I Need You Here Tonight

21st January

At last my January exams were over. Exams lasted a period of three weeks in January and were done by department. The science block always went first, but that just meant ours were all out of the way.

The literature and Arts departments would be next and Shay was already terrified. Oli didn't seem too bothered. For me and so many others it was all over till May.

"Time to celebrate." Bret smiled, and he hugged me as we left the exam hall for the final time that week.

"I think I'm going out for pizza." I grinned back.

"Oh, me too. Did Ben invite you?" He pulled back. I nodded.

It felt strange to be hanging out with a different group of people and I was a little nervous until I saw Kellin and Vic. I knew Vic studied NeuroScience so it was a relief to see him.

Amongst the group was Ben. He looked happy, but a little bedraggled. Studying really took it out of him. Jenna was here too. She looked radiant despite all the work she had put in. Robbie and Chad were also here.

Kellin rushed over and hugged me. He spun me around and set me back on the floor. Vic walked over and smiled.

"Hey Kota, glad that's over." He chuckled.

"Yeah, same here. How'd you think it went?" I asked, desperately hoping for some support. Exams always unnerved me.

"It went all right. I was so nervous though." Vic replied.

"Nah, you did awesome and aced it." Kellin smiled, hugging his boyfriend.

His belief was so sweet and I suddenly remembered a promise I made. We walked to the underground station and went to Pizza Hut. Thankfully, Jenna had booked a table.

"We couldn't just turn up." Jenna was saying to Ben.

"Relax, I had it all covered." He ruffled her blonde hair, and she punched him.

We sat down at the table and drinks were soon ordered. I sat with Kellin on one side and Bret on the other. He was chatting to Chad though.

I pulled out my phone and quickly typed out a text to Shay to tell her that I had finished the exams and she replied back promptly, wanting to celebrate too.

I paused before texting Jake. I didn't want him to get in trouble with Ella, but he'd probably be at work so it would be all right now.

Hey, just finished my last exam :)

I pocketed my phone and joined in the conversation. Now exams were over till May, people seemed to be focusing on the upcoming Summer Holidays.

"Alex said something about his parents beach house to us." Vic said, and he looked at me.

"I think you and Jake are invited too. Ashley and Shay are going." Kellin smiled. He winked at me and I shook my head.

"He has a girlfriend." I informed Kellin.

"Yeah, but she won't be there, will she?" Ben grinned.

"Come on, that's not fair. I'll invite Ella." I said, with some finality.

Vic glowered at Kellin, but he simply grinned. I guessed he and Shay were playing matchmaker and hoping to get Jake and I alone for us to admit to feelings. Jake obviously hadn't got any feelings for me so the situation would be so awkward. My phone buzzed and I peeked down to take a look.

Congrats, geek. Wanna meet tomorrow. We can watch films together ;) x

"He always puts a winky face and a kiss." Kellin smirked, reading over my shoulder.

"Yeah, and?" I shrugged.

"Don't be dense, Kota." He grinned, clearly enjoying this.

The waitress appeared and we ordered food. I always forgot how big the pizzas were here and couldn't finish mine. I ended up giving it to Kellin. He ate his own and the rest of mine, much to the amazement of everyone else.

"You're like a hoover." Vic chuckled.

"A really sexy hoover." Kellin laughed.

Ben started laughing and Jenna nearly choked on her drink. Bret and Chad had stopped eating to stare at Kellin. Robbie laughed too and then someone suggested ice cream, to which Kellin was overjoyed to hear.

After we had eaten we paid and went back to the dorm. Shay was waiting for me on arrival along with Oli and Hannah. She pulled me into a hug and handed me a card.

"Congratulations, gorgeous." She beamed.

I opened the card and laughed. They had all signed it. I recognised Shay's curly handwriting, Oli's neat writing and Hannah's slightly messy writing. Ashley had signed it too.


************

Saturday morning I rang my parents to tell them I had finished my first lot of exams. I spent time talking to Mum, then Dad and finally Holly. She wanted to come and see me, but faltered when I told her I had plans.

"Seeing the boyfriend?" She giggled.

"No, Hols." I stated, but she giggled again.

I sat the phone back on the strand once I'd finished and looked at my clock. I was late. I had gotten up late this morning and spent a lot of time chatting to my parents.

I got up and dressed quickly, rushing down the hall and racing through the lounge. I got to the steps just in time. Jake was already there and he glanced round when he saw me.

"You kept me waiting a whole five minutes." He laughed, reaching out and hugging me.

It felt great to be able to hug him without fear of upsetting Ella, but she was always at the back of my mind. I pulled back at the thought of angering her.

"I'm sure your ego could handle it." I smirked.

"Can't believe you think I have an ego." He chuckled.

We walked up the steps and into the dorms. Alex and Tay were watching tv and their eyes watched us walk by and I saw them share a secret grin.

I opened the door to my room. Should we really be in here together?

"So, where's Ella today?" I asked, trying to keep my tone light.

"She's out with her friend, Megan today." He sat on the bed.

Had he told her that he was meeting me? Or had he simply lied to her? It seemed so wrong to just lie to her. She didn't deserve it, but then again Jake had a right a right to see his friends, regardless of gender.

"So, she thinks you're with Ashley?" I murmured.

I glanced at him to find he was grinning, coyly as though it was all very funny. Jake was very stubborn and he clearly liked Ella so why not just get rid of me. What was the point if she hated me?

"She can't tell me who to hang out with." He replied.

"Yeah, but the two of you shouldn't have secrets when you're in love." I must have sounded like a little girl, who had spent far too much time absorbed in Disney films.

"Woah there, we are not in love. She gets to tell all her friends that she has a boyfriend and I get laid. Works both ways." He laughed when I scrunched up my face in disgust.

"That's awful." I snapped.

"Not everyone lives in a fantasy land, Kota." He smirked.

I glowered at him. I didn't live in a fantasy land. What was wrong with wanting to believe love was real? Nothing from my point of view.

"I don't live in a fantasy land. I just like the idea of love." I mumbled.

"Yeah, so do I. Just not with Ella." He rolled his eyes.

I decided to be purposefully cruel and put on a girly film. I laughed when he groaned in annoyance. I sat on the chair again and he looked at me.

"So, when did you realise you hated being close to me?" He asked, narrowing his eyes at me.

I blanched, not expecting the question at all. I still hugged him, but if he held my hand I'd find an excuse to escape or not hold hands. I wouldn't sit next to him like I used to. I decided to tell a half truth and see how he'd take it.

"I don't go around kissing and touching random guys. I do things for keeps." I whsipered.

"So do I, but with you." He murmured.

Jake's response shocked me and I allowed myself to feel somewhat flattered by the comment, but I still didn't want to get too close to him.

"And Ella." I retorted.

"At this point she really doesn't matter." He replied.

My hands balled into fists on my lap and I fought with myself. What would happen if I got closer? Obviously he won't kiss me again. So it may be safe. I got up and sat on the bed, bringing my legs up.

I rested my head on the pillow, propped against my headboard and I was aware of him pulling me closer. When we hugged like this it made me want to never leave. It made that strange feeling in my body erupt. It was euphoric.

"See I don't bite," Jake's breath fanned my ear, making me shiver. "Unless you want me to."

It was exactly like a snake toying with it's food. His breath sent ripples down my spine and I forced myself to ignore him, but I could sense how close he was to me. Jerk.

"You have a girlfriend." I reminded him in the most monotone voice I could muster.

"You're so dense." He smirked.

He was one to talk about denseness. I decided to play him at his own game. If he wanted to call me dense then I'd do the same.

"You're one to talk about being dense. You can't even see what's right in front of you." I replied. This seemed to attract his attention as he shifted onto his side to look at me.

"I can see what's right in front of me and she's trying to ignore me." He nipped my earlobe, making me squirm sideways.

I angled my head to tell him to go away, but he was closer than I thought. Our noses were touching. Oh god, this seriously couldn't be happening. This was such a bad idea.

"I will not help you cheat." I snapped.

"Oh my god, I am not cheating. She's not my girlfriend," He sat up, narrowing his eyes at me. "I never said she was my girlfriend on New Years. Have you ever heard me say that?"

I paused for a moment. He had never actually said that. On New Years Eve he asked me if I liked her and that was it. They had kissed, but they seemed to fight more often than anything and it seemed more like a friends with benefits relationship. Oh gross.

"Why did she come to the cafe then?" I sat up too, glaring at him.

"Because she gets jealous," Jake snapped. "She thinks we're dating."

We? As in me and him? I lowered my head and sniffled. Yeah, I wish. In that case, you and me both, Ella. At least she gets to say he's her boyfriend and they kiss. It's a legitimate thing. The difference between Ella and I is that she's confident. She obviously told Jake she liked him. Why date her then?

"If you don't like her then why date her?" I sounded bitter, probably was after months of being in love with someone.

"Because the person I really like is dense." He was looking right at me.

I frowned. No way would he be telling me that. I stared at him, trying to piece together the information. He groaned and rolled his eyes. I felt the bed shift as he lay next to me again.

"Look at me," He snapped. I did as I was told, staring into those fathomless brown eyes. "I remember."

What? My mind went blank and I stared at him cluelessly. He remembered what exactly? I had no idea what to say to that.

"I got drunk, came here, saw you and you told me...." He trailed off, as though awaiting my response.

It all came back to me. The night I had told him I loved him and he was paraletic. I knew he wouldn't remember and yet he did. Or was he lying? Had Ash told him?

"But you were drunk. You couldn't possibly remember." I struggled to grasp this concept.

"I wasn't that drunk. I don't remember how I ended up at the dorms, but I remembered you telling me you loved me then I threw up." Jake pulled a face and laughed.

Moment of truth time. Did he feel the same way? Wait a minute, he had said the person he liked was dense. He did like me back. I reeled back slightly, nearly falling off the bed.

Jake's hand wrapped my waist, pulling me back and pressing me closer.

"Saved your life." He smirked.

"You did not save my life. I fall out of bed all the time." I retorted. Ok, that was a stupid thing to say. Revealing that I was absurdly clumsy would not work in my favour.

Before I could continue my witty comeback his lips claimed mine. The kiss at the fairground had been very brief compared to this. It felt like I was floating and I whimpered when our lips moved together. I was still quite tentative about all this.

My hands were at my sides, clutching the sheets. I could feel the nerves pooling in my tummy. He nipped my lower lip and pulled back.

"You're so nervous." He mused.

"I've never actually kissed anyone." I confessed.

"At the fairground. That was your first kiss, right?"

I nodded. My eyes lowered and then flicked back to his eyes. Jake was watching me and I smiled.

"Like I said. I don't just go around doing this stuff." I mumbled. "So, do we, like, go on a date?"

"We've been on quite a few dates, actually." Jake chuckled.

"O-oh, right. I just don't really know how this stuff works."

"We're at the boyfriend-girlfriend stage." He laughed.

We were boyfriend and girlfriend. I must have looked shocked because he shrugged.

"You won't be a jerk to me, right?" I asked.

"No more than usual," He grinned. "I won't treat you badly if that's what you're worried about."

There were still a few issues to work out, but I guessed we'd work through them in time. I angled my head and confirmed it. Jake glanced at me.

"You sound like you don't believe me." He leaned closer.

"No, I do. I just don't want to get hurt." I replied.

"Kota, I'm sorry for putting you through so much, but I am being honest here." He murmured.

I nodded and we stayed together for the evening. Would this work? A part of me was a little dubious about the whole thing, but I guessed it was because I'd never been in a relationship.
I allowed myself to relax and feel happy for once.

Notes