I never meant to be the one
Who kept you from the dark
But now I know my wounds are sewn
Because of who you are
I will take this burden on
And become the holy one
But remember I am human
And I'm bound to sing this song

“Freak!”

“Loser!”

“Worthless!”


The names that they called out to her as Brady walked down the hall were like small little knives slashing at her skin. She had her red hair hanging down in her face, more so because it hid the tears in her eyes than anything else, but as she walked with her back hunched over and her books in her arms, she still felt like breaking down. Sixteen and different-need she say more? Brady had two best friends-Trish and Moira-who were also different like her, but they weren’t in school today for some reason. That meant that Brady had to be by herself and that was the worst thing in the world.

She wasn’t that different than most-she just liked to listen to loud music with heavy guitars and lots of screaming. Brady didn’t walk around in dresses or skirts-she wore skinny jeans, band shirts and black boots almost every day. Most of the time people left them alone when the three girls were together, but today she was flying solo and it was really hard for her. As she walked down the hallway towards homeroom, Brady glanced down at her arm and winced-the scars that sat there were a grim reminder of a time in her life when everything had fallen apart. Her parents had gotten divorced, her mother had left her with her father and she had felt completely alone. Thank God for Moira and Trish-they were always there for her when she needed them.

So where were they today?


“Well if it isn’t the suicidal freakshow! Where are your friends today Brady? Not here-did they kill themselves last night?” Brittany Stafford was blocking the hallway and Brady only sighed as she looked up, her green eyes still filled with tears.

“Just leave me alone Brittany-I…I’m late for class.” Brady said, her voice soft and her eyes fell to the ground once again. Moira wasn’t scared of Brittany, but Brady was and the blonde girl knew it.

“What’re these…” Brittany said nastily as she grabbed for one of Brady’s arms and pulled it out for all to see. Her scars were shining in the light and everyone who saw them looked down at her and laughed.



So hear my voice remind you not to bleed
I'm here-
Savior will be there
When you are feeling alone, oh
A savior for all that you do
So you live freely without their harm

Brady kept her head down while she sat in her English class-Brittany and two of her clones were in the row behind her and she could hear them laughing about something. Brady was tired of people laughing at her-everyone seeing her scars this morning and then laughing about them to her face had been cruel, but it showed her something about her life. She was a joke-plain and simple. Everything about Brady Morris was a complete joke. She walked around with Moira and Trish, acting like she was all happy with a smile on her face-lies, all lies.

Inside Brady was screaming, crying out for someone to just end it all for her, but no one ever came to help her. She came to realize as she sat in that English class, their teacher going on and on about something to do with Keats, that Brady was going to have to take her life in her own hands. How should she do it? It was still winter in Virginia-so the rivers were all frozen over which meant no jumping from a bridge. Falling from the top of the building would be quick, but there was always that chance that she could survive. Hanging? God that would hurt and Brady felt a crick in her neck form just from thinking about it. Finally she glanced to her right and looked at her own arm.

The scars there were at least a year old-she had been clean for a year-and yet they were still there, puffed up and shining under the fluorescent lighting that the school provided them. She could start up again-maybe that would buy her some time and relieve some of the pain she felt deep within. As she sat there and stared at her arms, Brady closed her eyes and thought about the one person in the world who was always there for her-Andy Biersack. She didn’t know him-she wished she did-but she listened to his words daily and he always had a piece of advice for her. Never give in, never back down. We’ll brave this storm.

All good words and Brady smiled as she thought to the coming summer. Black Veil Brides-the band that Andy fronted-would be touring for the first time on Warped Tour and this was the first year that the three friends would be allowed to go. Black Veil Brides were also putting out a new album right before the tour started and Brady really didn’t want to miss it. She had seen their new video for the album-Fallen Angels-and she liked what she heard. Her thoughts were broken suddenly as Brady felt something flick against the back of her neck and she winced as it happened again.


“Thinking of running that razor over your skin again freak? Good-you deserve to die.” Someone hissed into her ear and Brady said nothing as she just gripped her pencil and shut her eyes.


The pencil snapped in her hands as the whispering continued, but something else inside of Brady snapped and she knew now what she needed to do.



So here I write my lullaby
To all the lonely ones
Remember as you learn to try
To be the one you love
So I can take this pen
And teach you how to live
What is left unsaid
The greatest gift I give

You are kind. You are smart. You are special.

Over and over again Brady recited this to herself as she sat on the bumping bus that would take her back home-finally her day of torture had come to an end. She was sitting in the middle section of the bus, her earbuds in her ears as Brady tried to get lost in Andy’s words and his voice. The song she was listening to-Knives and Pens-always gave her comfort, but even now she could see the benefits of knives over pens. What was the point of writing things down when no one cared enough to listen? No one cared about her-no one saw her for who she really was…a loving and happy girl.

After half an hour of the worst ride of her life-Brittany and her cronies always sat in the back of her bus-Brady was thankful to find herself at the end of her driveway. She groaned though-her father’s car was there and she knew that this day was only going to get worse. Her mother had left them-had left her-and her father wasn’t the nicest person in the world. He was a drinker, he didn’t hit her, but he hated that she was different and often blamed her difference for why her mother left them. Brady sucked in a breath as she got closer and closer to the house and she could see that her father was in the snow covered driveway, working on his car again.


“How was school Brady?” He asked as she passed and Brady stopped, tugging one earbud out of her ear, but her music could still be heard. Her father, with red hair just like her own, scrunched up his nose and looked down at her. Her black jeans, black shirt and black nails-why did she have to be so weirdly different?

“It was fine.” She said simply as she turned but she knew her father wasn’t done with her-not yet.

“Why do you have to dress like that Brady-girl? Don’t you want kids to like you?” He asked as she just closed her eyes and turned back to face him. His arms were covered in grease and he needed knew shoes-her father was not the pinnacle of fashion right now.

“Because I like to dad. Besides…I have friends…” She said as she moved to walk into their old farm house that needed a new roof.

Yeah, she had friends…she just didn’t know where they were right now.



So hear my voice remind you not to bleed
I'm here-
Savior will be there
When you are feeling alone, oh
A savior for all that you do
So you live freely without their harm

Dear Family and Friends,
I am writing this to you because I’m no longer here. Where have I gone you ask? Well it’s pretty simple-I can no longer live this way. The constant bullying from people at school, the constant judgment at home-I never feel good enough. I guess I’m not good enough-I never will be. I never wanted to do this and I was hoping that I could find strength within myself to push through, but it’s not there…not now and not ever. I wanted to see and do so many things-I wanted to meet Andy this summer and tell him how much he means to me. Maybe this note will find him somehow-maybe Moira will tell him all about me one day. I was born different-I will always be different and it sucks that no one can accept that besides my two closest friends.

Moira-I love you because you always stand up for yourself and I just wish that I could have that power to do that for myself. Trish-you and I have been besties since second grade and every time I had a booboo you would make it better…I love you for that. There is no making this better-there is no making me better anymore. I’m the screw up. I’m the fuck up. I’m the one who can’t handle life and anything it throws at me. Please, don’t blame yourselves because honestly this was a long time coming and there really isn’t much anyone can do to stop it.

Mom, dad-please bury me in my favorite Black Veil Brides shirt(Moira knows which one it is) and please place in my coffin my other shirts, my BVB CD and my bracelets. I’m so sorry I had to put you through this, but I honestly can’t handle my life anymore. I love you all and just know that I will miss you…I just won’t miss my life.

Love,
Brady Michelle Morris


As she finished writing up the note and looked around her messy room for a place to put it-Brady could feel her heart pounding out of her chest. This was it-there was no going back and she had finally figured out how she was going to do it. Looking around, Brady finally decided to tape the note to the screen of her computer-someone would see it sooner or later. After that was done she looked around her room, locking eyes with her BVB poster and Andy especially. She would miss him-he had been like a friend to her and yet she would never get to say goodbye to him.

Brady took a deep breath as she stood up, ignoring her buzzing phone that sat on her desk before moving towards the bathroom across the hall where her last few moments would happen. Her razor was sitting there on the edge of the sink…waiting for her for the last time.



Savior will be there
When you are feeling alone, oh
A savior for all that you do
So you live freely without their harm

“Do you know why she isn’t picking up?” Trish asked, her brown hair tucked under a knit cap and she just looked to her left towards her best friend Moira. They were walking up Brady’s driveway, the snow crunching beneath their feet and they couldn’t but feel slightly worried.

“No clue, but she should be excited that we got Warped tickets AND I have one of the leaked songs off of the guys new album!” Moira exclaimed as they walked up the front porch steps and she moved to open the door. The two girls had skipped out on school today to go get the tickets and of course Moira being the obsessive fan that she was already had half of the new album downloaded.

“Which one? Oh hi Mr. Morris-is Brady home?” The door had popped open midsentence and the girls smiled at the aging man as he let them inside and pointed up the stairs. The house was eerily quiet-usually they could hear Brady’s music blasting from outside.

“Savior. I listened to it last night-it will freaking make you cry. Brady?! Open up it’s us!” Moira smiled as she knocked on her friend’s bedroom door but there was no answer. Moira could feel in the pit of her stomach that something wasn’t right-Brady was never this quiet.

“Where is she?” Trish asked, rubbing her hands against her arms as the two girls looked around. The bedroom door was shut and so was the bathroom door, but Moira noticed that there was a light on in the bathroom.

“Maybe she’s in here…” Moira said as she knocked on the bathroom door, but there was no answer.


This was getting weird and the black haired girl couldn’t shake her fear that something was wrong. They hadn’t meant to leave Brady at school today to fend for herself, but they knew if all three of them were missing that they would get caught. Odessa-Moira’s older sister-had agreed to take the two girls in to town so that they could get the tickets and they had gotten up after Brady was already at school. Moira hadn’t thought anything of it at the time, but now that she was standing outside of the bathroom door and not hearing anything from Brady-she felt like something was really wrong.


“Brady?! Open up its Moira and Trish!” She called out and Moira pressed her ear up against the wood and then her heart stopped. She could hear crying-sobbing and without thinking twice Moira looked towards Trish and saw that the brunette had tears in her eyes.

“Go get Mr. Morris-something’s wrong…” Moira said as she turned the knob on the bathroom door and then gasped at the site she was met with.


There was so much blood and Brady was sitting there in the middle of it, crying as she just kept slicing at her own flesh. Over and over again.



When I hear your cries
Praying for light
I will be there
When I hear your cries
Praying for light
I will be there
I will be there!
I will always be there!
I will be there!


“Brady stop! Stop!” Moira screamed as she ran to her friend, her iPod falling from her hands and landing against the stained tile floor. Brady just looked up at her, those green eyes blank and sad looking as she just sat there. Brady was wedged between the tub and the toilet and Moira moved to get her friend in her arms, pressing a towel against her vertical wounds.

“It feels so nice Moira…the pain…the end is coming…” Her voice was sad, weak and Moira cried as she reached around for her iPod. Savior-Brady had to hear it…even if she died in the middle of the song, it would give her some peace.

“Hold on Brady-you have to hold on for me…” Moira cried as her fingers slipped-they were covered in blood at this point-until finally she was able to grab a hold of her iPod and flip to the BVB albums.

“I-I can’t…too much pain…too much sadness.” It was obvious that she was fading fast and so Moira quickly put on the song and held on earbud up to Brady’s ear.

“No! No here’s Andy, Brady! Remember Andy?! He has something to tell you…listen…just listen…” She was holding Brady in her arms and she could feel a calm wash over the room as Brady listened to the words that Andy had to say.


This was a song she had never heard before and as Brady listened to it, she felt her strength and will to live come back to her. The song played and Andy sang out to her-told her that he would help take her pain away and she knew that she had to hold on…she had to meet Andy and thank him for everything. The sirens seemed to be getting closer and closer and as Moira held her best friend in her arms and they listened to that song, she couldn’t help but sing along to the one guy in the world who would always be there for them.

He would never give up on them…ever. He was their savior and for that they would always survive their demons.

Notes

This story is going to work a little differently-it actually isn't a story at all. This is a collection of songfics involving the guys and the people in their lives. Some of you may recognize other characters from my other stories(Moira, Trish and Brady are from my Burn Series) but the guys will always be in the stories in some shape or form.
If you guys have any ideas as to songs that you think I might be able to use, please feel free to leave them in the comments. HOWEVER-this is not a request type situation, so I may or may not use your suggestion.

Review and tell me if you guys like this idea or not!<3