The Preacher's Daughter

The thought of my sister now having a baby, scares the living hell out of me, i am not sure why? But this is just unreal.

"You okay?" I turn my head slowly seeing Andy's mom with a small smile. Today from all days where i actually wanted the day to myself Amy barge into my house and said she wanted a girl's day out. After this i need to go to the hospital yet again and well keep my sister company.

"I am just tired that's all," i whisper watching as the houses pass by. I have this feeling, i can not describe it but i am sensing something is going to happen sure. Being raised in a religion household you don't have expectations, my father taught me; you die live by the sword you will die by it and i cant help to think i die in vain, and i am pretty sure the person who will kill me is Andy.

"Is something bothering you Gracie?" There is a few things bothering me really.

"Mrs. Biersack what can you tell me me about Andy's ex?"

Her head turn slightly to me as her brow arch. "What do you mean?" I am imagining things but i swore i saw fear in her eyes.

"I mean why did they broke up, i cannot actually ask Andy he is a bit- well he is Andy."
Andy never hurt me intentionally, but what i am doing now i am looking for a slap or a spank. I am going behind his back now but i need to know why i feel so weird, i need to know if he is the case, and more importantly i need to know if i can trust him once again. We have been through so much, dead and alive; but something is keeping me- us apart. It is not the sex nor it is the love between us, but something more, something involving his past, and his past will affect our future.

"i am just curious." i mummer giving her a soft smile.

"Gracen, Andy is different. He always were. I only met two of his girlfriends, Scout and well Juliet, both of those girls very much in love him, and i believe they still is, but...." she drifts of as we enter the driveway of Andy's childhood home. She turn her body to me staring me deep into my eyes. "Andy was bullied in high school, for being as the kids say a 'fag' he wore black listen to heavy metal and such, he was not the jock type as you notice and i believe that has followed him here, he never was in control." Okay... where is this going. "I love my baby so much Gracen but you have to trust me when i say this he is fear himself, he is afraid to get attached, i was surprised that he actually founded someone like you who would love him just the way he is, not for his fame nor his money but the person he really is."

"And what is he really?" The nightmare i have came to or the sweet dream that vanished?
"Grace is there something you want to say, say it." She mumbles.

I grit on on my teeth shaking my head slowly. "I really love your son, he is my everything i would die for him but he scares me." A soft gasp escape my lips as i utter those words. I am not scared of what he made me into, i am scared of what i made him into. "Ever since we started our relationship he did not really show me his real colors since i ask him to, i am not sure if it was a huge mistake for asking him that or it was an eye opener for me, but Mrs. Biersack i don't know what to do. Something happen and i know he is not going to like it, and i am afraid he leave me."

Now the fear has vanished and worry approached her face. "What is wrong?"
"He never wanted this-" Tears begin to prick in my eyes. My throat swelled up and i felt i could not breathe, the motion in my body has gone upwards into oblivion. I never been so scared in my life.

"Who knows?" She asks with a heavy sigh.

"No one," i whisper biting my lower lip as i lower my head, there i broke down in tears. "i can't do this."

Amy's arms rapped around my body cradling me as she caresses my hair. "Shh, we have to figure this out."

"How?" i plead pushing her away. "You know how he is, he never want this and now a damn reporter is gonna tell the whole world unless i shut her up."

"Don't go there Gracen." She warns releasiing her hand from mine. "Andy is not a monster." Did you met your son yet? He can be if he wants to be.

"So what am i supposed to do?"

"Tell him."

"How am i going to tell your son that i am pregnant?"

Notes