Save Me From Myself
Dont Break This Promise
Anger consumed his face. He grabbed my fore-arms, but had a moment of hesitance. I could see that he didn't want to hurt me again. He pulled me away from the beds. "Show me..." He lowly growled. I lowered my head, and shook it. I didn't want him to see the ugly marks. I knew how much he was against it. He pushed my back against the wall. He slowly lowered his head, until his forehead was resting on mine. "Please," he begged, his voice sad, "let me see." I hiccuped a tear. He needed to see, didn't he?
His eyes wandered to my bracelets. He released one of his hands off my arms, and moved it down to my wrist. He twisted them around for a minute, then very slowly, started to remove the bracelets.
I was scared. How would he react to this? He'll probably hate me after this...
With every bracelete he removed, more ugly, angry, deep red marks appeared. I looked up at Andy. He had such a pained look on his face. Like he was the one bearing the marks instead of me. After he took of the very last bracelet, we were both pretty much in tears. I had so many marks. My arms just looked shredded with them. He lightly traced my cuts and scars. It would have felt good, if I wasn't so scared.
"Emily..." he started, "Why? Why would you do this to yourself?"
My watery eyes blurred my vision. I blinked, and the tears streamed down. "I-I find that it somehow... gives me release. It's the only way that I can punish my self for...for all the shit I've caused in my life."
He looked so sad, so pained. It was like he was broken. "You mean with your parents?" I nodded. "All of those things my dad made me do. All of the abuse I got over the years. I would dwell on it. I would become depressed on it, until I just didn't have any other escape." The tears kept flowing, and I saw one tear fall down Andy's face. He whiped away mine, but never stopped tracing my scars. I dropped to my knees, standing was aching, and my legs were shaking. Andy dropped down next to me, and with that, he let go of my arms, and closed his hands around mine.
"Emily," he whispered, "none of that was your fault. None of it. But this-" he pointed to my wrist, "is not the answer. Please, please stop doing this to yourself. If you ever feel the urge, just come to me. I don't care what I'm doing. I'll drop everything and help you. I never want you to do it again." I tried to say ok, but choked up on tears, so again, I just nodded. "Promise me." He said. I looked up into his blue eyes. "Promise me, you'll never do this again."
I thought about everything that ever happened to me. Every mark I made, every mistake and wrong road I took. Cutting was my only release. But... maybe I had found another.
"I-I promise." I choked out.
He sighed with relief, and pulled me close for a hug. I held myself in his embrace, loving the feeling of someone else caring. He pulled away for a moment, and his gorgeous blue eyes locked with my gaze. He leaned in, and lightly kissed my forehead. I blushed, hard, and put my arms around his neck, pulling him into yet another hug. I laid my head on his chest, and I felt his arms wrap around me. I felt protected in his arms. And that was when I knew, that for the first time, I was finally, truely starting to heal.
Andy's POV
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I wanted to be there for her. I wanted her to know that I cared. Whenever she was sad, I'd do whatever I could to help her smile. Cause her true smile? It was beautiful. She, was beautiful. I made a promise to myself. I would never hurt her. I would never leave her when she needed me. I'd be her shoulder to cry on. And I'd never leave her side. This was my promise, and it was my job not to break it.
you should totally continue, this story is amazing! its one of my favorites!
4/21/15