My Reality

It's Friday already and my stomach feels sick. I feel that when I see Sam I'll break down and not be able to fight back. I wanna be strong, but I can't for the same reason I couldn't fight against my so called father, he has dominated me. I fear him now because I know he no longer has a limit. He will hurt verbally hurt me, he will abuse me, he will touch me. He is soulless and will do as he pleases. But I don't want him to win. I want to be able to be rid of him for as long as I live. I'm not actually sure how I'll go about doing so, but I realize I'm a bit out of choices.

I put on my Guns N Roses tanktop, my black leggings, and my combat boots. I brush my hair and put on a beanie. I grab my bag and leave the house. I get a text from James.

James: I know you probably don't want to talk to me, I don't know why but I'd definitely like to. Anyways, can you meet me at lunch?

I know this sounds stupid, but the reason I've been avoiding James is because he swore to me he'd protect me from Sam and look at what's happened. I got kidnapped, raped, witnessed murder, and he's about to take me again because otherwise everyone I love would die. But I know it's not James's fault, he couldn't have really prevented it.

Scarlet: Yeah, I'll meet you in guidance.

When I get to school, I go straight to the music room as always. There's already a new piece of music on my stand. I sit down and grab my guitar. The song's called Die For You. Sometimes I feel as if Jake knows what's going on in my life at all times. It's strange, but helpful. I begin to play. I notice the lyrics on another sheet beside me. As I read them, I slowly get more anxiety about tonight. I'm screwed.

It's finally lunch and I go to guidance to meet James. When he sees me he leaps up and hugs me like he hasn't seen me for months. He pulls me outside to the back of the school and we sit next to each other on the wall.

"I'm sorry." He says and I raise a brow.

"Don't apologize, you didn't do anything. I was stupid and blamed you partly because you promised you'd protect me." I say.

"You're right, I did promise to protect you, I'm sorry I let you down. If there was any way I could have prevented it, I would have." He says.

"I know, and I really shouldn't have blamed any of it on you. I want to go back to the way it was before, I really do."

"You sound like you can't let yourself go back to the way things used to be."

"That's because I can't. I think this is the time to say goodbye."

"What do you mean? What's going on Scar?"

"I can't tell you." Tears build up in my eyes. "Believe me, I really want to tell, but I can't. I'm not putting yours or anyone else's lives at risk because of me."

"I don't care, I promised to protect you so let me do so now."

"He's after me. He said to meet him at midnight tonight. He threatened you all, I can't let you or anyone else get hurt."

"Sam." I nod.

"He said to meet him where we first officially met. The party in the summer, I was just in grade nine. I was an idiot, I let a fucking senior touch me, and kiss me, God was I stupid." James pulls me into his lap, I cry into his chest.

"Hush, it's not your fault, none of this is your fault. Give me the address of the place and I'll take care of it."

"No, I can't let you, he'll kill you."

"No, just go there at midnight like you planned, you'll be the bait. I won't let him hurt you anymore, just give me the address and let me help." He hands me his phone. I take it and type in the address.

"Why are you friends with me?" I ask and he looks at me confused.

"Why not? I think the real question is; why are you friends with me?" He asks.

"Because you're comforting, sweet, funny, and not a snob." I say.

"That's why I'm friends with you, you're all of those things and more. You helped me with my drug addiction, so now I have an actual future. I love you Scar, you're the best."

"I love you too James."

"You don't get it." He mutters.

"What?" I ask.

"Nothing, I'm just glad things can go back to the way they were." We sit there for the rest of lunch and then I go to my last two classes.

Finally English has arrived and I'm thrilled, all we're doing is watching Romeo & Juliet to observe the difference of the film and the actual writing. I've read and seen Romeo & Juliet so many times that I don't need to do it again. I sit at my desk and draw myself as Juliet. I've always loved the name Juliet, it sounds so innocent and elegant, reasons why that's not my name. My name's Scarlet, as in a scarlet letter. I am a sin, a scar on an arm, I am not a Juliet, but sometimes I wish I was.

Taylor begins kicking my leg, I don't really care though, I'm off in my own little world. But then she starts punching my arm, which gets my attention.

"Stop!" I shout in a whispered tone.

"Shut up, nobody cares anyways, you're just a little emo whore." She says with a smirk. I take out my phone while she continues to punch me, and text Andy.

Scarlet: Taylor's punching me, can you do something?

Andy's phone vibrates and he looks up from his desk. He takes the remote and pauses the movie.

"Miss Matthews get the hell out of my classroom and go to the principal's office!" He shouts making me smile. She rolls her eyes and leaves the room. "Now let's continue. Miss Osbourne, may I speak with you in the hall?"
We walk out of the room and I hug him as soon as the door closes.

"Thank you for sticking up for me." I say.

"Of course, I love you and will do anything for you." He says.

"I can't wait till tonight, you're gonna love my dress." I say.

"I can't wait either, I was thinking that maybe after we could go back to my apartment."

"Yeah I'll meet you at one."

"One in the morning? Why not at midnight? That's when the dance ends."

"Because you love me and won't interrogate me any further."

"Okay, we should probably go back inside."
We both walk back into the classroom and finish watching the movie.

Notes

This book is coming to an end, I think I might cry when it does. Anyhow, what do you thinks gonna happen next? Also is there any thoughts on James' comment?

Shout Outs:

eclaire
ChanceBVB
Ellie-phant


love ya<3