Look Up To Me

My Mother looked at me as she moved her hands up and down her leg, she did this often it helped her calm down and relax. "Well?" I asked slowly my mind racing with thoughts, what if I wasn't their kid, what if they were going to give me up again, what if they found out about my past? Was all I could think about, my past, all the scars and all the time spent in my bathroom lonely and scared about the future and about everything in my life, constantly doubting myself and attempting to get good grades but failing with my Teachers asking me if there was anything I wanted to tell them. And me refusing to confess my addiction to a heartless, lifeless piece of metal that took over my life. I broke away from my thought when my Mom began to speak, slow at first, "Ryley, theres something your Father and I have to tell you." She started, I nodded, trying to nudge her to go on, I heard this all before to only have my Mom back out many times in the past, but this time she didn't, "Grandma and Grandpa didn't tell you the real reason why we had to leave you with them." My eyes widened as I thought of my last name and theirs, Purdy, why did it sounds so familiar? I blanked out for a second as my Mom repeated my name, "Ryley! Listen to me!" She said in a stern tone that made me jump.

"Oh yeah sorry." I responded running a hand through my raven black hair as my Mother went on, "You have a Brother." she breathed out rather forcefully as she met her eyes to mine, "W.what?" I said my eyes going ten times wider than before, "Yes, his name is Ashley, Ashley Purdy and were supposed to go see him at Vans Warped Tour this year, suprise him with you." My Mother told me, "Wait. Warped? Were going to Warped to see..." My mother cut me off before I could say those three words,"Yes your going to see and meet all the Black Veil Brides." She said with a gleaming smile. I stood up and looked at her with a happy smile, "OH MY GOD! My brother is Ashley freaking Purdy...." I shouted rather loudly as I jumped up and down. My Mothers laugh rang out like a bell as she grabbed my arm lightly, "Calm down Ry, we still have to pack and everything." She reminded me, I hated packing, but maybe this time it would be different. "When are we leaving?" I asked slowly taking a deep breath as I still thought about the fact that a famous rock star was my older Brother. I looked down at the faded scars on my wrists, my bracelets were covering them and had been for a good round of years.

As my Mom spoke I lightly and slowly lifted my head, "Today, later though, around five o clock." My head shot up the rest of the way as she handed me her notes, they were one everything she planned, we would surprise Ashley at his Hotel, and hopefully wouldn't freak him out, and then the next day we would be making our way to Warped Tour, which I couldn't stop thinking about, and there was no way I was going to calm down about this whole thing, no way in hell. I smiled at the tickets, they weren't just any tickets, they were the collectible tickets, that must have costed my Mom hundreds to get, since we didn't have very much money and my Father was always on trips for business, so he would send money every now and then, but other than that we were a pretty poor family. I eyed the next part of the paper, the time we leave and what time our flight lifts off, we would be flying to LA, and our plane would leave at 7pm. And finally we would land around 12 when we got to LA. A smirk grew on my face as I walked over to my IHome which was decked out with band stickers, and plugged in my phone, so that it could one, charge, and two, listen to my saviors to pump up my attitude more about this.


I pressed the shuffle icon on my screen and smiled as Knives and Pens began to play, it was one of the first songs I listened to when I was nine, when I figured out that I was alone and that my Parent's left me here. I walked over to my closet, opening the small door and pulling out all my band t-shirts, I honestly didn't know which ones to pick, I mean their band shirts! I can't pick which ones I want to take! I then pulled out my favorite pair of ripped skinnies and a few other pairs of pants along with my band tights, that I would probably end up wearing to warped, when the day came.


After a few hours of packing and singing along to BVB I was finally done, it was around four, so I had an hour to relax, which meant watching interviews, I know it seems a little stockerish, but it keeps me updated on what my bands are doing, and when they would release new CDs, I typed YouTube.com into my search bar, and it came up almost immediately, my next task was to see what new things my Brother was up to with his band mates, or in other words I was going to watch Bryan Stars interviews, I watch him all the time and he always makes me smile and makes me forget about other things, I plugged in my ear buds and listened carefully smiling every now and then at a comment or action that Bryan would make. And to my suprise my Mother ripped out my earbud and smiled at me, "Hey!" I commented laughing a bit as she made a funny face to calm me down about her interrupting me in the middle of an interview. "Time to go Ry." My mother told me as I jumped out of my bed, grabbed my sweatshirt and my bags and rushed down the stairs to the car, then loading them.


I was more then excited to go to Warped and to see someone who began to mean a lot to me.

Notes

Argh, sorry that its so long and oddly written.