped, growing flustered.

"Hunter wanted to spare your feelings." She sobbed.

"Wow, thanks. I suppose I should be grateful." I replied, eyes stinging.

Hunter had obviously known I'd liked him. I mean I'd made it obvious the times I'd been around him. I just hadn't out right told him.

"Plus you were with that other guy." Collette snapped, like she thought it excused her behaviour.

"He's a friend. I would have told you if he'd been something more," I whispered. "I would of come to you for advice."

Her face paled and she seemed to realise the implication behind my words. I would have trusted her, but she couldn't return the sentiments.

"So, you still like Hunter?" She said, eyes becoming steely.

"No." I murmured.

Her face relaxed, like she thought I was no longer competition. I wasn't even in with a chance in the first place. The silence stretched on and I shifted in my chair.

"You should go." I said, and she looked torn, but rose to her feet.

There was no fight. She left and I didn't bother to do anything. I didn't stop her and I continued to stare at the carpet. Finally, after fighting it, my eyes started to water. The tears that came were like an out pouring.

Crying helped. I cried because of Collette's betryal. I cried because I had finally gotten over Hunter, but it still burned. Once my sobs had subsided I rubbed my sore eyes. I glanced to the bracelet on my arm and thought of the one person that I was falling for. Should I contact him? No, I didn't want to be seen like this.

*************************

College was a big no-no the next morning. I actually phoned in. Something I hadn't done since my first week here when I'd ended up with food poisoning after a celebratory meal with my Aunt.
I woke at around eleven and decided to type some of my reports up. It gave me something to focus on. After an hour of typing, someone knocked my door. I guessed it was Collette coming to see why I wasn't at lunch.

"Go away, Collette." I called.

"Not Collette, but if you insist." Keith's voice came from the other side.

I moved quickly and opened the door. Keith was on the other side. He smiled when I answered.

"Hungry?" He asked, presenting me with some donuts.

My stomach felt hollow and I shook my head. He frowned and seemed to sense something was off, but said nothing.

"So, can I come in?" He grinned.

"Yeah, I guess so." I moved aside.

The door shut with a click and he sat down on the bed, taking in my room. I sat in my chair and faced him.

"Just come to update you," He said. "The lights in the forest were fae. Markers have been put around the area so even the most spiritual human can't see them."

"Awesome, that's good." I smiled at last.

"Onto the next mission now. There's a college about an hour away from here that wants to demolish the old building next to it. Been a lot of issues though. Construction work has been abandonned till it gets sorted."

I guessed we'd be heading there next. I nodded and prepared myself for this.

"So, we're going on Saturday?" I asked.

"Yep, we are." He replied.

A sense of not wanting to be alone hit me and I shuffled nervously. I was aware that I was wearing my scruffy jeans and an oversized jumper, but I wanted to be anywhere but here.

C-can I come back with you?" I asked.

"Yeah, I mean, I have a mission to go to, but Tris won't mind you hanging out." Keith replied.

Leaving the human world behind was like escaping my problems. Keith said goodbye and I was left in the foyer. Tris was nowhere in sight. Was it a bad idea to do what I was doing? It was the worst idea. I walked down the hallway and up a flight of stairs.

When I got to Chris's office I debated on whether or not I should leave. I raised my hand to knock and the door opened. A guy with dark hair and a beard stood in front of me. His eyes were brown too, but lacked warmth. He stared at me like I was a speck of grit.

"I-i'm here to see Chris." I murmured.

"And what business would a human have with a legion leader?" The guy snapped.

What to say? I opened my mouth and felt the burn in my cheeks. This guy was my reality check. Why was I here again? I wasn't good enough for Chris. This guy knew it. In fact the whole world probably knew it.

"How'd you get here, anyways?" The guy demanded, tone brisk.

"Junko?" Chris appeared behind the guy, approaching me.

The bearded guy turned his attention to Chris, eyes demanding an explanation. I nodded and looked at Chris. His lips tilted slightly, but he became stern when faced with beard-guy's glare.

"Miss Misaki works for me." He said, and Beard-Guy looked shocked for a whole second, before looking agitated.

"I see. And what does she do?" Beard-guy asked.

"She is what Evangeline is to you, Eric." Chris sounded angry, but he hid it quite well.

Beard-Guy, or Eric, nodded and seemed to accept this. He still regarded me with distaste, but there was a look in those eyes that made me incredibly scared. Eric walked away, glancing back at me every so often.

"Who is Evangeline?" I asked. First stupid question of the day.

"It doesn't matter," He replied, still sounding like he wanted to murder someone. I backed away and he seemed to sense I was uneasy. "Why don't you come in."

It wasn't a request. I trailed after him. He was in his suit again. I smiled when I saw the snowglobe on the desk. I also recalled the almost-kiss. Chris sat down on the couch and motioned for me to join him. I hesitated, not wanting to seem too forward. Just because we'd shared a moment didn't mean we were suddenly a couple. I sat down, making sure I was far enough away.

"You look poorly." Chris stated. Wow, blunt.

"Y-yeah, Collette and I spoke." I replied.

"And she's sorry?" He asked.

"Not really. I think we're in a fight," I murmured. "Kinda like a couple of children, really."

I did register that my problems were childish. I was so young and nothing more than a kid to Chris. I kept my eyes lowered onto my hands. They were trembling.

"We should dicuss what happened last night." His tone changed, and I winced.

Here it comes. The second rejection in as many hours. Hunter's was less direct, but at least this time I get to feel the full brunt of it. If I could have lowered my head more then I would have. My eyes stung again and humiliation welled up inside my small body.

The couch shifted and I felt his cold hand grip my chin. Stubbornly, I refused to raise my head. If I couldn't see it then I could pretend and salvage some feelings at least.

"You're not going to look at me." He said, and I heard the amusement.

I allowed my face to be lifted. We were inches apart and I could see the crimson in his eyes. I could see the way the light glinted off his lip piercings.

"This time we won't be interrupted." He murmured.

I didn't have much chance to register the meaning in those words because his lips were on mine, claiming me. The humiliation was pushed aside as a wave of confusion swept over me. Chris seemed to sense that I wasn't responding. I was so nervous. The tremble in my hands had travelled up my arms.

The hand that had been gripping my chin grasped one of my hands and lifted it to drape around his shoulers. My other hand followed suit and I finally snapped out of my daze to respond tentatively. The kiss deepened and I pressed my hands against his chest when I felt his tongue brush my lower lip. I pushed and we came apart.

My eyes were wide and he chuckled, leaning forward and kissing my again, softly this time, pulling apart to press our foreheads together.

"W-what was that?" I panicked then.

Where was the rejection? It hadn't happened and it left me reeling. I demanded an explanation and yet I don't think my mind could processed one.

"We kissed." Chris said, like we were discussing the weather.

Casual. The casualness of it threw me and I pulled back fully. In my world, people would kiss casually all the time. Sometimes, relationships were things that benefited people in one way only. I wasn't completely naive. Was I going to enter into that kind of relationship?

"I-i can't kiss you like that again." I whispered.

"You didn't like it?" Chris said, sounding terse.

I glanced up at him and let out a shaky breath, followed by a few tears. No, not now. Don't cry now, stupid. The couch shifted again and I felt his hand coil into my hair, tilting my face so we could look at each other. His eyes had shifted in emotion and there was concern there. His fingers traced through my hair, massaging my head.

"You want us to be togther." He murmured, and I looked at him finally, nodding. He smiled then.

"I'm crap though." I mumbled.

"No, you're not," He replied, leaning down, brushing our lips together. "You're beautiful."

"No, I look like like a troll." I laughed.

"Junko, take the compliment for once, will you." He chuckled.

This was probably a bad idea. There were a myriad of reasons why this would probably go bad, but I was too thick-headed to think of them.

"We do need to establish some rules though," Chris said. Of course we did. "No one outside of this unit must know and this will progress slowly."

I nodded and met his eyes then.

"So, you're my-" I had no idea.

"I'm not your boyfriend. That's absurd. Lover would be accurate." He replied.

"Lover sounds too formal. Boyfriend, please?" I asked, and he grinned.

"Aren't you a little old to be calling anyone a boyfriend? I thought that was reserved for children." Chris said.

"Well, you're the first person I've called boyfriend." I mumbled.

Someone tapped at the door and I pulled back. Chris kept his hand on mine and Tris entered, smiling when she saw me. If she saw our hands, she said nothing, only grinned wider.
I couldn't help but feel something bad was going to happen, but for now I wanted to live in bliss and pretend everything was all right.

Notes