Sons of Night

Andy’s POV
I stood there alone in the secret room for a while wanting to punch myself in the face. I had done the exact thing that I had told myself not to do when I first saw her. The night that I found her I had told myself not to develop feelings for her. That failed on the first night when she let me hold her closely, the first time I’d had physical contact with a girl in years. Then I told myself not to act on those feelings any more than I had. I knew that with my personality if I did anything to bring us closer to each other I’d end up ripping my own hopelessly romantic heart out. I knew she had no feelings for me. She probably thought I was just some dirty weirdo living in the woods with a group of crazy friends.
The first night in the cabin I almost acted on it. Before Ashley came in and ruin everything I had been about to kiss her. Part of me had been grateful at the time, but the other part just wanted to beat the shit out of him. That’s why I slept on the couch that night. I had felt a physical pain in my chest when I had found her, curled up and bleeding in the corner of my room. She had been so afraid that I was going to hurt her, I loathed Ashley for that. When I started to hate my best friend was when I knew that I’d fallen too hard and needed to take a step back, so I slept on the couch. I didn’t let myself get in bed with her, even though my entire soul ached for me to. I wanted so badly to feel her head on my chest again, but I refrained to keep from getting pulled in deeper.
Then of course after all that effort to keep myself distanced I had to go and mess it up for us both. I had almost gotten to the point where I could just shut off my feelings and send her away because that was what needed to be done. At the very last second I blew it. The last fraction of time that I knew I’d have alone with her and I got weak and did that. Hurt her and myself. I knew I hurt her because I heard her tiny choked sob on the way out. She was probably upset that some creep had ruined the dreams of her first kiss. I knew I hurt myself because as I watched her go I felt a throb in my chest and my throat achingly tightened. I had to swallow the feelings, I had to put back up the cold walls that her gentle touch had managed to knock down. I braced myself, recovered the entrance to the room and went downstairs.

Mayden’s POV
When I was coming down the stairs I was struggling to contain and choke back cries. I wanted to cry because Andy was beautiful and I was confused. He kissed me, yes. I enjoyed it, yes. Why? Why had I enjoyed it? Better yet, why did he kiss me? Was it the same reason he beat up his friend? The same reason he gave me the knife? Did he kiss me for the same reason that he came into check on my freezing body? What about when he’d asked me if he could hold me? I couldn’t understand why he’d done any of the things that he’d done for me or to me. He had no motivation, I was nothing to him. Unfortunately he was not nothing to me. Finally having someone outside my family that was willing to treat me like a person was odd to me. I loved the attention that he gave me. The careful words, the way he treated me like I was a strange and fragile thing that he wanted to be near, but didn’t want to break. It made me feel delicate, unique, and most of all important.
That is why I struggled to maintain my emotions on the way down the stairs. I wanted to be treated the way that Andy treated me. Like a fine porcelain doll.Luckily I managed to contain myself by the time I got to the bottom of the stairs. Everyone was getting ready. Several backpacks laid by the door stuffed to the brim with supplies. Jake was checking them over when I came in.
“Hey here’s your clothes, you can put them on in the bathroom real quick, we washed them for you,” He said looking up from his work to hand me my folded clothes that were rested upon a bag so not to be forgotten. I took them and made my way to the bathroom. As I went I saw Ash leaving the kitchen with cans of food and Jinxx on the couch with CC trying to talk to him. CC looked even worse than I remembered him. His head hung low and the veins stuck out on his pale and bony hands. His lips were chapped and he appeared even thinner than the night before. Everyone in this house was thin, but healthfully so. CC looked like a desperate case. His cheeks hollowed, and his eyes sunk in. Those eyes looked dead, blank and glazed over, they barely focused on anything. At least the night before he’d been smiling. Now he looked like he was waiting for death. Jinxx was trying to get him to focus and drink some thin broth but CC seemed unable, or perhaps unwilling to eat. I was glad to see that every once in a while a spoonful went in. I went in the bathroom and changed my clothes.
When I came out of the bathroom Andy was there standing by the door with a pack on his back and so was everyone else. I laid the clothes on the stairs as directed by Ash, they’d take care of them when they got back, but my focus was on Andy. Andy’s eye where almost as dead as CC’s, his face was entirely stoney and completely emotionless. When our eyes met there wasn’t a glint of anything. It was like he didn’t even recognize me, he didn’t smile, his eyes didn’t register a thing. It was like I was just a person he’d passed on the street another face that held no meaning. We held eye contact for a few seconds and he didn’t waver. I broke away because it was starting to scare me.
“And this one is for you Mayden,” Jinxx said handing me the a second smallest bag as well as a coat and other cold weather clothes. I put everything on and it didn’t take me long to realize that I was once again wearing Andy’s old clothes. I took the pack and lugged it up onto my shoulder. I could feel things clanking around inside, I think I was carrying food mostly.
“Everyone ready?” Andy asked, his voice sounded how his face looked, pretty much dead. Like he was only speaking because it was his duty to. He got a few odd looks from the guys but mostly everyone just made sounds of confirmation. With that we pushed out the door and into the snow. Everyone walked in a single straight line out the door, I knew it was going to be a rough trek back and I think everyone else did too. I was third to last in the line with Ash in front of me and Andy leading the whole group. CC was behind me in line and Jake was behind him. As we left I heard the sound of clanking metal and I looked back to see Jake putting a padlock on the front door of the cabin.
I think that CC was behind me because he was the weakest by far. I think that Jake was behind CC to make sure that we didn’t leave him behind. We’d barely walked out of the immediate area around cabin when I heard CC panting for breath behind me. I turned around to make sure he was surviving and his head was down and he was clutching his backpack, but he kept walking. We were walking up a steep climb that was rocky and slippery. The same one Andy and I had climbed down to get to the cabin. As soon as we slid between the two tight rocks you couldn’t see any part of their camp. It was another ingenious move on their part. Anyone coming from my town wouldn’t be able to see the camp at all other than smoke without squeezing between the rocks. It was like these guys had thought of everything.
We trudged through the woods for a long time. For a while we followed the nearly covered tracks that Andy and I had made, then we verged in a different direction so that we were walking parallel to the hill rather than straight up it. I guessed that Andy had done that for CC’s sake. We were moving fast and the wet snow was zapping the energy out of me. My thighs burned with every step and my calves ached for me to stop, but I kept going. I was determined not to be the one that made the whole group stop because I was out of shape. I didn’t have to wait long however because a few moments after I started to ware out I heard Jake call from behind.
“Hold on guys, wait a minute!” He yelled. The whole line turned around to see that CC was on his hands and knees gasping for breath. Jake ran up behind CC and started to rub his back.
“I’ll go back to the cabin, I don’t want to slow you guys down. You can get her home and I’ll wait here until you come back, I’ll be fine I swear,” CC said between gasps.
“No way dude we’re not leaving you all alone, not when you’re this sick,” Ash said.
“I don’t know if I can make it,” CC said looking up. That’s when I realized that no one had told CC how sick he was. No one told him that we were not just taking me home but trying to find him a doctor. Jake had told Andy that he was afraid that CC only had a few days left on earth, Jake hadn’t told CC that though. Ignorance is bliss I guess. CC would have been terrified if he knew that Jake thought he was dying.
“It gets easier once we get up this hill, you can make it man, we’re almost there,” Andy called from up front. CC started shakily trying to get up and Jake pulled up on his arms to help. I felt so bad for him, he was so sick and too innocent minded to realize just how bad he was.
“Do you want me to take your bag for you?” The words were out of my mouth before I had time to think about them. CC had the smallest pack anyway by far, they probably could have easily fit what he was carrying into the other bags if it was divided among them. I realized that they probably gave him that back to make him feel like he was doing something to help out. I had probably hurt his pride by offering to help him.
“No, I got it,” He said shouldering the bag. He was finally beginning to catch his breath.
“Are we ready to keep going?” Andy said from way up ahead, everyone said yes and so we continued. We walked on the side of the hill for a while before we turned and went straight up again. The snow was deep, fluffy and slightly wet because it was melting in the now setting sun. I was nearly thigh deep in the slippery stuff and essentially climbing instead of walking. All I could focus on was my spinning head and putting one foot in front of the other. At some points I even had to dig into the snow with my hands for extra footing so I wouldn’t slide back down.
Finally we came to a steep rock face that was just about a foot and a half over my head. All the boys in front of me scrambled up it with agile ease. It seemed impossible for me. I took off my gloves so I could grip the cold rock better and I tried to place my boots where I’d seen Ashley place his. I managed to push myself up until my hands were just about to the top of the ledge. Then Ash, who a had been watching me struggle from the beginning offered me his hand. I took it gratefully and to my surprise he pulled me right from my perch on the wall and straight up to the top with ease. I grabbed onto his arm with both my hands as my legs pushed off the cliff to give me a bit of extra balance. In a second he placed me down next to him at the top.
“Thanks,” I said. He nodded and then reached down and pulled up CC. Jake hauled himself up too and we were off again. Up here it wasn’t as steep, there were more trees and not as much snow on the ground. It was miles easier to walk and it started to feel more like home. In fact I recognized the woods, they seemed like I’d been in them before. I could here Jinxx and Andy talking at the front of the line but I couldn’t understand them. They said a few words and then they stopped and turned around to wait for the rest of us. We all gathered in a circle breathing heavily.
“We’re almost to the place that we’re going to sleep for the night, it’s actually where I met Mayden,” Andy said, the first time he’d acknowledged me while after we kissed. He pointed off into the woods and in the golden glow of the setting sun I saw the small cave that I’d curled up in the night that I got lost. As I thought about it, the cave was probably big enough to sleep in but we’d be all really close together. We hiked over to the cave. There was still a charred outline of where he’d made his fire and I cringed as I remembered that I let him hold me that night.
“Looks like we’re all gonna be really cozy with each other tonight,” Ash said looking at the somewhat small space.
“Yep. CC get in there and rest. Jake, Jinxx, Ash, set up some things to make it a bit more comfortable here. I’m going to go get some wood for the fire, I’ll be back soon so we can have dinner,” Andy ordered. I got the sense that he purposefully left me out.
“What’s up between you and him,” Jake said quietly once Andy had left. The rest of the group didn’t here.
“What do you mean?” I asked, playing dumb.
“Well he’s been acting like you’re not here since we left you guys alone,” Jake said. I tried to work out if I should tell him or not. I watched Ash and Jinxx spreading blankets on the floor of the cave and CC curled up on them with his head on a pillow and his eyes closed.
“Promise you won’t tell anyone, or mention it to Andy?” I asked Jake.
“Yeah, what happened?” Jake asked his face concerned.
“When Jinxx left us Andy kissed me but I pushed him off and now I think he’s mad at me,” I said quickly like I was confessing to a crime.
“He didn’t hurt you did he?” Jake said.
“No he didn’t, but I think I’m gonna go talk to him,” I said. I didn’t know why I wanted to try to make amends with Andy but I did. As far as I could tell I hadn’t done anything wrong. I marched off in the direction that Andy had gone. I found him not far away pulling branches from a dead tree that was still standing. I heard the dull snap of him pulling off branches, he hadn’t seen me yet.
“Andy,” I called. He looked up in surprise but then his face stoned when he saw me.
“What are you doing?” He growled.
“I’m here to figure out why you’ve been ignoring me all day,”
“Look, I don’t need this shit from you. Why don’t you make yourself useful and take these back to camp,” He snapped shoving a pile of sticks into my arms. His harshness hurt.
“Why are you being such a jerk? What did I do to you?” I said the frustration clear in my voice.
“Go away,”
“Not until you give me a real reason why you’re being like this,” I said stubbornly. I would not be moved, I would find out what I did. I jumped back when he whipped a hatchet off his belt.
“I said go away,” he growled before taking the hatchet and whacking away at a thicker branch.
“Are you mad at me because I pushed you away and didn’t let you have sex with me?” I snapped. He froze mid swing and then lodged the blade in the tree.
“No. I’m not mad at you. It’s not even your fault. I shouldn’t have kissed you, I shouldn’t have even held you. I should have just sent you home the morning after I found you and had nothing to do with you beyond that,” He sighed running his hand through his hair.
“Then why didn’t you send me home?” I asked. I saw his emotions again. His blue eyes softened as he looked at me, but he looked pained.
“Because you let me come close to you and that’s what I’ve been craving for years, and I liked it too much. I let myself start to feel for you, and I acted on it when I shouldn’t have and now you’re going away. I’m not going to let anyone close to me again because I let myself with you and now it hurts like hell,” He moaned, his voice ached with loneliness. I could hear the hurt in his voice.
My body moved without me giving it permission. I dropped the wood in my hands, grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him closer to me while getting on my toes. I brought my lips to his and kissed him again. I was surprised that he kissed back and then pushed away.
“No, no, stop,” He said forcing me away. He had tears on his cheeks and he was looking at me with a look of anguish.
“Why would you do that to me? I just told you how much I’m hurting because of that,” he said his voice was high with pain.
“Because I like you too,” I said.
“What does it matter? You’re leaving, I’m coming back here we’re never seeing each other again. You just made it harder for both of us. This is why I wanted you to leave me alone, it hurts. Just take the goddamn sticks back to camp and leave me alone!” He yelled.

Notes

Not much happening in this chapter but interesting stuff is coming. Leave me a comment and let me know what you think of the story so far.