Within Dreams


I was dreading dinner time and unfortunately when you dread something, time always goes quicker. Mum called everyone to the table and we all sat down. The atmosphere was tense and I glanced round nervously.

Dad was sat opposite Mum. He was the only one putting roast potatoes on his plate. He was doing so with a grim look on his face though. I peeked across at Daniel. He was talking to Jenny. She seemed a little nervous too and smiled at me when I caught her eye. Daniel did so as well.

My gaze went to the seat next to me. Jinxx looked indifferent, almost calm. I wished I felt that way though. I felt something squeeze my hand and I glanced down, noticing he was holding my hand under the table.

I looked at him again and he smiled. The food was passed around and everyone began eating. No one spoke at first, thank goodness for that. Dad drained his glass of juice. He had not touched alcohol in years due to a heart complaint.

“So how’s university going?” He smiled at me and then at Daniel.

“Great, Dad. It’s my last year. I should be in with a chance of getting a job as a surgeon,” Daniel smiled. He beamed at me.

“Oh, yeah, really good. My lecturers say that I’m passing all my classes and I’ll be doing work placements soon.” I replied.

Dad looked thrilled. He nudged Mum, saying that it was brilliant. She seemed disinterested. I was holding my breath, waiting for twenty-one questions to begin.

“So Jenny, you’re going to be a lawyer, I hear?” Dad continued.

“Oh, well I’m in my second year. I hope so. My Dad’s a lawyer too.” Jenny’s eyes lit up. She was obviously very shy, much like me.

Dad glanced down the table and I knew what was coming. This would be interesting.

“And Jeremy, what is it you do?” Dad asked, grinning.

“I work actually,” He replied.

Mum looked stunned. Perhaps she thought someone with long hair and tattoos wouldn’t be able to function as a normal member of society. Dad ignored her confused face and nodded.

“I’m a tattoo artist.” Jinxx smirked, clearly enjoying my Mum’s look of terror.

“That’s awesome.” Daniel chuckled. “I actually have a tattoo.”

Dad laughed then and Mum looked like she’d seen a ghost. Daniel seemed to not notice Mum’s annoyance and he lifted the sleeve on his dress shirt, revealing a skull head.

“You should have seen him. He looked like he was going to faint.” Jenny laughed too.

Dad poured some water, chuckling as he did so. I managed a nervous laugh. How was Mum going to take this? She hated tattoos.

“Daniel, why would you do that?” She asked, looking upset.

“Well, Jenny’s got three so I decided to give it a go. No pain, no gain.” Daniel grinned, and then looked lovingly at Jenny. She smiled back. They looked so in love.

“And your parents approve of you marking yourself like that?” Mum directed her next question at Jenny, who looked a little uncomfortable. Here we go again.

“My Mum passed away when I was five,” Jenny mumbled. “Dad doesn’t mind what I do. He always says it’s the strength of character that matters.”

I decided in that moment that I loved Jenny. She was smart and perfect for Daniel. Dad looked around frantically, hoping to change the subject before Mum could think up a retort.

“So, what do you think of the house?” He looked from Jenny to Jinxx.

Jenny seemed to have gone back into her shell and murmured about how nice it was. Mum beamed. This was her favourite thing. The house was her pride and joy. Jinxx nodded and smiled at me again when he noticed me watching him. He was so interesting, or maybe that was the wrong word for him.

Was I seriously falling for him? I looked at how Jenny and Daniel locked eyes and realised that was probably how I looked. I also realised that I didn’t dislike the feeling. I vaguely registered Dad saying something until I looked at him.

“Well, I wanted to hang the photo down here,” He spoke, and I felt so confused. “Sylvia said there was no room though.”

“I think you should. My prom photo is in the lounge.” Daniel suddenly sounded annoyed.
I snapped back to reality and looked at Jinxx. His eyes were impassive, giving nothing away so I looked to my older brother.

“Sorry, Ellie. Jeremy was just saying about your prom photo. You found it earlier in the attic, didn’t you?”

I frowned and then remembered the picture of me and Sophie in our gowns. Daniel’s photo was hanging on the wall. I nodded, not really understanding what was happening. Was my picture going to be hung in the lounge too? A giddy thrill ran down my back. That would be awesome.

“Daniel, sweetheart, there really is no room.” Mum turned to level a glare at my brother.

Daniel glowered at her, something I had never seen him do. He had always tried to keep the peace. He had never enjoyed being the favourite, but it seemed like he was going to say something. Dad didn’t seem to be saying anything.

“There’s never any bloody room, is there?” Daniel raised his voice. I jumped back at the tone. I felt Jinxx’s hand on mine. I looked at him and he was watching Daniel. This wasn’t going to be good.

I met Jenny’s eyes and she seemed very calm, like she had been expecting this all along. Maybe she had known Daniel wanted to say something. Daniel was on his feet in seconds.

“For years I’ve always been the favourite, but you seem to forget you have a daughter too. Ellie is just as important. She’s a great girl and she’ll help a lot of people with her job when she’s older,” He took a breath before continuing. “I’m sick and tired of her always playing second fiddle to me. It’s not fair.”

A silence descended on the table. Daniel had stood up for me. I wanted to run round the table and hug him. He pushed the chair back and it screeched on the dining room floor.
He turned and left the room. Jenny stood, following him too. I knew Mum and Dad would start fighting so I decided it was best to make a hasty retreat.

“L-let’s go sit in the garden.” I grabbed Jinxx’s hand before he could protest.

We walked through the house and out the back door. It was a beautiful night and the sun was just beginning to dip below the clouds. I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding in.
I could smell something and as we rounded the corner I saw Daniel and Jenny. My older brother was smoking. He was running a hand through his hair.

“Daniel?” I asked, tentatively.

He turned and smiled when he saw us. Jenny was sat on the bench, looking worried.

“Sorry about bringing up the photo.” Jinxx spoke.

“No, it’s fine. It needed to be said. Mum’s never treated Ellie right. I never used to say anything, but Jenny encouraged me to speak up.” Daniel smiled, exhaling the smoke.

I could hear them arguing from the garden. Daniel groaned and finished the cigarette. He stubbed it out on the wall and threw it in the black bin.

“Jenny and I are going to see if we can calm them down. I’d stay out here if I were you. Mum tends to blame everyone but herself.” Daniel gripped Jenny’s hand and they disappeared inside.

Well, that was eventful. I sat on the bench and I smiled when Jinxx sat next to me. I wasn’t mad about the whole prom photo thing. I agreed with Daniel. Right now I was battling my feelings and felt embarrassed by the whole thing.

“H-hey, sorry about that.” I mumbled.

His blue eyes locked with mine and he shrugged. In the dark he looked happier and I supposed he was more comfortable with shadows and not being seen.

“It’s cool.” He replied.

“No, it’s not. You got dragged into my family problems.” I sighed, listening to the fight inside.

“I shouldn’t have bought that photo up.” Jinxx chuckled.

“My Mum has never treated me like her daughter. I really want for her to love me the way she loves Daniel.” I shifted so I was comfortable.

Our eyes met in the dark and I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding in. This would be the first time I had ever discussed something so personal. We were centimetres apart and I could practically hear the beat of butterfly wings.

I could hear the sound of voices diminish and a door slammed. I stood abruptly and tried to stop my hands shaking. My lower lip was trembling. I spun round and nearly collided with Jinxx. I was forced to look into his eyes again.

His hands grasped my shoulders and I nearly freaked out when he dipped down slightly, filling in the height difference and pressing his lips to mine. The fluttering in my stomach intensified.

My hands were clasped to my chest in-between us and I tentatively lifted them to drape round his shoulders. This action forced me onto my tip-toes and pressed us closer. I let out a squeak when his arms wrapped round me.

The kiss deepened and I gasped when he nipped my lower lip. I pulled back, feeling more than a little scared by it. Our lips met again and a half sigh-half whimper was absorbed by the kiss. I copied his movements, enjoying the way our lips moved. It was like a dance. A dance that started at the lips, but affected my entire body.

I hoped my breath didn’t smell kept running through my mind. I marvelled at how soft Jinxx’s lips were and how he tasted like peppermint. I enjoyed how he would nip my lower lip and how his arms felt round me, one of his hands was pressed against my lower back. It felt amazing.

All good things must end and he pulled back first, leaving me confused and still clinging to him. I realised that and pulled back, feeling stupid.

“S-sorry, I’m not that good,” I blurted out. “No one’s ever kissed me before.”

I peeked up at Jinxx and was amazed by his eyes. They seemed darker now and I couldn’t identify the look in his eyes at the moment. It wasn’t one I was used to seeing.

“Practice makes perfect.” He smirked.

I yelped when his lips claimed mine again. It sent me reeling and I kissed back again, copying his movements and enjoying the passion in the kiss. Someone cleared their throat and we pulled apart.

Daniel was stood by the door, grinning. My face felt hot and I tried to hide. I buried my face in Jinxx’s chest. I heard Daniel laugh.

“It’s safe to come in now,” I could just about hear him.

I heard his retreating steps and I tilted my head a little, enjoying the view. Jinxx was looking towards the back door. I admired the way his hair was slightly spiked at the back and it definitely reminded me of a crow’s black feathers.

He seemed to sense me looking and his eyes trailed down. That same slightly arrogant smirk appeared on his full lips. He might have broken the kiss first, but I pulled back slightly.

I may have never been in a relationship, but I knew I didn’t want something that only lasted a night. Back at school, some of my friends had been in relationships like that and I wanted something serious. It sounded like a cheesy rom-com, but I wanted a proper boyfriend/girlfriend thing.

“Listen, I don’t know what you’re looking for.” I was surprised by how confident I sounded.

“I’m looking for whatever you’re looking for.” He interrupted.

I tilted my face to meet his eyes again. They were a lighter shade of blue now, but he looked serious.

“Well, I’m not the type of girl to go around kissing random guys.” I managed a nervous smile now.

“Well, that was your first kiss, right?” Jinxx grinned.

I felt my cheeks heat up and willed the blush to go away. I looked away and nodded my head.

“I want to be in a relationship.” I whispered.

I glanced at him again. He tried to meet my eyes and sighed when I refused to look. I felt a cold hand cup my chin, forcing me to look.

“Be mine?” His voice sent shivers down my spine. I parted my lips to speak, but could only manage to nod my head.

Notes