Burnout.

I tell him my address
Like the idiot I am.

Obviously, I know how this story ends. I’ve lived this story, I have had this experience and I know how this is going to end. And Ill tell you right fucking now. Even when you think it’s in my favor, I will never end up Ashley. This isn’t a fucking fairy tale, The plain girl’s don't get the fucking hot ass guys, they don’t really get anything in the end.

So proceed in reading this story with this knowledge with the way you would proceed through life.

Don’t fucking get attached like I did.

However, an hour later he’s walking through the front door

I'm so nervous I almost wish Andy was here, but I have to be brave. At this point in my life I NEED romance. I can’t keep tuning to my fucking non stereotypical gay best friend for love. That's pathetic I mean come on.

I remember exactly what the first couple moments were like, It was almost like I was seeing this man in a whole new light. He was awkward and timid. His hands curled up into his leather jacket as he sat on my bed in silence. All of a sudden I felt awkward of all the posters on my walls, I felt awkward about the stuffed animals maybe across my pillows, I felt awkward about the cd playing in my stereo.

He took of his shoes,
No socks.

“Have any socks I could wear dude?” He asks.

I reach into my dresser, “Sure” I say throwing him a pair.

We start laughing so hard that I feel like my chest is going to collapse.

I fall onto my bed.

We talk about music for hours, He tries to teach me guitar, But I can't learn because I’m too busy staring at him. I can feel his big strong hands on mine and they guide me to the stings. How it hand is accidentally on my waist, and we both know that it isn't an accident.

“You suck at guitar, Maple” He says with a giant smile on his face.

“Yeah, I might be” I say flipping my hair across my shoulder “But I can bet your ass in thumb wrestling”.

His hand links with mine as we battle out with our thumbs, I win three times in a fuckng row.

I
AM
THE
FUCKING
CHAMPION.

But then we lay down and he beats me at arm wrestling, and soon laying down turns into star gazing into eachothers eyes. Our legs become interlocked and he is just holding me in his arms for a while. While he is holding me, I’m so scared I cant fucking breath. His face is so close to mine, my head starts screaming “WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO KISS ME”. It feels like an eternity looking at his angel face.

When he finally does kiss me, I feel so many things at once.

Scared- Because he is in a relationship, because he is so much older than me, because he is beautiful.

Exhilarated - Because he is in a relationship, because he is so much older than me, because he is beautiful.

Completely In Love - Because he is in a relationship, because he is so much older than me, because he is beautiful.

When he leaves, I taste alcohol on my lips, and permanent traces from where his hands have touched me.

Notes

I'm sorry this story is such shit,

I'm so completely in love with real life 'Andy' (My best friend Dylan),
That I cant even think right now.

(Too bad we will never be together :/)

I'm heartbroken.