I cut myself with knives and pens

I heard my alarm going off. Wait, that's my late alarm! I fell back asleep, OH SHIT! I'm going to be late for work. I through myself out of bed and ran to my wardrobe. Hmm, what to wear, what to wear. Maybe some music will inspire me. I blasted on my Ipod. Coffin came on, my favourite BVB song. Coffin, dead, afterlife, zombie, dawn of the dead. I will wear my black dawn of the dead t shirt with my violet skinny jeans and my ankle boots. I plasterd on my makeup, dragged a brush through my hair and was ready to leave. Luckily my job at Blue banana was only 5 minutes away, I could easily get there by foot. The light burned my eyes as Left the house. Amazing thing light is, couldn't live without it but it can bun you whether your to close or not. My life's a bit like that. I have great friends, a loving boyfriend, everything seems great. But it's not. I arrived at work, late as usual. I put my bag down behind the counter and went upstairs to help with the piercings. My best friend Beth there waiting for me.
"Don't worry" she whispered "I covered for you, no one even noticed you were gone."
"Oh my god, thank you so much, you are a life saver!" I gasped with relief. She ain't half a good friend. I met her at work, she gave me the idea of getting a job. I had gone here to get my nose pierced, and she was the one doing it. She was talking to me about all sorts of stuff. Eventually it got into talking about her job. She told me about it being quite fun, meeting people who are into the same clothes, music and body art as you. I thought to myself 'I need a job, I need money, and I need to make more friends, so why not?" So our friendship started from there.
Anyway so I was working till 2, then I got to go.
"RHIAN! WAIT!" Beth called from behind. "Lets meet the others at maccy d's"
"NOOOOO! I am NOT eating mcdonalds. I'm not hungry anyway."
"Fine then if your not hungry, we'll meet the others at mcdonalds and you wont have to eat if you don't want." She suggested, a smile creeping on her very pierced face.
"Fine, I guess it's time I did leave the house, and not just to go to work and to shop."
"Yeah, you NEVER have any fun anymore" she whined. If only she knew.
Beth knows I suffer from depression but she has no idea how bad it is. She has no idea about me slicing through my hips, wrists, stomach and anywhere else that hasn't already got a fresh one on. My whole body is full of scars and cuts. Beth has no idea that I think about suicide all the time and I have attempted to kill myself 7 times. She has no idea that I haven't eaten more then a mango a day for the last 2 weeks. She doesn't know what's going through my head.
I honestly hate myself. Everything about myself. I hate my hair, so I die and cut it. I hate my voice, so I don't talk much. I hate my face, so I plaster on make up and pierce it. I hate stomach so I cut it and diet. I hate my skin, so I make my own. That's the secret behind my tattoos. I created my own skin. That's the burning part of my light life.

Notes

Thanks for the comments on, last chapter.
By the way, please take a look at my close friends story. She's a lot more experienced than me at writing fanfics so it's probably going to be a bit better than mine.
Its called: In the end, we all fall in love

Will be telling you about more stories I like next time
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