Make Me Feel Alive

I sniffled, my feelings hurt as I sat in front of my desk.
I pressed the tissue to my nose, and blinked hastily as I heard the elevator ding, hoping no one could tell I had been crying. I was still pretending I just had a cold.
"I have a delivery," the nicely dressed man said, holding a large vase of expensive looking flowers, all pretty blues and yellows.
"Thank you," I said around my tissue, signing for it quickly. I took the card from the stick, checking for the name.
I scowled.
I pulled open the card, and my eyes scanned his stupid handwriting.
Sorry I was a prick, I didn't mean to be. Forgive me?
No.
I tossed the card in the trash, and lifted the heavy vase into my arms.
I couldn't exactly smash it while I was in the office, so I could always use it to decorate the kitchens with. I strode to the back, sniffling again, and entered the kitchen, seeing one of our bands sprawled in the chairs.
"Nice flowers. Who are they from?" One of the guys asked, and I shrugged.
"Just some generic ones," I muttered, setting them in the center of the table.
"Really?" he frowned. "Because those are from Freidas downtown, and that place costs out the ass. I got some for my girlfriend last year on Valentines day, and it cost me fifty bucks for a vase smaller then that."
I frowned, looking at the flowers.
I was too pissed at him to forgive him.
Really, pregnant?
I wasn't stupid enough to get pregnant, even on accident. I couldn't even afford to keep up me and my cat now, let alone a child. He had completely overreacted, and he didn't give two shits about me.
All he wanted was the sex.
I tugged harshly on one flower, breaking all the petals off of it.
He couldn't fix this with flowers.
No matter how pretty and scented they were.
And blue was my favorite color.
"Morgan?"
I glanced up, seeing the guys were staring at me.
"What?"
"Why are you tearing up the flowers? I thought they were to decorate with."
"They are," I muttered, dropping my hand and tossing the petals in the trash. "That one was ugly. The entire thing is ugly."
They just stared at me.
Irritated, I stalked from the room and back to my desk. I didn't need their judgement.
I didn't need anyone.
I plopped down in my chair with a huff, tucking my hair behind my ear. I quickly scrolled to my emails, seeing I had several from the other secretaries that needed answering concerning appointments.
Stupid, pigheaded, arrogant, self-serving asshole, I thought angrily, glaring at nothing inparticular.
He didn't care one bit.
I don't know why I cared, he'd made it perfectly clear in the beginning our relationship was strictly for fun, nothing else. So when it was over, it was over, and I'd made it very clear it was over.
I didn't need him, I didn't need his stupid face, or his stupid clothes, or any of his stupid bullshit.
And I especially didn't need him dressing up my cat!
Toby was pain enough as it was!
I wiped my nose with another tissue.
This is what you get, Morgan, having a fling with a guy you knew would just ditch you in the end. Well, technically, I ended it, but it wasn't like it wasn't heading that way anyway. good things didn't last forever, my mother had told me, and she was right.
There was no such thing as a good thing, or love, or any of that nonsense.
Trevor had taught me early on how easy it was to let someone use and abuse you, how easy it was to think that someone actually cared about you when they didn't.
Ashley had no right to be jealous, possessive, caring, nor did he need to send me stupid, ugly flowers that had too much pollen and hurt my allergies!
Because that's why my eyes were running again.
Allergies.
"Ms. Tate, what time is my next appointment?"
I glanced over at Mr. Wireman as he strode into the lobby, checking his briefcase.
"Four O'Clock with Mr. Aceware," I told him, and he glanced over at me, frowning.
"Are you still sick?"
"Yeah. A cold. Allergies." Something.
"Eh, shouldn't you be at home and not spreading germs? This is a office, not a clinic."
I narrowed my eyes. "I can be here working, telling you when your appointments are, or I can go home and you can check them yourself, and get your mail, and your coffee and figure out when you have a phone call or your ex-wife is on the phone."
He just stared at me.
I turned my attention back to the computer screen, ignoring him, and he finally continued walking, stepping into the elevator.
So there.
I glanced down at my phone as I heard it buzz, seeing it was a text from Ashley asking if I'd gotten anything today.
I ignored him, too.
He was gonna have to get used to that.
The office phone rang, and I answered it with a sigh.
"Starling Studios, this is Morgan."
"Do you still have a cold?"
"Wh--- Ashley," I scowled. "You can't be calling me at work."
"Well, you're not answering your phone otherwise, so what do you expect me to do?"
"Leave me alone."
"See, I don't think that's right," he told me, sounding slightly smug. "You don't mean it. You're just pissed off at me from the other day."
"You're right, I am pissed at you! And I'm done with our stupid, stupid whatever you want to call it. It's done!"
"Morgan, come on!"
"No! I'm serious, Ashley!"
"Well, so am I! I didn't mean to hurt your feelings the other day, okay? I just freaked out because I thought... well, you know! And that scared me. I'm not ready for anything like that."
"That didn't give you any right to ignore me for basically a week."
"You didn't call me but once!"
"Because you were all grouchy the last time I had!" I spat. "I figured you didn't want to talk to me anymore."
"I --- that's not it at all." he sounded frustrated now, and I could hear people in the background, calling for him. "Look, I have to go now, but I'm gonna call you later, okay?"
"Don't bother." I slammed the phone down in the cradle.
"And your flowers are stupid," I muttered, more to myself then anything.
"Whose flowers?"
I glanced over, seeing one of the clients looking at me curiously; I hadn't even realized they'd walked up.
"Um, sorry, no one's. How can I help you?" I forced a bright smile on my face, despite the fact it was streaked with mascara and I had the worst stuffy nose imaginable.

Notes

Wow, he really did hurt her feelings! Do you think they're really over?