Forgive me.

I grabbed his waist and pulled him closer, I wanted him, and I didn't know if it was the whiskey or my head, but I didnt care. His lips connected with mine roughly and we were suddenly pushed up against a wall with our tongues and lips colliding in perfect sync, our own beat. I put my fingers in his hair and I pulled back and started laughing, at first he didn't know why, but then he remembered that his hair was still in the braid. My back slid down the wall as I laughed and I rested my knees against my chest. He drops to the floor in front of me and laughs. I leant in and pulled the hair tie out of his hair and he ran his fingers through, pulling out the braid. "We're drunk right?" He asked, still laughing. "I think yes"
"It's not right if we do it"
"I know" We both burst into giggles, for no reason whatsoever. He crawled over, purposely sticking his butt up, mocking being sexy. I burst with laughter and he dropped, his head between my knees. "Sing that song again, the one about the dolls." I raise an eyebrow and I laugh. "Give me a guitar, I think I can remember how to play it." He nodded and stumbled/ran into the hallway, into some unknown room, 5 minutes later he came back with an acoustic guitar, which looked like it cost a fortune, i rest it on my lap and I pluck a few strings to see if it's tuned. I start to play and sing. "Hey girl! Open the walls, play with your dolls, we'll be a perfect family.." He laid back down between my knees and laid his chin on his hands. "WAIT wait wait wait wait" I laughed and stop playing "whaaaat whaaaaaaaat" he pulled out his phone from his jeans and turns it so the camera is focussed on me. "I have to record you!" I squeezed my eyes shut and laughed. "Fiiiiine! Can I go now?" He nodded, bit his lip, and stared at his phone as his flash came on and illuminated the dark room, "oh I took a photo!" He changed to video, and the flash came on, but stayed on as it started recording, I laughed and started playing, singing the lyrics, and I would purposely emphasise some words and Ashley would shake the camera because he was laughing too hard.

I woke up the next day with a headache that felt like wasps were crawling under my skin on my temples, stinging me again and again. Ashley walked over with Panadol and a cup of water, after finally being able to get up, I sipped the water and swallowed the tablet with it. My dark brunette hair was wavy and covered half of my face as I walked to the kitchen, the huge trenches I had cut into my skin felt stiff and if I moved too much, the stitches would have split. The bruises on my neck were fading fast and I was very glad of it. I leant on the kitchen table, faced my head downwards and letting my hair run down my face, blocking out some light. Ashley slid his phone into my barrier and he whispered "press play." I did and watched myself play the guitar, and sing, I was obviously drunk, and I was laughing way too much.
"You're very beautiful faith,"
"So are you pretty boy,"
I kept watching the video, and in it I kept drinking and singing different songs, before last night I hadn't played a guitar in a few years. Ashley had set the phone up on a shelf, and on the shelf you could see the entire lounge room. We danced, we kissed, we sang, we talked. I'm surprised the other boys didn't yell at us for being too loud. After the video finished I slid it back to him. "Just in case you don't remember anything." And it was true, I didn't. "Thanks ash." He grunted a little and Rosie toddled out, tired and her hair in a fluffy mane. "Morning sweetheart." I started to feel the wasps calm, from the Panadol probably. The video kept running through my head like a stream, hitting rocks and rushing through me. Or maybe I need to pee. Andy shuffles into the kitchen and picked up Rosie, and put her on his shoulders. "Now hold on okay?" He looked at me to see if it was okay, and I nodded, with a sleepy smile on my face. I started making breakfast for Rosie and I, searching through what seemed like thousands of cupboards before I was able to find the bowls, as I did I quietly sang to myself. "And it feels like I am. Just to close to love you.. There's nothing I can really say..." Rosie started squealing "ANDY ANDY MOMMYS SINGING!" I shut my eyes and stopped. Only my dearest child would make a big deal out of me singing. "She's pretty good isn't she sweetheart?" Andy started spinning, while Rosie was still squealing and laughing. I was euphoric in that moment, I'm finally in a house where I am not threatened by drugs and alcohol and abuse. My beautiful baby is being raised right. With a roof over her head and food on the table. "Oh faith, the boys and I are recording today, it's going to take a while, and we can't be distracted, Ashley has already recorded his part, so do you want to go out with him and little Rosie " he started to jump, making Rosie giggle like a madman "so the guys don't have to worry about anything other than recording," I nodded and smiled, remembering to the night before. Andy put her down and she runs to me, swaying a bit while she runs because she was so dizzy, her cheeks were red and her eyelashes were wet from laughing so hard she had started to cry. "Cmon sweety we have to get ready," after searching through the very limited amount of clothes we had I found some for her that she would be able to wear in the hot California weather. I found a grey v neck shirt and black skinny jeans that had some wear and tear in them. After some digging I had found some ankle high boots/heels that I had fallen in love with and I had bought at 15, after realising that they were too big I had always kept them just in case one day they would fit me. Well today was the day. I brushed my hair and put it into a messy bun. Then I brushed Rosie's and she refused to let me do her hair any other way other than the way I had it.

Notes

Guys I am so tired
and it's only like 10:45 at night
anyway, hope you enjoy the chapter, if you like it subscribe and please give me constructive criticism in the comments, anything that can improve my writing~