The Moment

I walked out of my room, and went into my old one.
It's somewhere nobody would think to look for me.
I sat myself on the bed and just stared at the blade in my hands.
This room was from when I was younger, my mom refused to let me change the girly kiddie things in here so I just went to a different room as I got older.
I took a deep breath, and thought about what would happen if I did this again.
So many different thoughts swam through my head.
"I can't do this" I screamed as I threw the blade across the room.
Ash must have been nearby because soon enough he walked into the room.
"Babe, come on... don't be upset." Ash softly said to me as he came in and sat down beside me.
I curled myself into him, and let him hold me. Hoping his touch would help me feel better.
I felt a few tears slip down my cheeks, and looked up to Ashley's kind face.
He moves down and kisses me softly on the lips and quietly says, "Don't listen to that prick babe, he doesn't know anything."
I don't feel like saying anything, I just want to hear Ashley.
"Do you want me to go away?" he asks.
I nod my head no.
"Do you want me to sing to you?"
I nod my head yes, and he softly starts singing one of my new favorite songs to me.
I'm so glad I made him listen to this song so much

We lay on our backs
Out on the front yard
Holding your right hand
I say "life's been so hard"

The shade of the tree we planted
It grew strong with roots and branches
But it's just not ours anymore

We build these walls high,
they blend into the sky
Thick skin and bones
defend us from outside
The way we lost it all
I think it made you strong

"But I don't feel that anymore" I whisper sing to myself.
"Come on, you know this song like you wrote it yourself. Sing it with me sweetheart. Singing will make you feel better."

Together we sing:
I feel nothing at all, yeah I trip and I fall
Running straight into walls
While you're suffering withdrawals
When will I ever get a better hand?
I am losing my hope and it hurts in my throat
Have my back to the coast at the end of my rope
Oh, will I ever be a better man?
Am I meant to be alone?

We lay on our backs on the hood of my car
Holding my right hand, you point out the North Star
Show me the way ahead, guide me with light I said
Cause I can’t see straight anymore
Everyone left me all at once then
Honestly, I couldn’t even blame them
I’ve been a shitty friend
I don’t know where you went
I just can’t handle any more

I feel nothing at all, yeah I trip and I fall
Running straight into walls while you’re suffering withdrawals
When will I ever get a better hand?
I am losing my hope and it hurts in my throat
Have my back to the coast at the end of my rope
Oh, will I ever be a better man?
Am I meant to be alone?

"Baby, say something to me." Ash says.
I lean in closer to him and feel safer.
I find the strength to calm myself down and reply, "Thanks babes. Singing did really help relax me. You should go help the others with the Max thing. Who knows what happened while we've been in here."
"They're big boys and girls. I'm sure they're handling it just fine."
"I dunno, sometimes CC makes me question how old he is." I giggle.
"So I'm not the only one who thinks that way! Yes!" he cheers.
"I think everyone questions how old CC is. I mean look at him, he's what? Mid twenties or so. He looks and acts a lot younger."
Just as I finish my sentence Max gets thrown into the room, and door shuts and locks.
Damn it, why does this room have to lock from the outside.
"Well well well, look what we have here. Purdy and his little toy." Max taunted.

Notes

So yeah, if you were wondering what song that is it's Roots and Branches by This Wild Life.
They're really good, and I'm pretty sure they're playing Warped Tour again this year.